Title: But You Felt Enough
Spoilers: December Solstice
Summary: They had wanted uncomplicated. They had wanted easy. Things couldn't have been more complicated, more hard, than they were now.
A/N: This takes place before Rafael Barba's grandmother passes away. It's more of an extended scene kind of fic than anything. Enjoy! Let me know what you think.
Chapter 1: You Can See It with the Lights Off
Olivia's obvious turmoil ebbed through her voice as she plead with him to tell her what she desperately needed to hear. That Johnny Drake couldn't touch the life that she had built with her son. That for once, she was going to get the happy ending.
His hand on her arm had been comforting; calming her like nothing else could. She clung to the child in her arms. Exhaustion plagued her. "Barba..." she barely breathed.
He scooted closer, against his better judgement. He moved his hand to brush hair from her face to tuck behind her ear. He then let his fingertips brush across her cheek. He leaned in slowly, brushing his mouth over where his fingers had just been. His arms went around the pair of them, pulling them as close as he dared. This hadn't been the first time he'd kissed her, but this had been the first time that Noah had been present.
She leaned heavily into him. They had wanted uncomplicated. They had wanted easy. Things couldn't have been more complicated, more hard, than they were now. She wanted to get her life with Noah underway, stay in control, but Rafael Barba's presence continued to haunt her desire to focus on her child. He felt like the missing piece of her very complex puzzle.
And yet, she had no idea how he felt about her. It was obvious he cared about her. They were colleagues first, and then became friends. His very existence rattled her to her very core.
He had to shift his body as Olivia settled against his shoulder. He watched as Noah lay against his mother's chest, but his tiny hand reached out to grab him by one of his suspenders. He closed his eyes. "Think you can sleep if I stay?"
She nodded, barely making a noise as she shifted so she could curl into his side. Her lips parted. "He's not going down anytime soon."
He nodded. "It's okay. Pretty sure I can manage him. Just rest..." He let his hand shift from her back to her hair where he gently carded his fingers through it in an attempt to calm her down so that she could get some much needed, and much desired, sleep.
She let out a soft sigh. His reassurance had been enough to put her at ease, but his touch relaxed her in ways that even she had to admit no one else had come close to. Not even Elliot.
Noah shifted his head so that he could look up at the man that was holding his Mom close. He watched with wide-eyed wonderment as he held on tightly to the strap at the man's chest. His little mouth turned up into a grin.
It was contagious as Rafael looked down, smiling back at him. He then laid his larger hand over the baby's smaller one and patted it gently. "Not going to let anything get in the way of your life, Noah. You got a Mommy that loves you. We'll make sure any fool can see that."
She couldn't help but smile as she heard him talking softly to her son. He no doubt thought she was asleep, and she wasn't about to give herself away. However, sleep tugged at her, urging her to give into it. She let his voice lull her. The last thing she remembered was Noah scooting closer to Rafael as they had their own private conversation.
Olivia woke to a dark, quiet room. It seemed that three of them had fallen asleep together after all. She lifted her head, searching for Noah. She found him with his head tucked into the crook of Rafael's neck; both were softly snoring.
She slipped from his embrace, hoping not to wake either of them, but his hand slid into hers as she stood. She squeezed it gently before turning to explain, "I have to pee." She bent, catching his mouth in a tender kiss before pulling away and doing just what she'd said she had to do.
Rafael then carefully stood, holding Noah against him as he carried the boy to his bed in the other room. He tucked him in; complete with a kiss to his forehead.
He righted himself, feeling her eyes on him. He turned slowly to meet her eyes. His feet carried him quietly toward her as he pulled the door closed almost all the way. "You hungry? We could order in. My treat." He slipped an arm around her back, hoping to guide her back toward the living area. He squeezed her hip gently with his fingers. "Anything you want. I'm not picky."