It was a cold damp October day at Hogwarts. Headmaster Dumbledore was in his office doing paper work and having fun with his current boyfriend/ brother Aberforth Dumbledore.
"Ooo Abe baby, your brother here has got some important business to do." Dumbledore said sincerely, as he ignored Aberforths pleading face.
Harry was talking to his Slytherin friends about a weird story that kept popping up in both the muggle and wizard news
"It's weird, in the muggle thier has been reports on a mysterious illness going around, and everyone's getting attacked." Harry said.
"Those muggles, there nothing short of a basket case, father says that muggles are almost as bad as the Weasley family." Draco Malfoy said as he tried to end the subject.
"Maybe, but it's not only the muggle world, but there have been reports of wizards getting this illness to." Harry argued.
"I'll believe it when I see it." Draco said as he changed the subject to quidditch.
"Ahh Minerva, you wish to see me?" Dumbledore asked charmingly.
"Yes Albis not me, but Cornelius Fudge, he's here, and he said it's about this mysterious illness." Minerva said fearfully.
"Oh this illness is a bullshit story, that a couple of assholes cooked up." Dumbledore tried to reassure Minerva. "I'll go have a word with him!" Dumbledore added with a wink, as he put his arm around Mcgnagall to walk her out of his office.
"Ahh Cornelius my boy, how you doing!" Dumbledore smirked, as he greeted the minister of magic with a handshake, and an attempted kiss on the mouth, which Fudge brushed off forcefully.
"Albus these are bad, very bad indeed." Fudge said sadly.
" How so?" Dumbledore asked as he randomly scratched his crotch and was hardly paying attention, as he frantically searched for a bottle of fire whiskey.
"Please don't tell me that a very smart man like yourself believes in this conspiracy theory that the dead are coming back and eating the living!" Dumbledore sneered in good humor.
"Well Albus this disease that's no longer a rumor is causing devastation, that Voldemort would only dream of causing.
"Ooo so you heard of that story to?" Dumbledore asked "Pretty stupid!" Dumbledore added as he found a bottle of fire whiskey and poured some into two glasses.
"Albus the rumor of this disease is true, that's the reason why I am here!" Fudge thundered.
"Tell me one damn legitimate reason to believe you!" Dumbledore said as quickly got on the offensive.
"Albus I'll give you one, since you insist on a being a stubborn dumb ass mule." Fudge said as he swallowed hard, and began again.
"I saw it first hand headmaster, it was crazy shit, shite that will haunt me for whatever time we have left on this earth" Fudge spat.
"Go on." Dumbledore said smugly.
"I saw it, I saw a ministry official get eaten by a man, but the thing was this man was not living, he was dead!" Fudge cracked. "It's true Albus the disease kills you and later you come back and kill everything you can find!" Fudge thundered once more.
"Oh Fudge I think Voldemort has you up at night, or you're on drugs Cornelius my boy." Dumbledore said pleasantly as Fudge scolded at him. "Fudge you need some sleep, come on you can strip down now and we can take a nice nap right now eh!" Dumbledore said encouragingly.
"Dumbledore you should be taking this seriously there are countless people who depend on you !" Fudge spat.
"Like who!" Dumbledore cracked.
"Everyone at this school!" Fudge now screamed.
"Since you're being such a defiant asshole, I'll take the appropriate measures and evacuate everyone from this school!" Fudge declared.
"Now you've taken it too far!" Dumbledore wheezed as he whipped out his wand. Fudge reached for his wand, but he was too late. "Avada Kedavra!" Dumbledore cat scanned on top his lungs. Dumbledore watched with vengeance as a lifeless Fudge fell over in a heap.