Here it is! The Extra Super-Special Happy Bonus Chapter! For all you out there who didn't want me to end the fic, here is a little bit extra for you all. It's what you've all been waiting for. In the words of Monty Python, it's.
The Mary-Sue Spotter's Guide

Appearance: Generally female, though the male version -Marky-Stu- has been sighted.

Their prominent (pun intended) features are their enormous mammary glands, which have the tendency to heave in a manner that is reported to be romantic, though most people find it sickening.

Their facial appearance is perfect, from the wide beautiful eyes, the clear complexion and the delicate nose to the perfect cupid's-bow lips. They enjoy pointing out their perfection at every available opportunity, to any person foolhardy enough to read or listen.

Mary-Sues may be of any race, particularly elf, half-elf, human, or any race of some beauty. They may also have unthinkable magic powers, completely out of context with their surroundings.
Behaviour: Fawning around genuine fictional characters, falling in love or simply making love with them at every chance.

Occasionally they bestow themselves, in their minds, with some originality when their tales start with some animosity between themselves and their chosen character. This is, however, only temporary, and the usual carryings- on occur.

Courting behaviour varies, depending on the particular fetish of the Mary- Sue.
Habitat: Any part of Middle Earth, or perhaps even the modern world providing that a real fictional character has appeared in it. Their particular location depends on their chosen character.

Their preferred climate depends on their needs, and they will manipulate it thus. For example, if a Mary-Sue wishes to appear pathetic and needing love, she may conjure up a rainstorm.
Diet: Man eating. Any handsome fictional character who strays in her path will be devoured.
Typical Sounds: Sighs and lovelorn noises. Includes phrases such as "Oh, my true love!" Also heavy, passionate breathing.
Warning! These creatures are to be loathed and maybe pitied, but never approached. They are extremely dangerous and are best isolated. Be especially wary, they may try to disguise their true nature with the words 'original character'. Best observed from a distance, if at all.

The above holds true for the genus of Mary-Sue, that of the Lord of the Rings one. The description is easily adapted for other fandoms.