DeRanged: I realized that I forgot to post a disclaimer due to how long it's been since I've posted on the site so here it is:

DISCLAIMER: I do not own either Lord of the Rings or the Hobbit, that was all J.R.R. Tolkiens doing…besides if I had written them the men would be with men ;)

PROLOGUE: TALES OF ADVENTURES PAST

Frodo sat excitedly before the large door that led into his home at Bag End, waiting for the return of his Uncle who had set out not a week before to the Misty Mountains with the promise of return on this very day: Frodo's birthday. The tween had been excited all morning and had even denied his Uncle Bilbo the chance at throwing him a large, typical Hobbit party as Frodo had wanted to spend it with his two Uncles alone. But seeing the sun falling quickly below the horizon had sadness creeping into the tween's heart though this did not deter him from keeping constant vigilance from his perch, his Uncle never broke a promise. The young child kept his eyes stubbornly trained on the path that came through a small patch of trees; and even as fireflies came out to dance upon the air with their partners and the lanterns burst to life in a flash of yellow flame in response to the approaching darkness, still Frodo did not move.

The boy's silent vigil was brought to an end only when the round, green door opened suddenly to reveal his Uncle Bilbo cast in shadow because of the light pouring out from the hobbit hole behind the elder of the pair. "Still waiting my little adventurer?" the Hobbit's clear, musical tenor rang out into the night caressing the young Hobbit's ears and bringing forth memories of lullabies in the darkness and tales by the fire. The light of a newly lit lantern beside the door brought Bilbo's face into sharp contrast showing still youthful features with laugh lines beginning to appear and graying caramel hair that fell about his pointed ears in a cascade of silky curls.

Bright, clear blue eyes turned away from the path for the first time that day, focusing their entire attention on their Uncle that stood over them, "He promised to be back today!" the newly made tween muttered, a pout beginning to form on his features.

A warm chuckle echoed about the small garden that framed the ground between the front gate and the entrance to Bag End where the elderly Hobbit moved away to sit beside his nephew on the top step, "So he did and so he shall be, however you must show some patience. Come inside for dinner now Frodo, you know he would be angry if you caused yourself to go hungry in his absence. Perhaps if you eat time will fly and he will be home in time for some last minute cake and bedtime, hm?" Bilbo wrapped a loving arm around the slumped shoulders of the tween.

Frodo appeared torn as he glanced between the open door of their hobbit hole with its seductive warmth and smells of delicious food and the darkened path that would lead his Uncle back home to them. Finally, coming to a decision he gave one last mournful sigh before standing and turning to go back into Bag End to wash up for supper and eat with his Uncle, wishing his other Uncle would be there soon, his shoulders slumped in defeat that he wouldn't be there waiting on his Uncle as he had promised.

A deep, rumbling voice from before their front gate had him frozen mid-step no longer conscious of the warm hand of Bilbo on his shoulder, "Surely I haven't been gone so long that my own nephew would be too angry to give me a welcome home hug!"

With a gasp of concealed hope Frodo spun on his heel to be greeted with the sight of twinkling blue eyes that were framed by braided ebony locks that held streaks of silver and broad shoulders covered in a familiar fur coat. With a shout of absolute joy and delight Frodo rushed down the path to the gate, wrenching it open to throw himself into the broad, leather-covered chest of his returned Uncle. The tween felt a rumble in the dwarf's chest as his Uncle chuckled and this only caused Frodo's grin to widen.

He heard the deep baritone of his Uncle's voice and the corresponding rumble in the man's chest as he spoke, "And a kiss from my loving husband would not be remiss," the teasing in the dwarf's tone was obvious.

With a laugh the Hobbit came forward and placed a warm and welcoming peck on his husband's lips, pulling back too early for the other man's liking. With a grunt the weary traveler untangled one of his arms form his nephew, using it to pull the Hobbit back to him for a longer, more passionate kiss. Frodo giggled where he was between the two men that had taken him in and become the closest things to fathers the tween had ever had since his own had drowned in the Brandywine with his mother. Slowly the two men pulled back for much needed air, both their lips pulled up in loving, fond smiles as their eyes met and shared words that no one but them could understand.

"So what have you been up to, my young nephew, on this important day?" the dwarf asked, hitching the young tween high in his arms while keeping one wrapped firmly around his husband's waist as they all made their way through the door that had remained open and into the warmth and aromas of a freshly cooked meal.

With that simple question Frodo was off, rattling about his day as well as the week the man had missed out on while on his journey. He spun tales of he and his cousins', Merry and Pippen, misadventures outrunning Farmer Maggot's dogs with their arms full of the treasured crops. He continued on and on as they washed up and even as they sat at the table only pausing to take bites of the delicious food his other Uncle had prepared and to take much needed breaths between his long winded sentences. He was just getting into his explanation of his new friendship with the gardener's son, Samwise Gamgee, when his Hobbit Uncle interrupted to explain that Hamfast had been bringing his son with him to work the past week as his wife had traveled to the other side of the Shire to help her sister birth their coming nephew/niece.

When the aging Hobbit finished explaining the air was filled once more with Frodo's excited voice and the tween's tales continued through dinner. His dwarf Uncle gasping and nodding at the right points having had years of practice with his other two nephews as they grew up. The gentle Hobbit watched his husband and the boy that had quickly become his son in all but birth with a fond smile as he ate silently, glad to see Frodo in such an exuberant mood once more; the young tween had been slowly getting quieter and more despondent with each passing day of his husband's absence.

As dinner was winding to an end both men saw that the young Hobbit would be far to wound up to go straight to bed and exchanged knowing glances that they had perfected with years of practice. The elder Hobbit spoke up softly, standing to clear the plates from the table, "Frodo my lad, go wash up and prepare for bed then come back into the sitting room."

Frodo's face brightened even more, if it were possible and the young tween gave a whoop knowing exactly what was in store. He jumped up from his seat, just barely catching the chair before it fell with a clatter to the floor and was soon seen sprinting out of the room. The only time he was told to go to the sitting room this late was when his Uncles told him a bedtime story and both were marvelous storytellers, even better than Grandpa Gandalf! When the young tween's footsteps could no longer be heard the dwarf was across the dining room and had his arms around his shorter husband in an instant, resting his chin on the Hobbit's curls while his hands rested on the man's abdomen.

The dwarf's One smiled, finally at peace once more, hands still in the soapy water as he cleaned dishes, leaning back slightly into his husband's muscled chest reveling in the sense of safety and warmth the dwarf's arms always seemed to give him, "We missed you while you were away, love," the Hobbit whispered, closing his eyes to absorb the pleasure that came as the dwarf began to pepper kisses down his neck, the dwarf's beard scratching pleasingly about where his lips met the Hobbit's skin, "I couldn't sleep when you weren't there holding me."

"I missed you as well," the dwarf whispered huskily in the Hobbit's sensitive ear, licking the shell as he thrust his hips into the Hobbit's backside, revealing the obvious erection the dwarf held, "but I am afraid you won't be getting much sleep tonight my little burglar."

"Thorin!" Bilbo gasped; he had to fight off a moan as his sensitive ears were assaulted by a skilled tongue and he felt his husband's well endowed member being thrust into his backside in shallow thrusts, aching to have it deep within him. But Frodo was in the next room and would be returning soon.

Quickly untangling himself from the dwarves muscled arms Bilbo turned quickly to shoot a reprimanding glare at his husband, knowing it wouldn't work because he was too worked up and his hard on was quite obvious in the worn trousers he had picked to wear before bed. Thorin gave him a sly smile that proved once more to Bilbo that Fili and Kili were indeed Thorin's nephews as the former King Under the Mountain's smile was almost identical to the two mischievous brothers that had traveled with them years before.

"Just warning you my soul," the dwarf said, his voice lower than Bilbo could remember and as a result an obvious shiver of lust raced down the Hobbit's spine.

Shaking his head in hopes of clearing it of lustful thoughts of stripping the former king there and letting the dwarf take him on the table Bilbo went to reprimand the man only to be interrupted by the very tween he had feared would barrel in on the scene of them in a precarious position. Frodo was bouncing excitedly with wide, expectant eyes that seemed to beg them to hurry. Smiling lovingly at his nephew Bilbo gestured for the boy to go into the sitting room while huffing irritated at Thorin and turning his nose up to the dwarf which only seemed to cause the head of the Durin line amusement. Drying his hands Bilbo walked forward and lifted Frodo into his arms and walked into the sitting room, giving a bit more swing to his hips playfully knowing his husband would be watching.

Thorin's eyes darkened lustfully at the sight of his lover's slim hips and ample rear swinging tauntingly before him, but he couldn't help but chuckle as he followed the two men in his life he would truly die without. He came to see Bilbo sitting in the loveseat with Frodo in his lap, the spot beside him so obviously empty and meant for him that it warmed Thorin's heart further and he couldn't help but pause and take in the happy sight of his family.

It was Frodo that broke him from his peace by shouting excitedly for him to hurry, the tween really wanted to hear another story tonight! Giving a warm laugh that had quickly become common place when he married the Hobbit staring at him slyly over his nephew's shoulder and when the very boy urging him to hurry to his seat turned those wide, innocent orbs onto him.

Taking off his fur and armor first Thorin was left in his black trousers and a familiar, worn blue tunic that only seemed to make his eyes pop even more. His arms were left bare as he rolled up the sleeves to the tunic and removed his pipe and some Longbottom leaf from his jacket pocket and moving to sit beside his loved ones. When he sat down Frodo wiggled about until he was sitting a bit on each of his Uncles' laps and was snuggled in each of their arms feeling loved and treasured as he always did between the two.

"What shall it be tonight my little adventurer?" Thorin asked, placing his pipe aside in exchange for holding his husband and nephew, more like adopted son, closer to him and settling down to begin any tale the little Hobbit in his lap requested of him.

The dwarf felt Bilbo's head rest on his shoulder as Frodo seemed to debate over what tale he wished to hear most that night. The silence was only disturbed by the cracking of the logs in the hearth as the fire blazed merrily as it had the first time Thorin had come to Bag End, but on much different ground and with many other emotions but the peace, love, and warmth that filled him now.

Suddenly, Frodo's head shot up with his idea and he grinned as he exclaimed, "I want to know about you and Uncle Bilbo's first adventure together!"

Bilbo snorted from where he snuggled into the firm shoulder of his dwarvin husband, the boy would choose the longest one to tell. Thorin shared his amusement as he let out a short chuckle before beginning to speak, not really bothered as the boy in their laps shifted around a bit to be able to see both of them but remain comfortably in their arms.

"You already know how my kingdom, Erebor, fell to Smaug the Terrible and how my hatred for elves and Azog the Defiler came to be. The adventure your Uncle Bilbo and I went on was to regain my home and my throne beneath the mountain, but I believe Bilbo would tell it better than I," Thorin said snickering slightly at the exasperated look Bilbo had sent him beneath his lashes.

Rolling his eyes at his husband Bilbo looked down to meet Frodo's crystalline orbs and began his tale, "It began…well it began as you would expect it to, in a hole in the ground," Bilbo's voice had a lulling quality that put both his favorite boys at peace as they settle down to listen, "there lived a retired treasure hunter who took refuge from darker memories in his father's home…."