Author's Note: Hey everyone! Thank you so much for the reviews and for stopping by and reading. Here goes another chapter, about Gale sharing some of the most painful memories from her past. I know it's all completely fictional, but I've always felt there had to be a deeper reason behind Gale's selfishness and vanity, as well as her obsession with her career. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter. Please review! Your comments make my day. (: Plus if there's anything you think I should improve, just let me know.
I never really planned on telling anyone that story from my past. Frankly, I hardly ever gave it much thought myself, it's been so long. Those memories were almost covered in dust by then. Of course, I was aware it had a huge impact on who I was and the way I interacted and posed myself, but I never allowed myself to get so intimate with anyone that I'd even consider sharing all that with.
Then along came Dewey and my entire world came tumbling down, so I just rushed into his arms eagerly, not caring where I would end up eventually.
I always thought I had it all together, and then it turned out that the only thing I couldn't do without was him.
Still, I had no intentions of going that deep into my past. But how couldn't I? He was so tender, so caring. He was so committed to me, he gave me all of himself. I sensed it, it delighted me. And suddenly I knew all I wanted was do the same for him. To just jump off and let him catch me, as I knew he would.
Besides, he just plain deserved to know why I was such a glory hound bitch. Maybe he was right, and together we could do something about the bleeding mess my heart had turned into.
I gasped and began.
"So… I've always been an unwanted child. My parents never really planned on me coming along; I was more of an accident. A bad one, at that. My dad was a construction worker, always drunk. Mom, an unsuccessful musical actress and a drug addict. I pretty much grew up on the streets; often picked on, but later I learned how to defend myself."
I gave a bitter chuckle. Dewey sat still, stroking my skin. He was so sensitive, so loyal.
"So that was a foreword, pretty much. Life at home sucked, constant fighting and drinking. I was often hit by my father. I hated all of it. I slept with a knife under my pillow, just in case. Didn't stop my daddy from banging me with all his effing might".
I still cringed at that memory. His sweaty palms, the weight of his smelly body, his heart pounding hard against mine. Dewey looked sad, so sad I almost felt bad for telling him, but I knew I had to. Words kept flowing ever so smoothly, while there was a war raging inside of me.
"I was barely twelve at the time. I felt dirty and bloated. He told me it was my fault, that I'd been asking for this. How could I not believe it? I had no one to tell me otherwise. This went on for years. He would molest me under the dining table every freaking day, and made me suck his dick when mother wasn't watching and banged me at every effing opportunity. It was terrible. I felt trapped. Cornered. There was nowhere to turn. I wanted to die! I committed suicide twice, had anorexia, did drugs… The only things keeping me sane were my writing and dreams of being rich and famous."
By then I noticed that Dewey was crying a little bit. I felt bad for making him so upset, but I knew he needed to know. He had the right to.
"Then one day, mother found out. By then she was really messed up. They had another fight, and dad screamed he had so much disgust for her he'd been fucking her little girl and she loved it. He said I was a dirty little slut, and deserved it. Mom beat me up, calling me a whore and accusing me of stealing her man. Oh and I was about sixteen at the time".
Tears were suffocating me, I could hardly breathe. Dewey was wiping them off gently, not saying a word. There was so much love and compassion in his warm brown eyes. I felt miserable and yet triumphant. I never had a clue how bad I needed that story to be brought into the light by the only person I loved and could readily die for.
"I decided to run away to New York after a couple years, to start a career in journalism. I stole some money from my school teacher and did run away. Slept on the streets at first. I was gang raped by a group of stoned skinheads. There were about six of them. They beat me up so severely my body was a bleeding mess. I barely escaped death. I had internal bleeding. I'm most likely barren, actually. I recovered. One of the doctors took me in and helped me enroll in a college where I started my career. I hated all men and sex. I hated all humanity! Then I ended up in Woodsboro, where I met you, Dewey. I can't really explain it, but you did something with me! You were so pure… so kind and generous. I felt safe with you, and that scared me. I was afraid to admit it, but I wanted to just be with you and forget the world".
I smiled a bit. Dewey held me close, still tearing up a little. That was so touching. He still treated me like a pure princess, and that was incredible. I realized at that moment that Dewey was ready to do anything for me. We shared a quiet moment of intimacy, crying about my past. I relished it, until finally he said:
"Gale, my sweetie, I just had no idea… Honey, I'm so sorry. I wish I could've done something, anything… Honey, I…"
Dewey wiped his eyes off and just sat for awhile, totally at loss for words. There I was, the love of his life, the woman of his dreams, telling him some of the most dreadful things he had ever heard. All of a sudden it probably all made sense to him now, my harsh manners, my heartless work policy. I was in his arms now, so thin, so breakable, and he loved me more than he could find words to say he did. I was that little girl now, all of me, and there was no more pretending anymore. He hugged me tightly, covering my entire body with his soft kisses.
"Gale, I love you more than life itself. I'll do all I can, all that's in my power. You'll never be alone anymore. Never in the world will I hurt you. You're now my girl".
I smiled softly, burying my face in his shoulder again. It was warm and soft and promising. Promising love, and peace.
"I know, honey. I've never been so happy. I love you too", I muttered, knowing we would eventually get through anything together. We sat still for a moment until I went on:
"With you, I really do experience… something different. I found all that I needed… I just feel so safe. So loved… That I don't need anything else! That's a little scary, I really don't know how to be good enough for you…"
"Hey, what's that all about?", Dewey asked me softly, "You're perfect to me, the way you are. I don't anyone else… Just my Gale, the way she is.
I smiled courageously.
"Honey, I don't know how I can really help you, but I'll just love you. Darn, Gale, I'll do anything for you".
He was so sweet, so willing to give, so loving. I could only dream about a man like that. Funny as it may sound, it was with him that I first felt desire, and love, and actual fulfillment. I remember Dewey telling me he had lost my virginity with me after the second series of these Stab killings. Well, in a way, so did I. It was my first time when I actually wanted it, and enjoyed it with every fiber of my being. When I was in his arms, I didn't feel the need to perform. I didn't even feel the ache of my wounds anymore.
"I know", I said softly and kissed his lips. They were wet and lush.
He was extra tender and cautious with me that time, his moves slow and gentle. He whispered to me about how dear I was to him, and how grateful he was to me for all this. I fell asleep in his warm arms, with our lips touching
I could not fall asleep that night, even after I felt Gale lightly snoring in my arms.
We had sex that night, and she was warm and soft like clay in my arms. Her smooth silky hair tickled my skin only slightly, and I could feel her breath on my chest. She seemed so innocent then, with vulnerability dripping from her every move.
I couldn't believe what she had told me.
The words she spoke hung in the air, making me dizzy.
How could that be true?
It tore my heart in the most excruciating way.
My Gale. My sweet, crazy, so endearingly selfish, yet incredibly fragile and pristine Gale in the dirty hands of some sick perverted bastard.
I'd get him killed if only the man were still living. I swear I would. That man robbed my girl of so much…
If only I could just make all that pain go away and make her happy all day every day.
There has always been something vulnerable, something lovably breakable about Gale, there is no doubt about that. That was part of her charm, it attracted me to her more. I've always yearned to protect her, to be there for her and love her in the most intimate way. I wanted to know her on the inside. I wanted her to know I would never hurt her. She was completely safe with me.
She quietly moaned in her sleep and rolled over, unconsciously hugging me. I could see Gale trusted me. I would never trade that for the world itself.
Gale was so calm in her sleep, smiling peacefully. I slowly kissed her forehead. I silently hoped she knew I would never ever hurt a single hair on her head.
I stared at the ceiling blankly. My heart ached badly in my chest. Her pain became mine, tearing me down from the inside. I could find no rest. Whenever I closed my eyes, trying to sleep, images filled my mind. Scary, disturbing images of my little girl Gale scared to death, trapped by her merciless father. I groaned, struggling. I love her so much! I'd never allow myself to hurt her!
"Dewey", Gale groaned quietly, "It's all right. You are my shield and shelter now. We'll be fine".
She must have felt I was awake. She reached for my hand underneath the covers and squeezed it tightly.
"Sweetie, I'm just sort of… shocked. It really hurts me to think of you in pain".
"Dew, it's okay now. I'm with you now, for good. It'll all be different, remember?"
"Yes, honey. I'll never let anybody hurt you anymore".
She smiled and yawned sweetly.
"I'm safe with you. I know. Now let's get some sleep, okay?"
She buried her face in my shoulder again and I felt peace at last. As long as we're together, nothing was going to crush us.