i. sometimes you see the world in red because that's how you were raised
blood and pain and unclean hands that you were told were just fine
the colour of the flag you were made to spill blood for
whether it was your own, or more often, not
the colour of your hair when they let you keep it that way
not often
because they couldn't have you becoming your own person
now you change it as often as you want
because you're done being someone else
someone else's
'do you know what it's like to be unmade?'

ii. you see blue, the same shade that changed you
and you hate it because it reminds you
of everything you couldn't help
and you still think
maybe you could have
and it eats you up inside
you see it still
when you look in the mirror
because even though he's gone from your head, he looks back at you
and it takes you a while to remember you're alone inside
and you're not sure it that makes it better or worse
'you know I do'

iii. together, purple
the colour of
royalty and nobility
and fading pain in the form of bruises
of healing slowly as the blood gets cleaned away and things go back to normal
'nothing we were ever trained for'