Missed Opportunities

A/N: So it seemed as if there was a lot of tension between Oliver and Felicity when he was packing up to go meet Ra's. I usually feel the need to stay within cannon when I write, so I saw this little scene between them. It started out as something quite different, and then the last episode came out and it now longer worked for me so the ending I envisioned changed.


She missed it. The intimacy between them, the casual touch that said it was okay to be close. They had something special together, and now it was something else. He'd told her that she needed to move on. Well, sort of. He'd told her that he could never give her what she needed and in her mind, that meant she should stop clinging to an impossible dream. He couldn't see that Oliver and the Arrow were one and the same, and if he didn't want to see it, she couldn't make him. She tried to move on. She'd meant it when she told Ray she wanted more. She did. But Oliver… he didn't make it easy. The sincerity behind his oh-so-blue eyes was borderline painful. His words always were.

"Do what you want."

That's what he'd told her when she said she was going to dinner with Ray. Really? She wanted Oliver. She wanted Oliver to fight for her, but he wouldn't. Told himself he couldn't. He wouldn't fight for himself, how could she expect him to fight for her? When Ray kissed her, she kissed him back. She deserved to have a life. She didn't want to die with Oliver, hiding behind his hood, body laid out on a slab or cooling in the freezer while they decided how to bury him. She'd never have to worry about Ray like that. She couldn't imagine him doing the reckless things that Oliver did. When it was over, when he broke off their kiss, she'd seen regret in Ray's eyes. She knew how to pick them, didn't she?

She was still thinking about Ray when she left the building, which is why she had to ask the security guard to repeat what he'd said to her as she'd exited.

"Did Mr. Queen catch you?"

"I'm sorry, what?"

"Mr. Queen. He was just here, looking for you. I sent him up to your office," he frowned, "I didn't see him leave."

"Oh."

Her heart clenched. Had he seen her kissing Ray? It shouldn't matter. It shouldn't, but it did. Well, what now? Oliver would never tell her if he'd seen, and she was pretty sure he had seen something, or he would have stopped into her office. He'd just give her those sad regretful eyes and go on as if nothing had happened. She told Diggle it was up to Oliver to fix this, but knowing Oliver, the timing would never be right. He'd said so himself.

She ended up at the foundry, but Oliver wasn't there. Maybe that was for the best. She didn't know what she was going to say when she saw him. She only hoped he wasn't out on the streets without backup. He'd been doing that a lot lately, ever since Sara. She sat behind her computer, intent on making some headway into their investigation, and laid her head down during a search just for a moment.

Felicity smiled as warm arms encircled her. She snuggled deeper, inhaling the scent of leather and spice that was Oliver. It was one of her favorite dreams, and she decided to stay in it a little longer if she could. They shared little enough closeness these days, and even if it wasn't real, she still missed it. Since she'd walked away from him in that hospital corridor, Oliver had hardly come near her, much less gotten close enough for her to breathe him in. If there was a chance for them, she'd have taken it, but there wasn't. Not while Oliver refused to let them try. She wasn't going to think about that, not now. Not while she was pressed up against the hard wall of his chest, his stubble scratching her cheek. She smiled; this dream was especially vivid. Maybe she'd even get a happy ending with this one. She felt her zipper digging into her back. A beat later, her eyes opened, realizing that there was vivid dream and there was vivid real. Oh, god. Oliver was putting her down on his bed. This was really happening. She tried not to tense, but her felt her shift into wakefulness.

"You were asleep at your desk. I just thought…" he shook his head, "You looked uncomfortable. Why are you down here? You took the night off."

She blinked away the remaining confusion and sat up. Oliver shifted back on the little bed and then and stood, again putting space between them. She shivered a little, her source of warmth in the damp basement gone. She licked her lips nervously and stared down at her lap. Now or never.

She raised her head and looked him in the eyes, "I heard you came by the office looking for me, but I didn't see you there. I thought you might be here."

Oliver's expression closed, his mask firmly in place. Why did he do that when he should know she could see right through him? He'd seen Ray kiss her. The question was, what was he going to do about it? She frowned. By the looks of it, nothing.

He shrugged a shoulder, "I must have just missed you." His eyes locked on hers, "I was a little too late."

Regret, sadness, acceptance. It was the acceptance that bothered her most.

"You saw."

He swallowed hard, nodded once. "You deserve to be happy." He turned away from her, busied himself at his work table, "I don't have a right to get in the way of that, no matter how I feel about it," he cut his eyes back to her, piercingly clear, "about you."

Felicity swung her legs off the bed and stood, "What about how I feel about it?"

He froze, flattened his hands against the table and shook his head, "Felicity—"

She strode over to him, invaded his space and forced him to look at her, "No, Oliver. Tell me what you had to say."

His eyes shuttered, the emotions locked up behind a solid wall he seldom used for her, "It doesn't matter."

She pressed her lips together. He wasn't going to tell her, and if he did, it would be a lie.

"Fine, then let me tell you something." She poked him in the chest with her forefinger, "You are the one that ended it. You are going to have to be the one to change that, but expecting me to wait around while you figure it out isn't fair."

He nodded and stepped away, "I know."

She grit her teeth, infuriated, "Then tell me what you had to say now, or not at all."

Oliver sighed, his shoulders dropping in defeat. He opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out.

The door to the foundry slammed open, Roy's heavy footfalls breaking the heavy silence.

Felicity's bottom lip trembled, "I guess that means not at all."

Oliver shook his head, "I—"

Roy looked back and forth between them, "Am I interrupting something?"

"No," Felicity said, leveling a hard look at Oliver, "I was just leaving."

END


Notes:

Thanks so much for reading! This turned out a little more angsty than I'd hoped, but so are they. Comments feed poor hardworking muses. ;)