Disclaimer: ELLSING-HAY oesn't-day elongy-bay o-tay e-may. Isclaimer-day ill-way emain-ray in-ay effect-ay or-fay he-tay uaration-day of-ay eries-say. (If you have learnt Pig Latin you should understand that. If not, shame, shame, shame: go back to primary school and learn it…^-^)

Walter's Gotten His Groove Back!!

4:30 am. Time to get up.

Walter con Dolneaz yawned and rubbed his eyes. Removing himself (rather unwillingly) from his bed, he donned his flannel robe over cotton pyjamas. Odd, Walter mused as he made his way to his ensuite bathroom in the dark, I feel…different somehow.

Several times he stumbled on his pyjama bottoms; either he shrank in the course of the night or the damn pants were drawn down around his knees!! He was continuously stepping on the loose cotton material, finally falling arse down.

After several (painful) falls and equal number of curses, Walter managed to make it to the bathroom. Not bothering to turn on the lights for now the glow of false dawn filtered through the window, he staggered the sink to wash his face and felt around his chin for any stubble. Pleased and a little surprised to find none (that meant no sharp razor blades nor any stinging cuts!) Walter looked at himself in the medicine cabinet mirror for any indications of changes in himself and almost yelled from shock.

A youthful 20-year-old Walter con Dolneaz stared back from the mirror surface.

Walter must've been gawking at himself for sometime, for now the first rays of true dawn now fell on the tiled floor of the ensuite. He glanced first at his hands, smooth and still strong looking; they weren't ruined by age and wrinkles. Then he looked down at his body. So that's why he kept tripping; the pyjama bottoms were too long for him by five centimetres! The same circumstances were found on the pyjama sleeves. He looked like a teenaged boy wearing his father's bedclothes.

Walter snapped his attention back to the face staring from the mirror.

What the fook happened t' me?!

He balked at the next question he asked himself.

An' what am I goin' t' do now?!

*          ~          *          ~          *          ~          *

"Integra? Integra get up now, please! This is urgent!"

What was all the commotion? Was it an emergency? Didn't sound as urgent…She groaned in protest and moved her head closer to the pillow. 'Twas far too early…

The voice broke again through her sleep-hazed mind; it sounded half way between demanding and pleading. And it sounded very familiar. Walter…? Strong hands firmly shook her awake. After blearily opening tired blue eyes, a familiar yet not so familiar face looming over her began to come into focus.

"AAAAAAIIIIIIEEEEEKKK!!!" For the first time in her 23-year-old life, Integra Fairbrook Wingates Hellsing screamed (a feat Alucard has longed to do).

She flung herself to the other side of her king size bed, away from the strangely familiar young man who had woken her. She would have reached for her pistol concealed in the headboard of her bed, when the young man spoke again.

"Integra! Calm yourself child! It's me: Walter!"


The young man nodded. Integra, rather than grab the gun, picked up her glasses on the bedside table and pushed them past the bridge of her nose, blinking her eyes rapidly in disbelief. Yes it was Walter…48 years younger that is. He still had the same eyes, though instead of containing the mildness she was accustomed to, young Walter's green eyes were darker and held a certain roguish look about them. And his hair was still black; it was no longer pulled back from his face but rather hung down waywardly over rather handsome features.

Dressed in night-time attire that would be more suited for an older man (dark blue pyjamas covered by a flannel robe), Integra absently noticed that the pyjamas were at least two sizes bigger for (the now young) Walter.


"What's happened to me you ask? Wish I could tell you child but I haven't a clue!" Young Walter scratched his head and muttered half jestingly, "Must have been something I ate the night before…"

Integra just continued blinking at him in bewilderment, while hastily robing herself (she was wearing her favourite lingerie: a satin red number, which she literally wrestled from Alucard's grasp). She felt…indecent, wearing the flimsy material in front of Walter, whether he was an old and paternal figure in her life, and ESPECIALLY indecent in front of a young, handsome Walter. The usually calm and controlled air Integra habitually emanates was nowhere to be seen as she took in his striking person.

Absently, young Walter noted that lack of confidence and ambiguity was not very becoming of his Mistress.

"I thought it best to tell you first of my, ah, change of status," young Walter's tone didn't have the baritone quality to 68-year-old Walter, yet his voice was pleasantly deep and still slightly accented, "so you wouldn't have conniptions over the strange, yet handsome young man who was serving you in place of old man Walter." He tried to lighten the situation and mood.

"R-right. Of course. Thank you for your forethought."

The way she was looking at him made Walter ill at ease. Apart from the astonishment and uncertainty on her face, Integra had the look found on flustered girls on their first dates. Was she…giving him an appraisal?

"Integra, where are your manners child? Change or no change, haven't I taught you that staring is quite rude?"

The Lady of the House blinked several more times before his statement registered and looked away. When she looked back, Integra's usual cool demeanour was restored.

"Well forgive me, Walter, but my mentor and aged steward has now been reverted to his youth and he woke me up this morning. How else shall I react?"

"Hmph. Fair enough reason pet. But I'm still me."

And with that young Walter gave a smile that was a ghost of the one she was used to, but it seemed…cheekier. As the rejuvenated butler walked away towards her bedroom door, he paused to give a backwards glance at her that Integra didn't trust. It reminded her too much of a certain infuriating vampyre, yet it wasn't as manic but more playful.

"Ye know, most women usually have a more pleasant reaction when they wake up beside me." He quipped, grinning a friendly, yet mischievous smile. Integra blushed bright red, her blue eyes widening at the insinuation of the jest and the person who made it.

A laughing young Walter con Dolneaz walked out of his mistress' bedroom.

*          ~          *          ~          *          ~          *

"Heh heh heh, so Walter: you've discovered the secret of Eternal Youth, hmmn? Care to share?"

"You've Immortal idiot. You wouldn't need it, so no."

Integra sighed and began to furiously massage her temples. She stared at the two men facing her who were standing on the other side of her desk. Alucard and young Walter looked as though they were about to have a 'frank exchange of ideas', which Walter had told her was common sight to behold in the days of her father's leadership. Just as she was about to tell the two to 'SHUT UP!!', Integra stopped herself: she couldn't deal with this; not right now. Not when one has just discovered that one's aged butler had somehow reverted back to his youth. And especially not when one finds out that his striking good looks appealed to one.

Alucard seemed unperturbed with the recent turn of events and didn't bat an eyelash at seeing his old comrade-in-arms revitalized to his youth. Of course, Alucard was over 550 years old, so he must have been eyewitness to stranger and unusual things.

She stood up from her seat, a signal to the two to quit their bickering. Integra addressed Walter.

"The question is 'What do you want to do now?'"

Integra and Alucard both looked at Walter; her glance held a certain look that Walter could not identify, while the vampyre's glance was brimming with evil, evil amusement.

"Well," young Walter began slowly as he scratched the back of his neck, "I presume the best option for me is to go back into active service…"


Battle for the Title of 'Bishi-Gami' and the Deal!!

"You damned fool! May I remind you that you are technically an old man, while I will forever retain my stunning bishi looks? So that makes me HELLSING's 'God of Bishi'!!"

"Alucard, you're nothing more than HELLSING's resident bitch and Integra's whipping boy. I am HELLSING's 'Bishi-Gami', whether old or young. Accept it!"

Both 'Bishi Gods' glared at the other and whipped out their weapons; Alucard had his Cassul aimed squarely at young Walter's forehead while the latter had his garrottes around the vampyre's entire body, including his gun too.

"Boys," said the author amiably, rushing up to separate them before they could mar those striking bishi features, "You're both HELLSING's 'Gods of Bishi' or 'Bishi-Gami' or whatever you title you wish. Now put away those lovely weapons of carnage and follow me, my scrumptious Undead slaying hotties… "

This time both 'Bishi-Gamis' gave a very creeped-out look to Angie. Who shrugged, grabbed both by the hand and proceeded dragging a kicking and screaming Alucard and young Walter towards her bedroom…

"OI!!" Growled a voice. The trio turned around: a fuming Integra stood before them. Alucard and young Walter looked relieved at the sudden turn of events, while the author sighed at her miserable luck. "WHAT THE HELL(SING) DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?! THEY BOTH BELONG TO THE LADY OF THE HOUSE: ME!!"

"Oh don't be a greedy-guts 'Gra!" Protested Angie mightily. "Alright here: have Alucard. He can give you another stimulating bath time. You really seem to need it."

A pause.

"Hmmn, that's true. Alright then: I keep Alucard." Young Walter began to show signs of panic; Alucard was grinning triumphantly. "But he can't make a decent cup of tea like Walter can!"

"Okay, okay, FINE! Monday to Wednesday: you have Walter and I have Alucard. Thursday to Saturday we swap. Sundays we halve the day: Saturday midnight to Sunday noon Alucard's with me, and you can have Walter. Sunday noon to midnight Monday we swap again. You follow me?" Nods all around. "Good. Now whaddya say, 'Gra? We got a deal? Yay or Nay?"

"Deal." Integra responded immediately and both ladies shook the other's hand. Now being a Saturday, Integra led (an eager) Alucard to her stately bathroom. Which left young Walter with the author, who gave him a shy smile. Walter shrugged (he seemed resigned to his fate), smiled wickedly back at her as he picked Angie up and sprinted to her bedroom…

Author's Drivel:

Okay, just a little piece that was inspired by several hours gazing at fanarts of young Walter con Dolneaz. After first seeing him as a young man I immediately thought 'BISHI-GAMI!!!' and not 'SHINI-GAMI'. And after searching the Net for anything else about him, I discovered that several doujinshis were created concerning young Walter (note to self: continue learning Japanese and save up money to buy said doujinshis!! ^-^). So in the mean time, o' course I had to write about young bishi, BISHI, BISHI Walter!!

Calvin and Hobbes reference there: can you spot it? VIVA CALVIN AND HOBBES!! *scrapes and bows to Bill Watterson*

Dedicated to FF.net members who that thing that they do late at night that I do, apart from writing, reading and reviewing!! Okay that sounded very suspect…but what I meant was staying up late to read fics!! That's all I swear!! ^o^

Damned Caeli: The 'change the character's status' theme in your fic 'CAT-astrophe' inspired this! Thanks for the bright idea!! *death hugz Caeli* OOPS!! Gomen!! ^-^;

This is for all Walter fans (again!) whether young or old (fans and Walter alike that is). You guys want me to continue? *shrugs and grins* TOO LATE!! I will anyway!! *laughs insanely until head falls off*

A Merry Christmas to you!!