Dat update time doe. Let's get 100 reviews this chapter, shall we my beautiful readers?

"LAST TIME ON TOTAL DRAMA HEROES VS VILLAINS!" Chris announced. "We treated our campers to a relaxing, late-night stroll in the moonlight woods... After a long, boring day where Harold was annoying everyone while the male villains were trying to catch up on the sleep Lightning deprived them of with his odd snoring. Too bad the walk was the exact opposite of leisure, haha. Their objective was to get across the island. During that time, Zoey randomly went back to normal somehow, the cute animals went beserk and Heather fell into the river. Nice one, Duncan!" Chris laughed. "Oh yeah, and Cock became official... that's the name of Courtney' and Brick's new relationship, right?" There was an awkward silence. "Ahem; anyway, the Villains lost for the third time in a row, and Zoey was sent home when she realised there was something wrong with her, in the hopes that she can reconcile with Mike. But who drugged Zoey into becoming a creepy bitch? Will the Villains end up becoming the next Team Victory? And will Jo try to fuck up Cock without a blow from Courtney? ... Don't give me that look! Do you have a better idea for the ship name?!" Chris recomposed himself. "Find out, right here, on Total... Drama... HEROES VS VILLAINS!"

Courtney woke up in the resort when there was a knock on the door. Courtney yawned and looked at the clock to see it was after 7:00am and quickly went to the door and opened it to see Brick standing there with a tray of pancakes, eggs, bacon, sausage, fresh fruit and orange juice.

"Good Morning, Courtney." Brick smiled. "I brought you your breakfast in bed because a girl as great as you deserves it!"

"You didn't make this." Courtney smirked. "Are you trying to fool me into thinking you did?"

"I never claimed to have made it, Mam." Brick walked into the room and placed it on the bed. "I just thought you deserved to be treated like the woman you are."

"Finally!" Courtney hugged him. "Someone realizes how great I am!"


Courtney: It's great that after five seasons of being forced to be in contract with this show that I finally found one decent guy around here who realizes that I deserve to be treated like a princess! Duncan always called me princess but he never treated me like one. I'm hoping that I can get Brick in an alliance with me and then I'll take him to the end with me and I'll confess my love to him during the final challenge, just like Heather did back in world tour and then he'll be so in love with me that he'll practically hand the million to me!...What? Don't look at me like that, I know you're thinking but I'm not playing him, I think he's sweet but after five seasons I think I deserve the title and the money.

(End Confessional.)

"So Brick..." Courtney sat on the bed and took a sip of her orange juice. "Would you be willing to form an alliance with me? I'm thinking that we could go really far together as a team."

"I would be honored to be in an alliance with you." Brick told her. "I believe that with you in an alliance with me will have a great outcome. You're a great leader."

"Yeah, I know." Courtney smiled. "It's so sweet of you to notice."

"Courtney, would it be okay with you if I joined Jo in a jog race around the lake?" Brick asked. "I feel like I can beat her this time."

"Sounds good." Courtney nodded. "You go ahead and good luck! I'm going to finish my breakfast and take a shower and I'll see you before the challenge."

The second Brick saluted her and left the room Courtney had a few bites of her breakfast and then saw Heather walking down the hallway so she flagged her down. Heather sighed and walked in and looked at all the food on Courtney's tray in her bed.

"Over eating much?" Heather laughed. "You're not pregnant, are you? If you are I'd vote your ass out. We don't need a pregnant girl on this team."

"I'm not pregnant." Courtney rolled her eyes. "Just spoiled by Brick."

"Yeah, loverboy is taking a liking to you." Heather agreed. "Everyone can see it."

"I'm not hiding it." Courtney shrugged. "He's sweet and cute but I want to win this season. I want to do what you did to Alejandro."

"You want to use him to win the game?" Heather laughed. "Good luck, it's not as easy as it looks and Alejandro is still driving me nuts! I can't believe those stupid villains voted Alejandro out!"

"Here's a little suggestion for you..." Courtney smirked. "How would you like to join an alliance with Brick and Me?"

"What's in it for me?" Heather asked her. "You should know by now that I don't just bring anyone into an alliance with me."

"If you join an alliance with me and Brick when we merge I'll let you decide who goes first." Courtney told her. "Maybe we can bring one of the villains in with us and we can control this game?"

"Sounds good to me." Heather laughed. "I think we should monitor the villains and see which one is worthy enough to be in an alliance with us."

"Sounds good." Courtney nodded. "We'll dominate this game!"

"What are you guys talking about?" Harold asked as he entered the room. "Most likely something totally moronic, stupid, idiotic, and dumb, but I thought I'd be polite and ask."

Heather rolled her eyes. "Yes, because you're the picture of chivalry." She said sarcastically.


Heather: Well, Harold was in our first alliance, but now that Courtney thinks Jo is an uber-bitch and Harold is just the most annoying person I've ever met, I guess Jo or Harold are on the chopping block.

Courtney: This is awesome! I finally have someone who more or less cares about me and I have an alliance with two power players. That briefcase is mine!

(End Confessional.)

"Ugh, great, another day in the loser cabin." Noah groaned. "Is it bad that I'm getting used to this?"

"Don't be!" Lightning cheered, jumping out of bed and doing a triple somersault. He landed on his pinky finger ."Today we're going to sha-win! That's a sha-shiggity-sha-suriety promise!"

"Is that so?" Duncan yawned as he threw on his cloths.

"Lightning never lies...except sometimes!" Lightning defended himself. "Anyways, I gotta get some sha=protein! Sha-later!" He ran out the door.

"I'm going to go check on Gwen. She's all by herself with a broken arm, I can't believe Chris didn't let me sleep with her."

"Probably because this show doesn't cater to horny people with injury fetishes." Noah scoffed, smirking at his own joke."

Duncan didn't bother to reply and merely rolled his eyes walking out to see Gwen.

Duncan knocked on the door to the female cabin quiet enough so that only Gwen could hear it. Gwen answered it. "Hey, sorry to bother you," Duncan told her. "How's your arm?" he asked.

"It hasn't healed much," Gwen told him as she let Duncan in, "but the pain has mostly subdued for now."

"Well thank fuck for that," Duncan sighed. He sat down on Gwen's bed as Gwen sat next to him.

"Well, it feels a little empty in here now that Zoey is gone," Gwen lamented. "I'm glad she's not hitting on you, and her elimination is a chance to patch things up with Mike, but I hate being all alone."

Duncan wrapped his arm around her shoulder. "It's okay to feel lonely," he assured her. "It happens to everyone. It's just the first time you've had a cabin all to yourself since the finale. I kinda wished I supported you instead of Owen," he chuckled.

"I remember that," Gwen agreed with a smirk. "But if you were supporting me, then things would've been more awkward between us for the next two seasons." Duncan decided to change the subject in case they brought up anyting that would trigger guilty feelings.

"Well, there is only four of us now," Duncan sighed. "You, me, Lightning, Noah... normally I don't give a shit whether we win or lose, but I don't want to risk another elimination."

"I hear ya," Gwen muttered. "Too bad my arm will be a bitch because of that stupid Jo. You don't blame Harold for this, do you?"

"I was angry with him, but Noah assured me after I calmed down that he would never do that on purpose, knowing me," Duncan replied. "After all, I've stopped bullying him for good. He would never want to bring this back. I don't either, but you'd be paranoid if your bully left you alone and something unlucky happened. Jo is definitely going donw."

"I'm glad you've left Harold alone," Gwen smiled. "You two brought the worst out of each other... well, he's a dick now, but still."

"That aside, you are not to feel guilty or any of that shit if we lose, okay?" Duncan told Gwen. "It was Jo's fault your arm got hurt, and you are a strong girl anyway. I'm certain you can pull through in challenges with a broken arm."

"I'll do my best," Gwen told him. "Thank you for coming to see me."

"I'm your boyfriend, it's what I do," Duncan told her.

"ALRIGHT CAMPERS, IT'S TIME FOR THE NEXT CHALLENGE!" Chris barked through the intercom.

"Well that killed the moment," Gwen rolled her eyes and Duncan agreed.

"C'mon, let's go get this over with." Gwen shrugged as she and Duncan met everyone else at a place Chris was yelling about, it was apparently called 'the fun zone' and the more Gwen looked around on the way there, the less fun this place was starting to look.

"Hurry up!" Chris yelled and looked at his watch. "We don't have all day! I'm doing an interview for a magazine this afternoon! You two need to stop making out and enjoying the scenery and get over here now!"

"What magazine are you going to be sha-in?" Lightning asked Chris.

"Why do you care?" Heather glared at Lightning.

"Because I want to sha-read it!" Lightning yelled. "I like to keep up on the sha-gossip about the sha-losers around here!"

"Anyway..." Chris glared at Heather and Lightning. "Now that the lovebirds Gwen and Duncan are here we can start today's challenge, which involves a nice little trip to the fun zone!"

"What's in this 'fun zone' that we have to do?" Noah sighed. "Does it involve me doing stupid things with my team again? Because the last time we did a challenge I got stick in quicksand with some idiots..."

"Remember how I said that I got rid of all those toxic fumes and spills from the island?" Chris asked laughing.

"You didn't?" Jo sighed. "Did you?"

"Nope." Chris laughs. "I put them all in this little isolated area with a cheap wooden wall blocking it! Today's challenge is that you get to go in there and grab six mutant eggs! Once you grab them you can bring them out here and place them in these giant nests right next to where Chef and I set up our folding chairs. Hey Chef, you wanna make an intern get us some lemonade?"

"Only if you don't put a shitload of sugar in the pitcher!" Chef glared at Chris. "The last time you and I shared a pitcher of lemonade you dumped it all in! The whole thing! Only dump the sugar in the glass you're drinking out of man!"

"You mean you two are going to be out here sipping lemonade until we get bring you the stupid eggs?" Heather glared. "You know, you should at least be inside this 'fun zone' to supervise the challenge!"

"Are you kidding me?" Chris laughed. "I don't want to die, that's why you won't be seeing Chef or myself step foot on the other side of that gate."

"How am I supposed to do this challenge?" Gwen asked as she looked at her arm. "Hello injury!"

"You have two hands." Chris laughed. "Have fun! The challenge starts now!"


Jo: This is one challenge that I'm sure I'll win at! I may be a newbie compared to the people like Courtney and Duncan but they weren't here when the island was completely toxic so they don't know how to deal with this waste the way I do.

Lightning: Lightning is really curious to see what sha-magazine Chris is going to sha-be in!

(End Confessional.)

Everyone ran into the 'fun zone' and started looking around for eggs. Duncan instantly started following Gwen who seemed annoyed by the challenge.

"This is fun, just you and me finally alone at last." Duncan wrapped his arm around her. "Right, babe?"

"If you say so." Gwen sighed. "Let's at least make an actual effort to bring something back."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Duncan asked her.

"I want to focus on actually winning a challenge." Gwen told him. "I think we should split up."

"You're breaking up with me?!" Duncan asked her and she turned around and sighed.

"No, I care about you but I want to win this." Gwen told him. "I just want to prove to this team that I'm more then 'Duncan's Girlfriend' and that I can win challenges on my own."

"You don't have to prove anything." Duncan told her. "Plus, you have the screwed up arm."

"I'll see you at the finish line." Gwen walked over to Duncan and kissed him on the cheek before walking off and leaving Duncan standing there.


Duncan: I hope this doesn't mean she wants to break up, I really don't want to break up with Gwen and I don't think she can handle the eggs with her arm being the way it is.

(End Confessional.)

"Let's move, soldiers!" Jo shouted. "We're going to keep up this winning streak!"

"Yes ma'-uh," Brick started to salute, but remembered what Courtney had told him. "Whatever, if I feel like it!"

Jo eyed him strangely. "You feeling okay, doofus?"

"I feel fine, Jo." Brick rolled his eyes. "Just leave me alone, okay?"

Jo rolled her eyes as well. "Whatever, have your hissy fit, just win the challenge."

"Yes, lets..." Courtney scoffed, taking Brick by the arm and stalking off.

"Good, their dead weight!" Jo muttered to hersefl.

"Gosh, I know right? We can totally own this." Said a voice right next to her.

"Harold," Jo sighed, rubbing her temples. "Screw. Off." She then kicked Harold in the testicles.


Jo: Okay, maybe that was unjustified but Harold has been really irritating all season and Brick is standing up to me. I don't know whats going on and I don't like it. I have to reign these people in before they overpower and overrule me!

Harold: *His voice is high pitched* Ah-ha-ha, my grapes! *He sighs in agony* Everyone treats me like scum...its not my fault their all morons. Besides, I have a bet to win! The science fair will be mine!

(End Confessional.)

"Okay...gigantic forest...horrible mutants...maybe its not such a bad thing to be paired with an idiot musclehead...AGAIN." Noah thought out loud.

"Hmm. Lightning doesn't want to lose another teammate." Lightning mused. "We gotta find these eggs sha-quickly!" He gestured to Noah. "Hop on, skinny guy!"


Noah: It was my diginity, or a million dollars. What do you THINK I chose?

(End Confessional.)

Brick and Courtney were away from everyone else when Courtney stated to look around for eggs while Brick was looking at the tall grass and the rocks around them before he started kicking a rock with his foot. Courtney noticed that and got annoyed.

"Brick, are you going to look for eggs or are you just going to kick rocks around?" Courtney sighed. "I want to win this challenge!"

"I'm sorry!" Brick stood up and saluted her. "Do you want me to climb a tree or something and look?"

"No." Courtney sighed. "I'm...Uh...Sorry. You're doing fine and I'm just not used to having a nice guy around me. Do you think you can just help me a little bit and not kick rocks as much?"


Courtney: Okay, so I'm trying to be nice to Brick and not yell at him like he's a complete idiot. I'm just not used to it because almost everyone on this show is an idiot. I'm just going to have to try a lot harder! I told him to stand up to Jo, I shouldn't yell at him or smack him around like she would.

Brick: I really like being with Courtney! She has so much determination to win this challenge! It helps that she was a C.I.T. or that's what she tells me anyway...

(End Confessional.)

"Hey, I think I see an egg!" Brick pointed on the ground as they watched a 3 foot worm with teeth shove an egg in the hole and then went in right after. "How do you feel about giant, slimy worms?"

"If the giant slimy worm has an egg then I feel pretty damn good about it." Courtney smirked. "How about you grab the worm and I'll reach in and get the egg?"

"Ready?" Brick grabbed the tail of the worm and pulled it out of the hole while it let out a screech and Courtney quickly reached down in the hole and grabbed the egg and pulled it out. It was covered in a sticky slim and Courtney found that disgusting but at least she got the egg.

"Ewww!" Courtney exclaimed. "This is so gross! Just let it go and let's keep moving."

"How about I just fling it?" Brick suggested as he flung it in the air as far as he could. "Let's go find us some more eggs!"

"Is that an egg?" Gwen asked, pointing with her good arm to an egg that was standing in the middle of nowhere.

"I see two perfect eggs right in front of me." Duncan wiggled his eyebrows, half joking and half flirty, glancing at Gwen's chest.

"Haha." Gwen rolled her eyes and punched him in the arm, but was still smiling.

"I'll go get the egg." Duncan shrugged. He jogged into the clearing and grabbed it. He tugged on it. Nothing happened.

"Okay, Noah, put your back into." Gwen mocked, laughing.

"It's...not...budging!" Duncan grunted. Suddenly the ground started to shake violently.

"Whoa, whoa!" Duncan cried as a huge beast erupted from the ground under him. The beast, seeing DUncan on its face, ran off into the woods, roaring.

Gwen crept towards the hole where the beast emerged and saw four huge eggs.

"Looks like I'll only be able to get one a time." The goth sighed as she slid down into the hole. Using her decent strength, she was able to shoulder shove the egg out of the hole. "Lucky this egg is pliable." Gwen sighed, wiping sweat off her face as she leaned on the egg.

"Stupid Island." Gwen muttered.


Gwen: and now a mutant monster just took off in the woods with my boyfriend...Nice...I guess it's up to me to get these eggs and find my boyfriend."

(End Confessional.)

Heather was in a bush trying to figure out how to get a nest out of a tree that belonged to a miniature bear with bat wings. Once she managed to knock the nest down she collected three medium sized eggs. As she walked away to take the eggs back to the nest, Noah and Lightning ran quickly past her while Noah knocked the eggs down out of her hands and the two of them ran away laughing.

"Come back here!" Heather yelled. "Come back here and face me like a men!"


Heather: First Noah gets rid of my boyfriend and now he gets rid of my eggs! They're broken on the ground and that's how Chris is going to describe Noah's face when I get a hold of him! He's going to pay for all of this!

(End Confessional.)

"Maybe we should've grabbed the eggs." Noah pondered, still running.

"Nah, we got one right here." Lightning held up an egg they had found previously.

"Still." Noah shrugged. "But it was pretty hilarious."

The two emerged into the clearing with the bowls. Lightning placed the egg into the basket.

"And one for the Villains!" Chris announced.

"Ugh." Jo sighed, walking by herself. "Useless team!"


Jo: I don't try to be a bitch! I can't help it when you're stuck on a team that is useless it's kind of hard! What do you expect to happen when you bring back the top drama kings and queens? All they ever do is yell at each other! I personally couldn't care less who Duncan wants to sleep with, he can have a threesome with Courtney, Gwen and Zoey and I would walk in on it and I wouldn't even say anything! I'd just walk out the door and go for my morning jog. None of these people even want to play this game!

(End Confessional.)

Jo was getting walking around the woods looking for eggs and ended up finding nothing. Getting annoyed she stormed off up a hill and started cursing, when she reached the top she sat down on a log to catch her breath. Unfortunately for Jo the log wasn't very sturdy and it started to roll off the cliff, taking Jo down with it.

"Ahhhhhhhhh!" Jo yelled as she crashed landed face first ,landing on a 7 foot tall mutant gopher, knocking it out cold and fell off of it landing in a nest. "Sweet! Look at these eggs! This will win us the challenge for sure!


Jo: How lucky am I?! I found 12 giant eggs! It'll take some muscle and time but at least I'll be able to prove my worth to the team! That is...If any of them actually remember that we're doing a challenge!

(End Confessional.)

Jo started to roll the first egg and was already out of breath and she wasn't even halfway there. She bumped into Harold and normally she would kick his ass but she needed him if she was going to win this.

"Hey!" Jo yelled. "Nerdy fact weirdo!"

"I have a name, you know?" Harold approached her. "What do you want now?"

"I was thinking that you actually help me push this egg to the finish line." Jo gestured to the egg. "There's like 12 of them and if you help me I think we can win this."

"Yeah, I'll help you." Harold agreed, and the two started to push the egg, Harold reached into his pocket for a moment than clapped Jo on the back, making her jump and wince.

"Ow, dweeb. What the heck was that for?" Jo snarled.

"Sorry." Harold said quickly, tossing something into the undergrowth. "Just commending you on finding this. Excellent work."

Gwen deposited her egg into the basket after a long and painful toil.

"Two to the Villains!" Chris yelled. "Boy, the Heroes better step it up!"

Just then, Brick ran into the clearing and deposited the egg he and Courtney had gathered into their bowl.

"Scratch that, thats one for the Heroes!" Chris corrected.

Jo and Harold ran into the clearing, depositing that one egg into the basket.

"And the Heroes have tied it up." Chris yelled.

"Brick, Courtney!" Jo called. "I found this huge nest with a dozen eggs in it! Come help me grab some! They're gigantic so I can't grab them all at once."

Brick and Courtney, despite their dislike for Jo, were able to put that aside for the sake of winning the challenge, and followed the nerd and the bully.

Gwen gasped. "Oh no, not good."


Gwen: If we lose I'm totally going home! Unless Duncan convinces Lightning to vote for Noah. But still, Noah's a decent guy and I'd rather just not lose at all. So not good!

(End Confessional)

"Sha-smash!" Lightning chuckled, standing over the remains of eleven hugs smashed eggs.

"Good one." Noah complimented. "Glad we saw Jo and Harold hoisting these things out of here. Better to just smash them up."

At that moment, the entire Heroes team minus Heather came hurling into the clearing. Jo's jaw dropped at seeing Lightning and Noah standing over the shattered remaisn of the eggs, with the former having raw egg smeared all over his hands and chest.

"Uh..." Noah squeaked as Jo's color rose. "I suggest we..."

"SHA-GET THE HELL OUTTA HERE!" Lightning screamed, bolting into the forest. Noah was just able to grab onto the jocks jersey as Jo gave a roar of rage and chased them down, yelling.

"You bastards! Those were our eggs!" She yelled as she ran.


Noah: *Looking terrified* Totally worth it...I think...

Lightning: *Looking exhilirated* Totally worth it! Lightning hasn't had that much of an adrenilane rush since he met that bear when he was five years old! It sha-still surprises me that Jo's a girl, Lightning has never seen a girl run so fast!

(End Confessional)

Heather was walking by herself in the forest, grouchy and still on the lookout for eggs.

"You know." Chris taunted from his safe location outside the 'Fun Zone'. "You're boring right now, you're barely getting any screen time."

"Shut it!" Heather snapped to the sky. "I'm doing my best!"

"Heather is boring, Heather is boring." Chris sang, causing the ravenhead to growl in frustration.


Heather: I hate that man.

Duncan: Even though I was trapped on that mutant, I heard Chris taunting Heather. Usually I hate that guy. Right then, I loved that guy. *He laughs*.

(End Confessional.)

Gwen was walking the woods all by herself, she was whistling and looking everywhere for eggs and it didn't help that she had no clue which mutant creatures even laid eggs and which ones didn't. As Gwen was looking she heard something stampeding behind her and quickly moved out of the way as she seen Duncan screaming while he was still involuntarily riding that mutant creature.

"Hey ugly!" Gwen yelled as the creature turned around and she hit it with a rock, obviously the wrong didn't hurt the creature, it just seemed to piss it off and it made the creature chase Gwen. "Oh shit!"

Gwen ran as fast as she could as the creature chased her and she ended up by the same hill Jo was by right before she fell, even though Gwen didn't know that she ran to the edge of it and watched as it came towards her.

"Duncan! You need to jump!" Gwen yelled. "Jump off the stupid thing if you want to survive!"

"Oh god..." Duncan whispered to himself before closing his eyes. "One...Two..."

"Three!" Gwen yelled at him. "Just jump!"

Duncan jumped off of the creature, making a loud thud as he landed on the ground safely and looked as Gwen rolled out of the creatures path and Duncan quickly got up to watch the creature go down and make a huge splat as it hit the ground.

"Nice one Gwen." Duncan walked over to her and held out a hand so he could help her up. "You okay?"

"Now that I know you're okay and that I didn't break my other arm." Gwen laughed "Do you think that we still have a shot to win this challenge?"

"Hopefully." Duncan caught his breath. "Where do you wanna look now for eggs?"

"I'm starting to think that we may have better luck looking in the water." Gwen told him. "I can't look though, not with this stupid cast that they gave me!"


Gwen: I don't care what Chef says, this cast is horribly put on! Chef isn't a doctor and shouldn't be allowed to put cast on teenagers!

Duncan: Gwen saved my ass, not many chicks would do that! I knew there was a reason my lips picked her in World Tour!

(End Confessional.)

"I don't think you should be near the water." Duncan told her. "I don't want to risk anything else happening to you."

"Do you want to go look in the caves?" Gwen asked. "I'm pretty sure we can find something awesome there."

"If not we could always make out?" Duncan suggested and put his arm around Gwen and then pulled her close to him and kissed her. "Sound good?"

"Yeah." Gwen blushed. "That sounds really good..."

Courtney was crawling around in some tall grass and came out with two eggs, Brick guarded the area to make sure she was safe while she did it. When she came out she had two small eggs about the size of Brick's palm.

"Check these out." Courtney handed him two pink eggs. "I stole these from a flower that was growling at me. It was hilarious, I mean really? Mutant flowers lay eggs?"

"Does it count?" Brick asked. "I mean they aren't technically animals."

"Chris never said they had to be animal eggs." Courtney laughed. "Hey Brick, I just wanted to thank you for helping me with a lot of stuff, you're a great guy and so much more polite then half the guys back home or on this show! So, thanks for being a great guy."

"Just doing my duty." Brick blushed. "Any guy in my position would do the same thing. There are lots of gentlemen, you just need to look in the right places."

"I think that I just did." Courtney stepped closer to Brick, placed her hands on his shoulders and leaned in for a kiss. "What do you say we win this thing and then we spend the night together? Maybe walk around the beach for awhile?"

"That sounds amazing." Brick stood there blushing.

"Great." Courtney said happily. "Let's get moving then!" The two ran off.


Courtney: Yes, I may be using Brick, but its not like I'm a parasite! I like the guy, I really do! Maybe not as much as I'm telling him...but he doesn't need to know that! He's still a big sweetie and I enjoy spending time with him.

(End Confessional.)

"Heather is a boring pants, doo-dah, doo-dah! Heather is a boring pants, oh dee do dah day!" Chris sang, effectively driving Heather absoultely nuts.

"Don't you need to do your bi-hourly jack off or something?" She yelled into the air.

"Who says I'm not doing it right now?" Chris taunted back, before laughing. "No, but seriously." He said, his voice turning stern. "I'm not. That'd be nasty. And illegal. Stop being dirty, Heather."

Heather just scoffed and rolled her eyes.


Heather: This would be more tolerable if I could just find some damned eggs!

(End Confessional.)

"And the score is now 5-4, Villains leading!" Chris announced as everyone who currently had eggs deposited them in a relatively close amount of time. "By the way, since this is going kind of fast, I'm changing the rules! So I need everyone here!" The host pressed a button, and within seconds all the campers, by one unpleasant way or another, were back at the starting ground.

"Really?" Noah sighed, his body crumpled. "A springboard hidden under some moss? That's how I'm going to die?"

"Walk it off, pansy!" Chris laughed.

"Yeah, at least you didn't have to deal with beavers!" Harold scowled, burnt to a crisp. "That breathe fire."

Duncan paused from removing quills from him and Gwen long enough to laugh at the nerd.

"Anyways, despite your hilarious pain, I'm upping the game." Chris told them. "You now need ten eggs to complete the challenge."

"Oh come on!" Lightning cried. "That's way too sha-many! That's..." He paused. "Like...well...too many! Dude, that's seriously uncool."

"We only need five more." Gwen sighed. She then glared at Chris. "By the way, Chris, being launched from some freakishly mutated porcupine kangaroo? Not so great for the broken arm.

"Eh, I'd apologize if I cared." Chris shrugged, now leaving the Fun Zone. "Now get working!"

"You can't do that!" Jo yelled,

"I can and I just did." Chris laughed. "Hope you guys are having a blast!"

"Great..." Courtney sighed. "Now I have to walk even further to get to where I was!"

"C'mon Courtney." Brick smiled. "We got this."

The two started to walk away from the group and Heather remembered that Chris wasn't cutting her any slack and decided to start running to catch up to Brick and Courtney. When she managed to catch up she was almost out of breath.

"What do you want?" Courtney glared at Heather when she saw her. "We're kinda looking for eggs here."

"We're kinda on the same team." Heather reminded her. "I think we'd collect more eggs if we worked together."

"You know, I heard Chris on the intercom." Courtney smirked. "Why don't you just jerk Chris off and maybe you can get further in the game...That's how you almost always make it to the finals, right?"

"No!" Heather yelled at her. "That is NOT how I always make it to the finals."

"Don't get so defensive." Courtney laughed. "If you're looking with us then you better keep your eyes open."

"Whatever." Heather glared at them.


Heather: Normally I'd cream Courtney for that comment but right now I'm not exactly miss popularity and if we lose and I don't find an egg then I'm most likely on the chopping block and going home. If that means that I have to be nice and hang out with Mr. and Mrs. MacArthur then I'll do it. There are worse people that I can hang out with! Take that Chris, looks like I'm not flying solo anymore.

Brick: I like Courtney but I'm not a fan of Heather but if Courtney wants her to come with us, I guess that's okay. I know Courtney told me not to let people push me around but I like Courtney and I can't help listen to what she wants.

(End Confessional.)

"Alright babe, where to next?" Duncan yawned, treading through the forest with his girlfriend.

"I don't know." Gwen commented. "Maybe we can go...I don't know. Let's just roam around."

"Sounds good." Duncan wiggled his eyebrows.

"You're so weird." Gwen laughed, leaning against him.

Duncan snorted. "That's why you love me."

"Sure it is." Gwen rolled her eyes playfully. "Keep your head in the game, Mr. Testosterone."

Noah and Lightning had now split up, and Noah was searching through a rather dense part of the forest.

"Here, eggy egg eggs." Noah rolled his eyes. Suddenly, an egg hit him in the face. "Ow!"


Noah: So, I found this egg and it smells really bad and it's about the size of my whole arm, that really hurt my head and almost killed me. Why does this type of thing always seem to happen to me? Everyone else finds romance and makes friends and I get hit in the head with egg and left in England and kicked off the show for not being part of the team! Sports aren't my thing and if this egg was from a normal animal, I could tell you what it's from. Now it sounds like I'm Harold. Can we edit this tape and forget I even made this confessional?"

(End Confessional.)

Noah sighed and took this egg back to the nest for his team, while he was walking back and about to put it in, the egg hatched and out popped a two headed, pinkish looking rat/naked mole thing (That thing Sierra called her baby in the challenge originally) that hissed at Noah the second it hatched from that egg.

"Seriously?!" Noah yelled. "Chris! What do I do if the damn thing hatches?!"

"It counts as long as it stays in your basket!" Chris yelled from the intercom as Jo rolled another large egg into her basket and stopped to catch her breath.

"Wait! What's stopping Jo from taking it?!" Noah yelled. "It keeps trying to crawl out and bite my hand!"

"I never said that you couldn't steal someone's eggs or critters from their basket!" Chris laughed and Jo smirked.

"Guess I'm staying here and possibly getting a rabies shot after this challenge." Noah groaned and leaned against the basket.

"I supposed I can wait a little bit longer for someone to watch the basket." Jo stuck her tongue out at Noah. "In the meantime, it looks like it's just you and me! Rabies bait."

"Great." Noah sighed.

Harold was all by himself, scribbling notes.

"Should kick in soon." He muttered to himself as he walked.

"And the Heroes lead 7-6." Chris announced. "Though Noah is having some hilarious problems with his hatched creature."

Harold sighed upon hearing the announcement. "Gosh."

"Sha-AGHHHH!" Lightning screamed, currently in the mouth of Larry the giant plant monster.


Lightning: Lightning remembered that he needed to grab the flower to scare him away. How was I supposed to remember you weren't supposed to stand in his sha-mouth and taunt him! Sha-jeeze, you viewers are all just a sha-bunch of sha-smart guys!

(End Confessional.)

Larry spit Lightning against a tree. The flower caught the wind and sailed away into the forest. Larry roared and chased after it. Underneath him were two huge eggs.

"Sha-yeah!" Lightning grinned, spitting out half his teeth, which of course magically reappeared in the next scene, because that's just the way to make things convienent.

Lightning ran to the basket where Noah was fighting off the creature that he had the 'privilege' of hatching. When Lightning tossed the two eggs into the basket, Noah took that as the perfect time to take off and leave Lightning there.

"Here." Noah tossed the creature at Lightning. "Make sure they stay in the basket, I'm going to be anywhere that isn't here right now."

"Wait!" Lightning yelled as Noah quickly took off. "I didn't know you were a girl and you were pregnant!"


Lightning: I didn't know that chick was pregnant and she had her baby during this challenge and nobody helped, that's so Sha-rude! If she thinks I'm not charging her for babysitting she's totally Sha-wrong!

(End Confessional.)

Duncan was looking around for more eggs when he decided to stick his head in a large hole he found in the ground.

"I bet I can find some eggs in here." Duncan declared to Gwen.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you." Gwen sighed. "Don't you know that you shouldn't just stick your face in strange holes in the ground?"

"Oh yeah?" Duncan reached his hand in the hole and pulled out seven eggs. "Check these out! How many can you carry?"

"I would say around three." Gwen told him. "Now let's go and win this thing!"

Gwen and Duncan grabbed the eggs and quickly made their way back to the baskets where Lightning was 'babysitting' and they quickly tossed the eggs in.

"Urg! Where the hell is my team?!" Jo yelled in frustration. "I have to get back to that damn nest!"

Right on cue, Courtney and Brick showed up and placed two in the heroes basket. Jo sighed and finally stomped her foot hard on the ground.

"Hey Sargent moron!" Jo yelled. "Be a man and watch the basket!"

"No way, I only listen to Courtney from now on." Brick told her and looked at back at Courtney. "Right Courtney?"

"Come here, miss B.I.T.C.H." Jo shoved Brick by the basket and went close to Courtney and whispered in her ear. "I know where we can score 10 eggs and they're huge. We can get them and leave Captain dumbass here and we can win this. He's the best one to watch the nest."

"Fine." Courtney groaned. "You better not be lying."

"I'm not." Jo told her.

"Brick, watch the basket!" Courtney yelled. "I'll be back in 10 minutes!"

"Yes ma'am!" Brick saluted.

Jo and Courtney found the large store of eggs.

"Told you I wasn't lying." Jo smirked.

"Just shut up and help me." Courtney hissed, and the two powerful females lifted the best up above their heads.

"Let's do this." Jo commanded, and the two took off towards the woods.

"We're almost there!" Duncan panted, emerging into the clearing where the bowl was. The bowl was about 100 yards away. "23 got this." Duncan encouraged, as he and Gwen ran.

When the two got within seventy yards, they heard a nose behind them, and turned just in time to see Jo and Courtney burst into the clearing. Despite the heavy eggs, the two were quickly gaining ground.

After twenty seconds of sprinting, Jo and Courtney had overtaken 'Gwuncan' by fifteen yards and were looking like the clear winners.

"I don't...feel so...good." Jo moaned, slowing her pace down before collapsing completely.

Overwhelmed by the weight of the eggs, Courtney struggled to keep the nest in balance. She succeeded, but was slowed enough for Gwen and Duncan to overtake her and dump the eggs in the basket.

"And the Villains win...finally!" Chris laughed.

"What!?" Courtney yelled. "You'e got to be kidding me! You're so going down for this Jo!"

Jo ended up throwing up on the ground and Courtney was too busy cursing to care, Heather was the one who actually went up to her and helped.

"Hello, Chris!" Heather yelled. "Our teammate is throwing up! Aren't you going to do something about it?"

"She can walk it off." Courtney rolled her eyes. "She's been a bitch this whole game that I played with her. Since when did you start caring about people other then yourself?"

"Since you've been distracted this whole time!" Heather told her. "If someone is throwing up and looks like shit then you help them, especially if they're on your team!"


Courtney: Since when did Heather actually care about anyone who isn't her or Alejandro? I don't know why I even try to work with her when we play this game together, it never works! Heather is like a female Duncan and that's the last thing I need in my life!

Heather: Of course I'm going to help Jo! All Courtney's been doing is flirting with Brick! She really never does anything else to help our team! It's Jo, Myself and Courtney being the only girls on this team and if all Courtney's going to do is gush over Brick then she can go the hell home!

Brick: I really like Courtney and I think she wants Jo to go home because of me. You know when I was training last summer some of the other cadets said to me that girls only pick on you because they like you. Do you think that Jo is faking being sick and throwing up because she wanted my attention? What do you do when two girls like you? I just hope Courtney never finds out because then they'll have a cat fight and I'll be labeled as the next Duncan. That means I'll have to vote one of them out!

(End Confessional.)

"All right!" Chef came barging through and picked Jo up and threw her on a gurney. "She's going to the medical bay! Ya'll better stay away in case she's contagious! If ya'll get sick too then we'll have no season!"

An hour later Jo was brought to the elimination ceremony and only had a small case of the chills where she claimed she was cold but Chef couldn't figure it out nor could any of the interns who were checking her out to make sure things were as good with her as they were going to be.

"Alright Heroes!" Chris laughed. "You had a very strange day. First you managed to lose the challenge, then one of your team members ended up dropping to the ground and throwing up. The heroes team has two people who most wouldn't even consider heroes, this is really a crazy season! With any luck, this will get me another season! Anyway, you guys have voted and now one of you is going to be leaving us in a very funny and humiliating way!"

"Just get on with it!" Heather yelled at Chris

"Fine!" Chris groaned. "The first marshmallow is for Brick!"

"Thank you, sir!" Brick caught it and saluted Chris.

"Next we have one for Heather." Chris threw one at her. "Even though she's been a bitch and I don't think she deserves it..."

"Like it matter what you think." Heather rolled her eyes and ate her marshmallow. "You know I'm what gives you the ratings you love so much!"

"Moving on!" Chris glared at her. "Next Marshmallow goes to Harold."

"Did you know tha-" Harold was about to say but Chris cut him off.

"If you say a fact then I'm kicking you off the show." Chris informed him. "Anyway, Jo and Courtney! You two have been at each other's throats and it's been getting on everyone's nerves. I find you both to be annoying and now of you is saying bye! I have one left and the last one goes to...Courtney."

"Yes!" Courtney caught her Marshmallow. "in your face!"

"I hate you all so much." Jo was still cold. "If I wasn't so cold and I didn't feel like I wanted to curl up and die I would destroy you all. Next time we compete, you're all going to pay."

"You're all going to pay for this!" Jo yelled as Chef dragged her away. "C'mon! I don't need to be put in cold water when I'm already cold! You're all going to pay for this! I'm going to the doctor and when I find out what's wrong with me I'm going to sue every one of you!"

"And there goes go with an ending statement that involves a lawsuit!" Chris laughed. "I feel like I'm sending Courtney away instead of Jo! Tune in next time when we send another one of these losers home, right here on Total Drama All-stars!"

Voting Confessionals:

Jo: I'm voting for Courtney because I can't stand her! She's such a bitch! Oh God, I don't feel so good...

Courtney: I'm voting for Jo because she's been so mean to brick and she cost us the challenge!

Heather: I'm voting for Courtney because she really isn't that focused on the game at all. At least Jo tried, I can't deal with her and Brick all the time! She needs to go so we can do better.

Brick: I could never vote for Courtney, I think I might love her! She makes me feel like I have butterflies flying around in my stomach. Bye Jo! That's what you get for messing with me all the time.

Harold: I'm voting for Jo because of things that I don't think I can talk about right now or everything will be ruined! All I'm saying is I need to work harder if I'm going to win.

Final Result:

Jo: Three votes. (Brick, Courtney, Harold.)

Courtney: Two votes. (Heather, Jo.)

Heroes: Brick, Courtney, Harold, Heather.

Villains: Duncan, Gwen, Lightning, Noah.

Eliminated: Sierra, Mike, Alejandro, Scott, Zoey, Jo.

I hope you guys enjoyed! Let's get to 100 reviews!