Dangerous Minds- Epilogue
Three Years Later….
The years have seemed to pass by so quickly and as I stare out at the pond of the newly bought house that Stefan purchased, far away from Mystic Falls and all the haunting memories that have seemed to follow him over the years. I close my eyes and inhale deeply. From far in the distance, I can hear Damon and Stefan talking about moving boxes and where to put them.
Placing my hand onto my stomach, I feel myself getting nervous as I remind my mind to stay calm. These last few years have been hard on us all. A lot of things have changed and it all mostly happened after Stefan and Damon's father and stepmother were arrested for their crimes against Elena.
Her death changed us all too. Jillian and John decided to move closer to Stefan and the rest of us as Kol and Katherine moved further away. She and Kol married in Long Island and now live there with their daughter. As far as Stefan. He's struggled with Elena's death, not fully able to accept it. That's why I think he moved out of Virginia so quickly afterwards and went to live closer to his work in Washington D.C., a few hours outside of the city on a few acres with a quiet pond. A while after we told Addison about who Stefan was to her, she began the hard process of living with him part time. None of us were sure if things would go well. But, it became even more important for him to be a bigger part of her life after Elena passed away and they both struggled to understand. Just a little over three months ago, Stefan regained his full custodial rights as Addison's biological father and she asked to live with him.
It was the hardest on Damon to watch her leave our home and start to live with Stefan full time. That was until today, when they made it a permanent transition. I turn around, smiling as Addison excitedly pulls Damon into the house, wanting to show off her brand new bedroom. All the changes happened so quickly that it's been a whirl wind of emotions. Including this one. My mind drifts off as I place my hand onto my flat stomach and I smile. Damon doesn't know. I haven't managed to tell him yet. However, I just found out something that's going to change our lives. By a miracle and after many failed attempts at IVF treatments and crying in the office of my fertility doctor. I got the most life changing news ever this morning. I pull out my cell phone as I place the receiver to my ear and listen to the message again. "Hi, Mrs. Salvatore. This is Dr. Jefferson from the Harborview Medical Center. We've got some great news regarding your test results. Please give us a call back to discuss them further."
How do I tell my husband the news that I just received? How do I tell him that after so many heartbreaking years of being childless that now…
"Elijah's planning on retiring and replacing my job title with his own." Damon comments to Stefan as he drops a box in front of him and I walk into the room, smiling nervously.
"Elijah wants to make you deputy director of the FBI?" I ask, my eyes widening as he nods his head and mentions that Kol was the one who made the recommendation to him before he left the Virginia office.
"That would mean that we'd be living in D.C. too?" I question as Damon smiles at me, walking over to me and putting his arm around me while he gives me a soft kiss on the cheek.
"Yup. We could be closer to Stefan and Addy that way." He informs me as I laugh a little, moving away from Damon for a moment and exhaling out a breath. I need to tell him; I need to just spit it out already!
"I don't know about that, Damon. Why can't he ask Klaus to take over?" I ask him as Stefan gives me a bewildered look.
"You didn't know?" Stefan asks as I shake my head. What are they talking about?
Stefan glances down at the ground as he shrugs his shoulders and takes a deep breath. His voice is shaky when he explains why Klaus can't take over. I haven't heard anything about Klaus Mikaelson over the last few years. Ever since he shot Elena and she died, all I knew about him was that he was seeking counseling and trying to make amends with what he had done on the job.
"Klaus left the FBI a year ago. He moved himself and his wife to Europe. To London to be closer to his wife's parents and so that they could raise their children there. Last I heard from Elijah. He said Klaus was really struggling with his inner demons. Elijah finally admitted to me that about three months ago, Klaus couldn't take it anymore and he drove home drunk one night. His car crashed into a pole on an icy country road as he was going home and he died instantly from the impact. Klaus is dead."
"Oh my god." Covering my mouth, I feel the tears brimming on to my eyelashes. Turning around, I exhale deeply. "I couldn't even imagine what that must have been like for his daughter and newly born little boy. His wife too."
"Hey. Shh, Bon." Damon says to me in a comforting way, rushing over to my side as his arms wrap around me and I bury my face into the curve of his neck, sobbing. Damon's hand rubs my back while he kisses my face and then he pulls away, locking his eyes onto me. "Babe. What's going on?" He asks as I continue crying and I stammer it out at the most inappropriate time. "I'm pregnant, Damon….I'm crying because I'm sad. But, I'm also two months pregnant." I tell him admittingly, wailing sobs against his shirt as Stefan and Damon both exhale deeply and I clutch onto my husband, looking up at him briefly while his stunned face tells me all. He's just as scared as I am.
The quiet house makes me feel lonelier than I've felt in a long time.
But, her soft voice and curios tone make my heart warm as she steps into my office, knocking on the door lightly. "Daddy…" Addison's voice trails off as if she's almost unsure of calling me her father.
"Yeah, baby?" I ask, looking up at her with a beaming smile when she finally makes her way into my office. I notice an envelope in her hands. When she hands it to me and says. "It's addressed to you, dad."
I know exactly who it's from just by looking at the hand writing.
It's from her.
"Will you excuse me for a few minutes?" Addison nods, pausing at the entrance to my office door as she turns around and says in a soft tone. "She left me one too, daddy….I wish I would have known her better. I think she would have loved me a lot."
"She did love you a lot, baby. She loved you more than you will ever know." I comment, watching Addison exit the room as I take a seat in the chair behind me and close my eyes. My hands are shaking as they open up the white envelope and I glance over at the hand writing. It's addressed from three years earlier; the last night she was in my apartment. The last night we were together.
January 16, 2015
I don't know how to put this into words. Being with you tonight has brought back so many memories for me that it makes me hate myself for what I've done to hurt you. I promised myself that if we saw each other again that I wouldn't lie about how I felt for you. I promised myself that I wouldn't use you anymore either. I've done that already to way too many people and I've hurt so many along the way without manipulating them. I guess the manipulation aspect of my personality grew a lot more after I robbed the bank in Prague with Owen by my side. He taught me everything that I needed to do to get exactly what I wanted and it worked for a long time. Deceiving. Manipulating and worming my way into people's lives, acting as if I was someone extraordinarily important was a great way to mask what was really going on- what I was really hiding from the world. My pain.
The loss of giving Addison up destroyed me. But at the time, I really did think and I still do think that she's better off with Damon and Bonnie. Maybe even one day, she'll be better with you. I know that because I'll be thrown back into prison and she will never fully get the chance to know me. But, I'm going to write her a letter too and I'm going to make her a promise. I promise Addison that after my sentence is handed down to me. I am going to make myself a better person- for her. While I'm away, I want our daughter to know that she'll always be a part of me and that I've always loved her. Even when she was just a little bean growing in my belly, I knew that she was going to turn into an extremely wonderful little girl and I have no doubt that she'll be an even more spectacular young woman.
You know, after Jenna died and I lost our first baby. I started to feel hollow inside. I didn't think that I could learn to love and just simple learn to feel human again. However, throughout your love and support- I dug myself out for a while. I was good and happy whenever I was with you and tonight, it reminded me of that. Even though my happiness was short lived and I turned to drugs to numb myself after Addison was taken away from me. I never stopped once believing that I could feel a small shred of happiness again. So, thank you for reminding me of what it feels like to be happy.
Being on the run from the agency was exhilarating. Being someone I wasn't, in every new place I discovered was a high that I was addicted too. I thought it was fun, I'm not going to lie and tell you that it wasn't. Because, truth is- I now realize what I was doing. I was running from my past and from my demons. I was running from everything that reminded me of you. The ones that I had left behind the night my daughter and my rights as a parent were stripped from me. The ones that had haunted me every single night I'd fall asleep to the shrieking noises of agony in the women's shelter that your parents had dropped me off at. I was running from the things that haunted me. I was running from my own fears.
Stefan, I know that you'll probably never forgive me fully for my crimes and I don't blame you for that. I honestly don't think I'm ever going to fully forgive myself either. However, I want you to know that I'm sorry. I'm sorry for taking the chance of being an amazing father to our little girl away from you. I'm sorry for hurting you and for breaking your heart with my cruel words the other night. I'm pretty sure that you're sorry for your words as well.
Just know this and believe it. Because, it's true. You were always the love of my life and no matter what happens in our journey. I want you to know that I have always loved you, Stefan Salvatore. Thank you for loving such a broken soul and making her whole again- even if it was just for one night. I'm never going to forget the way that you've loved me. I'm never going to forget the way you've made me feel tonight. Whole again. Alive again. Home again.
A/N: I will NOT be writing a sequel at all for this story nor do I have a desire to write one. So, this is the final end to Dangerous Minds and this concludes the story. Once again, thank you all for reading and I hope you all have enjoyed reading! :)