A/N: This was my RentFic101 Secret Santa fic, kindly organized by the amazing and fantastic Sandy. I happened to get Kait, and this was my present to her. It's a summer fic, because I don't know about the rest of you, but I hate the cold. So I decided it'd be a nice break to make it summer again. So yes. This here is a Secret Santa fic written for good ol' Ms. Sudol. And I hope everyone else has/had a wonderful holiday/vacation/day/anything else. And I say hell, even if you don't celebrate Christmas, celebrate something! Because celebrating is fun. ::nod::

Counter-productivity

It was hot. Not just hot, unbearably hot. The kind of hot that makes you stick to everything you touch and even softens the tar on the roads. To add to this incredible heat, it was two o'clock in the afternoon. The sun was directly overhead, eliminating all shadows that might even hold the illusion of shade. Days like these were despised by almost everyone, almost everywhere. But not any singular person enjoyed or even could tolerate days like these in the midst of New York City. Mark Cohen and Roger Davis were absolutely no exception to this rule. The heat makes everyone irritable, and Mark and Roger were especially not exempt to this fact. Roger was whiny, and Mark was homicidal.

"Can we at least get ice cream or something?"

"One, no. Two, that would involve moving. Three, we have no money. And four, no." Mark spoke blankly and without moving from his position sprawled on a metal chair with three second rate fans posed perfectly in his direction.

"You're being counter-productive."

"I'm being counter-productive? How could I possibly be counter-productive? I'm sitting! And I'm not allowing you to get yourself into trouble. You should be thanking me! I am anything but counter-productive."

"You're not listening to my ideas, which are good. In this apathetic fashion, you are disallowing me to help us 'beat the heat,' if you will, and therefore you are being completely and totally counter-productive."

"Why can't you talk like that when we're having a serious discussion?"

"Because then I wouldn't be letting you win, and you'd get all pouty."

"I would not!"

"Yes you would. But that's not the point. Can we please go to the movies or something, at least?"

"No money."

"Shit."

"Yeah."

"Well then can I at least have one of your fans? I only have two."

"No! I won this third one fair and square. It's not my fault you suck at Rock Paper Scissors."

"You cheated."

"Did not."

"You're so immature."

"You're the one who accused me of cheating just because you lost."

"Fuck you."

"It's too hot."

Roger jumped from his chair. He grinned wickedly.

"Oh no. Oh, no. What did I say?" Mark was absolutely terrified. He hated when Roger got that look on his face. Okay, so he didn't hate it. It gave him a certain seductive quality. But still, he was frightened of what could possibly be running through Roger's mind.

Roger remained silent, grabbing Mark's hand and tugging firmly. Mark resisted, adverse to losing the precarious aim his fans had taken. Roger was strong, though, and determined. Mark had no chance. Before he knew it, he was being led to the bathroom. He opened his mouth to question, and in turn most likely protest the situation, but Roger pressed a hand over his mouth.

"Just shut up and give me a chance."

Mark watched Roger start the shower and test the temperature. He placed the back of his wet hand on Mark's forehead, and Mark closed his eyes, relieved to feel the chilly water drip down his temple. Roger slowly took the hand off of Mark's mouth.

"Good idea, no?"

Mark couldn't help but smile. "Good idea."

With that approval, Roger wasted no time in removing his shirt and helping Mark remove his own. They both stripped fully before stepping under the cold water and shivering at the sharp sting of beautiful relief.

Roger smiled again, sweetly this time. "Now's your chance to make up for your earlier counter-productive status."

Mark laughed. "Don't worry. When it comes to cold showers and nudity, I am the opposite of counter-productive."