Billa Baggins sat at her window, tears in far away eyes highlighted by the fire flies that buzzed merrily in the moonlight. Her thoughts lingered to the mountain, so strong she could almost taste the cold air, frost nipping at her nose and tossing her hair. No matter what she tried, when the world stopped and the chores of the day were done that was where her mind returned, time and time again. For five long years she had tried to forget that blasted mountain. To forget the ache in her heart when she thought of her dwarves, even now she thought of them as hers. Could still hear their laughter and their songs, she had never forgotten the words.
It had hurt so much to leave them, if possible her heart had broken even more to know that they wanted her gone. After all they had gone through the banishment was upheld.
A stranger had delivered the news to her outside of the mountain gates. Thorin was dead. Dead. The king under the mountain had banished her from the home she had helped claim, and it had shattered her to know he had died with such hatred for her. That he had been taken from Fili and Kili, taken from the ones who loved him. Taken from her. It pained her really, to be so distraught, to know that one person who had never really loved her could take away her dignity, could leave her hollowed. In that moment it hadn't mattered though. A part of her heart had died with Thorin, buried beneath the lonely mountain.
It was unfair, but as she had found out, life was very rarely fair.
Billa hadn't remembered what Gandalf had spoken to her about as he had guided her from Erebor, even Beorn could not lift her spirits. Nothing had made sense to her until they had reached Rivendell. It was Lord Elrond who had managed to get through her grief, told her of the gift she had left the mountain with.
At first Billa thought he had meant the Arkenstone, which had been thrust upon her by a distraught Fili, begging her to take to jewel that had destroyed so much. The blonde prince was the only one of the company she had set eyes on before leaving, she hadn't even been sure that they all survived. Fili would say nothing else to her, other than to take the stone and Billa knew then she had lost her family.
It turned out that Lord Elrond had meant something much more valuable than a glowing rock. A child. Billa Baggins of Bag-end was carrying a babe within her womb. It had been the shock she had needed to stir back to life, the grief was still raw, but there was someone she must fight for, and if Billa Baggins had learned anything on her journey it was how to fight.
Billa smiled wistfully as she recalled when Frerin had been placed into her arms by Elrond's daughter Arwen (for the elves had insisted she stay in order to oversee her pregnancy, the stubbornness of dwarves was easily matched by the elves). She had ached more than she'd known was possible, and her exhaustion seemed to reach her very bones, but there was a love there so strong she had cried and whispered promises of protection and sacrifice.
Now here she was, five years later sitting in Bag-end, the parchment in front of her and a quill in her hand, Billa felt a sense of dread. Her little Frerin was not a hobbit, not entirely, and she knew that he deserved to see his homeland. His questions had become constant, and Billa knew she could not lie, even at five Frerin knew he was different and so did the other hobbits.
Taller than even the tallest Hobbit faunts at five he was stronger, faster and had a fascination for weapons. A fascination that could see him, or those around him hurt without the proper training. He had already tried picking up sticks, hitting his cousins over the heads like they were axes. He had even started battles in which he jumped from trees often landing on unsuspecting children. Billa had tried to find a tutor in Bree and even in the Shire, but there was no one who could teach Frerin what he needed to learn to control his strength. She had toyed with the idea of finding another dwarf, but it did not sit right with her. No dwarf could replace kin.
For all his dwarf habits he still had a Hobbit's appetite, his smaller feet were never covered as he raced around the shire, and he understood the need for home comforts, snuggling in front of fire mug of warm chocolate in small yet strong hands. Billa did not want to return but she couldn't deny that it was time. For Frerin and the arkenstone that she had hidden in her closet.
Sealing the envelope before she lost her never she took a deep breathe poured a cup of tea.
The letter would be sent in the morning post, and she prayed that the new King under the Mountain would allow her to return.
If this update does come up I'm sorry! A lot has happened since the latest chapter :D I'm now married and we are currently trying to buy our first home. I've gotten so rusty with the story that I'm going trough the chapters updating the story, improving it. This will get me back into the swing of writing again :D