A/N: I got so many feels over last night's episode and especially this scene. ! Hopefully I do it justice, and let me know if you all like it. Please, I love reviews like the 100 Fandom loves Bellarke!

"Are you on the ground unit?" a small blonde boy asked him, tugging on his borrowed uniform.

He was utterly screwed, what the hell was he supposed to say to that? He thought as his heartbeat skyrocketed, just staring at the inquisitive little boy before him.

"Uh-"he couldn't get his brain to function, and he could start to feel sweat form on his hairline.

Throwing one quick glance at Maya, he turned back to the boy and sliding that careless fa├žade over his features he answered the boy. "Yeah." Hoping that the simple answer would quell his questioning and he could finally get to Jasper and the rest of the 47 trapped in this godforsaken mountain, and get the hell out from under ground, and see the sky and feel the breeze brush through his curls. To see Clarke again.

"My dad's training to be on the ground unit" the kid piped up again, pride shining through his eyes and soft smile.

Would this kid just move on already, and stop asking questions he thought, growing antsier with each passing second.

"I hope he makes it." He said, voice raw with emotion. He had to gulp down the unsurmountable hatred he felt towards the men of the mountain as he looked at this little boy. He's probably no older then I was when O was born he thought as the kid beamed up at him.

The kid seemed to be satisfied with his response because he turned from him and headed back towards his classmates and bemused teacher.

Letting out a breath he had no idea he was holding, he cracked his sore neck.

"Excuse me, mister" the kid spoke up again, gaining his attention.

Christ, he couldn't seem to catch a break. "Yeah?" he questioned, eyeing the kid's teacher fold her arms and stare.

"What's it like on the ground?" he asked curiously.

Before he could respond, a thousand different images flashed before his eyes; Octavia bathed in sunlight for the first time as she exited the dropship, the meadow behind the wet with morning dew behind Camp Jaha, the deep chill that sets in your bones before a relaxing swim but mostly he saw images of the Sky people's princess, his princess. Clarke Griffin. Her pale skin glowing in the firelight, her sapphire eyes, the delicate smile that graced her lips when she was truly content and full of two-headed deer meat. The set of her jaw when she stood up to him, over something inconsequential and trivial. His princess rushing towards him, after weeks of thinking she was dead and gone and the feel of her in his arms, fitting like a missing puzzle piece.

A soft clearing of Maya's throat jostled him out of the memories that had engulfed him.

He felt his throat constrict with something that was most definitely not love, before he pushed down the idea and answered coolly "Beautiful".

The boy was happy with the answer as he darted back to his teacher and entered into an adjoining room, with teacher in tow.

It took a moment for the name on the back of the curious boy's pack to register before he felt his gut plummet somewhere near his feet.

Lovejoy that's whose uniform he is wearing, the blood that is added to his hands and another ghost to avoid.

For a split second he remembers the days before Octavia, when it was just him and mom. All his other classmates had a mom and a dad, and he didn't. The bitterness at that circumstance is what turned him into the man he is now, and for a minute he wishes he could take back what he did, give back the uniform, before he remembers Clarke. Her telling him that she needs him, trusts him, believes in him.

"There just kids" he muses staring at the empty spot that the innocent boy once occupied.

"What did you expect?" Maya questions shooting him a look filled with curiosity and a little hesitancy.

An image of the men in white suits fills his vision, and he unconsciously tenses his hand on the gun he is carrying.

"Monsters" He says voice wavering, thinking of the little boy with the golden hair.