Chapter 6: I thought you were someone else
Loud music was pounding between the light grey walls, cups and bottles were spread out on every flat surface available and every spot you could sit on had been taken by people feverishly making out. It was the classic layout of a teenage house party. Jace was standing by the wall with a cup in his hand. He didn't even know what it was he was drinking. All he knew was that it it burned his throat and almost gave him that buzz he had been looking for. He had barely been talking to anyone all night.
Not only had he gotten to the party only half an hour ago but from the looks of his surroundings he was questioning why he even bothered to show up at all. After his conversation with Clary he had driven straight home with the exception of stopping at a drive through for some dinner. Whilst sitting by his kitchen counter, watching some shitty wannabe Jerry Springer show on the kitchen tv, he'd just dropped the want of going out. He knew there was a chance Clary would show up but how big would it be really? After a about half an hour feeling divided, Jace finally made up his mind when he heard Alec come home with his boyfriend. There had been no chance he would stay at home and be forced to listen to their giggling through the wall.
When he had first arrived to Jordan's place, one and a half hour after it had officially started, he had engaged in a quick conversation with Sebastian before his friend had left him to take the first opportunity to chat up some girl. That had been about thirty minutes ago now and Jace hadn't really been talking to anyone else over that time. Jordan was in the living room "entertaining" his guests and the rest of Jace's team was spread out in the house. No one was trying to approach him. Though in all fairness, he knew he was giving out that "piss off" attitude. Only one or two of his teammates had said a quick hi to him and a cheerleader from New Jersey Hawks' team had tried to flirt with him only to feel embarrassed and practically run away by Jace's lack of response. He probably should have taken the opportunity to be charming, but he just couldn't help it. He felt like an ass. And when he felt like an ass he started to act like one. All night he had been re-playing the night's events in his head. Not the game; the time after the game. He'd been such a douche in front of Clary; to Clary. He knew it was going to set back all the progress the had made with her if he ignored her but he had done it anyways. Why? God, he was such an idiot. In the means of a moment, the second his eyes had met hers' and he had acted like he didn't know her, he had realised just how hard changing would be. He had never actually thought about the idea of showing his interest for Clary in front of his friends, but when he was in the moment, his mind had told him to back off and not talk to her. The look she had given him had made his throat feel twisted and he almost broke the shallow armor right there and then. It had felt like something huge was lying on top of his chest, making it hard to breath. Isabelle had noticed. He just didn't understand why she had to bring Clary down to speak with him. Or why she had to invite her to the party.
Jace's eyes scanned the scene in front of him. Clary was too good for this shit. She was right when she said his word was so much more different from hers. She didn't belong amongst dry humping teenager and underage drinking.
When Jordan had spoken with her, Jace's throat had tightened even further. He'd known Jordan long enough to know when he was flirting. Even if Clary had been completely oblivious to it. Jace took another swing of his cup and emptied the content. He didn't want to think about this. He didn't want to keep seeing the look Clary had given him when he ignored her. He didn't want to be reminded of how her eyes had glued to Jordan's and how he cheeks got rosy when he smiled at her. Jace shook his head. He needed to get out of there. It didn't look like Clary was coming tonight. Not that he was actually expecting it. They had left the night on a fairly good note but he could never really tell with her. He'd screwed up pretty bad and even though he had managed to get her to smile for him and even laugh, he wasn't sure of where he stood. He couldn't keep promising her that he didn't have an agenda for this friendship, only to screw things up the next day. Clary had never been easy to understand as the other girls he'd paid interest in before. If a girl had ever gotten pissed at him in the past for whatever reason, most of the time it was because he wasn't answering their calls, he'd just shrug it off and get on with his life. This wasn't the same.
This was Clary. And Clary wasn't the same.
No. Fuck this. Even hearing to Alec and his boyfriend fool around in the house beat standing alone in a room full of strangers. Only one thing had been on his mind all night and it didn't seem like this setting would change that. Jace placed his empty cup on a corner table and made a move to turn around just as he hear a knocking sound and a quiet whisper. He frowned and turned around, only to see the door he had been standing next to slightly opened. Had that been opened during the time he had been standing there?
"Pst.." A light voice called from inside the room, eliminating any thoughts Jace had about all this perhaps just being his mind playing a trick on him. Who the hell even said pst anymore? With a newly found curiosity he took another step towards the door, carefully peering into the crack to see who was on the other side. For some unknown reason, Jace thought of Clary. Was it her? If she actually had decided on coming, it wouldn't surprise him if she would be hiding in a dark room. Hell, he would have wanted to hid in a dark room as well; and he wouldn't have minded her being in it too. He blinked hard once as if it would make his stupid thoughts go away. Jesus Christ, Jace. Get a grip and just talk to her.
Just as he was about to push the door more open, Jace was grabbed by his shirt and pulled into the room. Stunned by her forwardness and the sudden darkness surrounding him, Jace didn't resist what was happening. As he got past the door, Clary closed it behind him, leaving them completely alone in what Jace believed was Jordan's dad's office. He'd followed her hand's movement and was now turning back towards her.
"Cla…" Jace begun but didn't get further with her name. Two slender hands placed on his jawline and brought him down to her lips.
The kiss. It was hard and direct. Her lips were demanding against his own and for a second he was lost in the dazzle of kissing with Clary Fray. His hands traveled up to her hair but the moment his fingers got in contact with the long, silky strands he snapped out of his illusionary haze. He had been so deep into his thoughts that he'd just been pulled into it and mistook the girl grabbing him for the one on his mind. He pulled away from the girl but the alcohol he'd had during the evening wasn't helping him be settled about it and the girl didn't take the hint but only moved her lips from his down to his throat and started sucking on his exposed skin.
"I knew you still wanted me." He could hear the girl say in a husky low tone that was probably supposed to be seductive. Shit. He knew that voice. Kaelie. Almost every single part of Jace's brain shouted at him to push her away but it was all overshadowed by the teenage hormonal part of him which very much appreciated how this girl's breasts pressed against his chest, her lips at his throat and her hands which were now traveled down to where close to any guy would kill to have a busty blonde touch him. It had been so long since he had been in this position with a girl. Not just because Isabelle made him that bet but he had been so busy with his training lately and the deal with Aline had sometimes meant that he had to pass up on any willing girl just to save his friend from having people finding out she's gay. Jace closed his eyes again but all he could see was the little redhead. It wasn't fair that his mind was occupied with someone else's face. He didn't want her there in his mind, where she had been constantly for the past couple of days. He didn't understand it. How had this small feisty and sarcastic girl with dimples in her cheeks had such an impact on him on such a short amount of time? He didn't like it. He wanted everything to go back to the way it was before he had made that stupid bet with his sister. And for a moment, he did. Kaelie's hands were now working on the zipper of his pants but just as she pulled it down, Jace forced them away and grabbed hold of her hips, spinned the two of them around and lifted the blonde girl up, brought her legs around his waist and carried her towards the office desk he had seen in the corner of his eye. He could hear Kaelie gasp but didn't give her any time to compose herself from his sudden enthusiasm. Not that she really needed it. Jace kissed her hard and Kaelie responded with the same force. Her arms went around his neck and she tightened her legs around his hips, completely clinging herself to him. Jace groaned against her lips. He tried desperately to lose himself in the moment. To let himself just enjoy the feeling of being in between the head cheerleader's legs. Despite the fact that they were both dressed he could feel more than enough to have his body respond the way he had wanted. His pants were halfway undone and Kaelie was wearing a short skirt that had ridden up around her waist from the position she was sitting in. Kaelie proceeded to remove her own shirt but didn't let her hard lips leave Jace's whilst she did it. It didn't feel right. Despite having this girl move her hips against his, making that familiar fire come alive in his lower abdomen, he just couldn't force himself to ignore every part of him that screamed how wrong this was. He just wasn't into it. He just wasn't into her.
"Kaelie.." Jace said after having managed to separate her lips from his. He begun to take a step back from her but Kaelie's legs were wrapped tightly around him and she only saw his reluctance as teasing and smiled. She was done with unbuttoning her blouse and now let it fall behind her, leaving her in only a small bra and her skirt. Jace swallowed and Kaelie's hands went to the hem of his t-shirt to take it off of him. Jace sighed and with more force this time he removed her legs from around him and untangled himself from her grip. With a stronger push he took a few unstable steps back and ran his hand over his mouth, as if he would be able to wipe away the feeling her lips had left there. He quickly moved his hands to button his pants properly against before putting his hand on the door handle with the aim to escape this room that was making his head spin. He didn't know if it was the alcohol that was finally setting, though he felt like he could think clearer than ever, but the air inside the room was too thick for him to be able to breath in. He needed to get out.
"Jace what the hell!" Kaelie called out from behind him. "What's wrong with you?"
Jace just closed his eyes for a brief second before opening the door and walking out. Well outside of the room he took a deep breath whilst trying to have his eyes adjust to the light. It wasn't as if there was a lot of it in the living room but given the fact that the office had been completely pitch black with the exception of the moonlight a window had let in, the change made his eyes sting. He looked around but saw no one he really recognised. Shit. He had to get out of there.
"Jace, can you stop?" Kaelie said, now clearly behind him. Jace sighed and turned around.
"What?" He asked, really not wanting to explain himself. Kaelie stared at him with an angry glare. Her shirt was undone and her lipstick was smeared all over her mouth. He raised his hand and wiped at his own lips, realising he most likely had that bright pink shit all over his face.
"What? Is that all you're gonna say to me?"
"Leave me alone, Kaelie." Jace sighed and made a move to walk away again but the blonde girl wouldn't have any of it.
"You want me to leave me alone? That's not what it seemed like in there."
As if on command, Jace looked at the door the two of them had just walked through. He frowned. No, it hadn't seemed like it. He could feel Kaelie's stare soften and when he looked down at her again her eyes were curved in that way that was supposed to be sexy.
"Baby, you're stressed. Let me help you relax a little." She placed her hands on his chest suggestively. "You know it always works." Leaning forward she got close enough for his lips to almost touch hers. Almost. "You just proved you want me." She whispered. Realisation washed over Jace like a bucket filled with ice water. It had nothing to do with the blonde touching him though.
"I thought you were someone else." he admitted. More to himself rather than Kaelie to be honest but it hit her all the same. She let her hands drop from his chest and took a step back. Her eyes were not filled with both clear anger but also disbelief.
"Jace!" Another voice cut in from behind him, the voice of his sister, but Jace's eyes were still glued to Kaelie's. "Jace!" Isabelle called again, now closer and suddenly he felt his arm being pulled and he was forced to turn towards her. Isabelle stared at him with a furious look on her face.
"Where the hell have you been all night?"
Jace sighed and was about to answer but something adverted Isabelle's eyes and and after a second of silence her face turned into one of realisation and then disgust. Jace followed her eyes and turned around to look at the same person she was, only to find Kaelie buttoning her blouse as if for show. "Oh. Great. Really classy." Isabelle exclaimed and Jace grimarsed.
"Get out of here, will you?" He asked, or rather told, the blonde. Despite Jace's rude tone she gave him a mischievous smile and stretched up to give him a kiss on the cheek, which he clearly didn't appreciate but she didn't seem to care. "Two can play at this game Jace." She said before she turned to walk away as he asked. He slowly turned back to his sister.
"What are you thinking Jace? First you totally diss Clary at the game and now you go off and sleep with Kaelie when she's in the other room? How the fuck are you supposed to explain this to her?" Jace's eyes widened at her words.
"Clary is here? I thought she decided not to come!"
"She's been here for like an hour. If you would have had cared just the slightest then you could have at least looked around for her. Now all she's been doing is downing drinks and being hit on by some guy no one seem to know where he came from but he's definitely not good news for her."
"And you didn't look after her?"
"She's not my project, now is she?"
"You could have fooled me. Where is she."
"I think Jordan was about to take her upstairs." Jace's heart sunk and without another word he stormed past Isabelle and headed for the stairs. As he passed the living room he recognised some of the guys as being from the New Jersey Hawks football team, the losing team. Though he didn't have time to think anything more of that. He rushed up the stairs and headed for the first door he could find. On the other side was a bathroom. Jace swore and tried for the next door. He had never been at Jordan's place other than for parties and wasn't sure of where his bedroom was. The fact that his home was a massive suburban house wasn't helping much either. It was behind the third door that he found them. Jace threw the door open and Jordan quickly snapped his head his way. The dark boy was hunching over Clary's small, sleeping form, putting her down on the bed beneath him.
"Jordan, what the fuck are you doing?" He almost shouted frozen in his position by the door. Jordan turned towards him with a surprised look on his face which quickly turned to one of slight anger and defense.
"She's about to pass out. She's had too much. I took her up here before any of the Hawks put their hands on her." He said. Jace made his way into the room and around the bed as he got to Clary's side he pushed Jordan to the side and hunched down by the bed.
"You let them come into your house?"
"Well it's not as if I have a fucking doorman." Jordan said, biting back on Jace's words.
"What did you do to her?" Jace said, his eyes stuck at Clary's trying to see if she had any visible harms or if she seemed out of it any other reason than just alcohol.
"What the hell kind of a question is that, Herondale? She's the coach's daughter!" Jordan yelled in defense. "Some guy was hitting on her, leaning a bit too close for someone in her state so I told him to fuck off and then I took her upstairs. To sleep." Jace turned his head up to look at his teammate and instantly felt regret. This was Jordan. They've known each other since they started this school. Besides Sebastian he was his closest team player and friend. Of course he would never force himself on a girl. Jace knew that.
"Jace…" Jace quickly turned to Clary who had just spoken in a small and uncertain voice. Her eyes were half closed but he could see the piercing green stare at him from between her heavy eyelids.
"Hey." He said softly. Without thinking of anything he placed his hand on her cheek and leaned closer to her. "How are you feeling Clary?" He asked.
A frown formed on her forehead and she slowly lifted her hand to Jace's forearm and grabbed hold of it. She didn't move it though. Almost as if she didn't want him to slip away again.
"You weren't at the party." Clary said slowly. A pang of guilt formed in Jace's throat as a lump. He turned to Jordan by his side.
"Sorry. Thanks for helping her. I'll just take it from here." He said, his voice far more calmed down. It wasn't Jordan's fault he hadn't been there for Clary.
Jordan just nodded and got up and excited the room, though as he got to the door he turned around and looked at Jace as he sat by Clary's side with a worried look on his face.
"What is she to you, mate?" He asked. Jace turned around.
"What do you mean?"
"I've known you for a while now and I've never seen you act like that to anyone apart from Izzy."
Jace sighed, shook his head and adverted his eyes away from his friend back to Clary's almost sleeping face. He could hear Jordan mumble 'alright' before leaving and closing the door almost all the way shut on his way. The music from the floor underneath them was still audible but not enough for Jace to not hear Clary's calm breaths. He didn't know what to say. Or what to do. The guilt of not having found her was seiping through him. He started to remove his hand, unsure of what to do, when Clary opened her eyes again and a frown appeared on her face. Jace swallowed against the thick sensation in his throat. Clary let her hand go of his forearm and proceeded to sit up, something that proved to be a lot harder than it should have been. As she tried to sit up straight but only managing to sit hunched with her upper body swaying unstable, Jace placed his hands on her shoulders to steady her. Now it was his turn to frown.
"Clary, how much have you been drinking?" He asked cautiously. She shook her head slightly. Her eyes were almost closed and glued to Jace's collarbone, as if in case she looked anywhere else she would fall over onto her back again.
"Just one." She said quietly. Jace's heart dropped.
"Just one drink?"
"Yeah. Just one."
"Was anyone refilling your cup? Putting more alcohol in it?"
Jace swallowed a new sort of pit formed in his throat; but this kind wasn't directed towards Clary. Sure Clary was small and most likely couldn't handle a lot of alcohol but one drink shouldn't have gotten her in the state she was in. Someone must have put something in her drink. He cursed under his breath. This was all his fault. If he hadn't been such a dick and assumed she wouldn't come he could have found her and prevented this. Hell. He could at least have asked around for her.
"Jace… I don't feel so good." Clary said, her voice now a bit more stable.
"I'll get you home Clary." He didn't quite know how to do it since he'd been drinking too and was probably not in any condition to drive, but he definitely needed to make sure she got home okay. Jace said whilst raising his hand and without thinking, stroked her hair back to reveal her face. Clary finally moved her eyes from his collarbone to his eyes. The look on her face was careful. Jace almost had to fight not to look away from her, he felt too bad.
"You have golden eyes." Clary said. It was such a random thing to say that he almost cracked a smile.
"Yeah. I do."
"I like your eyes." Clary said, still not looking away. "I like you." She then added. Jace swallowed. "I know I shouldn't. Because you're the way you are and I am the way I am. And I would never actually tell you that I liked you. But I do." Clearly she was completely unaware of what she was saying but none the less it made Jace's heart speed up like crazy. He swallowed again, though by this time his mouth was so dry that it was hard. He didn't know what to say. One thing was sure and that was that she wouldn't remember this by the morning.
"I like Isabelle too. She's nice too." Clary then added. Oh, she meant it like that. A massive feeling of disappointment filled his chest and he had to momentarily look away from her eyes not to reveal anything to her. Friends was good. He told himself. It's great actually. It's only been a week and she already liked him. No matter the fact that he had fucked up with her twice now. He should be happy with friends. But somehow he wasn't.
"Come on Clary. Let's get you home."
"What the hell?" Simon exclaimed after having opened the door to find Jace standing with his arms around an almost sleeping Clary who had her face pressed into his neck and her arms thrown around it. It had taken Jace half an hour to get Clary to Simon Lewis apartment which was surprisingly only a few kilometers away from Jordan's house. Most of that time had been spend on Jace trying to get Clary to agree to be taken home. When Jace had gotten her down the stairs and outside the house, Clary had sobered up enough to realise how much trouble she would be in if she would come home in the state she was in. She had refused to take another step and when Jace threatened to carry her to his car, she had clinged herself to one of the wooden poles holding the roof up on the front terrace. Jace would have been annoyed if it wasn't for the fact that she had looked so goddamned cute holding on with a grumpy face as if her life depended on it. After some time of light arguing, Clary had suggested he'd take her to Lewis' place. Apparently she knew his mum wouldn't be at home. She had given him the address which she knew by heart, even in the state she was in, and finally agreed to let Jace take her to his car. He knew he shouldn't have been driving but he needed to get her somewhere else than the party where someone had drugged her. Besides, the event of finding her had sobered him up a lot and he had been driving so slow pensioners could have past them. Now they were standing there. In front of a wide eyed, star-wars-pajama-pants-wearing Simon Lewis.
"What the hell did you do to her?" The brunette exclaimed.
Before Jace could explain, Clary lifted her head from his neck and looked at her friend with sleepy eyes.
"Simon. Please don't be mad." She said with a small voice. Her hands slipped from Jace's neck and she took an unsteady step towards Simon. Forcing Jace to let go of her waist as she stumbled into the arms of the brunette instead of the blonde. Jace couldn't help but feeling a bit annoyed at how much more comfortable and natural she looked in Simon's arms. He supposed it made sense but it still stung a bit. Especially when all Simon did was sigh and look displeased. It also didn't make things better when he suddenly leaned down and scooped Clary up in his arms bridal style. Simon was skinny but clearly strong enough to lift a girl up as if it was nothing. Then again, Clary is very tiny and he doubted she weigh much.
After giving Jace a glare, Simon turned around and walked into the apartment with Clary in his arms, leaving Jace standing in the doorway alone. He weighed his options for a few seconds, considering whether he should follow the two into the flat or just take off. He decided on the first, walked in and closed the door. The apartment was very small. The door had lead straight into the living room which was linked to a very small kitchen. It might be Jace's odd perspective coming from a massive house with three spare bedrooms, but this place was tiny. The tv was on with some film showing and an old laptop was placed by the sofa table. Next to it was three energy drinks and a bag of chips. What an epic night… The room was rather blank with close to no color in it apart from one A4 painting which stood out. Jace walked closer to look at it, trying to keep himself occupied as he felt rather uncomfortable in this place. The painting was like a splash of colors but when looking more carefully he could see that it made out two people. One with dark curly hair and one with red. He'd seen that style before. Clary must have drawn that. He looked at the corner of the painting and as he thought, Garroway-Fray was scribbled in black ink. Once again a small feeling of jealousy filled him but it was overshadowed by admiration for Clary's painting skills.
"You're still here?" Jace turned around to face Simon who was now out of the room and was staring at him with a disapproving look. Jace scoffed.
"You really don't know how to treat guests, do you?"
"I wouldn't call you a guest as much as a trespasser."
"Ouch…You hurt me." Jace placed a hand over his heart and frowned. Simon just stared at him unamused.
"What did you do to Clary?"
Jace sighed. "I didn't do anything. I found her like that."
"As if I'd believe that." Simon said, louder this time. As if he was trying not to lose his temper. "I don't give a shit if you believe me or not. I only brought her here because she refused to go home and see her parents." Jace barked back. For a moment the two boys just stared angrily at each other. Jace would be damned if he let this guy get to his head but it was just something about him he instantly hated. He didn't know if it was his annoying attitude or the way he was with Clary, but he just didn't like him. After a while Simon took a step back, eyeing Jace up and down and then turning to walk into the kitchen.
"I'm not gonna say thank you for bringing her here because I'm still convinced you're the one who got her to that state." He spoke whilst taking a glas out of the cupboard and filling it with water. At least the kid seemed to know how to prevent a hangover. Though Jace doubted there was no amount of water in the world that would save Clary from the headache she would feel tomorrow. "But I'll take care of her from here. You can leave now."
He knew she was fine now. Well, maybe not fine but she wasn't exposed anymore and this kid was probably right when he said he'd care for her. Though something in Jace just made him want to make sure she was alright. So that's what he did. Ignoring Simon calling out "Hey", he quickly walked into the room Clary had been brought in to. She was lying on her side, curled up with her hair tied in a bun, still wearing her jeans but now in a large t-shirt instead of the top she had been wearing during the night. Jace walked around the bed, careful not to wake her. Though as he got around he saw that even though she was lying with her head resting on her arm, her eyes were opened and looking at him.
"Hi." Jace said quietly. Clary didn't say anything back but a small smile curved at her mouth. She seemed more sober now oddly enough. Jace carefully kneed down by the top of the bed to be more in eyelevel with her.
"I'm sorry about tonight, Clary." He said, still whispering. "I really am."
"You say you're sorry too much, Jace." She answered. Her voice was more stable than it had been just minutes earlier but she still seemed to be quite gone.
Jace let out a breathless laugh. "That's because I have too much to be sorry for."
Clary just looked at him with a small smile. She looked at him as she could see right through him and it made Jace want to run away and hide. Though, as usual, he couldn't look away. Despite all the shit she had to experience around him, she didn't look at him as if she blamed him at all.
After a few more seconds he cleared his throat. "I should go before your scrawny friend attempts to kick me out of here."
Clary grinned and nodded slightly. "Good night, Jace."
"Sweet dreams, Clary."
I won't bore you with an AN this time. Please Review!