Shinra Inc. And The Hiring Process
by: Jason Tandro
"Bad news," Reeve said as he sat down beside Rufus in the first floor auditorium.
Rufus, Reno, Rude and Cissnei were currently blasting their way through a deathmatch on the latest Call of Honor of game, and Rufus almost didn't hear Reeve as he was busy shouting instructions.
"Reno, get to cover you're hit. Rude, watch his back! Cissnei, cover me I'm taking the jeep!" Rufus shouted
"On it, boss!" Cissnei replied.
"Unbelievable. You play a video game and suddenly you're a caring, concerned and tactical leader," Reeve sighed.
"Play to win, baby," Rufus replied coolly.
"This is serious, can't you pause it?" Reeve insisted.
"Oh my god, you can't 'pause' an online match, don't you know anything?" Reno retorted.
"The last time you three did this, SOLDIER members broke down the door and you all almost got killed," Reeve reminded.
[Author's Note: See Shinra Inc. And Video Games]
"This time we were smart and scheduled an appointment," Cissnei explained. "Boss man over there covered us."
"This isn't a good use of company time," Reeve groaned rubbing his head.
"Just relax. Five minutes and we'll be done," Rufus replied.
Half an hour later, the four of them finally decided to quit 'while they were ahead', apparently ignoring the fact that they'd lost the last four matches they played, and Rufus turned to Reeve, who had moved down the row a few seats.
"So, you said you had bad news?" Rufus asked.
"Yes. With the recent updates to our policies, Geneva has asked for permission to hire a team to assist her in Legal. She needs at least three attorneys and two clerks," Reeve explained. "The problem is our budget is fully accounted for right now and the expense she's asking for rates at around 2 million gil a year for the full staff."
"Can't we hire from within to cut some of the cost?" Rufus suggested, displaying a presence of mind Reeve had previously thought him incapable.
"I considered that for the clerks. We have a couple who might work, but nobody currently meets the requirements for the attorney positions," Reeve said. "And since this such a high position in the company we will have to be present at all the interviews, if we do find the budget for it."
"That sounds like work," Rufus groaned.
~SI&~ Shinra Inc. And The Hiring Process ~SI&~
The truly amazing part was finding the budget of 2 million gil conveniently stashed away in a small file which was simply labeled "Palmer Living Expenses". Rufus figured Palmer hadn't done an honest days work around Shinra in years, so he just allotted the funds to Geneva. He just tried to ignore how thin Palmer was looking these days. Well, thin compared to how he normally looked.
The interviews were the part Rufus had been dreading, but his role in them seemed to be fairly miniscule. He would simply oversee the proceedings and make sure there were no obvious red flags.
That was, at least, the intended role.
Their first interviewee was a former member of Bosker's community. [Author's Note: See Shinra Inc. And Hippies] He had the necessary legal background, having worked as one of the attorneys for the village. He lacked however an adequate understanding of the phrase "business attire" as he showed up wearing a tie-dyed suit with no tie and no shoes. He also smelled vaguely of hemp.
"So, what is your name?" Geneva asked.
"Raiyn," he replied.
"Raiyn what?" Geneva asked.
"No, dude, it's just Raiyn."
"Can you spell that for me?" Rufus asked.
"R-A-I-Y-N," he replied.
"Okay follow-up question. How much did your parents hate you?" Rufus asked.
"Rufus," Geneva said sharply. She turned back to Raiyn. "You mention you have six years of legal experience. Any notable case work?"
"Well there was the land dispute between Kalm and our settlement before we were properly established. But a group hug solved that problem."
"Are you kidding me?" Rufus asked.
Raiyn turned to Rufus with an unusually serious tone for somebody who was dressed so ridiculously.
"Yeah, I'm fucking with you. I remember your visit to our community. We all have the same good vibes but we're not all as naïve as Bosker, man," Raiyn explained. "Seriously, the case was handled through the appropriate channels as you can see in the portfolio and in my CV."
"We do have a strict dress code here, would you be able to adhere to that?" Reeve asked.
"Your dress code allows for exemptions based on religious and spiritual beliefs. Mine include not being forced to wear shoes. Your company has had two separate suits regarding this and the company lost both of them, so I feel I would be well within my rights," Raiyn replied.
"Right. If we hire you," Reeve replied coolly.
"Oh yeah..." Raiyn nodded.
"To be honest I think he might be over qualified," Geneva said surreptitiously to Rufus.
A few more fairly average contenders came after Raiyn. One was a young woman who couldn't have been much older than 25. She had plenty of education and even a little experience. Rufus was struck by the fact that she was actually dressed like somebody who gave a damn about obtaining the position.
"So Clarissa Williams. I see you've been working as a legal clerk for Harris & Howell in Sector 2."
"Yes, I've really enjoyed it and felt like I've learned a lot from them," Clarissa replied.
"It says here you hold a Bachelor's Degree. But you don't mention what the degree is for," Reeve said. "Was there a specialty involved? Generally we would want a Master's for the top spot anyways, but obviously you are qualified for clerical work."
"Yes, it's a Bachelor's Degree in Liberal Arts."
Geneva raised her eyebrow, but it was Rufus who vocalized any concern.
"Liberal Arts?" Rufus laughed. "You come here looking for a high salary legal position with a Bachelor's in Liberal Arts?"
"Mr. Harris thought it was a sign of my drive," Clarissa explained.
"Clarissa, let me explain something to you, a Liberal Arts Degree is the Participation Certificate of College," Rufus added as snidely as he could manage.
"What college did you go to Rufus?" Reeve asked.
"Not relevant," Rufus replied quietly, shutting his mouth.
Several applicants came and went, and the two day process dragged on with a series of insults from Rufus hurled at anybody not 100% qualified (and even those he gave derisive looks). When the process was all done, the tough part came from trying to find a qualified applicant for each open position.
"But that's really your job isn't it?" Rufus asked.
"Well, I hope I would have the final say, but I wanted your input, Rufus," Geneva replied.
"Input? Is that why I sat through all that mess?" Rufus groaned.
"Did you think you were just there to mock and belittle the applicants?" Geneva asked, shocked.
"Yes," answered Rufus and Reeve in tandem.
"You know, I think Reeve and I will be able to pick a suitable team. You can just go do... whatever it is you do," Geneva sighed.
~SI&~ Shinra Inc. And The Hiring Process ~SI&~
A few days passed and Geneva and Reeve were able to fill out the legal team quite nicely while managing to stay under budget. Reeve went down into the auditorium to find Rufus, Reno and Cissnei once more locked in an epic, and artificial, wartime scenario.
"Hey guys let's pause for a moment," Rufus said, noticing Reeve.
"I though you said you can't pause," Reeve asked.
"Online multiplayer. We're playing the campaign, you can pause that. God, you don't know anything about gaming," Cissnei rolled her eyes.
"Yes, I'm hopeless," Reeve shrugged dismissively. He turned to Rufus. "Just wanted to let you know we've picked out a team, in spite of your helpful suggestions."
"Glad I could be useful," Rufus nodded. "Was that all you had to tell me?"
"Yeah," Reeve sighed, sitting down. "I don't get it. How can you care so little about the people who work for you?"
"Chain of command. They work for Geneva. Geneva works for you. You work for me. I filter out friendships on a two level basis," Rufus explained casually.
"Sure it's not just laziness?" Reeve asked.
"Could be that too. I don't know, I'm too lazy to try and figure it out," Rufus replied. "Wanna join us?"
Reeve shrugged once more and picked up the fourth controller. "Sure, what the hell."