I'm Back Guys! Happy New Year of 2018!
Imagine believing something that you know to be true. As true as the sun rising every morning. That's the amount of belief I put into what I saw that day. Imagine knowing that the sun will rise in fact every morning but one day it doesn't rise. But that's impossible.
But so was this.
I never thought that one day Alia would be sitting in front of her father.
With the fact in mind that the sun would not rise today because this was impossible and so was that.
But I promised Alia that I didn't want to get in the way of her happiness. And look at me, I almost did just that.
If it wasn't for my mom he wouldn't be here to meet her right now.
Just us three.
"Listen, I know I haven't been here for you, and I'm sorry for that" Jace started, he looked at me briefly.
My eyes began to tear up.
I can't believe that I was so wrong about everything.
"But I am here now and I don't plan on leaving anytime soon" he said as he turned back to Alia.
My head shot up at those words as I sat on the bed.
"You're staying?" I asked.
"Of course, I'm staying Clary, I just found you both, you can't get rid of me that easily" he said with a sly smile.
"A daughter" Jace whispered as he caressed Alia's face as the say across each other on the chair.
"You have your mother's hair, that's for sure" he smiled as Alia giggled nodding.
"You have your mother's beautiful nose, and my high cheek bones" he commented lovingly.
"Your eyes "he whispered, "What a true treasure, I see now what those golden flecks everybody is talking about now. Emerald with golden flecks" Jace spoke as he turned towards me.
Alia turned her head to look at me too.
Jace and our daughter.
17 years of their lives that I've taken away.
I feel terrible.
"I'm so sorry" I croaked out.
Before I completely fell apart I stood up and made my way to the door.
"I…. I'll be right back" I said as my voice trembled.
As soon as the door opened I practically ran out.
In the hallway the twins stood, I cast my eyes down and walked to the nearest bathroom locking myself in for a moment.
Just to gather myself.
At my age and my profession, I should be done with crying by now. But I sometimes I still feel like that 21-year-old girl with her world closing around her.
"We didn't say anything about mama Fray, did we?" Jett asked as he looked to Ace.
"Man, this guy is really pushing his luck" Ace stated with a frown.
He's everything I imagined him to be. Mom was right, he looks like a golden Adonis. The paintings she painted of him doesn't do him justice. Of course, I'm not entirely supposed to know about said paintings but what can I say, mom should find a better place to hide it.
"You're everything I imagined you to be" my dad said as he embraced me.
I haven't had a father in so long, I don't even know how to process this all.
I was so nervous about meeting him and the whole thing with mom. I don't even know what to think, but right now in this moment, I couldn't feel happier. Finally, I have both of my parents here with me. I wouldn't have thought that this would have happened in a million years.
"You are too" I smiled sitting back.
That's when I noticed the chip in his tooth.
I smiled at that, even he still has a quirky imperfection.
"I should probably go talk to mom" I said as I stood up.
"Yeah, that's probably the best decision" he said as he raked a hand through his golden hair.
Him and Duke really could look like father and son.
It's so crazy.
"You know" said right before I opened the bedroom door to the hallway.
"It may take time… But mom will come around" I said looking at him.
"You really think so?" he asked with what seemed like hope in his voice.
"I really do" I said with a smile.
It may be foolish of me to say something like this but I believe in the power of attraction. If I want it enough and believe in it enough it will manifest into a reality.
"I really do" I said once more as I made my way out.
"Mom?" I asked as I knocked my knuckles against the bathroom door.
"Are you okay?" I asked.
"I'm fine… I just need a moment" she replied.
I looked down the hall to see the twins staring at me.
I motioned for them to go and that I got it.
As they turned to leave Jace came out of the room.
"She's okay" I said as he began to approach me as I stood in front of the bathroom door.
"She just needs a minute" I smiled trying to reassure him.
"Don't worry about it, Grandma made some cookies and we should be heading back home soon" I said making that the plan for tonight.
"Okay, sounds good. Just… Just let me know if there's anything can do" he said with a small smile.
"I will" I reassured him as I motioned for him to follow the twins to the kitchen.
Grandma came up just as Jace rounded the corner with the twins.
She came and met me by the door engulfing me in a huge hug I didn't know I needed.
"You're so strong" she whispered as she stroked my hair lovingly.
She smelled of fragranced jasmine flowers.
"Thanks grandma" I whispered as tears began to threaten to pour.
God all these emotions flowing through me is driving me crazy. A hug is exactly what I need right now.
"Clary, open up the door" Grandma said as she released me from her magical jasmine smelling curing hugs.
The door opened and we both walked in and sat with my mom on the white porcelain bathroom floor.
Grandma sat in-between mom and I and wrapped her arms around both of us.
"My girls" she whispered lovingly while rubbing our arms, "So many emotions you both have been going through, I can feel it all the way to my bones."
"Is it because of Mr. Jace Lightwood?" she asked her tone dipped slightly upwards at the last name.
Mom and I both nodded our head in agreement.
"Now doesn't this bring back memories" Grandma chuckled softly.
I looked at her confused, this was the first time I swear.
Sensing my confusion and with a sigh mom answered, "She means me… I don't know how many times I cried in a bathroom over him."
"And I remember last time you said you would never cry over him again" Grandma stated as we all leaned against the bath tub now looking at the door as we sat on the floor tiles.
"Yeah well I cried twice already. That promise is long broken mom" my mom said with a small sniffle and roll of her eyes.
"I… I just feel so terrible…" Mom sighed sadly.
"I brought this mess on myself and for what? For my daughter to miss out on 17 years of her father just because I thought he cheated on me? I'm the one who broke them apart."
Turning to me my mother apologized, "Baby I'm so sorry that I stood in front of your happiness and your dreams. I know how much you want a complete family. And I failed you as a mother. I am so sorry".
I knew how torn up she would be about this. Sure, it was partially her fault but we're only humans. We're bound to mess up every once in a while. Plus, she's my mom I know that everything she does is for my benefit.
"It's okay mom. You didn't know. I forgive you" I smiled gripping her hand with my free hand.
"It's not your fault anymore Clary. I know it's hard but we have to move on from this and continue to push forward. It's not good to dwell on the past. It's only going to eat you up at night sweetie" Grandma said trying to comfort mom.
"She's right mom, we can let it go. It'll help us move forward."
"I know and I'm trying to. I… I just need a little time… I promise we I will let it go and move forward" she said squeezing my hand.
"Of course, take all the time you need mom" I smiled.
"My two girls" grandma smiled as she kissed our temples, mom first then me.
"So, strong, so passionate. I love you both so much" she said.
"We love you too" mom and I smiled.
Both of us stood as we helped my grandma up.
"You girls have got this" grandma smiled as she patted my cheek and my mom's.
"I believe in you both and I know things will turn out for the better".
"Now, let's go conquer the world" she said leading us out of the bathroom to the hall.
"First, let's eat some cookies. Sound good?" she asked as we rounded the corner to the kitchen.
"Sounds perfect" mom and I said in unison.
Grandma was right. We got this.
What a birthday this was turning out to be.
Hey guys! I hope you enjoyed that update! It's been so long since I wrote and i finally seemed to pull through for a little chapter update! Please review! Let me know what you think, help me in the direction of how i should take things! Help me better my writing! It's been so long and I'm so excited to be back! I can't thank you enough for the support and love guys! Thank you so much for reading!