Disclaimer: I own no cartoon series Disney has any interest in, all hail the Mouse!


Dipper had looked up magical amulets in his journal, it turned out to be a lot easier than he thought to make one, just requiring a certain stone that could only be found deep in the forest. It took most of the day for him to find the area the stones were in and then he simply waited till nightfall for the softly glowing stones to make their presence known. He'd set up his tent and waited, there were warnings about mental derangement and facing your darkest fears, but after the Gremloblin he really wasn't concerned. Heck there was even a cleansing ritual that would prevent the stones from corrupting the user and get rid of that glowing aura that let people know you were using it.

Dipper was confident; he had a plan!

Noon the next day

Dipper shivered, his hair was completely white and he had developed a squirrel phobia but it was worth it, he had his stones!

His campsite packed itself behind him, packing up everything into his backpack which floated along behind him like a balloon as he headed back to the shack. His trip out of the woods was a lot easier as he flew across streams and floated over deadfalls. It was only three by the time he reached the shack.

"Dude, what's up with the hair?" Wendy asked.

"Stared into the abyss, unspeakable horror, you know the drill," Dipper replied easily.

"You saw Stan naked?" Wendy asked.

Dipper shuddered in horror. "NO, Thank god!"

"Dude, ready for movie night?" Soos interrupted.

"Oh yeah," Dipper agreed with a grin.

"Are you sure, Dude?" Soos asked. "Mabel just got the sequel to Dream Boy High."

"I got it covered," Dipper replied.

"That grin's looking a little evil," Soos noted.

"It's supposed to," Dipper said. "I have an evil plan!"

"Good luck," Soos said, knowing Dipper had lost the race to the remote the last five times thanks to Mabel's expert use of a grappling hook.

That night

"Ready? Go!" Mabel shouted turning and firing her grappling hook so she could swing down the stairs only to stare in shock as Dipper leapt off as well and landed unharmed right next to her. Despite her surprise she managed to catch up with him as he was slowed by a laundry basket in the hall that he'd tripped over. Mabel's sliding dive allowed her to pass under the coffee table and grab the remote off the TV before Dipper fell on top of her, having leapt over it.

"I won!" she called out.

He sighed and they both moved to sit on the couch as the rule was they couldn't move off the couch until the movie was over and the twin who hadn't won the remote couldn't touch it.

"Alpha twin!" Mabel cheered and pushed play, starting an anime about beautiful teen boys and romance in colors that violated the viewers' eyeballs.

The VCR stopped and spit out the tape which floated onto the coffee table and was replaced with Masterpiece Theater, much to Mabel's shock. Dipper grinned and she quickly patted him down not finding the stone (hidden in his bellybutton) but finding Dipper's 47 step plan. Taking his pencil she wrote two additions and handed it back to him.

He read 'step 48 let sister watch her show because she loves you' and 'step 49 cuddle on the couch and eat popcorn.'

"You don't fight fair," he grumbled willing the tapes to switch as Mabel went to grab the popcorn. "Bring me some sunglasses!" he yelled.

Typing by: Bankrupt Samurai