Shadow

"Hey you, see me, pictures crazy
All the world I've seen before me passing by "

"Why Yugi?? Why did you do it?!"

"I've never been wanted here... it was you who was living my life all this time...I'm just... a shadow"

"Don't be silly!! Please...hold on.."

I heard the alarm as I wake up to get ready for school. I go and change into my uniform. I grab my backpack and I look at some pictures I had on the floor. There's Yami and me. I look closely and I notice something strange. Yami's in front of me with bright color, when I'm behind him with fade color, like a ...shadow. I shake my head in disbelief. " This pictures are crazy". I go downstairs to find grampa awake. But as always, he doesn't even know I'm there. He's talking to Yami.

I go and say "hi" and the only thing I hear is "just a second Yugi" and he goes on talking to Yami about some shit I don't really care. I go and eat breakfast quietly. Grampa and Yami start laughing. What's so funny? I say in my head. I look at them jealously, laughing and being all happy. It has always been this way since he met Yami. I could swear that grampa loves Yami more than me.

This never happened before. In the past grampa always had time for me. He never ignored me. Guess the world they wanted me to believe was all fake. What kind of people changes their own grandson for an stranger? Yeah, that's what it was... A stranger. I don't even know him anymore.

I finish my breakfast and stand up heading for the door. I say bye knowing I will get no answer. And I was right. Even when I closed the door I still could hear their laughs.

"I've got nothing, to gain, to lose
All the world I've seen before me passing by"

As I walk to the school I begin to think. I begin to remember what it was like when Yami wasn't around. My friends were with me all the time supporting me. We hanged out together and do all kinds of stuff. But now.. all they talk about is Yami. Yami Yami Yami!! The whole fucking world runs around Yami!!

I've always thought he was the shadow, the one that was behind me. But looking at these pictures, now I see the truth. They're not messed up, it's true. I've become his shadow. He's living my life, he now owns my friends, my family, my life...

What about me? I've been forgotten.. I'm nothing but.. his shadow. I have no place in this world, I've been ignored. I have no life, the one I had is now "his". I can't help but get mad just to hear his name.

I reached the school and see my ex-friends looking behind me. I know.. they're looking for "him". They don't even talk to me anymore. They forgot about me.

I see Yami coming and how his friends welcome him. They start talking and laughing all happily. I'm just watching still, filled with madness and jealousy. I hear the bell ring. They all go to class the same as me. But as always, I've been ignored. Nobody notice when I enter. I can go late to class and the teacher won't even notice. But when Yami enters the class everybody welcome him. Even the damn teacher!!

The class begin. The same as everyday. The teacher gives a boring speech. I stare at my notebook. I've been writing things without knowing it.

"You don't care about how I feel
I don't feel it any more "
"You don't care about how I feel
I don't feel it any more "
"You don't care about how I feel
I don't feel it any more "
"You don't care about how I feel
I don't feel it any more "

My heart has toughen up. I don't care anymore for them. They've forgotten about me. Then why should I care for them? They, who said they were my friends, my family. They prefered the one that I thought was my shadow. Him.

The bell rang again. It's time for lunch. I see him and my friends seated eating all happily. I go outside and sit behind a tree, all alone. It has been days like this, I'm not hungry anymore, I have lost weight. My face is all pale, full with bags under my eyes. I take the pictures out to see them one more time. I can't believe I just noticed, I've become a shadow..

Rage takes over me again. I start breaking the pictures while a tear ran through my face. I hear a voice calling me. "Yugi?"

I look up to meet his face. "What do you want?" I ask, with a cold voice I've never thought I had. He sits next to me, looking worried.

"Please Yugi, what's wrong?"

"What's wrong about what?" I said with the same coldness as before.

"Look at you. You're so pale, even thiner than before. You haven't eaten well have you?"

"What do you care?!" I said standing up, looking at him with a death-glare.

"I care about you. You're my hikari. Please, tell me what's wrong? Maybe I can help you..."

I start laughing out loud, making fun of him. He stares at me with a confused look. "You wanna know what's wrong? YOU'RE WHAT'S WRONG!! " I ran away as tears came running through my face. He tries to follow me, but it was too late. He stands up and looks at the pictures I broke. He looked closely to them. His eyes open wide. "This pictures must be wrong!"

"Hey you, are me, not so pretty
All the world I've seen before me passing by "

Time passed and the bell rang. It is time to go to that place called "home". I was relieved I didn't see Yami the rest of the day. I'm pretty sure he'll ask me questions, faking being worried about me. "Why the hell he doesn't mind his own fucking business!!"

I go to my locker and grab my stuff. I head for my "home" against my will. I walk quietly through the street. Not a soul in sight. Or at least I thought.

"Hey spiked-head" I hear someone say behind me. I ignore him and continue walking. I feel the boy turned me around to face him. "Don't ignore me you stupid bitch!!" I see other boys along with him. I then realize what's going on. I try to run, but they're fast enough.

I couldn't help it. I couldn't defend myself. I'm so weak. "Please, stop!!" I scream at the top of my lungs, but nobody listens. Nobody can hear... a shadow...

"Silent my voice, I've got no choice
All the world I've seen before me passing by "

I enter home quietly. Nobody's home, as always. I go upstairs and close the door. I see myself in the mirror. My face is all covered with blood. My body hurts like hell. I sit in a corner and start crying. All alone. I hide my face between my knees. I feel so lonely. I wish to die.

"You don't care about how I feel
I don't feel it any more "
"You don't care about how I feel
I don't feel it any more "
"You don't care about how I feel
I don't feel it any more "
"You don't care about how I feel
I don't feel it any more"

I hear someone knocking at the door. "Yugi, open up please!!" It's him... again.

"Go away!!" I try to scream but it hurts so much. Everything hurts. I can't take the pain anymore. I want to end it right now.

He continues to knock harder and harder at the door. He notices a notebook on the floor. He picks it up and notices what's written in it. All my thoughts, my feelings...

"I don't see, anymore"
"I don't hear, anymore"
"I don't speak, anymore"
"I don't feel"

The pictures fall to the floor. He looks closely to them again. He now realizes it is true. The pictures aren't wrong. I've become a shadow.. his shadow...

"Hey you, see me, pictures crazy
All the world I've seen before me passing by "

"Please Yugi, open this door!!" He said trying to break the door. I sit there still, I reach a knife I had under my bed. I've always wanted to end my life, but I was too weak. I've been always weak. But now I'll show them who's the weak one. I stare at the knife carefully. Would somebody miss me when I'm gone? Mmmm... I don't think so. They have Yami. They always had. Then why continue on living? I got nothing... I don't even exist anymore...

"I've got nothing, to gain, to lose
All the world I've seen before me passing by "

I start cutting my wrists slowly. The pain is tremendous, but I'll all end soon. I see how my blood expands in the floor. Tears ran through my face. Even though I've never been wanted here, I feel like I'm going to miss them. I see my whole life passing through my eyes. I'm dying. And it feels soo good...

I hear Yami finally breaking the door. He looks horrified when he looks at me. My body is covered with blood. Weakly I look at him expressionless. He comes running to me.

"Why Yugi?? Why did you do it?!"

"I've never been wanted here... it was you who was living my life all this time...I'm just... a shadow "

"Don't be silly!! Please...hold on.."

"You don't care about how I feel
I don't feel it any more "
"You don't care about how I feel
I don't feel it any more "
"You don't care about how I feel
I don't feel it any more "
"You don't care about how I feel
I don't feel it any more "

I see tears running through his face. I don't believe it. He's really worried about me. But is too late now, I've lost a lot of blood. It's too late...

I feel his arms around me. I start crying in his shoulders. "I'm sorry Yugi, please forgive me.." He hugs me harder, seeking for my forgiveness. "I'm sorry Yami, I'm sorry I was so weak all the time. You don't need my forgiveness, for me, I've always been dead"

"Please...don't say that. I've always cared about you. You became my best friend. I'm sorry I forgot about you Yugi... please forgive me.."

My vision becames unclear. I no longer hear. I no longer suffer. I no longer live...

"Yugi!! please...don't leave me...!!"

"I don't sleep, anymore"
"I don't eat, anymore"
"I don't live, anymore"
"I don't feel"

System of a down

ATWA