Only fools would want to get involved with me.
I told her that.
And she just... smiled. Stealing the sun out of the sky to give it to me. To bless me with her warmth and beauty. Oblivious to the rest of the world, she granted me a heavenly kiss.
I've tried, Albus, but she wouldn't listen. And now the traces are left. In the room our clothes are laying anywhere. Tonight there had been no time for civilization.
But the deepest traces are left in my soul. In spite of the decisions she's going to make once she wakes up, she'll forever be a part of me.
I take another look at her. It's weird, seeing her here, laying on my bed. Her light skin, barely covered by the blankets, seems to glow in the light. Her brown hair lays in waves on her shoulder, and her whole being held a purity that I have never come across before.
She's the opposite of what I am, and the worst thing is that she doesn't realize that. She has no idea of the awful things I've done. But I can't make her realize that, Albus, I really can't. That would mean taking away her innocence, her beauty. I can't do that, and I won't allow anyone else to do that.
And then she wakes up, and her wonderful eyelashes flutter open. She seems puzzled, finding herself in a bed that isn't her own. I just watch her silently. Noticing she's naked, she grabs for the blanket and quickly covers her body.
Then she looks up and notices me. Her delicious chocolate brown eyes meet mine, and she flushes. I do not smile. Nothing funny has happened.
"Good morning," she mutters, and for a moment, I do not know how to react.
"Morning," I say eventually, my voice as cold and unfriendly as ever.
Obviously she's surprised I'm already dressed. What does she know... I've been watching her for a few hours now, trying to make up my mind.
"How are you?" she then asks uncomfortably, trying to break the silence.
I search her eyes quietly, and she quickly looks away. But the split second she did let me look in her eyes was enough for me to see it.
She regrets it, Albus, and I can't blame her. I should've known this was just a one-time thing, and nothing more. And I knew.
I stand up, for the first time in hours moving from my place. I jerk my head into the direction of the exit. "You can use my bathroom," I say, ignoring her question.
She looks up at me, grateful and relieved at the same time, and slowly slips out of my bed, still clutching on the blanket. Silently, and slightly embarrassed, she walks past me out of the room.
I sit down back in my chair, and by the time she has finished, I have decided what to do.
She returns in one of my oldest robes, and I guess that that hasn't been incidental. So modest, so innocent.
"Is it okay if I, er, borrow your robe?" she asks quietly.
I give her a penetrating look. Such modesty, again. Not wanting to give her an even harder time, I give a nod.
I see her hesitate, and softly grab her arm. "I'll walk you out," I murmur, and she doesn't dare to object. When we arrive at the door, she turns to me, obviously not knowing what to do or say.
It is awkward, and so I touch her cheek with one hand softly, while reaching for my wand with the other. I bow forward and kiss her forehead tenderly. "I love you, dearest," I whisper, but before she can realize what I'm saying I cast the charm.
A blast of light, and a dull expression appears on her face. I'm standing on a safe distance now, and send a glare her way.
"May I ask what you're doing here, Miss Granger?" I growl. She blinks a few times, and looks around. Her face turns red again.
"I don't know, sir, I'm very sorry," she says, and as I just give her a surprised look, she quickly turns around to run out of the dungeons. I stare after her, into the darkness.
I'm sorry, Albus, but I had to do that. For me, for the school.
I had to protect her innocence, her purity, you know that.
Please understand, she's the opposite of what I am. I've erased the visible traces, Albus. But the deepest traces are left in my soul. In spite of the decision I've made for her, she'll forever be a part of me. I know I'll survive. And I know that, now, she will, too. I had to do it, Albus, and I know you will understand.
Because you're a fool, just like me.