Robin puts me on grocery duty now. I don't know why we had to switch house duties…I leave the dishes in the sink for a week and grow a nasty bacteria that makes Starfire sick…big deal. One of these days that vein in his forehead is gonna burst and we're all gonna be out a leader for the team. I think we should wear masks to the funeral, you know, to honor him and stuff; the capes would be too much though…Raven will have to leave hers at home. That might be nice…she's got some pretty fine legs.
I shake my head out of my thoughts about Raven' s shapely legs and look back at the list. Seriously? Six bags of frozen chicken breasts? Gross. This is why I never wanted to do the shopping in the first place. Now I have to supply Cyborg with everything he needs for his meat fetish…meaning I'll have to run by the deli section. I should have cleaned the damned dishes when I had the chance.
Grumpy, I roll the cart down through the aisles. I'll go to the deli last, that way I don't have to deal with the smell of animal flesh for too long. I pick up Starfire's mustard barrel, and I literally mean a barrel of the stuff, the store ships it in just for us. Save the general manager once or twice and you get privileges like that. Then I turn the corner to grab Raven's tea. I can't stop staring at the crazy amount this store has. Man, who knew tea came in so many flavors? With a grunt, I reach for the plain herbal box, that's the stuff she likes, and apparently she thought I forgot that's her favorite, because the word 'herbal' is underlined like three times on the list.
I'm not an idiot; it's the only stuff she ever drinks besides water. Hell, it's all she ever has for breakfast, except when Cy can coerce her into waffles. I glance at the stupid list and the stupid underlined word like I don't know her well enough to know her favorite kind of tea. Hmph. God forbid, she should ever leave her room for anything other than tea and villains. God forbid she shouldn't get exactly what she wants and have to deal with something as horrific as the lemon-ginger tea that sits right next to the herbal stuff.
In a second that I have no idea will impact the rest of my life, I decide to throw back the herbal tea and pretend that I forgot to get it and walk away.
The next day she comes down for breakfast just as I dig into my cereal. I forget that I didn't grab the tea on purpose when she turns around with a glare just for me.
"Where's the tea?" She accuses me, like I've hidden it from her.
At first, I panic. I obviously did not think this through yesterday. Raven's not a morning person, she needs her caffeine, and since Robin's the only one around here who drinks coffee, I'm kinda shit out of luck. So I go to the default of trying to play it cool.
With a shrug I tell her, "I must have forgotten to pick it up."
"How?" Raven walks towards me, and that's scary enough, but at least the lights aren't flickering. That's when I'm really in for it. "I put it on the list."
I'm not dead yet, I might as well keep up the cool act. "I didn't see it on there."
It's kinda funny the way her face screws up when something's confusing her, kinda cute too. She's trying to remember if she did put it on the list, which we both know she did, but I'm not usually one to lie about anything. If I'm caught, I'm caught, and she knows that, so now she's starting to rethink it. Whew, thought I was gonna end-up out the window again. Am I clever or what?
"Well," She clears her throat. Ha! She feels awkward now, "Just make sure you get it next time."
"Okidoki artichokie!" I grin at her before turning my attention back to my cereal. Dude I'm getting away with it!
Soon grocery day comes around again and I remember to get the tea this time. There's no way I can ignore the bolded and underlined TEA that's she practically carved into the list and pretend it wasn't there later. Well, someone's jonesing. But because I'm obviously an idiot, and this time she leaves out 'herbal', I grab the lemon-ginger stuff and throw it into the grocery cart. I'm grinning like a maniac for the rest of the trip.
She materializes out of nowhere the second I start unloading groceries. Damn, I didn't know that going a week without tea would make her act like a crack head. This is hilarious, so I unpack everything really slowly, and intentionally bypass the bag with the tea in it.
"Looking for the tea?" I ask her once I notice that lights are starting to flicker.
"If you wouldn't mind," She's trying really hard to not rip my head off at this point.
I thrust it at her and the flickering stops and her whole body relaxes for a moment…until she notices the type of tea I got her. Her mouth opens to tell me who-knows what, but with a clench of her fist, I can see that she's willing herself not to murder me on the spot. She might actually just be happy enough that I got her tea at all.
"Thank you." She grits out before she vanishes.
The next time Rob hands me the grocery list, I see that HERBAL TEA takes up the first couple inches of the list. Huh, I'm starting to think that she doesn't trust me. I shrug and rip that part off and go about my shopping as if I've never seen it.
"You forgot it?"
This is how I'm going to die. I'm sure of it. Lights are flickering, a couple bulbs have already exploded, and Raven's fingertips are starting to glow. At least I had a good run.
I still have enough time to screw up some more, "You mad?"
Raven looks ready to strike me down when she crosses the kitchen to reach me. For a second her hand raises like it's about to wrap around my neck, but she pulls it back down to her side.
"Why are you doing this to me?" She asks me, "You have to be doing this on purpose."
"I'm too much of an idiot to do anything on purpose Rae." I tell her. Okay, I admit, it's a bit of a stinger every time she says I'm stupid, and this might have been a stupid way at getting back at her, either way, I'm just stupid Beast Boy.
Her face twists like she's confused again. What? I don't have the right to be upset when someone continuously says I'm an idiot? I glare at her and go back to putting away groceries like the light's aren't flickering and breaking all over the place, like she isn't about to rip my head off, like her opinion of me doesn't matter at all.
She grabs my arm and pulls me back to face her.
"What is it you want?"
Gee, maybe for us to be friends. Maybe for you to treat me like I at least have a brain. Maybe I want to see you and talk to you when it isn't about tea or villains. And like the evil genius I am, I come up with an idea on the spot.
"Go to the store with me." I tell her, "I don't like shopping by myself, it's boring. Plus, I'd rather someone else go get Cyborg's meat."
Her eyebrow raises, "This is what this about? You don't want to go the store alone?"
I waggle my eyebrows at her, "If you go with me, I'll be sure to remember to grab your tea."
She lets go of my arm. After a second she does that weird, yet cute sound that's between a snort and a chuckle that she makes whenever she finds something amusing.
"Blackmailing me with tea, clever." She crosses her arms and leans against the counter, "If I help you with the groceries then that means you have to help me with the laundry."
"Help how?" I ask. I don't like the sneaky look that crosses her face.
"Wash all the boys' underwear for me and I'll be glad to go to the store with you." She shrugs.
I give her the once-over. She's really relaxed for someone who was just about to blow the roof off the tower. The way she's leaning on the counter is both smug… And a little sexy. I mean, those legs of hers are, for once, uncovered. Where's her cloak? Hell, where has it been all week? I narrow my eyes.
"This was your plan all along."
She smirks, and I should be piiiiiiiissed that she's played me, but damn, she's earned it. Raven uncrosses her arms and puts her hand back on my arm.
"Guess you're not such an idiot after all." The smirk gets… Smirkier, "Anyone ever tell you that you're kinda cute when you're mad?"
Then she walks away as if she wasn't just flirting with me, or maybe she does, because I see a slight tilt to her hips as she walks. Oh, it is so on. Like the idiot that I am, I run after her.
"Hey! Wait up!"