This is mie very first fic .. so i just hope its okay.. its supposed to happen during the time Kai left for the Demolition boys , yup that's what i should think cuz i've started watching beyblade not to long ago cuz singapore tv is so damn slow .. the episode last sunday was the one where the bladebreakers first met the white tigers .. well thats how slow it could get *cries* and since i dun really know anything that happened then so im trying to use mie limited imagination so if the story doesn't fit the anime im really sorrie (pls dun flame.. i mean u can but dun be too harsh ^^).
yar and the song 'when i lost you' is by sarah whatmore its really nice and catchy you can download it at Whatmore--When I Lost You.mp3 cut and paste in the browser you gotta rename it to a wav file and play it on windows media player.. and the site does not belong to mi. thought the song it fits quite well and this song reminds mi of raven from zoids * l lurve raven * .. i feel his character is similar to kai , happy there's a Firefox who lurves him as much as mi.. hmm, crap. yar and rei rules !!

::this is from rei's point of view::


Well, I've tried and tried to hold this thing together

'Kai! I've finally found you, hey wait !' I called out , seeing Kai walk alone along the shops.
//(this is gonna be hard, its a rei's POV, and im a girl trying to feel how rei might feel)I had this thing for Kai, an attraction I felt ever since I first met Kai, only for it to turn into -love-. I didn't know why, for Kai being the cold son of a bitch (aishiteru: oops .. started namecalling .. but i still like kai^^) he always was. But feelings were still feelings, why of all people I must fall for , well, you.. -Kai-. I've kept the feelings inside for so long, every second it would burn brighter than ever (burning feelings .. hmm even i am confused). It hurt me, but I just could not find a way to tell you, I mean , who on earth with the right frame of mind would do that ?? So I could only cherish the times we were together , the practices, the matches. And all of a sudden you just left like that, you disappeared . 'So it's gonna end like that ??', I was really close to tears, I was really frightened I'll never see the person I loved the most again , only to find you at the match the very next day, it wasn't much better , you were on the demolition boys' side. I just blinked , I did not want to believe what I saw . All the while I was satisfied , being close to you was enough. But as enemies ..?//
But you kept walking on , you refused to even look at me. So I ran up to you, shook you hard on the shoulders, screaming into your ears.. 'KAI !!!!!! please ....'..Okay, that made you stop your tracks. You turned round, but that just did it. 'Blast it off u bunch of weaklings, get off me .. DAMMIT !!' you shoved me to the ground, and just glared. 'What do you want .. Kai, why did you leave us?? Are we .. not good enough ..?' I choked, I felt like dying. Our whole team is here for you.. we went through lots of things together.. and.. ..I love you Kai. Is that not enough? I croaked, my throat feeling thick,'Why the Demolition Boys ..?'

But you wanted more than I could give.

'Weaklings .. can't you see.. I seek for power, and I never get it from u peeps so why should I stay.. The demolition boys gave it to me. Black Dranzer. It's with me now *smirk*' He stood there in victory, his crimson eyes blazing,'So ?' So so so, I was at a lost for words, my tears I've been holding so long, ever since I met you, I caught a drop in my palm. It was twinkling in the light. I looked up, you were walking away..

I know that's not the way to live

*that night, when everyone was asleep* I rolled in my bed, I could not get to sleep. I wished I was stronger, I should move on, love only makes one weak. And I am weak now .. I should not let someone as cold as you ruin my life. But I still love you, I'll always love you, I don't ever want it to end. I wanted my feelings to last, cuz you taught me to love, to feel for someone else other than myself, for once. I know it is not right, but I want it that way, even if I could not get it.. I love you Kai .. ..

There was a time I thought that we would last forever

We won many matches together, and though you do not openly show it, I know you're really pleased with every victory. It never crossed my mind that you wanted more, I thought we would always remain as the Bladebreakers, with Chief..that made me really happy, as long im close to you, I could not ask for more. My love slowly built up that way, I would never give up on you. But now you are no longer with us , my dreams are shattered. Completely.. I'll probably never get the chance to tell you how I really felt. Or maybe it was just wishful thinking on my part, I really don't know.. I can just break down anytime, you know.. or maybe you don't. Sometimes, I wonder if you have any emotions at all, or how you felt about me..

But you pushed hard, I feel the scars
Now I don't know who you really are

Kai .. are you really like that ..?

What we had was so good

We were great as a team, everything, well almost, went our way. I was happy with all of you, Tyson , Max, Kenny.. and you, Kai. I felt really lucky to have known you, it was the best thing that happened to me. It made me much more matured, it showed me a whole new dimension, I felt feelings I never thought I could have.

What can I do to get you back

I really wish you'll come back to your senses, i am -desperate-, you know, im so confused ...

When I lost you I lost everything

I feel really lost, are you gone just like that.. my feelings are breaking down, i don't seem as confident as ever. You gave me so much, I DON'T WANNA LET GO .. you know .. though i knew it was silly. So you're gonna ruin me like that, I could only hope I don't lose myself. It can't be that bad , can it ..?

But I still want you

I'll never give up, Kai. I love you too much to give up, to start over again. I love you, and I mean it. I want you.

When I lost you I lost everything
Now I'm falling apart cos you're still in my heart

I can't stop thinking about you, I'll soon go crazy. You stole my heart, and refused to let go. My mind refuses to erase your image, it's making me suffer. For you ..? Why does it have to be this way.. I'm getting weaker, no matter how much I tried to stay strong. I don't want to fall apart, neither do I want to forget you. Why does it have to be so hard ?

When I lost you I lost everything
But I still love you

I always will, Kai ..

When I lost you I lost everything
Now I'm wasting my time cos your still on my mind

Sometimes I wished I never met you, cuz ever since then, you haunted my dreams every night, your image refused to disappear from my mind. Probably if you weren't there , life would have been easier, it'll be so much less painful. I can't turn back time, even if I could, I don't want to. I fallen too deeply for you, Kai. I'm still fallin', it's getting too deep.. but I'm still glad you gave me the chance to love.

Aishiteru, Kai ..


Okie .. that is.. please review , cuz it's mie first fic and i wanna know how it is. And there's no storyline , its more like descriptive writing *horrors* i was never good at writing stories with a storyline anyway ^^ if i dun get any reviews or i get horrible ones then i'll not continue and probably sell away this story to someone who can write betta.. but if the reviews r okay then i'll most probably continue ^^ so please give feedback .. im desperate !!
its quite fun writing this .. im so happy ^^ yall can email mi at or mie msn is .. cuz im bored at home. -aishiteru-