JJ was glad that the team had decided to go over to Rossi's home after that weird case in Arizona. She hadn't called Will much, since the very thought of talking to him had unsettled her even more. She couldn't quite put her finger on why the thought of talking to her husband unnerved her, but it wasn't something that she wanted to dig too deeply at in that moment.
"So, you're riding with me, Jayje," Penelope said the moment they stepped off the elevator. JJ nodded, looking over her shoulder to see that Blake was hitching a ride with Rossi, while Morgan was going alone. She wasn't quite certain about not having her car available to her, but she knew that PG would take care of her, no matter what.
"I wonder if Rossi's girlfriend will be over as well," she murmured as she climbed into the passenger seat of Penelope's convertible. While it was a cool evening, she knew that Penelope loved driving with the top down, a sentiment that she shared, and she waited for her friend to join her to see if she had picked up on her quiet statement.
"Rossi has a girlfriend, too? What is up with this team thinking that they can keep secrets from me? And here I thought that he was still with Strauss!" she said teasingly as she turned her car on and backed out of her spot.
"Hey, we have to have some sort of private life. If you knew everything about us, you might not like us anymore." Though she tried to keep her words light, she was thinking about the dark secrets that she was keeping from everyone, everyone that mattered to her.
"Jennifer Anne Jareau, there is not a thing in this world that you could tell me that would ever make me think less of you or cause me to like you less. I love you for every little facet of your being, and I know that while you may have had to do some things in your time with the State Department that you think mar your spirit, know that there is nothing, I mean nothing, that could ever separate us."
Penelope's hand slipped off the wheel and she clasped JJ's tightly for a moment before returning her focus to driving. The rest of the way was quiet, and JJ found that she enjoyed the solitude of the night, letting the sounds of the wind and traffic fill her ears as a buffer from the loud noises in her brain. There were things buried deep inside her that she knew did not make complete sense, but she had no way to put words to them, so burying them in the graveyard of memory seemed like the safest option available to her.
Finally, though, they were pulling in behind Morgan, and Penelope killed the engine before turning and gazing at her, her head cocked to one side before she reached out and touched JJ's shoulder. "Jayje…"
"I'm fine. I just, I really want another baby, you know? I'm not getting any younger, and with how long it took to get pregnant with Henry, I'm starting to feel the ticking of the clock. This case didn't help things, either, since it just reinforced how stupid of an idea it might be to bring another life into this fucked up world."
Penelope nodded a little as she got out of the car, coming around to her side and opening the door before holding out her hand. "That is why I am glad that Kevin and I never had any accidents. I mean, I took a lot of preventative measure to ensure that we wouldn't end up pregnant, but there was always room for error. I don't think that I could raise a kid in this world."
"You'd be a good mom, just like Emily would be. Just like Erin is…"
"Erin? Erin Strauss? What would make you think that?"
JJ shrugged a little, wondering why her brain had chosen to blurt that out. "We had a few conversations while I was with the State Department. Nothing close, you know, but somehow we got on the topic of our children one day, and the way that her voice softened when she spoke of them just told me that she loves them dearly. And I know that Rossi is getting close to them, too."
"So they are still together?"
She nodded as they pulled into the driveway of Rossi's home, parking behind Derek's car. JJ was quick to jump out and head inside, hoping to see that Erin was there, that there would be a chance to talk to her and find out how things were going for her. Penelope jogged up to her side, hooking arms with her as they headed out to the backyard, finding the rest of the team gathering around the outside bar.
Erin was nowhere in sight, but Aaron noticed that they had arrived, and he gave her a warm smile as he strode over to them. "Did you make sure to call Will, to check on Henry?"
"He's on early shifts all week, and I didn't want to bother him, or wake Henry. I'll make it up to them, somehow. I just really need this moment to let my hair down."
"Don't we all, Jennifer."
A quick smile spread across her lips as she turned to see Erin joining them, a bottle of soda in her hands. "I was hoping you'd be here."
"That much a glutton for punishment?" JJ shook her head as they drifted over to Rossi, and she smiled again as he hooked his arm around her waist, pulling her close. "Then why?"
"There's just something about your presence that I'm coming to enjoy." She shrugged a little before letting out a deep breath. "This case was really weird."
"That's saying something, Jen. I don't want to think about the lengths people will go to, to make certain that their loved ones are made whole once more." Rossi turned his head to kiss the side of Erin's, and she sighed a little at the easy intimacy between them. "What is it?"
"Just wishing that things were this easy between Will and me, still. Things just haven't been right since the bank incident, and I don't know what I can do to fix things."
Erin gave her a sympathetic glance before focusing on Rossi. "There comes a time when you have to ask yourself if things are worth salvaging. Sometimes, they aren't, and you have to let go. But what is bothering you?"
"I can't explain it, really. There just seems to be this barrier between us, even though he claims to love me. It seems like he knows something that I don't, and I can't figure out what that is. It doesn't help things that I feel so guilty over losing the baby when I was with the State Department."
Erin frowned a little, looking at Rossi before turning her gaze back on JJ. "Losing the baby?"
"Yeah, I thought I put that in my report to you." Erin nodded faintly before giving her a small smile and stepping closer to Rossi. "There's just been so much change in my life lately, and I feel like I've been forgetting things. Important things. Would you mind, either of you, checking in on me every once in a while? Just to make certain I'm still on an even keel?"
"Yes, of course, Jennifer." Erin gave her a warm smile before reaching out and rubbing her arm gently. "Now, let's go get you a drink. You look like you deserve one, and I know exactly where David keeps the hidden stash."
JJ giggled as she nodded, following after the woman, a smile on her lips.