Slight AU. HP/SM While Draco had been rummaging around in Snape's desk for possible blackmail, he picked created an accident with a Time Turner that took him 1000 years into the past! Not only that, but he's on the MOON! Now, with only the aid of Harry Potter, who managed to get sucked up with Malfoy, they've got to get back home. But in the process, he manages to anger a princess named Haruka, who is also the Captain of the Guard! Hoo- boy! Malfoy, Potter, *WHAT* have you gotten yourselves into?


Insanity of the Past

Chapter One: Time is a Fickle Thing

By: Kolinshar Jackie-chan Benito

November 2002



THIS STORY CONTAINS SPOILERS FOR THE HARRY POTTER SERIES: The Philosopher's Stone, Chamber of Secrets, Prisoner of Azkaban and Goblet of Fire.



A Sailor Moon/Harry Potter Crossover.


Disclaimer: All standard disclaimers apply.


The dungeon doors opened soundlessly as seemingly no one entered the room. Harry Potter thanked Merlin for the fact that Snape kept the hinges on his doors well oiled. He honestly suspected that Snape would purposely leave them to rust, making them squeak, and have the excuse to punish a student. Carefully concealed under his Invisibility Cloak, he poked his head out of the dungeon's doors and looked around to see if Mrs. Norris was patrolling. That blasted cat had more than once almost ruined most of his nightly escapades. Seeing no one in sight, he shut the doors and cast a quick locking spell to hold it in place if Snape were to come by. Not like it would hold the professor off for long, but Snape would probably create enough racket to alert Harry that he was there.

Sighing with relief, Harry took off the cloak. If he was looking into a mirror at the moment, it would certainly create some sort of shudder in him. Seeing floating heads, especially if it was his, was not his idea of fun.

The-Boy-Who-Lived took another silent step, this time toward the area where the potion's master kept his supply of ingredients, books, and other whatnots. Walking over to the room where Snape kept his stock of supplies, he took out the list of items Hermione wanted him to get for a Selfula Hybridion Potion* she wanted to make. The potion was much like the Polyjuice potion they had succeeded in making in their third year, only it experimented further with having the ability to transform into different animals instead of humans. It was much like transforming into an Animagus, but the potion only lasted for an hour or so before wearing off.

Too busy just to write him a list of the ingredients, she had given him the potion's instructions. Hermione immediately told him *not* to lose it because it was the only copy she had of the complex potion. Only giving half an ear's attention of what she was saying, Harry had nodded and took the sheet of parchment, stuffing it in his robe. The script was now slightly crumpled when Harry pulled out the list.

He entered the storeroom, searching for a bottle Timena, a rare mineral that was only found in the Far East. When the raw rock had been ground up, the sand could be used in Time Turners. The mineral itself was hard to come by and only the people who paid top price for the item would manage to get it. It was a dangerous substance indeed if used in the wrong way for it had the properties of Time Travel if used correctly. He spotted some Shrivelfig that he was supposed to get right when he heard the slight rattling of the dungeon doors. His eyes widened in surprise and shock. Snape was supposed to be distracted by Peeves! He had asked the Poltergeist to distract the sadistic professor, and in return he wouldn't tell the professors *exactly* what Peeves has put in their pumpkin juice. That bloody ghost; he probably hadn't even tried to provide Snape with an excuse to chase him around muttering curses.

Spotting a bottle of the fine grains of Timena, he grabbed it and quickly ran for his discarded Invisibility Cloak, throwing it over his head just in time before..

..Draco Malfoy walked in?

Harry scowled at the sight of his school enemy. Wondering what Malfoy was doing in Snape's Dungeons at this hour, he was answered his question as the heir of the Malfoy fortune closed the doors quickly and stalked toward Snape's desk.

Harry rolled his eyes. Of course, the Potion Professor's class pet must be getting something for Snape. Casting a silent grumble at Draco, he slowly approached the Malfoy heir as Draco continued to rummage around in Snape's drawers. Harry raised an eyebrow. What was Malfoy looking for?

Draco continued searching through his head of house's desk. Where *was* it? Muttering under his breath, he cursed Snape for confiscating his Time Turner. How was he supposed to finish all his junk load of homework? He could probably sneak a few hours with the hourglass for writing that essay for Transfiguration if he had it. His father had gotten him the hourglass that allowed him to travel to the past for that very reason.

Closing another drawer that held nothing of importance to him, he tugged on the handle of the bottom drawer. Nothing happened. Malfoy smirked. It was locked. This was probably where Snape kept the items he confiscated from his classes. Taking out his wand, he said the counter-curse.

"Alohomora," he muttered and tapped the desk drawer twice. Satisfied, he tugged on it to open it. And apparently, he seemed quite pleased as he sorted through the numerous items. He grabbed a few items that were obviously not his; a box of chocolate frogs, some unused Sugar Quills, and such. He spotted a small velvet pouch. Grabbing it, he closed the drawer and settled down in Snape's chair. He pulled out the small hourglass, the long gold chain that it hung on hanging limply in the air.

Draco stood up to leave. Unfortunately, Harry was standing a little too close to him as he had tugged on the end of Harry's Invisibility Cloak as he had moved forward. The fabric was tugged off Harry's head and his archrival stood in his midst, surprise evident on his face.

Malfoy stumbled back in shock. What the bloody hell?!!! POTTER?????!!!! Reaching into his robes to grab for his wand, he dropped his Time Turner in his haste. The hourglass fell to the stone floor, and with a surprisingly loud bang, the small item shattered.

Harry too stumbled back in surprise. His body still slightly tangled up in his cloak, he fell to the floor, hitting him bottom rather roughly. The bottle of Timena flew out of his hand, its direction flying at an alarming rate toward Malfoy. Draco caught the bottle. Staring at the contents for a moment, he raised an eyebrow at Potter and let the glass bottle drop to the floor. It hit the ground with a resounding crack, the sand in its contents flying out in all directions.

Harry knew from the moment the Timena sand mingled with the sand of the Time Turner, something was wrong. Smoke suddenly appeared in the vicinity from where the Time Turner crashed and an eerie something filled the now silent room.

Why the room was silent when Harry and Draco should have been biting each other's heads off?

The simple answer being that they were no longer there.


~ 1000 Years into the Past ~

Both Harry and Draco shouted (or rather screamed) more curses than I probably will ever put on paper. The two fifth year boys groaned in pain as they hit the dirt ground, sudden pain flaring in the legs and back. It wouldn't probably been so bad if they hadn't landed on someone. Rather because the someone was wearing dress. And had a gold katana strapped onto her back didn't help much as Harry was under Draco. With the weight of Malfoy pressing into him, he found himself being pushed closer to the stranger they had fallen on. The girl with that katana had the blade have its ends continually prodding him in the stomach.

It also wouldn't have been too bad either if the someone wearing a dress and had a sword strapped onto her wasn't a princess. As amazing as it sounds, the one in a million chance of Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy falling onto the Crown Princess Haruka of Uranus didn't seem very likely.

Why it happened isn't the point.

The point is.. that it happened.

And both Harry and Draco would pay dearly as Haruka shoved them off her with surprising strength and unsheathed her sword.


*Selfula Hybridion Potion: Well, obviously I made this up. It is basically a potion that allows the drinking to change into another animal. Much like the Polyjuice Potion, only it changed them into some sort of creature instead of a human.


MWAHAHAHAHA! Hehe, I couldn't help but write this!!! Well, did you like it? I hope you did. I sure enjoyed writing it. I'll continue if I get some support to continue this story! I don't know if I should. I have all those other stories I have to take care of. But still! I have never started a story that I couldn't finish. PLEASE REVIEW AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK!

Much mahal 3!

Ciao! ~KB Jackie-chan