A/N: Still don't own Chuck or make any $ from it
Master ran into Casey as he was leaving the hospital.
"How did it go at the site John?"
"Very well sir?"
"I talked to Sarah," Master said.
"How is she doing?"
"Physically she is fine. Mentally is another matter," Master said as he motioned to the room.
"She will mend. She is tough," Casey said.
"You know John I think she could use her partner in there."
"On my way sir," Casey said as he headed for the room.
Sarah had one broken arm, 2 broken fingers, 1 broken rib, and various assorted stitches, but could not keep the smile off her face as she watched her sleeping nerd in the chair next to her hospital bed. His legs were scrunched up underneath his on the chair, and he almost looked like he had tied his body into a knot.
She was thinking about just how much they had been through in the last couple of weeks and she couldn't help feel but feel responsible for what happened to him. Why are relationships so hard? Why am I so afraid? I love him so much if something ever happened to him it would kill me. Why can't I trust myself? Why am I so fucked up?
"That boy could sleep through a nuclear explosion," Casey said as he walked in carrying a cup of coffee.
"Yes he could," Sarah said chuckling.
"How are you doing Walker," Casey asked.
"All things being equal not too bad."
Casey went up behind Chuck and flicked his ear, causing him to reach for his ear and slip out of his chair.
"What?" Chuck said as he cleared the cobwebs out of his eyes.
"Casey!" Sarah admonished him.
"God dump some hormones," Casey said.
"I need to talk to Walker alone Bartowski," Casey said.
"Chuck its ok why don't you go home and get some rest," Sarah said.
"No I'm ok. I'll just take a walk…,"
"Chuck you are dead on your feet. I will be fine," Sarah smiled at him.
"Ok Ill be back in a couple hours," Chuck said as he leaned down to kiss her.
"Take a shower."
"Humph," Chuck grunted as he left.
Casey could see Sarah was holing back, and he was pretty sure he knew what it was.
"So how are you really doing," Casey said as he sat down.
"I'm just a little unsure of what I'm supposed to do," Sarah confessed.
"All of this started because of me! If not for me Chuck never would have been taken. Now I don't know what to do," Sarah said with her voice breaking.
"Of for Christ sake Walker it ain't that hard," Casey said.
"What do you mean?"
"You have 2 options because they will not let Chuck go, so you either stay or you leave."
"I'm not leaving him Casey," Sarah said defensively.
"Then what's your problem," Casey replied.
"I don't know how to handle all of this if something like this happens again," Sarah said her voice rising.
"Walker will you get your balls out of your purse and be who you are supposed to be," Casey replied matching her volume.
"Oh what am I supposed to be Casey," Sarah said sarcastically.
"You are supposed to be with him!"
"I am with him Casey. Master approved it.."
"That's not what I'm talking about Walker."
"Then why are you talking about," Sarah shouted.
"You are afraid of your past."
"Walker you are afraid of you past. You are afraid that you are a damaged person and that you are too screwed up to ever get past it," Casey replied.
"Well you would understand," she said exasperated and immediately felt horrible for it.
"I'm sorry Casey...I didn't mean..."
"If you want to ask me something Walker, just ask it, " Casey said as he addressed the proverbial elephant in the room.
"Yes. I...uh...I'm so sorry Casey. I can't imagine what you went through," Sarah said as she fidgeted in her bed.
"It wasn't fun," Casey acknowledged while sipping his coffee.
"I guess...I ...how did you get over it... Your family..I mean it's terrible," Sarah stuttered as tears came to her eyes.
"It wasn't easy, and I will never be over it. It took me a long time to even begin to stop hating myself."
"Hating yourself? Why did you hate yourself? You didn't do anything wrong," Sarah asked.
"I hated everything Walker. I hated what those men did to my family and to me. I hated whatever higher power there was for letting it happen. I hated myself for...," he broke as he choked up.
"I hated myself for surviving."
"Casey," Sarah began.
"No I know Walker. Survivors guilt and all of that, but it's not that I didn't know why I was still alive, I didn't want to be alive."
Sarah began to cry silently as she saw the big mans shouldered sag at the memory and the pain he felt. She would not realize until later how much he shared with her, and that he cared about her so much to go back into such a terrible memory in order to help her find solace.
"So one day after I had gotten into another screaming match with my grandparents, I decided to end it all. I took my grandfathers hunting rifle an went out to this old abandoned drive in theater near the farm."
"Is that when General Master saved you?"
Suddenly Casey started to chuckle.
"Casey are you alright," Sarah asked with concern.
"Yeah I'm fine Walker," he laughed as he wiped the tears from his eyes.
"Master didn't save me. He gave me an opportunity and avenue to complete my purpose, but he didn't save me. I found my purpose in that drive in that day."
"I don't understand."
"When my family was in Afghanistan, we were on our way to Kabul, but got hit with a sand storm, and my father set out camp in a dry river bed. There was nothing growing anywhere, we were in the middle of the desert so there was no water. After the storm was over my sister and I went out to explore," she said as he took a drink of his coffee.
"She came over a little ridge and in the middle of this huge desert, there was a rose bush. I have no idea how it got there, or why it was growing, but it was. The rose bush was flowering white roses, beautiful white roses that my sister and I made into a bouquet for my mother."
Sarah silently dabbed her eyes as he continued.
"I will always remember my mothers ace when we brought those back for her. She was so happy and so surprised. My sister and my mother both wore a rose in their hair for the rest of the day. It was so simple, but we were so happy. It was the last happy memory I have of my family, the next day the Russians came."
"I'm so sorry Casey," Sarah sobbed.
Casey swallowed hard to control his tears, then continued.
"Anyway when I was about ready to end it in that theater, I walked around to make sure it was abandoned. When I rounded the last corner I saw it."
"I saw a white rose bush. It was in the middle of nowhere, just like in the desert. I knew then that I couldn't end it this way. They...they...ah..they wouldn't want me to end it this way," he said his voice thick with emotion.
"It was not until that moment I truly understood what sacrifice was about. I felt so selfish for not realizing what they did for me. My mother died saving my life, and all I cared about up to that point was easing my pain. It was then that I realized my purpose in this life."
"What was it," Sarah asked softly.
"I knew that I couldn't bring my family back, but I could honor their memory by dedicating my life so that the innocent would not have to experience what I did. If I ever got the opportunity to help those who could not help themselves then I would do it."
"A few days later Master came to check up on me and I decided to join the Marines. So in a way it all fit, I realized that I was doing what I was supposed to do," he continued.
"But Casey you already have so much, why did you think you were supposed to become a soldier," Sarah asked.
"Not just a soldier, anyone can call themselves a soldier, those men who killed my family called themselves soldiers. True soldiers have honor and true soldiers are people for others, they are not for themselves. When I saw that white rose it I thought of my sister and my mother. That is why I do what I do, I will never let anyone experience the pain that I did if I can stop it."
"I don't think I would be able to come back from something like that. It scares me to death if something I did is going to get him killed," Sarah said as she wiped the ever-present tears from her eyes.
Casey let her cry for a minute as she finally got to the heart of the matter. He knew that she was scared and that she was hurting, but he knew he could help.
"Sarah I can't tell you want to do, I only can give you my advice if you would like to hear it," he said.
"Yes please," Sarah cried.
"A wise man once said to me that a man becomes the person he is today because of his past, or in spite of his past. Your past is part of you, but it doesn't have to define you. It is not easy and it takes a strong character and people who care about you, which you have, and you can overcome it."
"Thank you Casey. That means a lot to me, "Sarah said as she smiled at his statement.
"When I first started with you and Bartowski, I figured that this would be a disaster. You and I were at odds, and the moron was...well...the moron."
"But I was not anticipating what happened next," Casey said.
"What was that," Sarah asked.
"Despite all of our collective baggage, you and I developed a respect for each other which has grown into a friendship. Truth be told, I don't have many friends Sarah, and I consider you one of my best."
Sarah couldn't speak, but she certainly could cry. She had never expected Casey to open up to her like this, let alone tell her she was one of his best friends.
"Casey I don't know what to say...I feel the same ..and..,"
"That's fine Sarah let's not get all BFF on me here," he said.
"Ok well thank you and I want you to know I feel the same," Sarah said as she dabbed more tears.
"Now as for you and the moron," Casey began.
"I knew you were a good agent before I met you, but you were no where near to what you are now."
"What do you mean," she asked.
"You two are better together, a blind man could see it. It's probably for the best as nobody else could stand either of you," Casey smirked.
"Seriously though he is a good man Walker and you deserve him."
"Thank you Casey," Sarah replied.
"And he deserves you," Casey said as he got up to leave.
Sarah was stunned as she saw him get up and move towards the door.
"Now listen don't get all...,"
Was as far as he got before his new blonde bff ensnared him in her arms.
"The things I do for my country," he muttered.
Two months later Sarah was out of her casts and back to full operation status. During her recuperation she was charged with helping Chuck sift through Intel reports and establishing their new cover identities. 6 months later, the team had managed to be so effective in its limited use that Master had done the unthinkable and given them a well-deserved vacation.
Casey was going back east to re-qualify at sniper school, while Chuck and Sarah were going to Florida.
"Sarah you will love it. They call it the happiest place on earth," Chuck said as the boarded the plane.
" I'm not sure what all the hype is about, it's just a theme park," Sarah said as she sat down next to him.
She didn't want to tell Chuck before, but her father had taken her there when she was younger, and her experience was anything but happy. her father got caught sneaking in and she spent the day just sitting on different benches and watching happy families and children enjoy their time.
"Well for someone who has not been there I would suggest you hold judgment until you are magicized," he said.
"Sure," she chuckled at him.
"I need to go talk to the flight attendant," Sarah said as she got up.
"Sarah do we have to..," he said, but she was gone.
He loved the woman, but felt she was taking security a little too seriously at the moment. He watched her flash a badge to the flight attendant and explain that she needed to keep the area around them clear. The government had already booked all of the other seats in their immediate area, as per her request, so now it almost felt to chuck like overkill.
"Everything go ok," Chuck said as she came back and say with him.
"Fine. Just explaining our situation," Sarah said as she slipped her gun from her carrying to her waistband.
"Seriously? We are going to the happiest place on earth" Chuck exclaimed as he saw the gun.
"And we are coming back from it as well," Sarah said.
"Do me a favor just don't squeeze off any into a big duck or big mouse. They are supposed to be there," he laughed.
"As long as they keep their assorted paws and flippers off of you they have nothing to fear," Sarah replied with a sly smile.
"It's a long ride to Florida, why don't you tray to get some sleep," Sarah said before take off.
"Are you kidding? I can't sleep on a plane!"
"Sure," Sarah said sarcastically as she asked the flight attendant for a pillow.
After the plane was in the air the hum of the engines and the realization that he was finally going on vacation with Sarah, Chuck found himself very tired and dropped off to sleep. His head was on the very same pillow Sarah got from the flight attendant when the plane hit a little warmer air.
"What was that," Chuck said as he was startled awake by the turbulence.
"Nothing just a little bump," Sarah said as she rubbed his hair.
"Yeah well I guess..Sarah! Are you kidding me," he said as he held up his wrist that was hand cuffed to hers.
"I'm not taking any chances," she deadpanned.
"What am I going to do with you," he asked in mock seriousness.
"Well I hope you think of something, because you are stuck with me now," she said as she patted his hand and showed off a sizable diamond ring.
"Well I suppose there are worse positions I could be in, "he said smiling.
"Indeed," she replied as she kissed him.
The hot Florida sun beet down and broiled the unfortunate individuals who were waiting in the endless lines. The young blonde haired girl sat alone on the bench surrounded by happy families enjoying their vacations. She seemed oddly out of place by herself, while all around her there was a flurry of activity.
She was with her father earlier, but when they got to the entrance of the park, she went through, but he got stuck behind. She was really beginning to feel the heat, when suddenly a large shadow engulfed her from behind. She looked up to see a large hand push a bottle of water toward her and a floppy hat be put on her head.
"What's this," she said as she looked at the hat.
"Put it on the sun is too strong down here, and drink the water! No watering the plants this time," the large man said.
"You know I told your father that we had to get here early, but he drags his feet..."
Suddenly the man's cell phone buzzed.
"Well nice of you to join us," Casey said as he answered the phone.
"Yeah we are near the castle. The princess lunch is at 11:30 so you need to move it so she can get a seat. Alright see you then," Casey said as he hung up.
"Yeah c'mon we need to mobilize," Casey said as he grabbed her hand and they walked toward the castle.
"Where are we going," the little girl asked.
"Your mom and dad are waiting for us by the castle so you can do the princess thing."
"Oh ok. Then what are we doing after that," she asked.
"I guess we will do the happily ever after thing," Casey said as he waved to a waiting Sarah and Chuck.