"Well at least we know he's not a vampire."
The group was still in Barney's bedroom and the initial shock had died down. Now they were trying to think on what to do next.
"This doesn't disprove it. It's even more evidence!"
"What? How is this possibly more evidence?"
"He could be shrinking down people to keep as victims. Or maybe he's creating an army of tiny people just waiting to attack! Or even…"
Lily had heard enough. "Guys lay off on the vampire Barney conspiracy!"
"Shh don't speak so loud!" Robin shout whispered, seeing the little girl stirring. "Back to what really matters" She glared at the guys and they cowered under her mighty glare. "How could Barney stumble on a tiny little girl? Barney hates kids!"
Ted turned to her. "Seriously, is that what you're focusing on? That Barney hates kids?"
"Well… yeah! I mean, I could tell why he would keep a tiny chick but a girl? Is he babysitting Thumbelina's kid or something?"
"Robin's right." Lily pointed out. "I've seen how he treats my kids in kindergarten and it's not that different to how he treats dogs." Lily had a flashback to that time when Barney had a little boy to fetch him the newspaper. The embarrassing part was that the kid went.
"Right, because it's totally normal to see two inch people walking around. But if it's a kid in Barney's apartment, that's weird."
"You've obviously haven't watched Discovery lately."
"Because Mythbusters won't have new episodes until next month!"
Apparently he had spoken too loud 'cause they heard a gasp coming from the nightstand. When they turned to look, two tiny green eyes were staring fearfully at them. Then the owner of said eyes bolted. Before she could get too far, two hands clasped around her, effectively trapping the two inch girl.
"What? I've caught bigger and faster so this kid wasn't that hard to catch."
Robin felt the trembling increase between her hands.
"What do we do with her now?"
"We?! You're the one keeping her prisoner!"
"Oh give her to me." Lily extended her hands and Robin released a terrified Molly on top of them.
Lily held her up to eye level and softly talked to her. Molly looked up teary eyed at her, sniffing and wiping her nose with her sleeve. Lily smiled to her and Molly tentatively smiled back. She whispered words of comfort to her and before long; Molly was full on smiling and looking very comfortably in her hands.
"Wow Lily, you really are good to kids."
"It's not so hard if you're trying not to scare them." She shot a pointed look at Robin.
"Hey! I wasn't trying to scare the poor kid…"
"Guys, what are you doing here?"
They all turned to look at Barney standing at the bedroom door.
"We were just uhm.."
"I thought you…"
"I can't believe you broke into my bedroom and grabbed Molly!" While he talked he walked over to Lily and she immediately handed her to him. They all looked ashamed and were looking anywhere but him.
"Seriously, talk about the lack of personal space! But most importantly…" He put his hand at eye level to have a better look at Molly. "What do you think about them?"
Ted, Marshall, Robin and Lily all turned as one to Barney.
"They're all nice especially Lily, and Robin's just how you said she would be."
Barney nodded and then pointed and laughed at them. "Ha! Always one step ahead!"
"When can I meet your friends?" Molly looked up from her small portion of Barney's sandwich.
"Mmmh." He munched while he meditated.
They continued eating in silence for ten minutes until Barney startled Molly into an impressive jump for someone her size.
"I know! We could hide you in a cake and bring you to Lily and Marshall's apartment. They would ask why I brought the cake and I would tell that it's the president's birthday. On cue you would spring up from the cake and say 'Happy Birthday Mr. President!'. We'll get you in a white dress (don't worry, I know a doll guy) and the cake would have a cabin in the inside. Or maybe a scuba diving suit under the dress…"
"Or maybe they could just follow you home and we watch when they find me."
"That works too."
I know I haven't updated in a long while but consider this a Christmas present to all of you who are still following this story!