A/N: Ok, so this is silly and a bit dumb. Hopefully it's good for a chuckle, or at least an eye-roll. Not recommended for canon-purists or those who hate Fleur. Naturally I don't own any of the Harry Potter setting, just the weird dreams I have involving it.

The Four-Witch Tournament


The Veela Cup

The twin redheads rushed into the Great Hall just in time for the meal to begin. The Beauxbatons and Durmstrang students were assembled, as were most of the Hogwarts students and staff, the general hubbub of pre-dinner conversation echoing off the walls. Lee Jordan looked Fred and George over. "So, did you-?" he asked, glancing briefly at the crowd. "Are you going to tell me what-"

"It's all ready so you'll have to see," replied Fred, or perhaps George.

"Just sit back and watch the show," added the other.

With that the trio grabbed a helping of food each and ate, distracted however as their gazes occasionally swept across the assembled room. The few other Griffindors nearby who knew the pranksters occasionally glanced over too, knowing the shared grins meant a prank was brewing. The twins however kept quiet, sharing the occasional grin of mutual anticipation and watching the crowd closely.

It began with a sudden shriek, as one of the Hufflepuffs, a witch with silvery blonde hair and attractive figure but wearing a male set of robes began to scream (in a prominently male voice). The assembled crowd went silent to stare, before others began to scream and cry in surprise and horror, each of them a duplicate of a certain Beauxbatons witch who stood up to stare. "What.. what is ze meaning of zis?" she cried, as more and more students began to shift into copies of her. The entire crowd was in panic as a good three-quarters of the student populace from all three schools in attendance were now duplicates of Fleur Delacour, all in varied outfits and wearing looks of surprise and shock. Of the remainder, almost all of the male students seemed to be in a daze with many drooling and near-comatose, and the females were torn between worry and fury. Only the trio of George, Fred, and Lee seemed unaffected by everything as they grinned to each other.

"I believe the crowd just became much more interesting to look at, wouldn't you agree dear brother?" said George (or Fred).

"I wholeheartedly agree, my other half. It's nice to see months of planning and brewing pay off," agreed Fred (or George).

"You two are mental, you know that?" added Lee, shaking his head in bemusement.

The three enjoyed the show as the panic began to subside and students were starting to realize what had happened, shifting to worried murmurs with a few laughs about the crowd. At the Head Table Professor McGonagall was visibly livid with face an unhealthy shade of red, and was shouting to Headmaster Dumbledore in a thick Scottish brogue, about how he "dinna ken th' full pain" she planned to visit upon the "glaikit lads", with the headmaster himself saying something about how "boys will be boys" and taking an unconcerned bite of his lemon pie. Professor Snape had dropped his head into his hands, Professor Flitwick was standing on his chair and remarking on the charms that must have been involved, and Hagrid was lost staring at the crowd of new part-Veelas in confusion and amazement.

A trio of Fleur Delacours in Griffyndor colours came marching up to the twins, fury on one face, with the second confused and the third ogling her own chest. Lee Jordan had wisely decided to shift his seat over and busy himself with his food, feigning ignorance, leaving his two compatriots to shoulder the full blame. The twins gave a mocking bow to each. "Madames," said one, and his twin added with his own bow and his own "Madames".

"You two are the most irresponsible pair of idiots that ever had the misfortune to become wizards! Did you not think of what you just did?!" hissed the witch in a familiar voice.

"Do you know what she's talking about, Gred?" said the one twin with a glance to his counterpart.

"I haven't the slightest idea, Forge. Perhaps she believes we are to blame for this?" he replied, trying to exude an aura of complete innocence.

The now-blonde witch was unamused. "You put some sort of Polyjuice Potion into the food or drink, didn't you?" At their proud grins, she sighed. "Why would you do something like this?"

"Well, you see our dear Miss Delacour," replied 'Gred' with a snigger from 'Forge', "we were sick of the slimy Slitherins putting down our dear Mr. Potter, and figured that making multiple of the lovely French tri-wizard contender would distract everyone for a while."

"Or at least," added 'Forge', "that's what we would have done, were we responsible. You can't prove we did such a masterfully executed prank, can you?"

"Indeed not, mon frère," said the first twin with a shared grin and high-five.

The other 'Fleur' hissed at that. "You wanted to make me less conspicuous by making all of us into duplicates of a veela?!" she growled in a male voice. "You two are gits, did you-" and she trailed off, glancing over at the third new veela still prodding herself in the chest. "Ron, knock that off. That's creepy, mate."

As Ron 'Delacour' mumbled a "sorry", the redheads laughed.

"Oh, our dear sister! Mother will be so proud!" cried one.

"I'm not so sure, brother. Our father may suspect she isn't his!"

"Agreed, dear brother mine. She certainly doesn't have our wonderful looks!"

The three duplicates turned to stare at the pair, all three now visibly angry, and the twins raised their hands. "Hold on, we thought it would be a great joke. Besides, it'll wear off in a half hour or so."

Hermione's expression shifted to fury, while her voice went worryingly calm. "And why, pray tell, would you believe that?"

The twins looked a bit confused at her sudden question. "Well, our dear knowledgeable compatriot, Polyjuice Potion into the pumpkin juice on the student tables means unless people have more in a half hour they'll change back."

"It wasn't as top quality as we would have liked, we did have to use lesser ingredients to manage to brew this much, but I think we managed quite well, wouldn't you Fred?"

"I'm George, Fred, but I do agree. It was a mastery of a prank. It's only too bad that it'll wear off and we'll lose all these beauties."

Hermione's eyebrow began to twitch, and the twin redheads could swear she had feathers spreading across her head. "Fleur is part-veela! She has veela blood!" At their matching looks of confusion she explained. "Do you know why you don't do a non-human Polyjuice Potion?" They shook their heads, and she growled now. "Because it doesn't wear off, you dolts! It has to be undone with a month of powerful restorative draughts. I found that out first-hand in second year."

"Wait, you mean, we're not going to change back?" asked Ron with worry in 'her' voice, and the twins glanced at each other, paling.


The sudden change in appearance and, for at least half of the afflicted, gender led to some quick decrees from the staff. Students who had changed were not allowed to have the same doom rooms as unchanged male students, nor were any transformed male students to be allowed in the girls' dorms. The easiest solution was the few unchanged male students having to move to temporary rooms.

As well, due to the veela allure all of the transformed students were putting out, all of the affected males were under a constant dose of calming draughts and diluted love potions to keep them from turning into drooling morons and thus able to focus upon their classes. This of course had no effect on the simple presence of hundreds of identical attractive young witches, leading to numerous point deductions and detentions for distraction in class and otherwise. As well, it was a well-known secret that all of the good makeout spots tended to be in constant use, and many of the liaisons having little care about the current gender of participants.

Filch was particularly disturbed, finding himself hard-pressed to keep the school clean when every time he went to a broom closet to retrieve something he stumbled upon a pair (and in a few cases multiple participants) snogging or more. More detentions were levied, but the behaviour continued.

A weekly extra class titled "Feminine Introduction" led by Professor Sinestra was mandated for all affected boys across the school, dealing in certain hygiene and biological issues that they suddenly needed to know. It was typically regarded as "mortifying, but less-so than Potions" by all but the Slytherins.

The Weasley twins themselves had escaped detention due to a lack of proof, despite the furious protests in thicker and thicker accent from Professor McGonagall. However, once word had spread they were responsible they'd gone into hiding, using the Marauder's Map to stick to the secret passages of the castle and only show up to classes where the teachers provided some level of protection, even if they were subject to constant angry stares and threats from students and staff alike.


The Yule Ball was likely the most unconventional and unusual one in all history, as every remaining boy had suddenly become a hot commodity for the girls, with fights breaking out to for the chance to be escorted to the ball by one. On top of all that, after a lecture on "proper behaviour and decorum for young ladies" from McGonagall, when the actual night came the room was filled with countless Fleur Delacours all wearing varying styles and colours of dresses and gowns, a good half of them visibly uncomfortable about being dressed so "feminine" for the event. The main stars were the real Fleur in a stunning white number, escorting her twin in a matching black outfit, both radiant beauties. Following them were Victor 'Delacour' Krum in a flowing burgundy gown leading Hermione in a stunning red dress, Cedric in her sequined blue ballgown along with her partner in purple, and Harry herself in a 'killing-curse' green strapless number leading a surprisingly unchanged Cho Chang in her own dress and looking quite put-out by her date being more attractive than her. Even with the confusion of dress it was said to be the highlight of the year, particularly by the males who managed to find immediate dates down to the last of them. The Weasley twins were quite pleased to dance with a pair of Fleur-lookalikes, swapping them between each other periodically before all four sneaking off for somewhere more private. Throughout the evening Fleur herself managed to keep her face composed as she focused on her date, but did remark to herself that she was "très séduisant".

By the time the third task was scheduled, the students had become accustomed to the new forms and it was quite common to see a number of Fleurs conversing in a crowd, a passing hello from a Fleur as she walked by with her friend Fleur, and the occasional Fleur or Fleur trying to fit in some studying or essay work or even hurrying to class. It was common knowledge by then that the best potion brewers were hard at work preparing enough restorative draughts for everyone, and even Professor Snape was more irritable due to lack of sleep from late nights over a cauldron. It was also understood that no one would be able to be changed back before the end of the school year, at the earliest. In turn, the students had mostly accepted their fate as a fact of life, and continued on. Fred and George however, due to consistent threats upon their lives and particularly their male bits, had to withdraw for their own safety for the remainder of the term, taking their classes by tutor and tests by owl.


The false Professor Moody, in actuality Barty Crouch Jr, was possibly having the worst time of it all. While his plan was to ensure that Harry Potter was the first to reach the cup in the center of the maze, all four contenders were now duplicates. This would ordinarily be no problem as his stolen magical eye was able to distinguish them by magical auras alone, except someone had swapped his normal Polyjuice Potion batch for a different one, and the Death Eater found himself herself, and thus unable to use the eye. The plan to imperious Krum and use him to eliminate competition went right out the window, and when the actual day came all four competitors, each wearing a look of nervous determination on her face, all went into the maze one by one on equal footing.

The spectators were thoroughly confused as Fleur Delacour avoided a patch of devil's snare in one section of the maze, while Fleur Delacour battled an acromantula in another, Fleur Delacour fought off a swarm of angry snakes in yet another, and a fourth Fleur Delacour was beset by a riddling sphinx. By sheer coincidence, all four champions reached the center of the maze at the same time, all four looking at the cup then at each other.

"You should be the one to take it, Fleur," suggested Cedric-Fleur.

"Non, you three are ze better champions, I was ze last in ze rankings. Take ze cup," replied the real Fleur.

"You are the winner regardless," commented a third Fleur in the heavily accented voice of Victor Krum. "You suffered the most."

"Let's all grab it at the same time," suggested Harry. "Four Polyjuiced duplicates already made a mockery of the event, so let's make a mockery of the finale. Besides," she added, "how would they know who the real winner was anyways?"

With that settled, all four Tr-Wizard Cup Champions reached out and grabbed at the cup as one, then with a yank of a portkey vanished.


Four identical quarter-veela witches fell onto the damp ground in the darkness of a graveyard. As they stood up to get their bearings, they each looked about with confusion. "The cup was a portkey!" said one. "D'you think it's part of the task?" asked another. "I do not zink zo," muttered the third. "Keep watch," added the fourth, and all four pulled out their wands.

A figure advanced out of the fog, hooded cloak pulled up obscuring his or her face, and carrying what looked like a baby, or possibly just a bundle of robes. The figure paused, as if confused by the sight of four identical quadruplets aiming wands. "Master," he whined, "I don't understand! They're all the same!"

A high, cold voice gave a snakelike hiss. "Wormtail, you fool. Crouch explained, one of these is the real Potter. Find him!"

Wormtail pulled out his wand, and shakily pointed at the four. "If you give me the real Harry Potter I will let the rest of you go. But if you don't," and he swallowed nervously. "If you don't, I'll torture you until you wish you had!"

Harry took a breath and opened her mouth, before one of her twins stepped forward. "I'm Harry Potter, I'm the one you want." As Wormtail aimed his wand at her, another stepped up. "No, I am the real Potter." A third approached. "I am ze véritable 'Arry Potter!" she announced. Harry stepped forward, to add her two knuts. "No, I'm Harry Potter, I'm the real one, Wormtail."

Wormtail shook nervously as his wand darted back and forth between the four of them, unsure of himself. This was certainly not a situation he was used to, and he never regretted joining the dark lord more than he did now. "Master, I don't, I can't, I... which is which? Master, please!"

The baby-like Voldemort hissed. "That one! That's him!" as he pointed a stubby arm to the middle witch who was clutching her forehead. As all four champions cast their spells Wormtail deflected with a powerful protego then swept his wand and cast a "petrificus totalus universus", at which all four witches went stiff and fell over. With all four immobilized he then proceeded to tie up the real Harry followed by the other three duplicates, hurrying to make up the lost time. Harry had a good view of a hairless scaled and thoroughly deformed infant-like figure as it was lowered into the cauldron, followed by Pettigrew lifting his wand to the sky.

"Bone of the father, unknowingly given, you will renew your son!" he cried, and the grave under Harry's feet cracked, a trickle of dust flying out and into the cauldron, turning the contents a vivid toxic blue and scattering sparks everywhere. Wormtail whimpered, and raised a silver dagger with his free hand over the cauldron, voice breaking into sobs. "Flesh of the servant, w-w-willingly given, you will - you will - revive - your master!" and swung the dagger, his screams echoing in the night as something dropped into the cauldron with a splash. Harry struggled, but was unable to get free of the bindings tying her to the gravestone and only able to watch as the wretched man clutched the stump of his wrist and staunched the blood with a quick spell.

Finally he moved up to the bound and helpless Harry, lifting the knife. "Blood of the.. the enemy... forcibly taken... you will.. you... you will resurrect... your foe." He jabbed Harry's arm with the point, then awkwardly fumbled in his robes for a vial, holding it up to collect the blood dripping down. He then poured it into the cauldron with a whimper, and the contents began to violently boil. A pure white light shone out of it, growing brighter and brighter still, until even with eyes closed Harry felt she was staring into the sun...

Harry later found out that the reason Polyjuice Potion was dangerous was not only because it performed a shapechange on the drinker, but that it changed all of the drinker's body to match the polyjuiced form, and such a change would persist in any part of the body removed. This included the blood, which being added to the ritual mix had an unexpected effect.

There was an explosion, far too loud to be heard as anything but a wave of pressure, and the gravestone shattered sending Harry flying backwards along with everything else within the area. Shortly after the spell wore off and the four identical champions rose shakily to their feet, observing the devastation. The cauldron was simply gone, with a smouldering crater left in the blackened ground, a few random bits of twisted metal scattered about the edges of the blast radius and some further back amongst the graves. Wormtail had been caught by the blast and all but vapourized, leaving only his arm with a single finger missing. Somehow Harry found that ironically fitting. Of the apparent Dark Lord, no trace was ever found.


The aftermath of the third task was a mixed affair. With the eyewitness testimony of all four participants, Minister Fudge was forced to admit that not only was there a high chance that Sirius Black was completely innocent, but that Voldemort had tried to return, and been thwarted once again. The Tri-Wizard Tournament ended in its first ever four-way tie, with all three participating schools accepting victory for all participating champions. The celebratory feast was particularly festive, with many of the Fleurs dressing up for the occasion and leaving the hall full of numerous beautiful young witches. The four champions promised to keep in touch over the holidays and on, sharing a four-way hug eliciting some wolf-whistles from a few students.

The train ride home was... interesting. Hermione, Harry, and Ron sat in a compartment, conversing. "Why didn't I change back, Hermione?" protested the still female and still Fleur-lookalike Ron. She was about to reply when the door slid open and in walked Fleur, with the hulking figures of Crabbe and Goyle guarding her. "Potty," she greeted in Draco's unmistakeable drawl. "As well as the mudblood and the weasel. I might have known. Except it looks like the weasel is now the newest daughter. At least she's not a redhead like the rest of them, silver is a much more Slytheirn colour."

Ron growled and tried to leap forward, held back by the other two, although Hermione was busy also holding back giggles. "What's so funny, mudblood?" demanded the veela Malfoy. "I'm sure you had something to do with me not changing back! Why, when my father hears of this-"

Hermione giggled loudly. "He'll be pleased, Draco, that his line will continue!" she gasped out, before doubling over and shaking in suppressed laughter. Draco gave a confused look shared by her bodyguards flanking her. Harry caught on however, and broke into laughter as well. "I always suspected you were into guys, Malfoy, but now we know!"

Draco scowled and muttered a "You'll pay for this Potter, I swear it!" before flicking her hair back in a remarkably feminine way then storming out, Crabbe and Goyle following looking completely lost. Ron was just as lost as she watched the two gasp for breath between laughs.

"I don't get it. Why didn't I change back? What's so funny?"

Hermione wheezed and wiped tears from her face before setting it into a disapproving expression. "Ron.. you just couldn't resist testing things out, could you? And I bet you never once thought of any sort of protection! Didn't you pay any attention in Professor Sinestra's class?"

Ron blushed. "I was curious, it was just the once," she mumbled. "And I had my wand with me for protection."

Harry bit back further chuckles as he tried to match the serious expression. "Not that sort of protection, mate. You see, when a witch and a wizard love each other very much..." he managed before he broke out into laughter again, followed by Hermione losing composure and bursting into a fit of embarrassed giggles. Ron went pale as she made the connections. "Oh no, my mum's going to KILL me!"


All in all, it was probably the most unique Tri-Wizard Tournament ever in history.

Molly Weasley was taken aback by her sudden daughter, and furious at Ron for being so careless, but that gave way to joy once she cuddled and cooed at her new granddaughter.

Lucius Malfoy was said to be furious his former son had become "a half-breed filth", although he did eventually reveal that there may have been a trace of veela in the family lineage leading to their famed good looks and silver hair. He also was known to dote on his newly christened granddaughter Lyra Malfoy.

Fleur was quite happy, as thanks to events a new bill had passed in the British Wizengamot guaranteeing full blood rights to wizards and witches of being ancestry including part-veelas such as herself; great news for her and her new fiance Bill Weasley. She continued to champion for further rights for veela and all beings, leading to further equality for them and by extension muggleborn and half-bloods.

Sirius "Padfoot" Black continued to live at Grimmauld place even after the trial proving his innocence, but was heard to constantly grumble that he should have visited the school during the tournament and bemoaned missing his chance to see "hundreds of lovely veelas all in the same room".

Bartemus Crouch Junior was given a restorative draught treatment like all of the students, and when she reverted not to Mad-Eye Moody but instead to a supposedly deceased Death Eater he was immediately arrested and sentenced to the Dementor's Kiss. Alastor Moody himself was rescued from the trunk where he had been held, suffering from severe dehydration and malnutrition. After a recuperative stay in St. Mungos he returned to his duties as a member of the Order of the Phoenix, although not without occasional joking from the members about his 'veela heritage'.

Voldemort never came back from the dead, but eventually tales were whispered of the Dark Lady, as beautiful as she was terrifying, charming helpless men to do her bidding with a mere glance, and cursing or killing all who resisted. Eventually she was defeated by Fleur Delacour in a duel of feathers and fireballs. It wasn't clear why she could be taken down by anyone but Harry, but when asked Dumbledore admitted that "prophecies are fickle things."

As for Harry Potter, he returned to the Dursleys, but he was in good spirits. While he was unallowed to use any magic while out of school, what they didn't know was he had figured out what had happened shortly after the start of the transformations, and had saved a glass of the Polyjuice Potioned pumpkin juice. He was looking forward to making his relatives a bit more pleasant to be with, or at least more pleasant on the eyes.