A/N: I return my subjects! So, I've been going over reviews, and an anonymous reviewer said something that really resonated with me. I love to write. But sometimes, I feel that this gift owns me, rather than I, owning it. Its like a beast inside me, this urge to create, but I can't control it very well, which results in a LOT of new stories. So as of last night, and continuing throughout the week, I'm purging stories that won't be continued.

Let me know which ones you feel should be continued, before its too late! Don't worry, many of the major ones will remain, but anything from 2008-2009 is likely going out the window with all the rest of the trash, never to be seen again. This may seem sudden I know, but I'm only purging the forgotten fics that no one cares for. Fear not, its not going to be immediate, but it WILL happen, I simply wanted to get this out as a forewarning.

This will be of of my last new stories, god willing, as I devote myself to my other works, soon to number into the hundreds, and potentially dozens as I whittle them down. I need to reassess why I want to write, for the joy of it, and I can't do that by letting you guys down with old, crappy stories I wrote in my early days.


This, my final idea for the time, as it were, sprang from watching Battle of Gods in english dub. And after that, I was treated to a rare privilege of the new Dragonball Z Revival of F in japan. And I thought to myself. What a movie! But then I thought something else. Something...strange. What was Whis up to during that long nap thirty-nine year nap Beerus took? This...

...is my idea of what could happen during those thirty-nine years.

"Oh! And what do you call this?"



~Whis and Naruto.


Before creation there must always come destruction.

I have been told this many times, countless times, more than I can count. Its literally been beaten into my head time and time again. I've got the bruises to prove it. Destruction is important, because if something isn't destroyed, it can never be renewed. Just as creation serves its own place in the cycle; if something is not created, then it cannot be destroyed. But more than that, creation is truly a beautiful thing. The old die, and the young are born.

Just as a dying forest must fall to make way for the new seeds. After all, a fire must burn before it is born anew.

But is the forest not beautiful regardless?

See, that's where my opinion differs from what I've been taught. Does there have to be a cycle? I don't think so. I'm not a serious guy; I can appreciate a good joke, now and again. But I don't think this is a joke, and I still can't bring myself to just snuff out a life like that unless I absolutely have to. Not the violent type, even back then.

They say absolute power corrupts, absolutely.

Maybe they're right.

Once you hold ultimate power in your hands, the ability to snuff out a word with the flick of your finger, life and death take on a whole new meaning. I can relate. I went from a weakling with no talent to a planet buster over the course of many years, but not without cost; I had to sacrifice and bleed, sweat and scrape, beg and cry for every scrap of power I now possess.

You cannot be reborn, until you are broken.

This is that story.

The story of a how a boy's dream died...

...and from the ashes of that dream, a God was born.

Whis was bored.

Even as the strongest being in the universe, an entity without match, a being without peer, this was the one foe he could not defeat. Oh, boredom could be forestalled of course, even ignored at times, but it could never truly be avoided, never simply destroyed like a planet.

Ah, and there was the crux of the matter.

He'd lived for countless millennia, visited planets on the edge of the abyss, stared into the great beyond and wondered at the void that lay within. He should be able to best boredom easily, he told himself.

And yet, for the life of him, here, today, in the black of space, Whis couldn't seem to escape its clutches!

But like any omnipotent deity, he went to great lengths to avoid that boredom. Great Lengths indeed. He had already circled the galaxy three thousand times in the last hour, performed two thousand push-ups and even sang one thousand verses-far, far, FAR away from Lord Beerus, naturally-of his favorite songs. Beerus himself wouldn't wake for some time yet and while Thirty-nine years was nothing but a drop in the ocean for beings like them

Hey, he was bored. Boredom, and the tireless fight to escape it, made you do strange things. He was even beginning to consider leaving this universe entirely when he saw it.

Something that caught his eye.

"Well, well, well, what have we here?"

A small, quaint little world, one he had never seen before...

Uzumaki Naruto was beginning to wonder if the universe really had it out for him. It certainly seemed that way, sometimes.

Only seven years old, he was smaller than most kids half his age, far skinnier too. Some of the kids in the academy called him frail. He liked to think of himself as lean and mean, sans the mean. He ate just enough to survive the day-to-day minutia of the village, nothing more. The stipend given to him by the Hokage was good for semi-decent food at least but little else. But he was smart and clever, and strove every day to learn as much as he could. Even when the teachers refused to teach him properly.

Ah, well. At least he was alive, right?


Alive, and hungry it seemed.

Ichiraku Ramen was one of the few places where he could actually escape all this, if only for a little while. Ayame and Teuchi were always good to him, treating him when he couldn't afford food. Still, that grand dream of becoming Hokage felt so distant in his young mind; today, he just wanted to get a bite to eat, avoid those who were looking to bash his skull in, play a few pranks, maybe, just maybe talk to her, and go home. That was all he had in mind for today when he pushed the flap aside.

Instead he found himself look at a man with teal skin, white hair, and rather effeminate features. In his seat!




The young blond fidgeted, uncertain of what action he should take. Fight and flight warred within him, alongside a generous portion of fright. Part of him wanted to tell the darn jerk to get the hell out of his seat-the rest him was screaming a warning. Danger, danger, DANGER! Run! Flee! Hide! Unbeknownst to him, the demon in his stomach was currently cowering like a kicked puppy in the presence of this being. Even the dreaded nine tails knew when it was bested.

Naruto knew nothing of it, only that something was telling him to turn around and walk back the way he came.

But he didn't.


Across his back lay a long scepter with an equally long gem floating well above it. Around his neck, a large light blue ring. His attire consisted of a maroon robe, a black cuirass with white and orange diamond decoration accompanying a blue sash. He also seemed to wear black high-heeled shoes with white spats.

All in all, Naruto thought he was terribly odd. He looked like a clown. Perhaps it was that disbelief that allowed him to speak.

"'S'cuse me, but that's my seat?"

"Hmm?" The blue-skinned man looked up from his meal with a befuddled expression, noodles hanging from his mouth. After a moment he seemed to remember he was wast still eating and swallowed them. "I'm terribly sorry. Here, I'll move." And he did just that, vacating his position for the stool beside it.

Naruto took a moment to ponder this.

It wasn't every day that someone actually listened to him outside of Ayame and her father-old man hokage's halfhearted promises certainly didn't count, there-but the idea of someone he'd never met before, a complete and total stranger actually making way from him...well, the experience was so novel he didn't quite know what to do with it. What to say, even.

Sometimes, the English language can be woefully inadequate.


So in the end, Naruto gave into hunger and climbed onto the seat. He didn't have long to wait before Teuchi noticed him.

"What'll it be, Naruto?"

"One miso ramen, please!"

"Coming right up!" Ayame chirruped happily beside her father, darting back behind the curtain.

And just like that, Naruto found himself alone with the man who had almost stolen his seat. He glanced at him out of the corner of his eye, frowning. There was something off about him. A strange presence exuded by a being he couldn't bring himself to understand. A god. A deity. But to Naruto, he was just a strange man with white hair. Curious, certainly, weird, but, dangerous? He didn't think so. Perhaps, had he known this stranger was capable of annihilating him-and his world-with a flick of the wrist, he would have been more wary.

Because then, to his shock, the blue man looked back.

Naruto stiffened.

"I-Is there something on my face?"

"No, no," the pale one reassured him. "I was just thinking."

Curiosity compelled him to inquire.

"What about?"

That white brow rose marginally. "About why you have that demon sealed in your stomach."

Naruto nearly fell off his chair!

"D-D-D-Demon?! What're you talking about?!"

"Oh." the man blinked. "I take it you didn't know."


Awkward didn't even begin to describe it.

"Its quite alright, nothing to be surprised about. I've seen stranger things than seals in my day. Although," a slender finger jabbed Naruto in the stomach, eliciting a startled squawk of surprise from the blond, "Whoever wove it did a shoddy job. They should have just killed the beast and given you the energy-that way you wouldn't have to deal with its hatred. Still, that's an impressive amount of power locked away in your body. Are there others like you? Are you the strongest of your kind?" The constant onslaught of questions threw him so hopelessly of his game that he couldn't even begin to recover.

He had no idea that he was being scrutinized as well; that for every instant in which he tried to assess this man, that man assessed him. Evaluated him, and the curious strength he'd sensed within his body. The seven-year-old never stood a chance.

"I dunno?"

"Well, don't worry about it." the man reassured him. "I'm sure you'll be quite powerful some day, with or without that."

"So confused right now..

"One miso ramen for you, and a mystery bowl for our guest." And then Ayame came swooping in and crushed his argument altogether. Reminded of his hunger, Naruto snatched up the bowl and dug into it with gusto. A light laugh came from the stranger.

"You certainly seem to enjoy that."

"Yup! Miso ramen's the best!"

"Oh! And what do you call this?" the whitehead inquired, pointing to his own bowl. "I'm rather curious myself."

Naruto scratched the back of his head, nervously. He was only seven after all; he wasn't entirely sure he should be talking to this man. Far be it form him not to enlighten someone on the wonders of ramen, though. He was beginning to think this man wasn't entirely sane...

"That's super chicken teriyaki." he said with a slight sweatdrop, trying not to stare as Whis gobbled down the noodle broth with great gusto. What madness was this? The man acted like he'd never tasted ramen before in all his life. Heresy! Ramen was supposed to the food of the gods! Ramen was all! Well, at least it was to him...


Another beat of silence passed between them as they ate. "You got a name, mister?"

"Ah." the stranger sighed, dabbing at his pale mouth with a napkin. "I do indeed. You may call me Whis. Might I know yours?"


"A pleasure to meet you, then, Naruto. Oh! I simply must know what this is!"

"Well, that's what I'm having...

What followed was a strange, but amusing series of events as Whis ordering everything Ichiraku had to offer; sampling wares, each time asking what it was.

"Tokyo tempura."

"Glorious! And this?"

"So sukiyaki."

"Heavenly! What about that?"

"Asian barbecue pork."

"Sublime! The flavor is impeccable! Now, whatever might that be?"

"That's a Wonton Bomb."

"I lives up to the name! Ooh, and those?"

"Extra kick Yuzu."

"Hey, move it brat!"

The sudden exclamation baffled Naruto, until he realized it wasn't Whis who had spoken to him. A large hand came swinging in from the left and swatted him across the head before he could turn and blink, knocking him out of the seat to the ground with contemptuous ease. He looked up and glowered at the one responsible. He knew that voice. That face. Tarro, the butcher. His name was literally his career; a large, beefy man who had a penchant for a loose tongue and looser fists.

Just another man looking down at him, calling him scum.

Now that he knew the reason, it made his blood boil.

"Hey, Tarro!" he cried. "I was sitting there!"

The large man grunted.

"Demon spawn should sit on the floor. Oi, Teuchi!" A meaty fist pounded the counter. "I'm hungry! Hurry up and get me some grub!"

Whis simply turned his head.

"That was uncalled for. You should give him his seat back." His body shifted ever so slightly on the stool Naruto noticed with a slight cringe, fingers drumming harmlessly against the bowl. He was almost certain that his new friend was about to get himself killed.

Tarro growled, his thick neck turning towards the lanky-and seemingly feeble-man who'd dared to challenge him.

"Oh? And whaddya gonna do about it, you damn clown-

In response, the God leaned forward and flicked him in the face.



Naruto could only gawp at the tear of destruction that followed; one moment Tarro was sitting in his seat, the next Whis flicked a finger and the beefy man went flying out of Ichiraku. Sheer chaos was left behind in the wake of his abrupt departure; the street looked as though a meteor had plowed into it from on high. At the far end of the block lay a steaming, smoldering body that undoubtedly belonged to Tarro. He'd flown so swiftly that the very air had ignited around him, liquifying his very skin.

Ayame balked and scurried back into the kitchen. "Oh. Um...ah...I need to wash the dishes!"

A beat of silence passed between the rest, after that.

"How rude of him." Whis sniffed. "I thought this planet was more civilized than that. Still," he tilted his head back and laughed softly.

"What a lovely day!"

Naruto's head whipped around so hard he nearly gave himself whiplash.


"My apologies if I frightened you, but simply I have not had this much fun in ages!" the god proclaimed cheerily, lowering his now empty bowl to the counter amidst the rest. "Its a rare thing when I can sample so many delicacies in one day and smite fools like that without having to worry about a planet." He noticed Naruto's disbelief and smiled pleasantly. "And, as a token of my thanks, I have an offer for you. Although, no, no, its too soon." He leaned back, scrutinizing him. "I'm not sure you'd be able to handle it, even if you wanted to...

The boy sank his teeth into the bait like a starving shark.

"What? WHAT! Tell me!"

Whis's smile grew another fraction of an inch.


"How would you like to become the New God of Destruction once Lord Beerus kicks the bucket?"

(Galaxies away...)


Bills sneezed in his sleep, flopped around, rolled over, and dozed once more.

"God...Super Saiyan...God...


Naruto blinked.



Thee times.

"Lord? New God of what now?"

"Right, right," Whis nodded, head bobbing woefully as he rose to his feet. "I suppose explanations are required." Taking his staff in hand he began walking, leaving the boy to clamor after him. "You see, the God of Destruction happens to be an esteemed pupil of mine. He likes to take a nap every few centuries or so however, which leaves me with very little to do. Boredom is a terrible thing, you know. Surely you understand that?"

Naruto had no idea what was happening here; what was going on. Was this a dream? His little mind was left spinning like a top, eyes rolling as he struggled to process what was going on. He could only nod and gulp as they walked past Tarro's corpse. No one even looked at them. As if they simply weren't there. As if they didn't exist at all.

Still in shock, he could only follow Whis.

"And you're asking me...what?"

"What I'm asking you this: how would you like to become a god?" came the renewed inquiry as the deity glanced down at him. "It would require years of training of course, and you'd have to devote yourself to it utterly, but I assure you the results are well worth it. Not that I wouldn't benefit from it too of course; I'd actually have someone to talk to, and in turn you'd have a mentor."

"But I want to be Hokage." Naruto protested weakly.

"A God is most certainly better than a Hokage." Whis promised him, gently rapping his forehead with his staff. "I'd even go so far as to say you'd be superior. You would stand above all others, be without equal, without peer against any other beyond myself-and Lord Beerus of course. Oh, don't make that face! Its not like I'm forbidding you to come back here once you've completed your training. In fact," he chortled, "I actually think it might be amusing."

The silence was telling.

Finally Whis slowed, and it was then that Naruto realized where the God had been leading him. The gates of Konoha loomed before them; great, towering walls of wood and steel barring passage to all but the chosen. It was here that Whis faced him at last. And it was here, that Naruto dared to ask the question that had been burning in the back of his mind ever since Whis leveled Tarro like a field of wheat.

"Would I be strong?"

"The strongest." Whis reaffirmed.

Naruto looked at him long and hard, and the severity of that expression nearly made Whis weep for the childhood the boy never had. There such scars on his psyche, wounds that might never truly heal. But he felt that he owed it to him to try. What he said next however, made him rethink that notion.

"Stronger than you?"

"Hmm." For the first time since they'd met, the deity's face lost its smile. He seemed to seriously consider the question for a long moment. At last, he shrugged. "Well, I doubt you'd become quite as strong as I am, but anything's possible, I suppose. With my training, so long as you learn to tame that beast inside of you, you'll go far.

One didn't need telepathy to see the boy's spirit sor.

"G-Good. I need to become strong. I have to be."

"Ah, do you have something you want to protect?" When Naruto didn't answer, that sly, paternal smile grew. "Or is it someone?"

Naruto colored right to the roots of his hair.

Whis beamed. "I see. Ah, young love~! Well, that would explain it. Ah, I remember falling in love, such a wonderful emotion..."

"Sh-Shut up...

"But really," Whis pressed, "What do you have that keeps you here? Besides your dream and this crush of yours, that is."

Naruto opened his mouth to say just that...

...and closed it. What did he have indeed? Nothing. No, wait, he did have something.


Ayame was special to him of course, but today was just another example of what the village thought of him. If he really did have this creature-this monster-inside of him, and others were treating him poorly for it, what reason had he to stay? He couldn't protect her as he was now. He could barely even protect himself. Such thoughts might have seemed introspective for one so young, but today, of all days, had proven to be a wake-up call long in coming.

He would become strong. Strong enough to protect everything he held dear. Maybe even her, one of the few that had shown him any real kindness.

And then what? He didn't know.

But with every fiber of his being, he wanted to learn.

"Would you like to come with me, then?" Whis offered his hand. "This is the last time I'll ask."

Naruto's eyes.




Slowly, tentatively, he accepted the proffered palm.


"Very good! Now, if you'd kindly hold onto me, we can get started." Raising his scepter, his newfound mentor muttered a command, its jewel glowing a bright, verdant blue. That was the only warning Naruto received in that instant; then all of space warped around them, the very air coalescing into a great pillar of energy. And into that energy, Whis rocketed upright, his new passenger in tow. The boy yelped!

"Wait wait, what are you doiiiiiiiing...!"

With a single tap of the staff...

...Uzumaki Naruto vanished from the world of shinobi.

He would not return for many years.

A/N: And there we have it! Naruto being mentored by Whis himself! Pairing is up in the air folks, as this story will range far and wide across the cosmos. Naruto will indeed become a god, but he's not going to confine himself to one world, of course!

Who knows what might happen?! Hells, Naruto could end up with one of the few DBZ girls for all we know. If so, I'm leaning towards Videl. The Hinata pairing may be one of my favorites, but I've got Beyond the Shadows for that that, and I feel NarutoxSakura has been done to death as it is.

And yes, Naruto is crushing hard on Ayame. But whether anything comes of it remains to be seen. Shall we go with that?

Or, do we need something new?! Refreshing! Something that'll sink its teeth into you and shake you like a T-Rex! Something that'll make ya laugh, giggle, smile, and saw AAAAAW! You know what I'm talking about, right? That's we're ya'll come in! Enlighten me!


So...in the Immortal Words of Atlas...

...Review, Would You Kindly? And of course, enjoy the preview! YUP, BLATANTLY AMUSING TFS reference here, folks!


Orochimaru gawped, blinking at the hole that that now occupied three fourths of his being.

It couldn't end like this.

He still had so much to say, so much to do, he still had to take Sasuke-kun's body! And yet, yet this attack had pierced through him as though his new body were made of clay. He couldn't find the strength to spit out a new body, couldn't become a snake and slither away into the shadows. He found himself paralyzed, petrified by the young man's stare, those gleaming, golden eyes staring down at him like an angry god's. A hand took hold of his prone body and tossed him into the ground, soil bursting beneath his flesh.

So dark. He couldn't see anything. Anything at all.

By the time he finally righted himself, he had no idea where he was. Exasperated he crawled into a standing position, gasping:

"Graaaaaaaaaaaah, what the hell is happening right now?! WHERE THE FUCK AM I?!"

Wait? What was that noise?

And yet now he could see something, a bright radiance overshadowing all else, banishing the darkness to the corners of his vision...

"Hold on, now I see a light...

"Walk towards it." the blond deity opened his hands, still smoking from the explosive blast. A menacing sphere snarled in those palm, keening wildly. And then, he tossed it.


Orochimaru balked as the white light seared itself into his eyes.

"What the heeeeeeeeeeelll...

The last thing the sinister sannin saw was the spiraling ball of doom hurtling towards his face.

R&R~! =D