I do not own Harry potter nor do I own the Addams Family
The Next morning Severus walked down the grand stair case to find Wednesday bound to a chair, gagged with a white rag and struggling violently. "Morning." The child looked up at him and scowled. Pugsley was opening a dirty tool box that contained all of his poisons and chemicals, and pondered which would suit him best that morning.
"Morning Pugsley." He nodded, the rotund boy turned and smiled, "Uncle Severus, which one do you think?" Pugsley held a bottle of Arsenic and a bottle of Cyanide. "Hmm, potions is really my cup of tea, why don't you ask your Uncle Fester." The boy nodded and rushed into the other room to seek his Uncle's advice while Severus fumbled in his pocket and pulled out a sleek silver pocket knife.
"Here" he unfolded it and wedged it on her tiny pale hands, "You should have about ten seconds before your brother gets back and If you want a professional's advice, aim for the back of the ankles." Wednesday grunted as a form of thank you and began to saw away at the rope.
Snape walked down the hall and paused when he heard the shattering of glass and an indignant "Hey! No fair!"
Severus strolled into the Kitchen where he found Grandmother Addams and Morticia seated at the table. "His trains are everywhere." Morticia confided in her grandmother-in-law, Severus took a seat beside his sister. "The children are beside themselves." At the moment Wednesday walked through the kitchen welding a large kitchen knife.
"Is that for your brother?" Morticia stopped her, Wednesday nodded solemnly. "I don't think so" Morticia held out her hand and Wednesday relinquished her weapon and took up what looked like a ridiculously large cleaver on a wooden handle. Severus stopped her by the shoulder and leaned over, "Remember, back of the ankles." They nodded in agreement and Wednesday returned to her quest.
"This can't go on!" Morticia stated, "How can I help him, tell me mama!"
The old witch opened a dusty, ragged book with a cloth cover, "Troubled husbands" she muttered and flipped through the paged. "Um, Adultery?" she asked. "Oh no." Morticia shook her head, "Uh, Financials? Money troubles?" the witch flipped to the next page.
"No" Morticia shook her head, the witch muttered again and flipped to a new chapter, "Turned into Newt or Reptile?" Morticia sigh with agitation, "Is there an index?"
Wednesday walked into the kitchen with the large weapon and grabbed a stone and began to run it along the blade. "Back of the ankles?" Severus asked. She shook her small head, "He moved, hit the back of the knees"
"Atta girl" Grandmother cackled and clapped, "Chip off the old block"
"Wednesday?" Morticia cooed, "Isn't there something your uncle promised to do…" the cast a sly eye at her brother, who glared silently and sighed them silently mouthed "fine". He stood with a grunt. "Well, come along then."
Wednesday tailed her uncle, looking up at him the whole time, "It's impolite to stare." He muttered and opened the door, "What you want to know?"
Wednesday perched herself on the hard bed, "Mother says you're the best potions master there is, it that true?"
"I'm afraid your mother's opinion is a bit biased" the professor sat himself in a chair, "Can you make a truth potion?" she persisted. The wizard paused, "I can brew veritaserum yes."
"and it works…?"
"Yes, it does work" he said slowly, wondering where she was going with this. "you never answered my question." She changed the subject, "Why haven't I ever met you before now?"
"You're too young to know." Severus said quickly, in the back on his mind he felt pressure and quickly blocked it out, and for a split second allowed his face to betray his shock, this little girl, not even enrolled in magic school yet, just tried to get inside his mind.
"Wednesday, I will answer any questions I feel it is proper for you to know the answer to, but I will not tolerate you attempting to read my mind is that clear?" he said firmly, his niece nodded slowly but did not look sorry in the least. He still couldn't get over the fact that someone so young could know what Legilimency was, let allow attempt it.
"Where did you learn that?" he asked. "Mother taught me." Severus nodded understandingly, "Can you teach me?" She asked suddenly.
"Teach you what?"
"How to brew Veritaserum?" She pressed, "I imagine it's incredibly useful." Now Severus didn't usually quibble with morals, but teaching a nine year old how to brew a powerful truth potion is a tad far even for him. "How about we start with something a bit simpler? Say….a shrinking potion?" Wednesday shrugged, slightly disappointed but nodded with agreement.
"Alright, I imagine you mother still has some potions books stored away somewhere." He stood, "And assuming she hasn't changed in the past nine years, she probably keeps them in the main library, a single shelf, in a shadowy corner with a single halfway melted candle."
Wednesday widened her eyes, how in God's name did he know so much?
"Your memory is impeccable." A soft, feminine voice floated through the door way. "but for your information I replaced the candle just last night, and it's two shelves now." Morticia corrected him. "my mistake." Her brother rolled his eyes.
"Wednesday, why don't you head to the library, I have to ask your mother something." The child walked out silently, only walked down the hall before turning into the next room and pressed her ear to the wall.
"Now Tish I'm not going to tell you how to raise your children, but don't you think It's a tad mush to teach a nine year old how to invade someone's mind?" Severus began, Morticia rolled her eyes in a sort of way that said, 'oh here we go'.
"Wednesday is plenty capable of handling it,"
"I don't doubt that, but some things come with age and incidentally Legilimency is one of those things." He protested, "and I think Wednesday is questioning Fester's authenticity as well, she asked me to teach her how to make Veritaserum."
"Oh dear" Morticia said in the least concerned of voices, "Well, she's not the only one, Gomez it nearly out of his mind, he refused to leave our room."
"Do you want me to talk to him?"
"No, Dr. Pinder-shloss is coming tonight, but I want you to be there as an impartial third party." Morticia, "I'll see what I can do, but I have to back at the school by tomorrow night."
They nodded, "I'll see to Wednesday then." He muttered, the child gasped and crept down the hallway a quickly as she could and arrived in the library just seconds before her uncle. "What did you and Mother talk about?" she asked in a bored tone, "Nothing, adult things." He brushed her off, "Now, shrinking potion…" he ran his finger of the bindings of the books, all old, all dusty, and with stories to tell.
By the time night fell, Wednesday had mastered the shrinking potion, essence of energy, instant smoke, and a sleeping potion.
"Why don't you speak to Fester darling? He's right outside the door." Morticia asked Gomez, Severus leaned over the back of the couch Morticia and her husband sat at, and the german woman sat in an armchair across from them.
"I would speak to Fester, if there were fester! But that is NOT Fester! That is an imposter!" He stormed about the room and stomped out to the wood door and yelled through it, "An Impostere!"
"A Charlatan, a sham, a counterfeit!"
The three listened to Gomez carry one incessantly, "Should we stop him?" Severus whispered in his sister's ear, "No, no, let his get it all out." She tutted.
"A faker! And phony, an utter fraud, a base deceitful…!"
"Mr. Addams!" the doctor finally stopped him, "I believe I am understanding, I can help jes?"
Gomez returned to his spot beside his wife and waited, "The theory of Displacement…" the doctor began, "this this familiar?" the three looked at each other, "No, Tish?" Morticia shook her head and looked up at her older brother, "Severus?"
The teacher shook his head. "Oh it is too exciting I will explain."
"Is it unpleasant?" Gomez asked eagerly, the doctor shook her head, "Deeply."
"You drive your own brother away, go, off with you." She began, "But then you are feeling the little black monster."
"Pugsley?" Severus asked, "Guilt!" the doctor correct. "Your brother returns, and you feel guilt, and you displace."
"I do?" Gomez asked. "Jes."
"The feelings in your brain, they buddle and collide." She motioned with her hands, "You suspect things, you love him but you resent him." She shrugged, "Love hate, hate love, like with mama no?"
Gomez looked defensive, "But I didn't hate my mother it was an accident."
'There's a story I don't want to hear.' Severus thought. "It's a very common psychosis, I am seeing it every day."
"Lucky Doctor." Morticia noted.
"Displacement, how bizarre." Gomez muttered, "And here I thought Fester was the problem."
"He's sullen," Morticia began.
"Backstabbing." Gomez continued
"He sulks" Severus put in.
"I suspect him." Gomez nodded.
"You're unbalanced" Morticia noted.
"And I hate him!" Gomez grinned, "By god! He is Fester!"
"Thank you Doctor Pindershloss" Mortica gushed the German shrugged, "I do what I can"
"What do you say Severus?" Gomez chuckled, "He's your brother." The teacher shrugged, "I'd like to think that Tish would be able to tell the difference between me and an imposter."
He glanced at the clock, "I should go, I still have things to prepare before the school year starts."
"Well It's always a joy seeing you old man, you'll be coming to the children's fall showcase Wednesday, of course." Severus shuttered, School children's class productions where one of his least favorite things, right between quidditch and stabbing himself in the eye with a hot poker.
"I'll see what I can do." He muttered, "That's the spirit old man!" the husband clapped him brother in law on the back roughly. "It'll be just like old time!"
Severus nodded, and rubbed his shoulder blade, "Yep, hurt back then to."