The Ol' Switcheroo

Hermione Granger Weasley was at the end of her tether. Life since the war had been frustrating and disappointing, and lately it had started getting worse.

Hermione and Ron's children were now all at Hogwarts. The nest was empty. She had forgone her career in magical research and spell development, in order to raise a family, and also because, since she was muggle-born, no-one in the wizarding world's halls of power would take her seriously.

Meanwhile, George had moved to Australia, and sold his share of WWW (Britain) to Ron – and Ron had then proceeded to run the business into the ground. Faced with mounting debts and diminishing income, Ron had started to drink heavily, and to take out his frustrations and anger on Hermione.

Hermione wanted to start up her career again, but Ron simply wasn't having it. He wanted her to be a good little housewitch, and cater to his (many) needs. In short, he wanted a second mum. But as usual, he had underestimated Hermione's inventiveness, and had quite forgotten her capacity for a vicious streak.

One evening, after serving Ron an exceptional meal, accompanied by a few too many glasses of wine, Hermione told him: "Hey, Ron! I've got a great idea. Something that'll bring a little spice back into our sex life."

"Hmm?" Ron grinned drunkenly.

"Yes! We'll both take a polyjuice potion, with a hair from each other! That way, we can experience what each other's sexual feelings are like."

Ron was getting a rise from the very idea, and was just drunk enough not to question its wisdom. "You're on!" he said.

It just so happened that Hermione had already brewed the potion. She took hair samples from them both; put them into two separate vials; handed hers to Ron, and took his vial in hand. "Bottoms up!" she said with a sweet smile.

Ron leered. "Bottoms up!" he agreed, and they both drank.

Needless to say, the wine and the potion were not a great mix, so Ron felt a bit queasy as both he and Hermione went through the change into each other. But after his stomach settled, he couldn't help but notice that he now had wonderful big boobies, and started to play with them. Hermione, now in Ron's body, took the distracted Ron's hand and led him/her to the bedroom, where she used her wand to disrobe them both.

Once in bed, Hermione used some loving foreplay, and showed considerably more patience and tenderness than the real Ron ever did. Ron was very turned on, and eagerly let Hermione-in-Ron's-body climb atop and mount him. After a bout of vigorous love-making, Hermione rested her now much larger body on top of Ron-in-Hermione's-body, and said: "Well, that was fun! And I have a surprise for you."

"Hmm?" Ron inquired.

"You see, I've been doing some potions research, and discovered a way to make the polyjuice change permanent."

"Hmm?" Ron wondered, not fully grasping the implications.

"Yes, you see, I've decided that we should change places. For good. As a pureblood, I'll get the respect and favoritism that you've always just squandered, and finally get a worthwhile position in research and spell creation. And you can stay home and eat to your heart's content!"

"But..." Ron said, with mixed feelings.

"Oh, don't worry, you won't remember." She/he took her/his wand, and waved it at Ron, saying, "Obliviate! Confundus! Imperio! You are Hermione Granger. You have always been Hermione Granger. You are a housewife, who loves to cook, clean and look after your husband. Me – Ron Weasley."

"Yes … Okay … "

"Now I'm hungry."

Oh, Honestly, Ron!" he/she slurred, eyes fluttering shut, and started snoring.