Disclaimer: Do you think this would just be fanfiction if I owned this?
Laura led Wade through the back entrance again, and she showed him the back way to get to the kitchen while avoiding the main halls where everyone was gathered. She poured two mugs of hot chocolate from the large carafe sitting on the counter, and she handed Wade one. He took it and pulled his mask up just enough to allow him to take a sip before replacing it.
"This is good and all, but do you have any rum?" Wade asked.
"Logan has some in his office." Laura replied.
Laura handed Wade an empty plate and grabbed one for herself and stepped up to the counter where the holiday dinner lay untouched as of yet. She piled her plate with a variety of foods, while Wade took a quarter of the ham for himself along with as much of everything else that he could fit on his plate. He followed her back out of the room and through the mansion passed off as a school until they reached Logan's office. Laura sat in Logan's chair and watched Wade set his stuff down before going through Logan's collection of liquor. He picked up a large bottle of spiced rum and mixed it in with his hot chocolate until it reached the brim. He offered some to Laura, who declined, before taking a long drink from the bottle and returning it to its rightful place. Wade sat across from Laura and dug into their food.
Wade rambled on during their meal, from asking questions to filling the void with unnecessary chatter. Laura remained silent mostly, only speaking when the occasion called for it. After the two finished their meals, they remained where they were.
"So you're Old and Ugly's daughter?" Wade asked.
"No, I am his clone, though he has legally adopted me." She replied.
"Okay, and you're how old?" He asked and then added. "Not that it matters to me. Age ain't nothing but a number."
"Nineteen." Laura answered.
"Good that means Grumpy is the only one who can hurt me. No jailtime! Wooo!" He shouted and pumped his fists in the air.
Laura raised an eyebrow but remained silent.
"Real talk though," He rested his arm against the desk and turned to the side. "What's a girl like you do to keep all the guys like me away?"
Snikt! He watched with a grin as her claws came out and then he said, "Now, see that just excites me, so that's not the answer to my question."
Before Laura could retort, the door to the office pushed open and Jubilee froze in the door way, looking between the two trained killers. "X . . ."
"I am fine. He is keeping me company." Laura replied before she could even utter the rest of her sentence.
"You never ask for company." Jubilee watched Deadpool carefully as he stole a piece of ham of Laura's plate.
"It seems with him, you get the company regardless if one asked or not." Laura replied and slid her plate closer to the masked man.
"Hey, you enjoyed playing with me, and you know it!" He argued.
Laura's brow furrowed in lines before smoothing out as she turned back to Jubilee. "Did you require me for something?"
"Uh . . . yeah. Logan asked me to find you so you could exchange gifts with everyone." Jubilee explained.
"I did not get a gift for anyone," Laura replied.
"Well some of us got gifts for you," Jubilee said.
"Did anyone get me presents?" Wade put a hand to his chest.
Jubilee shook her head and stepped out of the room. Laura rose and followed her out, and Wade gathered her plate in his hands and followed after her, eating as they walked through the halls to the main room.
Wade let Laura lead him to the corner of the room where she was comfortable to observe the festivities. After a moment of watching many of her acquaintances be joyous over their gifts, Laura found herself more interested in observing Wade, who was at the moment most interested in cleaning her plate. Once the food was gone, he sat her plate to the side and took a sip from his mug of spiked hot chocolate. He looked to her, just now realizing she was watching him. He opened his mouth, ready to ask why she was staring, but just then he noticed the faintest of smiles crossing her lips. She pointed above his head to the mistletoe dangling above his head. Before he knew what was happening, she leaned in and kissed him on the lips. He thought it would just be a quick peck but she hesitated from pulling away and it even felt like maybe she kissed him just a little bit harder, like maybe she knew just exactly what to do. He started to kiss her back, but just as his arm was encircling her back, time stopped with one thunderous roar.
"WILSON!" Logan's voice shook the whole room, even the tree beside them. "Get your damn hands off her!"
Wade jerked back and looked at Logan across the room. The tiny man's face was bright red, and his claws were out. He looked like he might've grown three sizes. Wade glanced back to Laura.
"Merry X-mas." She spoke softly so no one else would hear except for those with preternatural hearing. "I would run now if I were you."
Wade grinned and shrugged. "Nah, this is what I live for. We should pick this up later though."
Laura smiled again and shrugged before she walked away and back down the hall.
"Wait, what does that mean? Laura?" Wade shouted after her, ignoring the furious Wolverine running toward him as Laura disappeared from his view.
"I'm gonna kill you, Wade!" Logan growled just as he barreled into the fully suited man and tackled him to the ground. "Pixie, take down that damn mistletoe!"
"Ah, just what I look forward to every year!" Wade announced with a proud smile and drew one of his katanas.
A/N: Yes, this is the final chapter. Merry Christmas! This was just a one off, so I do not believe I will be continuing this story into a series as I currently have my other main series I'm working on. If you are interested in reading more antics of Deadpool and X-23 as portrayed by me, you can check out my other story Trials of Blood, which is the beginning of my main series. I hope you enjoyed reading this. It was just fun to write and kind of an excuse to have Deadpool say Christmas Pick Up lines to X-23.