The Insanity Twins Strike Again
Loki was still living with Rose and Emily two weeks later, and they were building a treehouse in the backyard when a beam of rainbow light hit the three of them, destroying the treehouse and sending them to Asgard.
They landed in Heimdall's Observatory, and Emily went straight up to him and yelled, "What was that for!? You destroyed our new treehouse!"
Loki got the immense pleasure of seeing Heimdall look actually confused. He shook it off pretty quickly, though, and said, "My apologies."
"Mmph," Emily said, and noticed a guard coming over to them. He was carrying a muzzle and shackles, and Emily asked, "What are those for?"
"They are to restrain Loki," the guard said.
Emily and Rose promptly attacked him and grabbed the muzzle and shackles, then threw them over the side of the Bifrost. They disappeared into the Void, and Rose said, "Loki doesn't need to be restrained, and anyone who tries to do so will face the wrath of the Insanity Twins. Now why are we here?"
"Loki has been summoned by the Allfather," the guard said. "May I have my sword back now?"
Rose looked at the sword, then shrugged and handed it back. "It's kind of heavy anyways," she said. "If you do anything to Loki, though, I'll take it back and you'll be missing a very important body part- if you get my drift."
The guard gulped and said, "Understood….. Follow me….."
"Why don't we just meet you there?" Loki suggested. "Rose and Emily don't know anything about horseback riding; I'll just teleport them to the palace, and you can go get drunk or something."
"I have orders to-" the guard started, but Loki just grabbed Rose and Emily and teleported to the palace gates.
The guards there went on alert, and Loki rolled his eyes. "Weren't we SUPPOSED to come here?" he asked them.
"What did you do with Bryn?" one of them barked.
"He's fine; I didn't feel like teleporting him as well, so he'll have to make his own way back," Loki said, shrugging. "He said I had to meet with the Allfather, though, and I'm guessing I shouldn't keep the old geezer waiting."
The guards reluctantly let Loki and the girls in, and Loki led Rose and Emily to the throne room. "This place is really big," Rose commented.
"Yeah, but it's so gaudy," Emily replied. "I mean, seriously. There's gold and stuff absolutely EVERYWHERE; haven't these people ever heard of restraint?"
"No, and they probably never will," Loki said. "Sad, really."
They reached the throne room a few minutes later, and the one of the guards there asked, "Where is your escort?"
"He got lost," Rose said. "I've been informed the old geezer in there doesn't like waiting; maybe you should let us in. We promise not to traumatize too many people- right Loki?"
"Yes," Loki said.
The guards sighed and let them in, and they walked over to the dais, where Odin and Frigga were waiting. Odin leveled a one-eyed glare at them, and asked, "Loki, what have you done with the guards and why are you not restrained?"
"The guards all got lost, and the one you sent to the Bifrost was a total klutz; he dropped the restraints off the edge of the Bifrost and they fell into the Void," Loki said. "And I teleported Rose and Emily here while he was distracted. You might want to have a word with him….."
Odin growled and asked, "Would you care to explain why you escaped and why Thor is now refusing to come home?"
"Thor's got permanent pink puppy ears, and I'm guessing he's too embarrassed to come home," Rose chirped cheerfully. "And Loki escaped because he didn't want to be tied to a rock with snake venom dripping on him for the rest of his life."
Frigga blinked. "Loki, where did you get that idea?" she asked. "We were going to send you back to the Avengers to help repair the damage you did to their city."
"The last time I got punished was considerably more severe, so I figured that this time would be worse," Loki said, shrugging. "The AllGeezer does not have a track record of lenient punishments."
"WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME!?" Odin bellowed.
"Well, you're a horrible parent, so we thought up a new name for you," Emily said. "Loki said that people call you the Allfather, so Rose suggested that since you're so old, we should call you the AllGeezer."
Odin was steaming, and Frigga put a hand on his arm before asking, "Who are you two, exactly?"
"I'm Rose, that's Emily, and with Loki, we're the Insanity Triplets!" Rose said happily. "It used to be the Insanity Twins, but since there's three of us now, we changed it to the Insanity Triplets."
"I… see…." Frigga said. "You said something about Thor having puppy ears?"
"Yeah, they're pink," Emily said. "He comes by once a week to try to convince Loki to get rid of them. He should be grateful the hot pink ringlets weren't permanent too, but nooo, he just has to have the puppy ears off too."
"Warriors are not supposed to have puppy ears," Odin growled.
"Dude, that's totally stereotypical," Rose said. "Besides, Loki's gone from wanting to brutally murder Thor to giving him puppy ears; I'd say that's improvement."
"And he's been doing much better now that we got him his own library card," Emily added. "If you make Loki stay here, he'll be unhappy and probably go back to wanting to kill Thor. He's much happier with us. We're running a Funny Farm!"
Frigga and Odin's blank looks had Loki bursting out laughing. Odin glared at him and asked, "What is so amusing?"
"The look on your face," Loki snickered. When he calmed down, he asked, "By the way, is there a way to turn me into a mortal but allow me to keep my magic?"
"Possibly," Frigga said. "Why do you ask?"
"Because I like Rose and Emily, and I don't particularly want to live for thousands of years if it means they'll be gone at some point," Loki said. "And in human terms, I'm about their age, so if I was mortal, I wouldn't have to outlive them."
Odin and Frigga both looked at him in surprise. "You would give up your immortality for these two?" Odin asked.
"Yes," Loki said. "They're fun, they accept me for who I am, they've taught me a lot, and I don't want to watch them grow old and die while I stay the same."
Rose and Emily both hugged him happily, and he hugged back, adding, "And they give me hugs."
"You realize if we do this, you will be unable to return without Thor taking you?" Frigga asked.
"Yes, but you can visit us, right Mother?" Loki asked.
Frigga smiled. "Yes, I can visit," she said. "So you want us to strip you of your immortality but leave your magic intact?"
"Yes please," Loki said.
"Very well," Odin said. "The girls will need to stand aside."
Rose and Emily let go of Loki and stood off to the side. Odin lifted Gungnir, and pointed it at Loki. "Loki Odinson, from now on, you will live life as a mortal, but you will be allowed to keep your magical skills," Odin intoned, and a burst of blue light engulfed Loki. When it faded, he didn't look any different, but Odin said, "That should do it."
Loki lifted a hand, and an illusion of a butterfly appeared and fluttered around before vanishing. "Thank you, Allfather," Loki said. "May we go?"
"Very well," Odin said.
"I will walk with you," Frigga said, standing and coming down to them. They walked out of the throne room together, and to the palace gates. When they reached the gates, Frigga said, "I will miss you, Loki."
"I'll miss you too, Mother, but you can visit anytime," Loki said.
Frigga smiled and hugged him, and he hugged her back. When they broke apart, Frigga said to Rose and Emily, "Take care of my son, please."
"We will!" Rose and Emily chirped cheerfully. Loki smiled and took them both by the hand, then teleported back to the Bifrost. "Heimdall, we'd like to go home now," Loki said.
Heimdall simply nodded and sent them back to their house, where they spent the rest of the day watching movies.
This was a request from thephoenixandthedragon4ever, so I hope she and all of you enjoy the sequel to Rehabilitation. And you should go read her story The World is an Inferno.