Authors note: I though Harley and Deadpool... why not. Hope you like it.

Disclaimer: I don't own any characters from DC Comics or Marvel comics.

Chapter 1


Harleen Quinzel A.K.A. Harley Quinn was walking aimlessly through Gotham streets. Her "puddin" had done it again. He pushed her out of a train in movement just for the laugh of it. She had to stay in the Hospital for almost six months before she had the strength to bust out.

"this is it" she said stomping to the aveniu "I won't go back to him" she said out loud. And people looked at her strangely "as if" she mumbled. She knew better. After all she was a shrink she knew she will go back to him. Sooner or later her obsession with the Clown prince of crime will make her go back begging.

"NO!" she screamed and people started to cross the street to avoid her "I won't!" she was trying to convince herself "I need to take him out of my mind" she looked around she was by the piers of Gotham, not much there to go except for the Iceberg Lounge. Not the best place to meet people but it couldn't be worse than the Joker.

It was early but she didn't have anything else to do. She walked to the door. The bouncer looked at her from head to toe, she was wearing some rag jeans and a sweater.

"this is a classy lounge" he told her and didn't allow her to enter. She looked at the big man, he was twice her side... In every direction but he wasn't something she can't handle. In a fast move she took the red cordon he used to block her way, jumped to his shoulders and choked him with it. He fell heavily through the door into the Lounge. Four armed man appeared and pointed their arms to her. She slowly raised her hands.

"who dare to bust into my Lounge" the Penguin said reaching the door

"This is how you receive an old friend?" she said with a smirk. She knew Penguin had a grudge with the Joker. But she also knew they had meant good business for him.

"Harley? Is that you?" He said looking more closely to the blonde woman in front of him

"of course Pengy" she said walking towards him

"you look like crap" he said recognizing the girl and ordering his men to lower their arms "what brings you to my humil place?" he was concern about some Joker skim. She smiled to him.

"I was wondering if you have something more comfortable for me to wear" she said passing two fingers under his chin "I think you owe me a dress" she said in a giggle and played with his sparse hair

"that wasn't my fault" he said reaching for her butt. She didn't mind, she really needed a dress and she didn't had any money. "but alright. For old times sake" he said showing her the way to the back stage. There she had a large choice from all the dresses of the dancers. She found what she was looking for, a little tight black dress, she puted on red high heels and some fantasy jewelry. Tide her hair up and put some make up. When she looked at the mirror she didn't look at the little girl dazzler by the Clown, she looked at the woman in search for adventure.

By the time she was ready the Lounge was full. She sat at the bar and started to look for her adventure. She had some men invited her drinks but when they realized who she was they run away. It was frustrating. She was about to called the night when she saw him. Sitting at the other side of the Lounge in a red and black costume, surrounded by women he wasn't that much impressive but the bag of money on his table was. He had bottles of expensive whisky and champagne. He was practically throwing money.

"That's exactly what I need" she said to herself "an idiot with money" she giggled "who is that?" she asked at the bartender

"he's a crazy one, new in town" the bartender answered "I think he is an assassin, he always comes after a job"

"Exactly what I need" she giggled again and walked towards him. She jumped on top of his table " You. Me. Your apartment. NOW!" she said.

Deadpool just finished another bloody job. This dimension was great. No S.H.I.E.L.D, no Fury, no people running away from him and Batman. He smiled. Yep, life was good on this side of the dimensional rift. He found his heaven in this Iceberg Lounge, a place where he can spend all his profits, eating chimichangas and touching a lot of boobies.

This was his regularly 'job well done' kind of night. A lot of chimichangas and a lot of women. Until blondy arrived, she stood on top of his table, legs slightly open and demand him to take her. But the only thing Deadpool could think in that moment was...

"Mother of Boobies" the little black dress looked about to explode on her breast, her long slim legs and her firm and tight butt make her perfect.

"we can see her panties from here"

"Fuck off blondy" said one of the women surrounding Deadpool "We saw him first, bitch"

The blonde woman smiled, took one of her earrings off and jumped on top of the woman and tear her eyes out with the earring.

"did that just happen?" one of the voices in his head asked

"of course, you idiot we just saw it" the other answered

"shh both of you" Deadpool said to them. While in reality was drooling all over himself

"did you just blinded that woman with your earring?" he finally asked the blonde woman sitting next to him

"she called me bitch" she explained

"Harley!" Penguin appeared "what we talked about blood on the carpet?"

"I'll pay the drycleaning" Deadpool said throwing a bunch of money to Penguins face

"aren't we leaving?" she asked Deadpool.

Both of them left the Lounge and jumped into a taxi.

"the Penguin called her Harley" the intelligent voice in his head said "I think we heard that name before"

"I think I would remember that junk" the other answered

"boobies" whats all Deadpool could say.

She didn't wait to his apartment, she sat on top of him at the taxi, and lift his mask to uncover his mouth. She started to kissing him passionately. He kissed her back. His hands taking turns on her butt and breast. She was moving back and forward, rubbing his pennis with her tights.

"you don't want to wake Mr. Mighty just yet" he whispered between kisses. She giggled and reached for it on his pants. Her hands were experts rubbing just as he liked. She knew exactly what she was doing.

They reach his apartment just in time. He wanted to take her in every surface of his apartment. They entered and she pushed him to a wall.

"I love when they take charge" the smart one said.

Then the woman put her foot on his neck.

"I didn't see this coming"

" uhhh kinky"

" If you wanted you'll have to earn it" she said and in a half turn she kicked him with her other foot.

"You ask for it, sweet tits" Deadpool said and they started to fight.

She giggled and laugh hysterically, she was enjoying this as much as Deadpool was. He ripped her dress with a kitchen knife while teared up his costume with her nails. Both where almost totally naked, she didn't seem to mind about the scars and blisters, she was a total animal and he was liking it too much. Finally he caught her from behind and penetrated her, she moaned and tried to escape but he grabbed her hard and shaked her back and forward. Her body was cover in sweat as his, her hair fell over her naked back, he grabbed her from it and yanked her towards him, so her body was press against his. She pushed the wall in front of her to hit him with the one behind them, Deadpool took advantage of this and turned her around and pinned her to the floor. And penetrated her again, this time she scream in pleasure, she laugh and giggled and wrapped her legs around him. Then yanked him to be on top and started to ride him. He was about to come and realized she was too. He couldn't contain himself anymore and the sperm explode inside her. She too got to the climax and scream


Authors note: for those who doesn't know Deadpool he has two voices in his head, a crazy one and a smart one. I know is confusing but try to figure it out. Read ya!