Harry's Australian Adventure
Ron had made a serious mistake when he had abandoned Harry and Hermione. He had given the hyper-intelligent witch an ultimatum - she could come with him, abandoning Harry to his fate, or she could stay with the Boy-Who-Lived and he would be done with the both of them. He had been so certain she would beg to come with him that when she had pitched his trunk out of the tent, tore the deluminator from his belt, literally shoved him out of the tent, and then sealed the flaps, he hadn't known what to do at first. Eventually he had made it back to The Burrow.
After the hunt for the Horcruxes had ended and Harry had definitively slain the self-proclaimed Lord Voldemort, Ron knew she'd come back to him. Needless to say, he was stunned nearly senseless when Hermione and Harry explained to the two youngest Weasleys and their matriarch that neither held any affection for the two youngest and that any ill will directed at either Harry or Hermione would be met with extreme prejudice.
The two then further shocked the Weasleys when they slapped copies of both The Daily Prophet and The Quibbler on their dining table and apparated straight through the wards surrounding The Burrow.
Molly quickly unfolded The Daily Prophet, read the headline, and promptly fainted. Ginny had much the same reaction. Ron read it, his faced cycled from pale to red then to purple before he promptly fell over dead from a burst vessel in his brain's temporal lobe. He hadn't even had time to cry out.
Arthur, the Weasley patriarch, could only presume Ron had sworn some type of magical vow and, something in headline had caused his attitude towards his one-time friends to violate that vow. Arthur picked up the Prophet and read the headline – "Man-Who-Won Marries Long-Time Love" and the article went on to describe how Harry and Hermione had wed the previous day, their vows officiated by the new Minister For Magic, Kingsley Shacklebolt.
Harry and Hermione, neither knowing nor caring about Ron's sudden and unexpected demise, were onboard Cunard Lines' Caronia bound for Adelaide to begin the search for Hermione's parents, whom she had told everyone who had asked that she had obliviated.
On their first night out of port, Hermione had tearfully admitted to Harry that, when the time had come to obliviate them, she could not bring herself to do so out of respect and love for them. She had essentially told them that, should they ever wish to see their daughter alive again, they had to leave for Australia that very evening.
It had been at Hermione's insistence they consummate their vows that same evening. It was two days later they had emerged from their suite to see the night sky for the first time without the light pollution from urban Europe dimming the stars to obscurity. It was truly a breathtaking sight to behold and, with her passion renewed upon seeing the Milky Way galaxy in all its glory, Hermione had dragged Harry back to their suite, where they sequestered themselves on the balcony, making love all night long beneath the stars.
Harry had decided that, since the future was still far too unknown, they had to visit the sites of Australia at least once in their lives. While Hermione shopped aboard ship, Harry read up on everything he could find on board to ensure that he and Hermione would have a honeymoon to fondly remember for many years to come, and possibly take his in-laws with them to get to know them better. That is, of course, if Hermione's parents didn't kill him outright for marrying their daughter without their presence.
They found Hermione's parents and, with deep sighs of relief, Jacqueline and Christopher loved Harry and were understanding that there had been no reasonable way they could have waited to get married due to the complexities and vagaries of Magical Europe following the downfall of Tom Riddle. They did insist upon paying for a proper, muggle wedding for Hermione and Harry upon their return to England. Of course they agreed that the four of them should have an opportunity to spend time together playing tourist while still in Australia.
Unfortunately, on their first day sightseeing, Harry began to suffer from a severe headache. Thinking it was probably just the unfamiliar air, or something he had eaten, he took two aspirin and continued their tour.
The headache didn't go away, however, so he asked Hermione the best place to go for treatment as his headache was now blinding both his concentration and his memory.
"Harry-Love, we will want to go to the emergency room at Mercy Hospital for Magical Maladies", she told him. "It is not far from here."
At the hospital, the healer insisted he remain overnight for observation and he agreed after some insistent urging from Hermione and her parents. He was assigned a room and a nun, who was an assistant healer came in to see him. He was surprised when she explained that, in Australia, New Zealand, and Tazmania, the orders within the Catholic Church were well aware of their magical cousins and often assisted them with research and could often be found in the magical hospitals and clinics throughout the Oceania.
When he told her about his headache, she asked him if he had tried the hospital's specially brewed tea – a potion, essentially, brewed of water from a magical well and a rather odd local ingredient.
"It is made from the fur of the Koala bear and has great healing properties", she said.
Harry said he was willing to try anything at that point and asked that she bring him a cup.
Presently, the nun came back in with a cup of liquid.
He thanked her and took the cup. Drinking it down to the dregs in one go, he smiled as he felt the pain in his head fade away almost instantly. He then noticed an oddity and looked in the cup. There he saw it had a mass of hair in the bottom.
Feeling rather nauseous, Harry nearly regurgitated. Swallowing back his bile, he looked incredulously at the nun.
"It's filled with hair! Couldn't you have strained it out or something?!" he asked.
The nun was indignant. She said, "Sir, I'll have you know the Koala tea of Mercy is not strained!"
Harry had no idea what he had done to deserve such punishment, but vowed to leave Australia before Jacqueline made him hasenpfeffer stew, as he had no intention of finding a hare in his soup.