Trigger warning: This chapter discusses the idea of torture, and all that implies. It is not graphic, but it is overt and blunt.

This version is pre-beta. Expect errors.

"Haruno Sakura, applicant one four four seven vee eye one?"

The voice was dull, disinterested, completely monotone, the sort of voice one would expect sitting behind a desk, describing how your insurance does not cover the life-saving medication you need, yes, a real pity, so sorry, but there it is. The fact that the voice belonged to someone who might well have the same power over life and death for her did little to help.

Sakura kept her eyes shut. The entryway to the T&I department was pitch dark as it was, a large maze built into a metal building designed to disorient anyone who tried to escape. At the end of the maze was an elevator leading deep into the earth, and lined entirely with metal, just like the entirety of the base itself. According to her sources, anyhow. She could second guess all she had been told, but after a certain point you either walked away in fear or jumped in and hoped for the best. Only one such reaction would do here.

"I have been ordered to be present at this room at this time. My applicant number is unknown to me."

"I just told you it," said the voice, now slightly incredulous.

"You told me a number that you want me to believe is my applicant number, sir," she said politely. "If there even is an application number, I do not presume that number is accurate."

Until you sign the paperwork, your every moment in the building will be a test, not of your intellect or skill, but of your cunning.

Sakura had not been idle in the past week. She read up on rules and procedures and theory. She asked family and family of friends for info. And she had very carefully grilled Kakashi for several hours on what he knew about T&I. The end result, after she collated her gathered information, was a series of rules she suspected would be vital to her application.

Volunteer nothing, assume nothing, no matter how obvious. T&I was a place where information became a form of currency, and like anyone who handled money for a living, you never paid anyone if you could help it.

"Stand by," said the voice in the darkness.

She did not respond, but she did react. She spread her fingers out slightly behind her back as she stood at attention, sending out several thin strands of chakra from them. They looped around her, forming a fine mesh screen, giving her a tactile sense of her surroundings that did not rely on mere light. With those strands, she could navigate and fight in total darkness. Even dodge high speed missiles fired at random from that damned machine Onna had, she thought, and she resisted the urge to smirk to herself. The Cat Whiskers jutsu was a pain to train, literally most of the time, but it was immensely useful when you couldn't see.

She spread her strands of chakra slightly, trading off fine detail for range, and was not surprised to find that a secret panel had been opened in a wall, and a shinobi was slowly sneaking towards her.

Wherever possible, identify their goals and turn them against them.

She followed the shinobi with her chakra, the tactile image becoming more and more defined the closer they got. The male was approaching, arm raised and kunai in hand, his other hand holding some sort of cloth pad that Sakura suspected was drugged somehow. It took very little in the way of consideration to recognize their intention.

The moment he got within range, Sakura spun, leg extended, and delivered a kick to the crotch that sent the shinobi into the wall he had emerged from with a loud thud. He tumbled to the ground and started to stand.

"Try that again, and I promise I'll make you cry."

The man lifted his knife and took a step towards her.

"I imagine you don't believe me, and maybe you'd be right."

Another step.

"But you can bet I will try, as hard as I can."

The next step was much shorter.

"And if you cost me this job, I'll be sure to schedule a follow up with you to improve my technique before I apply again."

This time, the man stopped walking completely.

"By schedule, I mean I will have some quiet discussions with a few people I know, do a little wandering during the day while you are about your duties, and one night, when you finally stop feeling paranoid about this little discussion…"

She trailed off, letting the silence stretch off into the darkness. The man shuffled slightly, maybe from unease, maybe waiting for further orders, but eventually he grunted quietly, "Yeah, and?"

Sakura smiled in the dark. Even if he couldn't see her face, he was a T&I shinobi, he could probably hear it in her voice. "Well," she said sweetly, "would I really be applying here if I was going to tell you my plans? Keep it up and find out, sweetie, or else back the fuck off."

"Ichi, stand down," said the dull voice. A door opened in front of Sakura, shedding light into the dark room, and revealing the imposing appearance of Morino Ibiki, head of the Torture and Interrogation Unit. Framed by the light, his face and eyes were hidden from Sakura's views. "Applicant Haruno, we have been watching. Your interest in T&I has hardly been subtle."

Sakura stood at attention. "Sir, background checks are almost certainly part of the application process. Hiding my interest would be at best pointless and at worst grandstanding."

She couldn't be sure, but she thought she heard a small smile in Ibiki's voice. "And you are aware that there is no second chances here at T&I? One test, pass or fail. Pass and you're in. Fail, and you're out."

Sakura nodded, and Ibiki stepped back. "Very well," he said, waving a hand forward. "Come with me, please."

Ibiki lead her to a small guard station down a short and well lit hall. A simple desk, chair, and door, the station could be a civilian thing were it not for the hard eyed shinobi at the desk and the man leading her in. Ibiki made a couple hand signs, and the guard nodded before Ibiki opened the metal door to reveal a metal and concrete stairwell. "Passwords are nonverbal," he said as they marched down the stairs. "Can't simply overhear. We aren't currently holding any particularly dangerous or sensitive guests, but when we do, we tend to use verbal passwords as a cover."

He walked down a short corridor at the bottom of the stairs that was lined with windows, revealing small padded rooms. Each window also had a heavy door with a lock, as well as several bolts made of different materials. "This is Holding Station Alpha, Applicant Haruno. HSA is used to hold potential risks but not presumably deadly subjects. Visiting shinobi who cause trouble at a local bar, supposed civilians acting strangely, and other low key threats are brought here for sorting. There is usually someone on duty here when we have visitors, but otherwise we don't bother keeping it staffed." They reached the end of the hall, and Ibiki again made hand signs to a guard on duty before turning left.

They passed several doors as they traveled down into the earth, each one unmarked and identical to the last. Eventually, Ibiki opened a door almost at random and revealed a nondescript hallway. He walked down the hallway and opened one of the many doors to reveal a small room with a single table and two chairs. "Have a seat, Applicant Haruno. I have a few things to attend to. Do as you see fit while you wait, but do not leave this room until I return." He gave her a smile that was all teeth. "To date, twelve candidates have seen things beyond their clearance during their application process. All but one were immediately failed." He nodded sternly at her and left without another word, shutting the door with a click.

Sakura did not relax. There was a large section of the wall to one side of the table that was made of reflective glass, which meant it was almost certainly an observation window. As this was the T&I base of operations, she doubted that window was the only means of observation in this room. So she sat quietly and waited.

After the better part of an hour, the door slipped open. Sakura stared as it silently opened just enough to let someone into the room before swinging shut again. Without making a sound, Sakura sent out ethereal whiskers of chakra, carefully coating the room with them. Walls, floor, ceiling, each of them were soon covered with a crosshatch of pressure sensitive lines. These found nothing, even when she suddenly retracted them all at once, forming a sort of net to catch possible intruders. Still, nothing was awry, so she remained sitting.

The door opened and closed four more times before she felt someone enter under a well performed stealth jutsu. As she remained sitting, showing no outward sign of notice, the invisible figure stepped around her. It circled her several times, never once coming within arm's reach, before they began to head for the door again.

"I was under the impression the test would be harder than sitting unmoving in a room," she said blandly. The intruder halted for a moment, then without a sound, the door opened, and the figure left… leaving the door wide open.

She waited quietly for several minutes before a speaker in the ceiling crackled, and Ibiki said, "Sakura, three doors to the left. Proceed. Knock three times before entering."

Sakura didn't move.

After a few moments, Ibiki walked through the doorway with a cheerful grin. "Nicely done, Sakura. A lot of applicants fail at that part, they get too curious for their own good. Come with me for the next part of the test."

Sakura gave Ibiki a slow look, from head to toe, and did not move. "You're not Morino-san."

The smile vanished. "I realize you're a smart one, kid, but I don't appreciate the horseshit. Come along."

Sakura crossed her arms and leaned back, ticking fingers as she spoke. "First, Morino Ibiki has been careful to always call me Applicant Haruno, presumably for professionalism, but possibly also for the sake of this test. Second, there is no way I walked into this building without being paranoid enough to notice that Ibiki probably does not smile much while on duty, never mind a shit eating grin like that. Your presentation is far too emotional. Third, your gait is off. Ibiki seems to walk with a firm but slightly stiff gate, while you walk quietly as if stealth is a habit. Finally, and I can't believe I need to tell you this," she smirked at the imposter, "but you got his feet wrong. Ibiki was wearing open toe black sandals with grey leg wraps, not grey sandals with black leg wraps. I'm assuming that was part of the testing procedure, and not incompetence, right…" She thought for a moment, tilting her head to one side, and decided to go for broke.

"... Kakashi?"

The imposter slumped and looked at the glass. "I told you the footwear thing was unessisery," he said, even as he dispelled the henge to reveal her sensei.

"It's still procedure," said Ibiki over the intercom. There was a click as the intercom turned off, and after a moment, Ibiki walked in. "Very well, Applicant Haruno. You are correct, so far this has been a test of intelligence gathering. Had you left the room, you would have been failed. Now, however, you must face the second half of the test. I assume Kakashi informed you to the nature of the test?"

Sakura nodded and tried not to show any signs of discomfort. The first part of the test was for her intellect. The second was for the strength of her soul in the face of doing what she must to be a member of T&I.

Torture and Interrogation.

Ibiki nodded in return, possibly to acknowledge her reaction or lack thereof. "The second half of the test is much harder. We will be bringing you to an interrogation chamber. There, you will be required to get a passcode from a prisoner I have been… working on. The only rule is, the subject cannot die, or be rendered unable to communicate their knowledge. Understood?"

Sakura stood at attention. "Understood, sir."

Sakura entered the interrogation room and sat in the lightweight wooden chair. Across from her, bound to a heavy metal chair, was a female shinobi.

Her time in T&I had not been kind to her. Her face was heavily bruised, making her almost unrecognizable. Much of her hair was missing, either shaved as a demoralizing tactic or, more likely, removed root and all as part of her stay. Her hands were bound in front of her, wrists crossed, and Sakura could plainly see the foreign objects currently under the prisoner's nails.

More telling, and disturbing, was how the prisoner held herself awkwardly, as if nursing bodily pains including some very deep wounds. Sakura felt sickened at the idea that the interrogators had penetrated the captive, body and soul, in their quest to break this woman. But she was the trainee, not the main interrogator, and it was not her place to judge their methods... yet.

Sakura could see no way to hurt the captive worse than the other interrogations had, not physically, but her research had indicated that physical torture was not the greatest weapon to use against a captive. Pain could only be dished out in small amounts, or else the subject would go mad or grow desensitized to it. The goal of such actions, of the pain and the solitary confinement and the mind games, was to make the captive realize one all important fact, that they were powerless, and the only way to end their suffering would be to give in.

After a moment's thought, Sakura leaned forward and whispered quietly into the captive's least damaged ear. "Do not react to anything I say. My name is Sakura, and I'm new here. I see what they've done to you, and it's… wrong." She artfully choked on that last word, letting a little disgust and fear enter her voice. "I can't do anything right now. You're part of my training, and I have to get a passcode from you. I can't pass if I don't get it."

The captive shifted slightly and growled. "So… what?" She coughed and licked dry lips. "What do I care… for your shitty little job?"

Sakura slapped the woman, a hard slap on a cut on her cheek, then leaned in again. "I can't help you if I can't work here. Give me the passcode, and I can start working my way into this place. Eventually, they'll have to give me some keys."

"Bullshit," said the captive, spitting blood at Sakura. "Why should I trust you to help me? You'll have your cushy little job, and I'll be dead."

"They still need to verify the info I get, which means they can't just kill you. Konohagakure's T&I unit is infamous for a reason. They always get their info eventually, because they will take weeks, months, even years if needed to get it. It's not a question of what can you lose by trusting me, because you lose nothing but even more suffering. It's a question of what you might gain. More freedom. Less rape. Time to rest and heal in a cell… and maybe a chance at escape."

The prisoner cracked one bleary, bloodshot eye and glared at Sakura, who sat back quietly and waited. After nearly a minute, the prisoner bowed her head. "The password is JINN-09-L02."

Sakura resisted the urge to scoff. There was no way they'd give her the code so quickly. She leaned forward again, and let a little steel creep into her voice. "You realize that a false code will do neither of us any good. They will verify this. I can't save you if you don't cooperate fully."

The captive sat up and stared at Sakura, then started to laugh. She turned to the one way mirror and, between chuckles, said, "Hey, that's a new one, Ibiki. I think she's a keeper."

The intercom crackled, and Ibiki's voice was cold and flat when he replied. "You're not supposed to break character."

Sakura's eyes widened as the subject stood up, her bindings dropping to the floor with a clatter. The prisoner lunged, then yelped when Sakura slashed her across the palm of her outstretched hand with a kunai she had been hiding in her hands. "Fuck, that's a bit much isn't… it…"

Ibiki entered at about the same time that subject dropped senseless to the floor, and he immediately stomped over to have a look. "Mitarashi Anko is a highly placed member of T&I who was selected to play the role of the prisoner. She is not a threat. What did you do to her?"

Sakura stood at attention and held her kunai out, grip first, for inspection. "Paralytic, sir. Fast working but short term. No more than ten minutes." Ibiki snorted, and with barely a grunt he tossed Anko's senseless form over his shoulder like a bag of wheat. "Walk with me, Applicant Haruno," he said, marching out the door.

"Tell me," he said as he walked down the hall, "What was the purpose of that test?"

Sakura shrugged. "I am uncertain, to be honest. I suspected it was staged, because nobody would take an untrained applicant and put them to work on something like this. I was actually concerned it was going to turn into a test of my willingness to do as ordered, no matter what."

Ibiki laughed, loud and bright, and Sakura stumbled slightly when he brought one hand down on her shoulder. "Quite the opposite, in fact." His smile faded slightly as he stopped and turned to face her. "Sakura, any number of shinobi have applied to work here. There is a trait that everyone assumes we want in T&I, and yet runs counter to our goals. It is a trait that our final test is designed to weed out, and you don't have it, but everyone thinks those of us in T&I do, and we cultivate that ignorance and reputation as a tool. What is that trait?"

Sakura looked up into his big, scarred face, the vague look of cold judgement he seemed to default to when he wasn't smiling. She thought about his reputation, Morino Ibiki, Head Torturer of Konohagakure. What would a random outsider assume of him? What would they assume of her if she was accepted into T&I?

"Sadism," she said quietly.

"Sadism," replied Ibiki with a nod, his face unmoving. "Here at T&I, we do not employ sadists, for damn good reason. This is not a game. This is not fun. In the darkness of our little nest, we torture, maim, and kill people we have rendered helpless and hopeless for the good of our village. Our goal is not to spread mindless suffering. Our goal is to get important information through whatever means we must. We sacrifice our morals, our honor, and our reputations to get the Hokage vital information, and the only thing we should ever feel when we hurt a captive is hope that they will give up and accept the inevitable."

He knelt with a grunt, setting Anko on the floor gently, and Sakura was surprised to realize that even kneeling so, his eyes were even with hers. "You will lose sleep, Sakura. You will lay your head down at your normal, humdrum home, close your eyes, and see the horrors you have inflicted. You will get up the next day, nod to your friends as they pass you by, and then walk into work and inflict even more horrors. You will act callous and cold, supportive and understanding, whatever you must to break your subject. You will make promises you never intend to keep, swear oaths that would make you sick. You will suffer. Think carefully, Sakura. Are you certain you want to pay this price? That you can pay this price?"

Sakura took a deep, shuddering breath, and for all her effort, a single tear managed to escape her eyes and run down her face, but she felt no doubt. She could do it. So she nodded and sealed her fate.

Ibiki smiled and drew her into a hug. "Welcome to the family," he said.

Sakura found that Ibiki spoke the truth. T&I was very much like a family. Ibiki himself was certainly a fatherly figure. He was involved in actual interrogations from time to time, but for the most part, his job was to watch over the other interrogators. It was Ibiki who ensured that no interrogator went too far, and it was Ibiki who made sure the interrogators didn't break themselves.

He was also the picture of cold authority when he became involved in an interrogation, a father passing judgement on his child and finding them unworthy. His cold, dull expression, often brought in after hours or days of interrogation by others, was often enough to crack whatever facade the subject was trying to use to resist.

If Ibiki was a father figure, Anko was certainly a elder sister. Bratty, crude, cruel, these were all traits she presented to her subjects. Admittedly, a lot of those traits were true to her own nature, as she gleefully admitted more than once, but where they were well intentioned and humorous for her friends and allies, for her subjects, she acted as if their mind and body remained whole only on her whim and patience.

Sakura learned how to physically torture subjects (and they were always subjects, never people and never victims), but those lessons were mostly learned from a book and theoretical in nature. Inflicting pain could be helpful, but generally in itself was not enough to break hardened shinobi. That was not to say she did not witness, and participate in, some physical torture. It was part of the job, and she had to face it sooner rather than later when the need was more dire. But as much as it disgusted her, as unpleasant and heart-wrenching as it was, Sakura learned her duty in such cases and learned it well.

She instead learned how to break people's minds. Pain, yes, but there were other means to do so. Isolation. Fear. Discomfort. Loneliness. Shame. Helplessness. Hopelessness. Even understanding, even friendship, all could be tools that a good interrogator could use to unlock a subject's mind and heart.

She slotted almost naturally into the younger sister slot. Where Ibiki would be cold, distant, and judgmental, and Anko would be cruel and mercurial, Sakura was the "good little girl." She would often be charged with taking care of the needs of her subjects. Provide food and water. Care for wounds from Anko's more physical efforts. She provided comfort, even friendship, and she provided it without regard for the subject's temperament. And after each session, she went to her desk and filled out her report, including any little hints the subject may have dropped to indicate the next step to take in the path to their destruction.

When ANBU delivered the "Kunai Cutter", a shinobi who had been caught killing a civilian family in a gruesome manner and suspected for a string of disappearances, he'd not reacted in the least to Anko's torture or Ibiki's judgement, but one murmur of understanding from Sakura had gotten him talking. He explained his desire to be respected, his need to kill any who disrespected him, his sad story of his family being dishonored in his youth. She accepted it all without judgement, and he just kept talking, about the clever ways he hid the bodies, how carefully and skillfully he disassembled his victims, and how useful he would have been for T&I if they hadn't failed his application.

Sakura gave him a pleasant meal, eased his pains, and agreed with the injustice of his treatment. She took notes on a letter he wanted to send to the Hokage, swearing on his reformation and renewing his pledge of service. She delivered her report to Ibiki afterwards, and managed to almost make it to the bathroom before she got sick on the floor.

Anko visited her in the bathroom after a few minutes to give her some water, pat her on the back, and explained gently that he'd been so talkative in his confession that there had been no need for a formal trial, and on order of the Hokage he was already dead. Ibiki had given her a hug and told her she'd done a good job. And Sakura went home that night and cried into her pillow while Kieri purred in her ear comfortingly.

The next day, she got up, pulled herself together, and went to work, much to the surprise of both of her superiors. Ibiki offered to grant her a day off, as they had little to do but paperwork, but she declined. There was work to be done, and every part she did was that much less the others had to.

They were family.

"... and of course, you could always go find Tora."

Sasuke fought to keep his face blank. Konohamaru had paled immensely when the Hokage mentioned the constantly troublesome cat, and even Ebisu flinched slightly, which was impressive. Sasuke had grown used to seeing the various genin teams each day, and Ebisu had always struck him as a serious and stoic shinobi.

The knowledge that even someone like Ebisu would flinch when faced with another Tora mission was somehow comforting, a sort of unifying rite of passage for all Konohagakure shinobi.

It was also, unarguably, hilarious. Sasuke was almost certain that Iruka was fighting back a laugh, and he was completely certain that Hiruzen was using the tip of his pipe to hide the uptick on the side of his mouth.

"Yes," said the Hokage, handing over a scroll, "I think another day of Tora will do your team good, Ebisu. Good luck."

Team Ebisu stood at attention, except for Konohamaru, who crossed his arms and glared until Ebisu swatted the back of his head, to which Iruka almost broke character with a chuckle.

The moment the genin left, Iruka's indifferent mask broke and he snorted. "That's what, third time this week, Hokage-sama?"

Hiruzen nodded, allowing himself to smile as well as he shuffled through his paperwork. "I can't help but notice that we get even more Tora missions than I recall from your early days, Sasuke. I am quite curious if that has something to do with Miss Haruno and her summons."

Sasuke smirked. "She might have something to do with it. Tora was already halfway to shinobi status when we first started chasing her. I would not be surprised if Kieri gave that cat some tips."

Hiruzen chuckled at that. "Were she not so focused on T&I, I'd send her to you, Iruka. I've never seen a genin do so much to teach others how to be shinobi, even if her intent might be more malicious than normal. Can you add a commendation to her file when you have a moment, Iruka? 'Direct improvement on training quality of D-rank missions,' that should work."

Iruka nodded to himself and made a note on his clipboard. "I think that's it for the genin teams. I got a message from Maito Guy and Sarutobi Asuma that their genin were doing a group training exercise and would not be taking D-ranks today."

Hiruzen grunted and started closing books. "Right, thank you, Iruka. On to the economy reports for me, and the academy for you. Sasuke, would be so kind to make some tea?"

Sasuke snapped to attention and bowed before going to the bookshelf near the door. Sasuke had no objection to the menial labor. He was still learning the structure of the Hokage's day, and while he was regularly invited to look over unclassified documents and discuss them, he was not yet doing anything more important than tea for the Hokage, and he knew it.

He had just started heating the water when the door behind him opened as Iruka left, then slammed fully open as someone strode in. The room lost the warm, almost comforting aura that the Hokage so readily brought to it, and without even turning, Sasuke knew who their visitor was.

"Hokage-sama," said Danzo, his voice grave. "I have received a report from Suna. Uzumaki Naruto was attacked while on a mission."

Sasuke did not turn, did not allow himself to react in any manner. Never mind that Danzo considered any emotion to be a weakness in a shinobi, never mind he could do nothing to help Naruto from here. He refused to react because he would be damned if he gave Danzo the satisfaction of giving the last loyal Uchiha a load of shit over his bonds.

By the sound of it, Hiruzen had the same inclination. The Hokage did little but sigh and set his pipe down on his desk with a click. "Report."

"The Kazekage sent Uzumaki out with his temporary teammates on a trade mission to Ishigakure. There he was attacked by cultists. Uzumaki is currently being held by Ishigakure."

Hiruzen nodded. "Thank you for letting me know, Danzo."

Danzo stood still for a moment, but when Hiruzen turned back to his paperwork, his voice became cold. "An upstart village holds our greatest weapon hostage, and you dither over paperwork?"

Hiruzen glared at Danzo, but it was Sasuke who spoke, his voice dripping with sarcasm as he walked the tea set to the Hokage's desk. "I suppose what we should be doing is calling up the reserves and planning the route we'll take to Ishi, Shimura-sama?" He did not look at the older man, but proceeded to set out the cups. "There is no way such a report could be misinterpreted as anything but a declaration of war, I am sure. After all, private messengers outside the chain of command are unarguably reliable, all the more so when they answer only to a warhawk."

Danzo turned, his single eye ablaze with carefully controlled fury. "I see the Will of Fools lives on fully in you, Uchiha. What would your parents think of your weakness?"

There was a sharp crack as the teacup in Sasuke's hand shattered, but Sasuke did not look away from his task, proceeding to place an additional cup on the desk. "We'll never know, will we, Danzo?" He stood, stepped to the side, and bowed. "Join us for tea?"

Danzo glanced down at the desk and the three teacups. He refused to show any emotion, but he admitted to himself that it was impressive how Sasuke managed to perfectly pour a tiny amount of tea into the remaining bowl of the shattered cup. "I must decline. While the Hokage works on the economy and I work on emergency plans for when we inevitably come to blows over the imprisonment of our weapon, perhaps you can continue to practice your tea service." He turned without another word and made his way out.

When the door shut, Sasuke scowled. "I apologize, Hokage-sama. That was rude of me."

Hiruzen chuckled. "This is so, Sasuke, and while we both know why you think poorly of him, he is still loyal to the village if nothing else, and worthy of a little respect. That said, I will admit that is possibly the fastest he has even been deflected from his… aggressive policy arguments."

Sasuke turned and looked Sarutobi Hiruzen, God of Shinobi, straight in the eyes. "Someday, hopefully a long time from today, the hat will be passed. He will no longer be the teammate of the Hokage, but just another retired shinobi, with no special privilege beyond whatever the new Hokage might grant. A new Hokage that will not be inclined to go to war on a whim, but might be very inclined to turn a blind eye to the actions of their peers. Especially once he reads a few old reports on famous events of the village. You know how this story ends, Hokage-sama."

Hiruzen sighed, slipping off his hat and running a hand over his wrinkled brow. "I won't lie, I hope he passes before me. It pains me to think of my friend…" he trailed off, before he sighed and pulled the hat back into place.

"I know how this story ends," he said, his eyes hardening. "And I won't pretend he didn't earn it. But that is then, and this is now. Let's have that tea and have a look at those reports."

Hyuga Oshi stood perfectly still in the darkness even as he allowed his byakugan to pass around the walls of the little room he was in. He'd considered ignoring the missive he'd received, he had more than enough trouble dealing with the fallout of Hiashi's foolish decree without tying his cause to a falling star. But something about the way the note was written made him curious, and so here he was, waiting for-

"Hyuga Oshi," said a voice from directly behind him.

Oshi spun, arms out, then stopped when he saw who had creeped up on him. His heart hammered in his chest. Impossible! The Byakugan cannot be blocked! After a moment, he dropped his arms and stood at ease, and while he thought he saw his host smirk at him, that moment passed in a blink of the eye, and the man stood there with the same dull, disinterested gaze he always had. "What do you want from me, Shimura-san?"

Danzo took another step forward and nodded in response to the respect given. "I want nothing from you, Oshi, other than to help you correct a grievous decision made recently by your clan leader. The loss of the byakugan would be a fatal blow to the village."

Oshi almost trembled as anger overcame him. "I assure you," he said coldly, "I am doing all that I can to stop this foolishness. Already I work to gather the other elders of the clan. Already I prepare the needed evidence to-"

Danzo waved one hand sharply, and Oshi fell silent. "We both know that there is no evidence to gather. No rules to bring up. Your clan is built around a single all powerful decision maker, and no amount of words can simply make them change their mind." Danzo stepped forward and pressed a small object into Oshi's hand before stepping back. "Are you truly doing everything in your power to resolve this problem?"

Oshi looked down at the kunai now in his hand and blanched. "Danzo-sama, never mind the legality and legitimacy issues, I hold only twenty percent of our clan to my view, and many of them older. Any rebellion would fail before it began. The all seeing eye is a great boon to us, but it is also a great obstacle to surmount."

Danzon nodded, as if he heard nothing unusual, and then the man smiled, and Oshi was both chilled and enthralled as he reached up to the bandages wrapped around his head. "And would you say the same if I provided you a means to strike unseen, Hyuga?"

A/N: Well, then. Sorry for the long, long delay. Life got bad, but now improves, and I find myself finally with time and will to write. Originally I was going to handle Sakura and Sasuke separate, but found it hard to write that way, as there was too much time passing between moments.

Got a few mentions on the size of the world. In short, the world of Naruto is not in any way the same scale as the real world, mostly apparent when you compare shinobi travel speeds to time traveled. Like the economy, the world in canon changes as needed by the story. From my point of view, the world must be bigger to explain the degree of isolation it has for a setting with fast moving water walking ninja. I might have been able to justify it otherwise, but I am not inclined to put that much effort into it, to be honest.

Oh, and Kakashi will be getting his own events, I just couldn't cram them into the current subplot. They will be of major plot importance. And that specific moment will probably become the point where I reveal the "for want of a nail" moment of this fic and why things have changed.

A Guest left me a literal wall of text detailing minutiae of the Narutoverse, and to be honest, I passed over much of it. That said, they did correct a specific jutsu (the near-invisibility one Naruto picked up from Jiraiya) that makes sense. If I remember, I'll have to fix that.

Storyman09 basically asked how hard it might be to learn elemental jutsu. For me, the answer is "fucked if I know." Canon is so inconsistent that I decided not to worry too much about it. For my fic, all jutsu are easy to learn in theory, but hard to master well enough to be effective in high level combat, with a few exceptions based on concentration and control (like rasengan and full-on puppetry).

Oracle10 would prefer my A/N's be after the omake, but I have it as it is to give it a bit of separation between fic canon and non-canon, as well as providing any background or thought processes worth mentioning while the main story is still predominant in the reader's mind.

Omake Theater Presents:

The Tale of Sal and the Curry of Life

"Hello!"

Sal looked over from his cooktop to see a young man dressed in green with a bowl cut waving at him cheerfully. He sighed and stepped to the counter, leaning heavily on it. "Whats do you want?"

The man seemed slightly confused, as if things were not going according to script, but the moment passed and he recovered. "Yosh!" he shouted, making Sal wince at the volume. "I am in need of a quick meal, as I am quite busy today with my duties. Might I have some curry with which to spice up my life?!"

Sal stared at the man with open disgust. What volume. What manners. What… youth. Even as a kid, Sal never had anywhere near the energy and youthful innocence of this strange man, and he wanted nothing more to do with it.

"Sure," he grumbled, moving back to the cooktop and looking over his spice rack. "You want some spice, yeah?" The green man nodded, and Sal gave him a big, dishonest smile as he opened up the Cumin pot. One tablespoon per serving,he thought to himself. Wait, did I say tablespoon? Oh, my bads. He grabbed one of the big wooden spoons he used for the big pot and scooped a decent pile of the stuff into to bowl before placing it in a paper carryout box.. "Heres you goes, one Curry of Life. Enjoy."

The man bowed politely enough, paid with a generous tip before he dashed off with curry bowl in hand, and Sal thought nothing more about the annoying man until he returned the next day, bowl in hand and his eyes wide.

"No refunds," said Sal curtly.

If anything, the man's eyes sparkled even more than before. "Far from it!" he shouted, holding the bowl aloft. "Truly, that was the Curry of Life! The spice! The heat! The flavor! I came instead to beg, to plead that you honor me by preparing another bowl for me!"

Sal stared, flabbergasted, at the big, open, honest, goofy grin. He looked down at the bowl and saw it was only half empty. Then his eyes darted over the to cooking bowl, previously abandoned, and still containing the disgusting glop he'd given the man the day before. "Sure," he said, retrieving it from where it sat by the sink, "yeah, sure thing. Lets me just get a fresh batch going..."

A second scoop of cumin. A handful of cayenne pepper. All in the same single serving, packaged in a fresh new bowl and box, and handed off to a grateful man with thick eyebrows and a habit of paying… holy shit, he just paid me enough to replace my stove!

Sal spent the night and morning sweating bullets. Not only did he essentially poison a golden goose, but with that kind of money, he must be important with a capital "death penalty." Only on the man's glowing arrival that afternoon did Sal relax.

"Truly, you are the master of the spice of life! Yesterday I could only eat a third of that glorious lifegiving curry!"

"Truly, Kakashi, you must try this most embracing curry!"

Sal shrugged and added another dose of cumin to the ever-simmering pot. If this guy can take it, well…

"Lee! Come and meet Sal, the creator of the greatest gift, the Curry of Life!"

"Yes, Gai-sensei!" shouted Lee, missing the moment Sal dropped in a ghost pepper. He had long since reached the point where mere curry ingredients were insufficient. If this goofball didn't keep me in business…

Kakashi looked at the ANBU assembled for his mission, but one was missing. "Gator, report in! Gator?"

Cat held up her hand. "Sir, he's not clear for duty anymore."

"What? I've seen him stab enemies to death with two broken arms and a hole the size of an apple in his gut! What the hell could possibly-"

"Sir, he got the assignment to taste test Maito Guy's lunch last week, and-"

Kakashi hissed between his teeth. "Maah, maah, say no more. Poor Gator. He was three days from retirement, you know…"

Sal stared at the tiny woman that his one remaining customer had brought to his food stand. Guy always paid well, which was good, because the smell of the eternally rendering, increasingly gut searing curry now permeated the stand, driving all but the most resolute of souls to cross the street in passing.

He didn't bother saying anything. Surely she knew better.

"The same, please," she said quietly.

Sal bit back a sigh and dumped a bit more cumin in. The cumin levels had gone down in the last few weeks, so he figured now would be the time to replenish. He dropped the two bowls of curry on the counter and waited for the screaming to start.

Sal stared at the two bowls on his counter.

Fuck, he thought numbly. There's twos of them now.