It all started when Etna and Flonne had finally grown old enough to develop adult-like bodies.
Etna was now FAR more developed in every area...and her taste in outfits hadn't changed one bit. She enjoyed the stares she got from most males. It meant her days of being flat-chested were finally over.
Flonne's appearance hadn't changed much, aside from growing taller. She had decided to start wearing a long white gown that went all the way down to her ankles.
They had both matured quite a lot.
And this irritated Laharl. A lot. The two girls never heard the end of it. He was throwing temper tantrums every time he saw them, whining about how he wanted to be an adult too. And to Etna, it got old. Fast. Even Flonne eventually grew tired of it. And so, the two decided they needed some reprieve from the prince's whining. They decided to "vacation" somewhere until he grew up a bit.
So, after leaving a hastily written note that said "Leaving for a few hundred years. Don't wait up. Etna and Flonne.", they stole one of Laharl's airships and took off, eventually deciding to visit somewhere they never went before: the land of the living.
Etna sighed in relief as the sound of Laharl yelling in the distance finally faded away. "Finally! I thought we'd never stop hearing it..."
"He sounded pretty mad." Flonne replied.
"Who cares? The big baby's gonna have to grow up. Both figuratively and literally." She tapped her fingers against her seat. "...Where is that DAMN Prinny with my DAMN cream pie already?!"
"Coming, Master Etna!" A Prinny hurriedly ran out of the kitchen, holding a banana cream pie over his head. "I brought-" The small penguin-like creature tripped with a yelp, and the pie was sent flying directly at the person it was addressed to. With a SPLAT, Etna's entire face found itself smeared with the soft cream.
Flonne and the Prinny stared wide-eyed as the pie tin slowly slid off of the demon's face. After a few moments, Etna wiped some of the cream off to reveal her eyes, looking eerily calm. The Prinny laughed nervously.
"Uh...P-Please forgive me, Miss Etna." Exactly one second later, the Prinny screamed as he was sent flying out the window of the airship.
"Bye, Prinny!" Flonne waved. "...Penguins can fly, right?"
"Nope." Etna replied casually, checking out her nails. She frowned when she saw some cream on them, then licked it off. "Mmm. Not bad." Flonne frowned, then looked out the window and grinned.
"Wow! Look! The living world! It's so green, and pretty!"
"Yeah, it's okay." Etna replied as she reclined in her seat.
"Who's flying, anyway?"
"I got one of the prinnies to do it."
Cut to the cockpit, where a Prinny was fast asleep. Said Prinny fell forward in its seat, and hit a big red button that said "DO NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, PUSH THIS BUTTON. QUITE FRANKLY, I'M NOT TOO SURE WHY WE BOTHERED TO PUT THIS BUTTON ON IN THE FIRST PLACE, BUT KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF."
Etna and Flonne were looking over the scenery, when suddenly, a siren began blaring.
"Huh? The hell's happen-IIIIIIING!" Etna was interrupted as the ship began to spin wildly out of control, sending her and Flonne bouncing off of walls and the floor.
"THIS IS KINDA FUUUUUUN!" Flonne called out cheerfully.
"CAN IT, YOU DITZ!" Etna snapped. Then, one of the windows broke when she crashed into it. She managed to grab ahold of the sill...then Flonne was sent flying out the same window.
"Catch me, Etna!" She called out as she grabbed the demon's tail and held on tightly. "Thank you!"
Etna hissed at the pain of having her tail pulled, and tried to scramble back into the ship...until a Prinny hit her in the face, launching her, Flonne, and the small penguin-like entity out of the ship. The trio fell down to Earth, screaming all the way, until eventually, they slammed into a large shed with earth-shattering force, knocking them unconscious and causing the whole thing to collapse on them.
When the dust cleared, the only parts of them that were visible from under the pile of rubble were Flonne's hand, and Etna's rear end. Then, the Prinny, who had fallen unconscious due to the fall, landed perfectly on its master's butt. They remained absolutely still...
4 hours later...
Vernon Dursley was in an absolutely terrible mood. It had been a terrible sales day, and he had to deal with whiny customers all day, most of which didn't buy a thing. He knew how he'd deal with his stress... Angrily, he pulled his car into his driveway...and saw the pile of rubble that was once his shed. Staring with his mouth agape, his mind didn't process the hand, the butt or the penguin visible on the rubble. It leaped straight to blaming his worthless freak of a nephew. He was responsible, Vernon just knew it. Storming into his house, he threw the door open. A shame Petunia was grocery shopping and Dudley was at school...They would have been great help in teaching the freak a lesson.
15 minutes later...
Etna groaned as she stirred awake. She looked around. It was very dim...
'Ah, crap, I'm covered in rubble...' She thought in aggravation. 'Wait, what the hell is on my ass?' She heard a familiar sounding groan. "GET OFF ME, YOU BIRDBRAIN!" She snapped as she whipped the Prinny off of her rear with her tail. Then she realized her position. "Don't tell me...AGH, DAMN IT, THAT'S SO DEGRADING!" She began struggling to get out of the rubble.
5 minutes later...
Flonne's hand twitched, and after five seconds, she managed to pry her head out of the rubble, along with her other hand. She used her hands to push the rest of her body out, and yawned while stretching.
"That was a real doozy..." She mused. "Oops! We broke something!" Then she heard frustrated growls from next to her. She looked over to see Etna's butt wiggling as she tried to free herself from her humiliating predicament. "Hi, Etna!"
"GET ME OUT OF HERE!"
"Oh! R-Right!" Flonne grabbed her friend's tail, and began to pull as hard as she could. All this did was cause pain to shoot into Etna's body.
"Don't worry, I almost got you..."
"I'll help too, dood!" The prinny ran up to help in the tail pulling. Etna snapped.
"OKAY, STOP IT! YOU TWO ARE USELESS! I'LL GET OUT OF HERE BY MYSELF!" Flonne and the Prinny obediently let go, leaving Etna to her wiggling.
As they waited, a noise sounded throughout the afternoon air that got Flonne's attention.
"Um...Etna? P-Please hurry up..."
"Th-there's really bad noises coming from the house over here...It sounds like screaming-"
"HERE'S AN IDEA! WHY DON'T YOU PUT YOURSELF IN THIS POSITION AND SEE HOW LONG YOU TAKE TO GET OUT?!" Flonne pouted.
"You're so mean..."
Finally, Etna snapped, and the debris that covered her exploded off, finally freeing her from her compromising position. She rose to her feet, stormed over to the sweating Prinny, then kicked it as hard as she could, sending it flying into the air. She panted heavily as Flonne watched the Prinny sail away into the distance, then sighed.
Then, she heard what Flonne heard. Curious, she approached the door. She couldn't quite hear, so she tried pressing her ear against it.
"TAKE THAT, FREAK! RUIN OUR PROPERTY WILL YOU, YOU INGRATE?! I'LL SHOW YOU! TAKE THAT!"
Then, whimpering. The whimpering of a child.
Flonne came up behind her friend to listen as well.
"THIS IS FOR RUINING OUR SHED!"
Flonne's eyes widened.
"Oh dear! Someone's getting punished for what we did, Etna!" No response. "...Etna?" She looked down at the demon to see that she was quite literally burning with rage. The fallen angel slowly backed away, and her demon friend roared in anger and planted her foot firmly into the door, knocking it straight down. Her mind had barely processed the image of a huge, obese man violently beating on a tiny child, and with an enraged scream, she gave him no time to react as she lunged at him and pinned him down.
Demons weren't the most compassionate beings in the world, but they were far from heartless. And most demons drew the line at child abuse. Etna was no exception.
Vernon was stunned. One moment, he was giving the freak his rightfully deserved punishment, the next he was being pinned down by a woman in a...rather revealing outfit that actually had him blushing.
Etna noticed the blush and scowled. This bastard had no right to start drooling over her! Without missing a beat, she pulled out a spear from who the hell knows where, and held the tip against his throat.
"...I have to deal with a little whiny brat for five months straight. I get a pie in my face. I get tossed around on an airship. I lost the airship that has pretty much all of my minions in it. I get knocked unconscious, buried under a pile of rubble with only my ASS sticking out. I have a couple of IDIOTS trying to get me out by PULLING ON MY GOD DAMN TAIL! AND NOW I FIND A MORBIDLY OBESE WALRUS BEATING THE SH*T OUT OF A LITTLE KID?! Normally I'd let you off by breaking every bone in your body and crippling you for life...BUT YOU CAUGHT ME IN A BAD MOOD!"
As Etna began to beat Vernon, Flonne looked between the beating and the scared child, and decided the child was the top of her priority list. So, without missing a beat, she briskly moved to the little boy's side and kneeled down to get a better look at him.
He was bruised and bleeding, his lip was busted, and his eye was swollen shut. And he was desperately trying to crawl away from her.
Flonne was well and truly horrified by what she was seeing. Slowly, she reached out to try to pick him up. Moments before she even touched him, he flinched away and let out a soft whimper. The fallen angel froze and bit her lip sadly. Then, she placed a hand on his cheek and rubbed it gently. The child flinched at the contact, but slowly, yet surely relaxed at the calming gesture. He looked up to see the young woman smiling down at him gently.
"A-Are you an angel?" Flone giggled.
"Well, I was, but I'm not really considered one anymore..."
Her voice calmed Harry down. He sensed no malicious intent from her whatsoever. He smiled at Flonne, and she smiled back. Then, wordlessly, the fallen angel scooped the little boy into her arms. Harry was stunned for a moment, but that quickly gave way to content when the woman stroked his cheek.
"Aww, look at you, you're such a cute little thing..." Flonne cooed softly. Then, Vernon let out a particularly agonized yell of pain, causing both of them to flinch. Flonne slowly turned her head to look...and promptly let out a soft squeak and put a hand over the child's eyes to keep him from seeing that his uncle had gotten killed via impalement by a spear. She had to distract him. "Um...What's your name, sweetie?" She asked, trying to keep the edge from her voice.
"H-Harry..." He replied softly.
"Hi, Harry. I'm Flonne."
"Hi, Miss Flonne..."
Etna smirked at the fat man's corpse, then watched as a prinny slowly materialized next to it. The prinny looked around in confusion, then saw its old body and screamed in horror before trying to run away...only to collide with a certain redhead's boot.
Etna grinned evilly, then picked Vernon up by his head and held him up to eye level. "Sorry, fat boy. You're my property now." The prinny began to sweat horribly, and let out a soft squeaking noise. Etna smirked and casually tossed him at the wall. "Don't move, or I'll have you scrubbing floors for six years." Vernon stood rooted to the spot in horror, eyeing his dead ex-body.
Etna approached Flonne, who was still talking quietly to Harry.
"Hey Flonne! How's the ki-" She stopped mid-sentence and hissed with a grimace when she got a better look at him and his injuries. Flonne smiled regardless.
"He's happy now! Look!" She held Harry out to Etna. Harry looked up at the other woman, and flinched away with a whimper. She didn't look as nice as Flonne... Etna turned to Flonne with a raised brow. "...Well, he WAS happy..." Etna rolled her eyes and grumbled something under her breath.
"So what should we do with him?"
"Hmm..." Flonne put a hand under her chin thoughtfully...then her eyes began to sparkle. "OOH! LET'S KEEP HIM!"
"DON'T TALK LIKE HE'S AN ANIMAL WE FOUND ON THE STREET!"
Harry cringed at the volume of Etna's voice and tried to disappear as much as he could into Flonne's arms. Flonne pouted.
"Shhh. You're scaring the poor dear." Etna sighed, then kneeled down. She frowned when Harry flinched away from her.
"...Sorry about that, kid." Harry looked up at her shyly, then nodded to show that he accepted her apology.
"Yay, he likes you!" Flonne said cheerfully. "Harry, this is my friend Etna!"
"H-Hi, M-Miss Etna..." Etna smiled ever so slightly.
"So, Harry, huh? ...Good name." Harry blushed at her words.
"Now hold on just a moment!" Everyone turned to see Vernon glaring at them from across the room. "You break into my house, attack me, and turn me into THIS, then try to enslave me while gushing over that...that FREAK?! I'M NOT GOING TO STAND FOR IT! I'LL GIVE THAT FREAK WHAT HE DESERVES NO MATTER WHAT I LOOK LIKE!" And with those words, he rushed at Flonne, and began pathetically flailing his wings at her, trying to get to Harry, who hugged the blonde tightly and cringed away from the Prinny.
And then Vernon was sent rolling across the room by a powerful kick from his new master Etna. As Etna stormed over to her newest slave, Flonne gently cupped her hand around Harry's chin and pulled his head up to look into her warm, smiling face.
"Don't worry, you sweet little thing. Flonne won't let the mean old penguin hurt you." Harry cuddled closer into the fallen angel's bosom, calmed by her words.
Meanwhile, Etna grabbed Vernon and was now shaking him violently.
"YOU SON OF A BITCH, WHAT DID I TELL YOU?! YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO STAY IN THAT SPOT! NOT ONLY DID YOU DISOBEY ME, BUT YOU ATTACKED HARRY AGAIN! YOU'D BETTER BRACE YOURSELF, BECAUSE YOU'RE GONNA BE WORKING YOUR WORTHLESS ASS OFF FOR YEARS TO COME! AND IF I CATCH YOU NEAR HARRY AGAIN, I'LL BEAT YOU FOR A WEEK STRAIGHT! STAY AWAY FROM HIM, DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?!"
Vernon was dizzy from all the shaking, and his eyes were swirling anime style. "Y-Yes, ma'am..."
"Good." Etna then slammed him into the ground and rested her foot on him. "Make sure you remember that, tubby." Then she applied pressure to the prinny's back, causing him to let out an agonized groan...and then a squeak, like a rubber ducky. Etna stood in surprise. "What the...?" She did it again. The squeak sound came once more. "Oh my God, that's HILARIOUS!" Laughing hysterically, she repeatedly stomped on Vernon, causing him to let out a chorus of squeaks.
Flonne giggled as she listened to the squeaking penguin. "He deserves it." She said softly to Harry. "It's what he gets for hurting a little cutie like you." Harry blushed again. These women were much nicer to him than he deserved...
Etna finally grew bored of making Vernon squeak, so she approached Flonne once more. She frowned when she looked at Harry's injuries.
"We should really do something about that, Flonne. ...Hint, hint?" Flonne looked at her in confusion and tilted her head.
"Hint? Hint to what?" Etna looked at her flatly and facepalmed.
"He-LLO?! Healing magic?!" Flonne blinked, then giggled.
"Oopsie! I forgot!"
Harry's eyes widened.
"Th-That word's n-not allowed in this house...Uncle Vernon said so..."
"Yeah, well, Uncle Vernon's my slave now, so what he says doesn't matter." She paused, then grabbed Vernon and squeezed him once more, causing the squeaky sound to come out.
"PLEASE stop..." Vernon moaned.
Harry nodded, not wanting to argue...then, there was a bright flash of light. He closed his eyes...and when he opened them again, he was surprised to feel that his injuries were gone. He looked up at Flonne with wide eyes. She giggled.
"You're even more cute and cuddly without all those owies all over you!" Harry smiled and rested his head back on her chest. He was very comfortable...His eyes began to feel droopy...Flonne giggled. "Aw, are you sleepy? Why don't you take a little nap, sweetheart?" Harry smiled gratefully, and within moments, he was out like a light. "EEEEEEEEEEE...He's soooooo CUUUUUUUUUUTE..." Flonne gushed quietly. Etna caught herself smiling fondly at the sleeping child, and internally sighed.
'Why does he have to be so damn adorable?'
Flonne gave her friend the puppy eyes. "Can we keep him? Pleeeeease?"
Internally, Etna's immediate reaction was "F*ck YEAH we can keep him." But she didn't want to appear too soft, so she instead forced on a small pout and said "Fiiiine."
"Yay! You're the bestest!" Flonne wrapped an arm around her friend, who smiled in return.
"Yes. Yes I am. Now let go of me."
"Okay!" Flonne let go with a huge grin.
Then, there was a knock on the door. Etna peeked out the window to see who it was, glared, then stormed over to open the door. Behind it was a very haggered looking Prinny. Etna put her hands on her hips and glared at it.
"Forgive me, Master Etna..."
Etna huffed, then grabbed the Prinny's face and began stretching it. "And where the hell have YOU been?!"
"Whatever." Etna said as she let go of the Prinny's face. Then she picked it up and tossed it over to Vernon. "Meet your new co-worker. And don't interrupt me when I'm watching over children."
The prinny stood, then turned to Vernon. "Hey, Dood."
"Bugger off." Vernon snapped. Etna went back to Flonne and Harry. Harry made a soft, content hum and snuggled up closer to Flonne when she began running her fingers through his hair.
'Awwww..." Etna thought. 'God damn it, this kid's making me soft...'
"...Can we leave now? This place sucks." Etna chuckled.
"Fine. C'mon, minions." She grabbed Vernon and the Prinny under her armpits and moved for the door. Vernon burst into tears.
" MY LIFE IS OVEEEEEEEER!"
"You bet your ass it is." Etna replied flatly as she walked out the door. Flonne giggled, and rose to her feet. She looked down at the little boy in her arms and smiled warmly.
"Don't you worry." She whispered into his ear. "We'll take extra good care of you." And with that, she caught up to her friend, and the two walked into the sunset.
"...Hey, Etna...You really wanted to get away from Laharl...but...Did you take any time to figure out where we're gonna stay?"