Kit: An attempt to get back into writing- Some of it's OOC and I'm sorry for that ;w; I was kinda trying to feel what It'd be like in her shoes- D; ~ Wasn't as long as I'd hoped it to be but hopefully the next will be longer, enjoy ~


He restrained her, arms wound rigidly around her shoulders; holding her captive. "We have no choice," A baritone voice barked, accompanied by a gesture of retreat.

She writhed wildly against her restraints, tears prickling at the corners of her eyes; they were going to abandon him. "He's still in there!" She shrieked, her captor's arms only securing her once more; this time more firmly.

"His sacrifice won't be in vain.." He murmured, cautious that only she was in ear shot. She convulsed, grief blinding her; obscuring her scene of reasoning "We've got to go back in there! He's still alive! We have to save him!"

"Chief?" He peered at their superior for guidance, he simply dismissed the blundering female as nothing but a nuisance.

"Knock her out," a monotonous instruction resonated through her head but before she had a chance to respond her world was rapidly descending into darkness.

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"We are gathered here today to share our mourning for the fallen, those lost to the war we wage. We're here to remember them as they were and what they've left behind for us remaining-"

The service was dreary, the clouds that obscured the sun promised rain in the coming hours and Saiko found herself regretting being hauled out to the function.

"You may now approach the caskets," One by one they approached the coffins, lowering their heads in grief; murmuring soft words of sorrow.

But they didn't say anything, his cadaver was not among the others. Sasaki Haise, Leaders of the CCG's Quinx squad; for them, there would be no mourning.

She, like the other surviving Quinx had been ushered into silence, bribed to simply be as the others were and mourn, not mentioning what had occurred during that one particular mission.

These were dark times, the darkest in a long period- Where many of the CCGs officers met their untimely demise- And the Quinx's ranks were no different. She'd watched her team mates fall in battle, one after the other; like dominos..

First Ginshi, then Urie and now... Now Sassan was gone as well- Part of her wanted to turn to Tooru for condolences but the other part of her acknowledge how fruitless such would be; so instead she grasped her arm and stared vacantly at the wooden death-beds that protruded through damp emerald and promised herself something- She wouldn't allow this to happen again...

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"Saiko-san?" An apprehensive voice fell upon the female's ears, her fingers hesitating momentarily over the key-pad of her PSP, dis-interest carved across her visage and for a brief moment she contemplated ignoring the plea, one that followed many predecessors.

"We're being ordered to meet at Head Quarters... They want us to help out a-another squad..." Her stomach churned, images flashing through her subconscious that had her rolling on her side, begging such to dissipate into the vacant space that had became her mind over the passing weeks.

"They're worried about you, you know that right Saiko? I'm worried about you as well..." Mutsuki mumbled, resting his palm against the door, a soft sigh falling from his lips. His concern was justified, after all she'd missed every dinner he'd had- every guest who'd came over to offer their condolences, even him- She'd avoided him as if he were the plagued personified.

He noted many other things about her contorting also, pieces of her generally lethargic personality melded into something more dangerous "I'll just be waiting here... If you decide to come out- I'm leaving in half an hour... Alright? Saiko?"

She didn't answer, opting to bury herself under a heap of blankets; he couldn't be gone... Not Sassan, there had to be something wrong with this- Something very wrong... She didn't know what exactly and every time she stomached the idea that he was … She felt physically Ill... could it be true? That the individual that had protected them for so long, was … dead?

No..

Hesitantly she dragged herself from her haven, blanket draped across her shoulders; collecting various abandoned artifacts as it was hauled across her bedroom floor. Saiko splayed her hand across the door, pausing for a moment before speaking.

"Tooru?" She offered, silently awaiting his reply.

"S-Saiko? You're coming?"

"Sassan isn't dead... We have to find him..." She kept her voice low, shoulders slouched, her face almost burrowed into the wood. For a moment silence thick enough to suffocate someone hung between the two of them, but then he broke it.

"How can you say that..." A whimper, the sound of someone breaking "How can you say that he's still alive! Y-You heard what they said... Dead... Gone... not coming back..."

"You have to believe me," She insisted, her teeth indenting on her bottom lip "Just trust me... We... We can't just leave him like this,"

Tooru's voice fell off, sniffling accompanying his final reply "What do you want me to do...?