Forgotten Conscience Chapter 70
Love unconditionally actually
Okay... I can do this.
I take another deep breath and stare at Giles' front door some more.
I haven't worked up the courage to go in yet.
I run my fingers through my hair.
All I have to do is get through this meeting and then I can talk to her and make things right.
I open the door and walk in. After I take a few steps I stop in my tracks.
Faith... she's already here, with the gang.
"Hey... did I miss all the fun?"
She looks up at me and then at the floor.
"No we were... they were waiting for you."
I can hear a hint of pain in her voice as she speaks.
I'll make that pain go away Faith, I promise you.
I close the door and walk in a bit more.
"Well I'm here now so let's get this party started."
I walk over and sit down on the easy chair across the room from her.
I don't want to crowd her, I'll make things right later.
I look at her and she's looking back at me but quickly looks down as our eyes meet.
I'm sorry Faith.
I try and compose myself.
"So... what's the what?"
Giles starts off.
"Buffy, we have another problem."
"God you know, maybe we should just buy a big white board so we can write it all down. Do we have a white board? What's the problem now?"
Willow hands me the morning paper and I read the front page.
'Two young girls murdered at Sunnydale U'
I look over at Giles.
"Do we think the vampire cult was involved?"
"No, there were no neck wounds."
Maybe it was Adam.
"What about Adam?"
"He's more a rip people open to get at the toy surprise kinda guy."
I start to look over the paper to see what killed them.
Faith takes the words right out of my eyes.
"So what killed them?"
"They were stabbed..."
I look up at Giles.
"Through the heart, with a knife..."
"Okay hold it..."
They think it's Faith.
"Just because they were stabbed doesn't mean Faith did it."
"We didn't say Faith did it."
"No but that's where you were going, I know you guys."
"Well you gotta admit Buffy, the evidence is pretty obvious."
"What evidence? Two people get stabbed and we're gonna lock Faith up? Come on..."
"I don't kill people, not anymore anyway."
"That evidence isn't all we're going on."
"Um... I don't kill people anymore."
"What else did you find out? Do they have some sort of connection?"
"I didn't kill anyone."
"Well what is it?"
What? How am I the connection?
I look over at Faith and she's stopped trying to interrupt.
She's sitting there looking at the floor with her head in her hands.
"How am I the connection?"
I look through the paper for their names.
"I didn't even know these girls."
"Buffy they were young, college freshman, both blonde, and their names both have the initials B.S."
"I DIDN'T KILL ANYONE!"
"I know Faith I know."
I believe her, but I don't think anyone else does. I gotta prove she didn't do it or we'll never get our chance.
"When did these murders happen?"
"They happened the past two nights."
She couldn't have done it.
"See, I couldn't have done it, I've been with B at her place every night since I've been back."
She wasn't with me the whole night last night, what if she... no, no she didn't, she couldn't have.
"What about last night?"
"What about it?"
You took the words right out of my mouth Faith.
"Faith you called me last night at 3 past midnight to tell me that you had moved out."
"So he's saying there's no telling what you could've done between the time you called and now."
Faith turns to Anya.
"You're cruising for a bruising sister."
"Did you hear that Xander? She threatened to kill me."
"Anya, remember what we talked about yesterday? If you don't have anything nice to say..."
"Don't say anything at all... fine."
Anya grudgingly calms down.
"Faith we are not saying that you killed the girls, nor are we saying that you are lying when you say you believe you did not kill them..."
"Really? Cause that's what it sounds like you're saying."
Willow steps in.
"Faith we've talked it over and we think this might be part of the spell..."
"I didn't kill anyone even if it was part of this stupid spell thing I would've remembered doing it. Killing someone is not the kind of thing you forget."
"Unless you weren't conscious of what you were doing."
"Okay now you're just reaching. You're trying to pin this on me just cause I used to kill people."
"No Faith, we're not."
"Then explain to me how I kill people when I'm unconscious."
Okay I should break in here.
"Faith we didn't say you were killing people, we're just worried that with the spell..."
"Look if the spell is the problem then why don't we just get rid of it? What happened with the counter spell?"
The room falls silent.
I can't tell if this is a bad thing but it's probably not gonna be a good thing.
I look over at Faith and I catch her smile at me before she looks away uncomfortably.
"What? What is it guys? We couldn't find anything?"
"No we... we found something it's just... it could be really... dangerous."
"Dangerous how? Dangerous to who? To Faith?"
Maybe we shouldn't do it if it could hurt Faith.
"To both of you."
Both of us? How could it be dangerous to both of us?
"Well, according to what I've researched there's only one way to break the obsession spell."
Okay here's where the danger comes in I bet.
Faith asks Willow the same question I just did.
"By bonding her to the object of the spell's obsession."
"What do you mean bonding?"
"Well apparently the only way to break the obsession is to 'share' it with the spell's trigger. Sharing it is supposed to remove it's effect on the victim. But there's a problem..."
Here it comes.
"Because you guys already, have, a connection... a slayer connection, it could make your connection stronger, which doesn't sound like entirely a bad thing but it could be a problem."
I look at Faith and she's looking back with a worried look.
"You might start to think the same thoughts, you might feel each other's feelings, and you could even start to hear each other's thoughts. The down side being that in a key moment one of you might hear the other's thoughts and get confused. It could get one of you killed, or even both of you."
"That's some bond."
She's worried how this might affect me. Maybe we should find another way.
"What do you think Faith?"
We look at each other and our eyes meet dead on for the first time since the meeting began.
"I don't know... it sounds like it could be a big risk. Plus I don't know how I feel about having you inside my head like that. What do you think B?"
I should talk with Faith about this alone.
"I'm not sure... guys can you, can you guys give us a minute to talk about this?"
"Of course, clearly this is a decision the two of you have to make together."
The room gets quiet again.
I don't think they understood what I meant.
"It'd be easier to make that decision if we could talk alone."
"Oh, of course... Willow, Tara why don't you help me make sure we have everything we shall need for the counter spell should they decide to go through with it. Anya would you make some tea? Xander, a doughnut run may be needed."
They get up and start to get to their jobs, leaving Faith and I sitting alone in Giles' living room. Suddenly the few feet between us feel like miles. I stand up and move over to the couch, sitting down and facing her. She sits staring at the floor away from me.
I've got to say something.
"If this is the speech about how you can't stand to look at me and you wish I could just go away and never come back can we just skip it?"
She thinks I want her to leave? That's not what I want at all.
"Faith no... this is the speech about how I love you and that nothing you could ever do or say could ever make me love you any less."
She runs her fingers through her hair and the pain in her voice deepens.
"I've had people say those words to me before B. My mother used to say that to me every day, right up until she threw me out because one of her boyfriends liked me better."
"I told you Faith, what we have is going to be different than anything either of us has ever had before and I meant it."
I take one of her hands in mine and put it against my heart so she can feel it beating for her. She looks up at me for a second before looking at her hand on my chest.
"It really was beating for you last night Faith, and it still does."
She looks up at me in the eyes again with a look of longing.
She leans into me and our foreheads meet, our eyes still locked. After a moment of silence, I decide to break it.
She reaches up with her free hand and caresses my cheek.
It's time we talked about the problem at hand.
"We don't have to do this if you don't want to."
She takes a deep breath.
"No we have to do this, it's the only way to make sure your friends will learn to trust me again."
She closes her eyes and leans back a bit.
"Faith all that really matters is that I trust you."
"Of course I do. Faith look at me."
She doesn't open her eyes. I let go of Faith's hand against my heart and put my hands on her chin, lifting her head so our eyes meet, if they weren't closed.
"Faith just look me in the eyes and tell me you didn't kill those girls."
She opens her eyes and stares into me.
"I didn't kill them."
She's telling the truth.
"Then you didn't do it and we won't go through with this."
She leans in again and kisses me lightly. I get so caught up in us that I don't notice someone standing a few feet behind Faith.
"Did um... did you guys want um... some tea or something?"
Faith turns around and panics.
"Hey uh... Buffy and I were just... I was just um..."
"Did you want tea or coffee?"
She looks at me.
"We're okay Tara."
Tara smiles at us and goes back to the kitchen.
"I'm sorry B I know, I know you wanted to tell your friends yourself and all that, I shouldn't have kissed you like that, but maybe it's for the best I mean..."
"It's okay Faith, she already knew."
"Hmm? How did she find out? Did you tell her?"
"No... it's uh, kinda complicated but she actually kinda helped me figure out how I really feel about you."
She looks at me for a second.
"Then I guess I owe her big time."
She smiles at me and I smile back.
"Buffy if you're willing to go through with this then I'm willing to go through with it too. I'll do it for us."
I lean in to kiss her.
"So did you decide what to do?"
I turn to look at Anya sitting down across the room. I straighten up uncomfortably and so does Faith.
"We decided to go through with it."
Giles comes in to the room and sits down.
"Excellent, then as soon as Xander comes back we can begin."
Willow and Tara come back into the room and sit down, Tara in the chair and Willow on the arm rest.
"So... what did we decide?"
Anya answers for us.
"They're gonna do it, which means we probably won't get murdered in our sleep."
Faith glares at Anya for a second before turning around and looks at the door.
"If Xander doesn't get back here soon I may find I've got one more murder in me."
You and me both, Faith you and me both...
End of Chapter 70