Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha. I am merely borrowing the characters for a little while, and I promise to return them as soon as I have finished playing with them ^_^
The dreams started slowly at first, just flashing images too indistinct to comprehend accompanied by a swirl of faintly perceived desire. Always after the initial confusion the scene would refine gradually to an image of Inuyasha. He would seem larger than life, his silver hair flying in the wind and his eyes wild and fierce. She would be riding his back, a tiny and insignificant figure compared to the larger than life half demon. They would fly through the air with such speed and freedom that made Kagome gasp for breath and make her heart pound with barely suppressed excitement.
In her dream he would always turn his head slightly and look at her. He wouldn't smile, but she could see such amusement reflected in his eyes that he did not have to. And amusement was not the only emotion glowing in his golden orbs; there was hunger too. As he ran, his hands would tighten around her thighs and he would hold her pelvis close to him. She would grasp his shoulders and press her chest up against his back aware of curious sensations that would start to flow through her body as she rubbed herself on his skin. She would hear him growl slightly and feel the rumble tickle her breasts.
And then, invariably, she would wake up. Her heart pounding in her chest, her breathing rapid, her head sweaty. She would be bathed in a curious feeling of loss that would make her want to wrap herself up in her blankets and return to the glorious sensations of her dream world.
Reality was always so depressing after a dream like that. In real life the only time that Inuyasha would hold her firmly to his body was when they were avoiding an attack from a demon. If he growled it would be in anger, not desire. Most times when Kagome traveled on his back he had no need to hold her close. She had no difficulty balancing on his back as he ran and jumped with a natural rhythm, and her meager added weight did nothing to impede his speed.
After the dreams started Kagome found that this disappointed her a little, but she was always careful in his presence to try and shield her emotions of need and desire. Kagome knew that his nose made up for whatever he lacked in social skills. She was certain that he would be able to sniff out her overwhelming desire if she was not very careful. So when she rode his back in real life she would think of her problems; rapidly dropping grades at school, the rumour that she was a hypochondriac (thanks Grandpa), and the biggest desire curbing thought of all - Inuyasha with Kikyou.
The pair of them embraced tightly, kissing.
That thought always made her feel mind numbing fear. Kagome was certain that she would never be able to rid herself of the image of Kikyou embracing Inuyasha, pulling him down to hell in her tight embrace. Kagome knew that she was here to counterbalance Kikyou's deadly needs with that of her own determination to share her life with Inuyasha. It was just up to Inuyasha to decide which fate he wanted.
And so whenever she was in the past Kagome was able to suppress her dreams so they remained secret from Inuyasha. However, whenever Kagome went back to the modern world on her own she allowed herself the luxury of thinking about Inuyasha in *that* way. She would relish the dream when it came, luxuriating in the recalled sensation of his back rubbing against her groin, his growls and hooded looks from golden eyes.
Kagome was not especially surprised when her dreams progressed to a new level of desire. The dream would start the same, flying through the air her body pressed hard against his and her being able to feel the play of his muscles even through his robes. And then the robes would disappear. Startled, her hands that had been grasping his shoulders tightly would loose their grip and her body would arch back as she lost her balance. But then as she was about to fall, Inuyasha would reach back and grasp her arm pulling her to him, spinning around as he did so that he now faced her. Instead of being pressed against his back, she was would now be held tightly on his front.
She would be naked, her own clothes having disappeared (or was she naked throughout the dream, she could never be sure). Their headlong flight interrupted, they would stand quite still embracing each other before Inuyasha would bend his head to her neck and gently nuzzle her. Her own head would tip backwards and she would groan at the delicious sensations his mouth was causing her, all the time rubbing herself against his body. The sensations from that point on would always overwhelm her. She knew that she would be calling Inuyasha's name in the dream as a feeling of coiling tightness would start to wind in her abdomen, getting tighter until it would bloom into a feeling of warmth and breathlessness.
Whilst she was in her own time, the dreams would swarm up and overwhelm her night after night leaving her tired, drawn and depressed yearning after what would never be. As time went by the dreams increased in intensity making Kagome think that she was almost being punished for suppressing them when she was in the past with Inuyasha.
* * *
Kagome was late returning to the past and Inuyasha had decided it was time to collect her. Her continual returning to her own era irritated him. The excuses of tests seemed to come up far too frequently for his liking and he was beginning to wonder if these more and more frequent departures were because Kagome no longer wanted to be with him...and the others, of course.
As he jumped down the well floating through time he smiled in anticipation of seeing her. He would never admit it to her, but he missed her presence when she returned to her home. He missed her kindness, he missed their arguments, and he missed her scent. His world always seemed oddly lacking when her scent was not flavouring the air.
He quickly hid his smile as he arrived in the future. He would not admit that he missed her though. To her he would show her only scowls of irritation at having being forced to find her. Sniffing the air he smelt her nearby, she was not giving off any emotions - she smelt like she was sleeping. His scowl deepened at the thought of her sleeping the day away rather than returning and helping to look for the shards.
Inuyasha sniffed the air again before making his way from the well house to her house. No one was around the shrine. He leapt up to her windowsill, and quietly slid open the window, peering into the sun filled room. Kagome was on the bed, lying on her side. Her hair spilled across the pillow, her eyes closed and her breathing deep and regular. Inuyasha jumped silently down onto the floor beside her bed, crouched and sniffed. There was an odd scent in the room beside that of Kagome, he couldn't quite identify it but he thought that there was a scent of malice to it. He frowned, considering. It wasn't demon, nor was it mononoke.
He frowned as he focused on the nearly complete jewel that hung around Kagome's neck. The jewel was a magnet for all things evil and he wondered if it was drawing some type of demon that he had no knowledge of to it and to Kagome. He reached out a clawed finger as he mused, absently touching the jewel.
Kagome moaned. Inuyasha froze, his hand outstretched to her neck. His eyes rose from the necklace to Kagome's face. The girl turned her head on the pillow mumbling a little, words that had no meaning to Inuyasha before arching her back a little and moaning again. Inuyasha sniffed. The foreign smell had increased as Kagome became more restless, but then Kagome's own scent had also intensified. Inuyasha dipped his head closer to her sniffing her intoxicating smell. There was something primordial and instinctive about it that made his breathing become more rapid and fill him with an urge to taste her skin. As he moved closer yet, his clawed fingers brushed against Kagome's neck. Her eyes opened a fraction, before springing open wide and startled as she saw Inuyasha bending close over her, his skin only inches away from her.
"Ah! Pervert!" she cried out, pushing him away with both hands.
Inuyasha, startled by her sudden wakening, his head muzzy with her scent, rocked backwards and fell off the bed his hands clamping over his ears in an effort to protect his sensitive hearing from her sudden scream. Kagome sat up and peered over the bed to see Inuyasha wincing and looking back up at her with angry eyes. She rubbed her eyes in an effort to dispel the sleep from them and then focused on Inuyasha again.
"What are you doing here?" she demanded "What were you doing?"
Inuyasha gingerly took his hands from his ears and with as much dignity as he could narrowed his eyes and growled at her, ears flattened and nose sniffing. The weird smell had disappeared, replaced with a smell of surprise tinged with a faint whiff of guilt from Kagome. Inuyasha moved a little closer to her, whilst she grabbed the sheet and pulled it closer to her body.
"You are dressed." Inuyasha commented as he reached out a clawed hand and pulled it away from her, "Why are you sleeping when you should have been with us hours ago?" His eyes narrowed as he looked at her face closely, noticing for the first time that her eyes were dark and shadowy, and that she was looking wan and thin. "Are you ill?" He asked reaching his hand up to touch her face and assess her temperature.
Kagome, however, was having nothing to do with this. She swatted his hand away and slid out of bed, her face red with embarrassment. She had been dreaming her favourite dream about him, riding on his back and delighting in the sensations it caused between her legs. She had woken up suddenly feeling the disorientation that came with the dream and found Inuyasha's face close to hers and him sniffing. She was mortified. She knew how sensitive his nose was, what if he smelt her desire? She ran out of her room to the bathroom, locking the door and turning on the shower. She knew she had to wash the scent of her desire away from her body before she could look Inuyasha in the face again.
Inuyasha watched her departure, scowling until she had shut the door and locked it. He sat back on his haunches and allowed the confusion to show on his face. Kagome never slept during the day, unless she was injured. Her time in the modern world was too precious to let her sleep it away, he knew because he had followed her through the well on many occasions just to watch her and make sure that she was safe. She would sit at her desk late and night reading from books and making notes, her face frowning in concentration or irritation, Inuyasha was never sure which it was. When she finally closed the books she would fiddle with her alarm clock and have a few hours sleep before she was up and studying again.
To find her asleep in the middle of the day, with no books around opened or closed made Inuyasha feel uncomfortable. Kagome was looking tired and thin and Inuyasha was angry with himself that he had not noticed this earlier. In his time she always seemed so energetic, yet after coming back to her own time for a couple of days she seemed drained.
Inuyasha sniffed the air again, his eyes closed. He liked the smell of Kagome, it was warm and reassuring. The dark smell had gone, no residue remained so that Inuyasha thought that he had perhaps imagined it. He sat on the bed waiting for her return, his hands pressed into the warmth of the mattress where she had lain. He resisted the urge to press his face into the space where she had so recently been, trying to ignore the dizzy need that her scent created in him.
The bathroom door opening announced to him that Kagome was returning. Inuyasha guiltily rose to his feet moving away from the bed. He did not want to have her scream 'pervert' at him again, especially as he was actually feeling like a pervert. The delicious want to roll himself up in her sheets and cover himself with her scent remained so strong within him. As much as he wanted and needed her, he could not declare himself to her until he had defeated Naraku and succeeded in giving Kikyou the rest that she deserved.
Kagome strode into the bedroom, her hair wrapped up in a towel around her head, and a towel around her body. Inuyasha's eyes widened as he saw her, looking almost fragile wrapped in fluffy whiteness. He had seen her naked before, glimpses which had been etched in his mind for precious recollection when alone. But then she had been rounded, almost voluptuous. Today he could see that her bones were prominent, and her skin was a sallow colour. She did not look well and had obviously not been well for some time. He felt angry at not noticing before and a growl formed in his throat. He turned and opened the window, and leapt out, running silently to the well house where he crouched waiting for her to dress and follow.
* * * *
Kagome clutched the towel close to herself when Inuyasha growled in anger, and bowed her head as he fled the room. A small tear leaked from the corner of her eye as she watched him run away. Of course he ran, she thought to herself. She had waltzed into her room in all but a state of undress, her head still muzzy with dreams of Inuyasha slowly undressing her. He did not want that from her, he had made that clear when he growled in anger at her. Her desire would forever be imprisoned in furtive dreams. She wiped the tear away angrily. The sooner she realized that, the happier she would be.
And deep within her, a dark presence shielded by her strong aura stirred and wrapped itself closer around her desire, feeding from the bittersweet thoughts and growing stronger.
* * * *
The walk back to the village had been a silent one, Kagome was too embarrassed and despondent about her rejection to say anything, and Inuyasha too angry at himself for not noticing that she was steadily fading away to talk. He had taken her bag from her, hoisting it over his own shoulder before the jump down the well, and had carried her out of it rather than let her scramble up as she usually did. His anger had mounted as he pressed her close to his side, feeling her ribs through her baggy school uniform.
As soon as they had returned, Inuyasha had stated rummaging through Kagome's pack, whilst Kagome knelt listlessly by the fire in the little hut that had been built for their use when they visited the village. Kagome studied the flames, uneasy with the silence between them and not wishing to look at his face. She sighed a little, feeling the tiredness that always came from a visit to her time wash over her. Battling demons was one thing, but trying to keep her grades up at school was entirely more exhausting, especially when she slept so badly. Her eyes grew dry from staring at the flames and she allowed them to half close. At least she would sleep well tonight, her subconscious banishing the tempting dreams in the presence of Inuyasha. And then, tomorrow when she was more rested she would be better able to put a brave face on Inuyasha's rejection and things would return back to normal.
A pot of instant ramen thrust under her nose made her sit back startled. A grim faced Inuyasha held it out in his clawed hand.
"Eat" he growled.
Kagome shook her head a little "I'm not hungry, you have it. I bought it for you." she said, her eyes sliding back down to the fire ignoring his scowl. She could not, however, ignore his hand catching her own and wrapping it around the warm plastic pot.
"Eat." he said, "You are no use to me if you have no energy to find the shards." He pulled his hand away leaving her holding the pot, looking in surprise at her suddenly suspiciously moist eyes, before narrowing his own. "What?" he demanded.
Kagome cradled the pot in both hands, head lowered so that her hair hid her face from his eyes. She blinked her eyes rapidly trying to clear the tears that had sprung there at his words. *She was no use to him if she couldn't find shards* It was just confirmation of what she already knew, but hearing them from his lips made any hope she had for him to be hers disappear. She sighed again, irritated that she could feel so depressed, so unwanted and knowing that it was linked in some small way to her general tiredness. But it also hurt.
"Nothing" she whispered, and forced herself to start eating.
"Feh!" Inuyasha stood up suddenly and strode to the door "I am going to sleep outside." he said and left in a flash of red and silver.
Kagome remained sitting on her knees, chopsticks holding ramen at her mouth for a minute before letting it fall back into the cup and placing it on the floor beside her. She couldn't eat, she was too tired to eat, too depressed, too unhappy. She lay down on her side beside the small cooking fire too tired and exhausted even to roll out the sleeping mat.
Tomorrow would be better she thought as she stared at the flames. Just one night without dreams of Inuyasha haunting her and she would be better. She closed her eyes and was asleep almost immediately.
Inuyasha had not gone far. As soon as he had made a show of leaving the hut, he doubled back and peeped back through the doorway. He watched with irritation as Kagome slowly placed the still full cup of ramen beside her and huddled by the fire, her eyes shutting and her breathing becoming deep and regular. When he was sure she was asleep, he slipped back into the room and crouched beside her observing her closely. 'Stupid girl' he thought with irritation, smoothing a strand of hair away from her face, lifting it and sniffing it gently working past the faintly metallic chemical smell of the shampoo that she used and luxuriating in the scent of her. He could not work out why she was so tired after her trips to her world.
* * * *
The morning was bright and sunny and Kagome began to feel almost happy as she rode on Inuyasha's back, speeding through the forest to rejoin Sango and Miroku. She smiled as she wound her fingers into the fabric of Inuyasha's robe and felt the tickling of his hair on her face and neck as it streamed back in the wind. It felt warm and comforting, and more than a little sensual. She couldn't help herself as she lifted a hand to undo her top button of her blouse to expose more skin to the caresses of Inuyasha's silver hair.
Inuyasha tightened his hold on her thighs as he felt her shift on his back and Kagome closed her eyes allowing herself to wiggle slightly. She felt his clawed fingers begin to stroke her leg lightly, his long nails causing spasms of delight to flow through her. One hand moved higher, his thumb working up under her skirt, hooking under her panties and caressing the rounded curve of her posterior. Kagome groaned at the sensation his nails caused her, shuddering in her delight and pressing herself close to him, burying her face in his hair.
His pace slowed and stopped, gently twisting and pulling her to his front pressing her to his bare chest, nuzzling her throat and growling. The sensation of her naked breasts pressed close to his chest made her gasp in surprise.
Kagome sat up panting, eyes wide and startled adjusting to the early dawn light. She groaned and closed her eyes. She had been dreaming again and was horrified that the compulsion of the dream was so strong that it had followed her to the past. She ran a hand through her hair trying to rid herself of the warm intoxicating need that pooled in her stomach, before sensing the presence of someone else in the room. Mustering her courage she opened her eyes again and looked over her shoulder. Her wanton lust disappeared to be replaced with cold fear as she saw Inuyasha sitting cross-legged by the door watching her with narrowed eyes.
"Get your things, we are leaving." he growled as he fluidly stood and walked out the door without a backward glance.
Kagome buried her head in her hands, tears leaking from her eyes. Somehow she had begun to dream about him in his presence and he knew! He could tell that she was lusting after him and he was disgusted by it. Kagome tried not to sob at the sadness that overwhelmed her. Goodness knows what she had muttered and called in her sleep, and he had been sitting only five feet away watching and listening. He was so disgusted that he could only stand her waking presence for long enough to bark an order at her, and then he was gone. She tightened her hands into fists, feeling her nails lightly cut her palms but rejoicing in the pain that it gave her distracting her from her overwhelming feeling of loneliness and sadness.
A fleeting thought came to her mind as she knelt, her head bowed. If Inuyasha did not want her, then why not allow herself to fantasize about the dream Inuyasha. At least she would be happy whilst she slept, at least she would have a few moments where she would be completely content and happy, even if they were just imagined. She wiped her eyes and slowly got to her feet. At least she could dream.
Please let me know what you think ^_^