BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER

"Now in Syndication"

CAST LIST

BUFFY SUMMERS                                                                Sarah Michelle Gellar

XANDER HARRIS                                                                 Nicholas Brendon

RUPERT GILES                                                                      Anthony Stewart Head

ANYA/ANYANKA                                                                Emma Caulfield

TARA MACLAY                                                                    Amber Benson

WILLOW ROSENBERG                                                        Alyson Hannigan

DAWN SUMMERS                                                                Michelle Trachtenberg

SPIKE                                                                                     James Marsters

JONATHAN LEVINSON                                                      Danny Strong

ANDREW WELLS                                                                 Thomas Lenk

FAITH                                                                                     Eliza Dushku

KENNEDY                                                                             Iyari Limon

RONA                                                                                     Indigo

MOLLY                                                                                  Clara Bryant

CHLOE                                                                                   Lalaine

VI                                                                                            Felicia Day

VAMP

REPORTER 1 

REPORTER 2 

PHOTOGRAPHER    

MASSEUSE   

BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER

"Now in Syndication"

SET LIST

INTERIORS

BUFFY'S HOUSE

      LIVING ROOM

      KITCHEN

BUFFY'S HOUSE (WISHVERSE)

      MASTER BEDROOM

      MASTER BATHROOM

      KITCHEN

      DINING ROOM

ANYA'S OFFICE

GILES' OFFICE

      RECEPTION AREA

SUNNYDALE CONSTRUCTION

SPA

      SALON

EXTERIORS

BUFFY'S HOUSE

      FRONT PORCH

SUNNYDALE CEMETERY

CITY STREETS


BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER

"Now in Syndication"

TEASER

                                GILES (v.o.)

      Previously on Buffy the Vampire Slayer...

PREVIOUSLIES

1    INT.  MAGIC BOX – NIGHT

Willow, Anya, Giles, and Xander are sitting at the table.  Willow points behind Anya, who turns and reads a sign posted, which says: 'No Vengeance in the Magic Box.  This means you, Anya.'  Anya rolls her eyes.

                           ANYA

              Fine.

2    INT.  MAGIC BOX – TRAINING ROOM – DAY

Tara is sitting on the floor, Willow next to her.  The rest of the Scoobies are standing around.  Giles is holding a book.

              GILES

That would be the memory loss.  Tara's last clear memory is...

              TARA

Waiting for Willow at the World's Culture Fair.

              GILES

Exactly.  Everything should return in a few minutes.

     Willow releases a breath and pulls Tara into a huge hug.

                                WILLOW

                   We'll just sit here and wait then.

                                DAWN

                  Everything really is going to be okay.

Tara closes her eyes and everyone stares at her expectantly.  She gasps suddenly and opens her eyes.  They are brimming with tears.  She pushes Willow away.

                           TARA

You... we... the memory spell... and Warren shot me... and you... you... you...

Tara stands up and backs toward the door.  She looks wildly around the room before bolting out the door.

3    INT.  BUFFY'S HOUSE – LIVING ROOM – DAY

     Buffy is sitting on the couch.  Spike is about to exit.

           BUFFY

I get that you've changed, Spike, but I can't just forget what happened because you're different now...

                             SPIKE

I don't want you to forget, Buffy. Never forget. I was... something horrible; disgusting. I may not be any better now, but I'm trying.

     Spike smiles weakly at Buffy.

                             SPIKE

                  That's got to count for something, right?

     Buffy looks at Spike and then away.

                             BUFFY

                  (Quietly) I don't know.

     Spike nods at Buffy and starts for the door.

                             SPIKE

I'll take it. Better than the 'I never want to see you around here again' I was expecting.

     He reaches for the door and pauses, his hand on the knob.

                        SPIKE

              But you will let me know? If you need anything?

Buffy nods and smiles.  Spike walks out the door, closing it behind him.  Buffy sits alone for a few minutes, and the camera zooms in on her.  She takes a watery breath.

                        BUFFY

           (Whispering) I need you.

4    EXT.  CITY STREETS – NIGHT

                                JONATHAN

Dude, I know you're gay.  Quit trying to pretend you're not.

              ANDREW

I am not gay!

              JONATHAN

                  Whatever.


ACT ONE

5    EXT.  SUNNYDALE CEMETARY – NIGHT

Spike and Buffy are walking through the cemetery, both holding stakes.

                           SPIKE

I thought that you had to wear that sodding security uniform.

              BUFFY

We had a meeting and I convinced them that the uniform was 'hindering my capture ratio'.  I even made a chart and everything.  So I'm in civilian garb now.

              SPIKE

You look fetching.

Buffy smiles at Spike and they continue walking in silence.  Spike looks at Buffy for a minute and starts reaching to take her hand.  Before he can make contact, a vampire jumps in front of them, growling.  Spike jumps in front of Buffy, stake raised.  Buffy shoves Spike out of the way.  He falls onto his back and Buffy has staked the vamp before Spike can even get up.  Spike stands and brushes the dirt off of his clothes.  He is offended and a little hurt.  Buffy starts walking.

                           BUFFY

One down... an infinite number to go.  That's one downfall to this job, they just keep...

Buffy stops and turns back to look at Spike.  He is still standing where he picked himself up off the ground.

                           BUFFY

              Are you coming?

                           SPIKE

              Not really any point to it, is there? 

Buffy is taken aback.

                           BUFFY

              What are you talking about?

                           SPIKE

You can't stand that you might actually have some help, can you?  Then you couldn't be all mightier-than-thou.

              BUFFY

I'm the Slayer, Spike.  The Slayer.

              SPIKE

That tune is getting old, pet.  (A beat)  Why don't you let me know when you'll let me do more than just tag along.

Spike throws his stake down and storms off.  Buffy snorts and laughs to herself.  She is obviously affected by what Spike said but is trying to play it off.

                           BUFFY

              I don't need help.  And I am mightier than him.

Buffy storms off in the opposite direction.

6    INT.  BUFFY'S HOUSE – KITCHEN – NIGHT

Dawn is pouring herself a bowl of cereal.  Buffy opens the door and enters and Dawn looks up at her expectantly.  Dawn's face falls when she sees that Buffy is empty-handed and she grabs a spoon and starts eating.  Buffy takes off her jacket and hangs it on the hook by the door.

                           BUFFY

              Hey.

                           DAWN

              (Brusquely)  Hey.

                           BUFFY

              What's wrong?

                           DAWN

I liked it better when you worked at the DoubleMeat.  At least then you brought home food.

              BUFFY

Only food at my new job is for zombies.

Buffy chuckles.  Dawn screws up her face in disgust and picks up her bowl of cereal.  She exits.  Buffy grabs a bowl from the cupboard and sits down in the chair that Dawn has vacated.  She tries to pour herself a bowl of cereal but the box is empty.  She sighs and gets up to throw it away.  When she turns back around, Anya is sitting in the chair.  Buffy jumps.

                           BUFFY

              You need to wear a bell or something.

Anya laughs a little too enthusiastically.  Buffy looks at her suspiciously.

                           BUFFY

              What's up?

                           ANYA

Nothing whatsoever, friend.  Just thought I'd drop in and see how my friend Buffy is doing.  Like friends do.

                                BUFFY

                  What do you need... money?  A kidney?

Anya laughs again, this time normally, and Buffy flashes a weak smile.

                           ANYA

              How was work today?

Buffy's smile disappears and she shrugs.

                           ANYA

              That bad, huh?

                           BUFFY

(Offhand) I just wish that being the Slayer was a more glamorous job.

Anya becomes Anyanka and she claps her hands excitedly.  Buffy's eyes grow wide and she pales.

                                BUFFY

                  Crap.

END OF TEASER


ACT ONE

7    INT.  BUFFY'S HOUSE (WISHVERSE) – MASTER BEDROOM – DAY

We are zoomed in on Buffy, who is asleep in bed.  An arm is shaking her, trying to wake her. 

                           BUFFY

              (Groggily) Just a few more minutes, Dawnie.

We zoom out to see an immaculately furnished room.  The arm actually belongs to Spike, who is naked (His vital bits are covered with a sheet, people.  Get your brains out of the gutter!).

                           SPIKE

              Not Dawn, Buffy.

Buffy opens her eyes and sees Spike.  She jumps back and falls out of bed.  Buffy quickly stands up and, although we only see her from the shoulders up, it's obvious that she is also naked.  She looks down at herself and blushes.  Scrambling, she pulls a blanket off of the bed and wraps it around herself.

                           BUFFY

              What are you doing here, Spike?

                           SPIKE

What's the matter, Buffy?  My name isn't Spike.  And I live here.

Buffy's eyes narrow and she puts one hand on her hip.  The other hand is holding the blanket up.

                           BUFFY

              If you aren't Spike, who are you?

Spike looks incredibly worried.  He reaches out to grab Buffy but she steps back, evading his grasp.

                           SPIKE

              I'm William... your fiancé?

                           BUFFY

              My what?

There is a knock at the door.  Dawn enters.  She is wearing silk pajamas and is carrying a cell phone, which she hands to Buffy.

                           DAWN

It's Giles.  He wanted to remind you not to be late for your 8 o'clock and to ask you if you wouldn't mind moving your 3 o'clock to 2 o'clock so that it doesn't interfere with your 4 o'clock if it runs a little long.

     Buffy stares at Dawn, dumbstruck.

                                BUFFY

                  Giles wants what?

Dawn rolls her eyes and pushes the phone at Buffy.  Buffy takes the phone gingerly, and stares at it.  Dawn leaves the room and Buffy hesitantly brings the phone to her ear.

                           BUFFY

              Giles?

Buffy listens for a moment before suddenly hanging up the phone and tossing it onto the bed.

                           BUFFY

              I think he's gone crazy.

Buffy glances at Spike/William.

                           BUFFY

              I think you've all gone crazy.

Buffy's eyes get wide and she gulps.

                           BUFFY

Or maybe I've gone crazy!  Like that time when Warren, Jonathan, and Andrew sent that demon after me and he injected that stuff into my arm and I thought that...

     Spike/William is staring at Buffy and she trails off.

                                SPIKE/WILLIAM

                  Andrew, your hairdresser, Andrew?

                                BUFFY

                  My hairdresser?

There is another knock at the door and Dawn enters again, carrying another phone.

                           DAWN

It's Anya.  She says she wants to discuss diversifying your portfolio.  Or something equally confusing.  All I know is, it's about money and she says it's extremely important.

                                SPIKE/WILLIAM

                  Of course she does, greedy little bint.

Spike sighs and rolls over, away from Buffy.  Dawn hands Buffy the phone and exits again.  Buffy looks at the phone.

                                BUFFY

                  Anya.

     Her eyes narrow and she glares at the phone.

                                BUFFY

                  (Menacingly) Anya.

     Buffy turns to Spike/William.

                                BUFFY

                  I'm going to go take this in...

     She spins around, frantically searching for somewhere to go.

                                BUFFY

                  The bathroom.

     Buffy walks up to a closed door and reaches for the knob.

                                SPIKE/WILLIAM (o.s.)

                  That's the closet.

Buffy forces a laugh and turns around.  She spies a door against the opposite wall and opens it.  She sighs in relief when she sees that it's the bathroom and enters it.

DISSOLVE TO:

8    INT.  BUFFY'S HOUSE (WISHVERSE) – MASTER BATHROOM – DAY

Buffy shuts the door and takes a seat in the plush chair next to the vanity.  She looks around for a moment, impressed with the exquisite bathroom.

                           BUFFY

              Nice.

Buffy brings the phone to her ear.

                           BUFFY

              What the hell did you do?

FADE TO:

9    INT.  ANYA'S OFFICE – DAY

Anya is wearing glasses and is sitting in a huge black leather office chair in front of a large wooden desk.  The desk is covered in the latest in office technology.  Anya's secretary, Jonathan, enters and she covers the mouthpiece of the phone.  He sets a steaming cup of coffee down in front of her.  She nods and gestures for him to leave.  He exits, shutting the door behind him.  She uncovers the phone.

                           ANYA

Calm down, Buffy.  The important thing to remember is that this is what you wanted.

Anya takes a sip of coffee as she listens to Buffy.  She suddenly gasps and sets her coffee down roughly.

                                ANYA

Really, Buffy... There's no need to use that kind of language!

FADE TO:

10   INT.  BUFFY'S HOUSE (WISHVERSE) – MASTER BATHROOM – DAY

                                BUFFY

I want you to get here... now... so that we can figure out how to undo this.

Buffy hangs up the phone and sighs.  After a moment, she stands and opens the door.  She looks around her once more before returning to the bedroom.

11   INT.  BUFFY'S HOUSE (WISHVERSE) – MASTER BEDROOM – DAY

Spike is still lying in bed.  He props himself up on one elbow when Buffy enters.

                           SPIKE/WILLIAM

              Get everything figured out?

                           BUFFY

I think so... (To herself) I made a wish that my job was more glamorous and now I'm rich.

              SPIKE/WILLIAM

And famous.

              BUFFY

What?

              SPIKE/WILLIAM

You're a bloody household name, Buffy. 

     Buffy looks shocked and then slowly smiles.

                                BUFFY

                  Maybe this isn't so bad. 

     She tosses the phone onto a nightstand.

                                SPIKE/WILLIAM

Fancy a bit of a 'rough and tumble' before your 8 o'clock?

     Buffy looks appalled and then looks around.

                                BUFFY

                  We're engaged?

                                SPIKE/WILLIAM

                  We're engaged.

                                BUFFY

                  And you live here?

                                SPIKE/WILLIAM

                  I live here.

                                BUFFY

So this sort of 'rough and tumble' thing happens all the time between us?

              SPIKE/WILLIAM

All the time.

     Buffy looks around again and shrugs her shoulders. 

                                BUFFY

                  What the Hell.

     Buffy drops her blanket and walks toward the bed.

BLACKOUT

END OF ACT ONE


ACT TWO

12   GILES' OFFICE – RECEPTION AREA - DAY

Willow is sitting at her desk, gazing at headshots.  She separates them into two piles.  She rolls her eyes at a picture of what looks like a porn star and puts it into the pile on her left.  She eyes the next picture and raises her eyebrows.  It's a headshot of Tara.  She lifts the picture to eye level and scans the room for the matching person.  We see that the room is filled with blonde haired girls.  She finally matches Tara's picture to Tara and sets the picture down on her desk.  Tara is reading a magazine.

                           WILLOW

              Ms. Maclay?

Tara looks up from her magazine at Willow and smiles.  Willow returns the smile and a slight blush appears on her cheeks.

                           WILLOW

              Mr. Giles will see you now.

Tara stands and sets her magazine down on her chair.  We zoom in on the cover and see that it's a 'Time' magazine.  Buffy and Spike are on the cover and the headline is 'Buffy, the Bachelor Slayer'.  We zoom back out.  Tara is standing in front of Willow's desk.

                           TARA

              So I just, um, go right in?

                           WILLOW

(Thinking quickly)  Um, we do.  You and I.  We go in.  I'll go with you.

Willow stands up from her chair and opens the door to Giles' office.  She gestures Tara in and then follows.

13   INT.  GILES' OFFICE – DAY

Giles is sitting at his desk, cleaning his glasses.  He finishes cleaning them, puts them on, and looks up.  He takes in Tara and smiles, then sees Willow behind her and a look of bewilderment crosses his face.

                           GILES

              Willow, what are you...

                           WILLOW

              What am I doing taking so long? 

Willow glances at Giles and shrugs.  Tara turns around and Willow turns her shrug into a gesture to brush her hair back.  She smiles at Tara and Tara turns back to face Giles.

                          


                           WILLOW

I brought Tara Maclay in to audition.  You know, brought her in like I always bring people in.  To help you.  With the selection process.

Willow is gesturing at Tara and then raising her eyebrows.  Giles is very confused.

                                GILES

                  Yes, um, quite. 

     Giles gestures at the chairs in front of him.

                                GILES

                  Won't you sit down, Ms. Maclay?  And Willow?

Tara and Willow both go for the same chair and their hands brush.  Tara smiles at Willow and sits down in the other chair while Willow blushes and giggles.  Willow sits next to Tara and turns to face her.  Tara has her full attention on Giles and so Willow is allowed a full look at Tara.  Willow looks Tara up and down and smiles.

                           GILES

Did you memorize the scene we sent you?

Tara nods and stands.  She clears her throat a few times and smiles nervously at Giles.

                           GILES

              Whenever you're ready...

                           TARA

Um... doesn't someone need to read opposite Buffy?

Willow stands quickly, nearly knocking her chair over.  Tara catches it and sets it upright.  Willow smiles in thanks and turns to Giles.

                                WILLOW

                  I'll do it.  I'll read.  Do you have the copy?

Giles hands Willow a few sheets of paper and Willow turns to face Tara.  Tara smiles, clears her throat again, and begins.

                           TARA

                  So, what did you do all day?

                                WILLOW

Uh, I read a little.  (A beat)  And just thought about a lot of things.  Buffy, I...

                                TARA

My diary?  You read my diary?  (A beat)  That is not okay!  A diary is like a person's most private place!  (A beat)  I... You don't even know what I was writing about!  'Hunk' can mean a lot of things, bad things.  And, and when it says that your eyes are 'penetrating', I meant to write 'bulging'.

              WILLOW

Buffy...

              TARA

And 'A' doesn't even stand for 'Angel' for that matter, it stands for... Achmed, a charming foreign exchange student, so that whole fantasy part has nothing to even do with you at all.

              WILLOW

Your mother moved your diary when she came in to straighten up.  I watched from the closet.  I didn't read it, I swear. 

              TARA

Oh!  (A beat)  Oh...

              WILLOW

I did a lot of thinking today.  I really can't be around you.  (A beat)  Because when I am...

                           TARA

Hey, no big.  Water... over the bridge, under the bridge...

     Willow lowers her script and looks into Tara's eyes.

                                WILLOW

When I am all I can think about is how badly I want to kiss you.

              TARA

...over the dam... 

     Tara shyly returns Willow's gaze.

              TARA

Kiss me?

              WILLOW

I'm older than you and this can't ever... I better go.

              TARA

H-how much older?

              WILLOW

I should go.

     Tara approaches Willow so that they are standing inches apart.

                                TARA

                  Go... you said...

                                GILES

                  Thank you, that's...

Willow and Tara kiss gently.  They both step back and blush, looking at the ground.

FADE TO:

14   INT.  BUFFY'S HOUSE (WISHVERSE) – MASTER BEDROOM – DAY

Spike is still in bed, alone now, and reading another magazine with Buffy's face splayed across the cover. The magazine is "Playboy."

                           SPIKE/WILLIAM

Oh, come on. Those don't even LOOK real. You'd think if they were going to airbrush something, it'd be a bit more... well, hello.

Spike stops talking and stares at the next page. We then see him turn the magazine on its side and unfold a three-page centerfold. Footsteps are heard pounding down the hall, and the door to the bedroom is flung open. Spike quickly shoves the magazine under his pillow and lays back on both of his arms, effecting casual.

                           SPIKE/WILLIAM

Buffy, luv, what are you doing back so soon? You're going to miss your... 

     Spike turns to look and Buffy and rolls his eyes.

                                SPIKE/WILLIAM

                  Bloody Hell.

The camera pulls back to reveal Andrew standing in the doorway, looking frantic.  He is wearing a black turtleneck, sparkling silver pants, and has a holster of sorts around his waist.  A hairdryer, brush, can of hairspray, etc. are seated in the holster.

                                SPIKE/WILLIAM

                  What are you doing here?

                                ANDREW

Oh my God, oh my God...I'm SO sorry Will- Mr. Bentley. I didn't mean to just barge in like that, but...

Andrew's voice trails off and he licks his lips.  The camera pans back to Spike.  His arms are still resting behind his head, and we see what Andrew is staring at.  Spike's sheet is riding dangerously low, resting just under his hips.

                           ANDREW

              So, do you... umm... work out?

                           SPIKE/WILLIAM

              Look, Buffy's not here right now, so sod off.

                           ANDREW

Not here? What do you MEAN she's not here? Miss Summers had an 8:00 appointment, and I...

     Andrew glances at his watch.

                                ANDREW

I'm late! Oh no!  She's out there somewhere... with imperfect hair!! I'll never forgive myself if there are photographers around. I'm a horrible person!

Spike tries to hold back his laughter.

                           SPIKE/WILLIAM

Um... there, there. No worries. That makeup artist of hers said he'd take care of the hair too. You're off the hook.

                           ANDREW

Larry? She let Larry do her hair? That's it. I'm ruined. She is SO gonna to fire my ass! Larry can't tell hair mousse from hair gel. He doesn't know body from bounce. He thinks volumizer is a button on the TV changer! (Andrew is pacing back and forth, and looks near tears.)

Spike stands up, quickly wrapping a sheet around his lower half, and approaches Andrew, who has by this time stepped a few feet into the room.

                           SPIKE/WILLIAM

              Look, Buffy would never fire you.

                           ANDREW

              She wouldn't?

                           SPIKE/WILLIAM

              Nope.  She feels too sorry for you.

Andrew's eyes light up.

                           ANDREW

Oh, thank you, Mr. Bentley! You don't know how much this means to me. If you ever need anything, and I mean anyth...

Spike heads back toward the bed and points towards the door.

                           SPIKE/WILLIAM

              Out.

                           ANDREW

Oh.  Right.  But remember what I was telling you before about that affair thing.  The only way to find out how Buffy really feels is to cheat on her with some hunky...

Spike turns around and pushes Andrew out the door.

                           SPIKE/WILLIAM

Don't forget patrol's at 9:00 tonight. Try to be here early.

Andrew nods like an idiot as Spike shuts the door in his face.

DISSOLVE TO:

15   INT.  SUNNYDALE CONSTRUCTION OFFICE – DAY

We see a man's arm opening a door.  The door opens to show Buffy standing in the doorway.  She smiles and steps into the office, pulling the man into a hug.  We pull back to see that it's Xander, who awkwardly returns the hug and steps back.

                           XANDER

I heard that you were friendly, Ms. Summers, but I never dreamed this much.

Buffy smiles, blushing slightly and there's a trace of pain in her eyes.  Xander gestures towards the chair in front of the cluttered desk in the middle of the office and Buffy takes it.  Xander sits behind the desk.

                           BUFFY

Right. Sorry about that. You just...remind me of someone... a friend of mine.

Buffy stares at Xander for another moment, unnerved, but quickly recovers.

                           BUFFY

So, uh... this meeting. Wow. I mean... wow.  So tell me...

Buffy leans across the desk and whispers seriously.

                           BUFFY

              How do *you* think it's going?

Xander opens a drawer and rifles through it for a minute.  Buffy looks wildly around the room for some clue as to why she's there.  Her gaze rests on a tray of business cards and she eagerly plucks one from it's holder and we zoom in on it.  The card reads 'Sunnydale Construction' in large print and then has 'Alexander Harris' and a phone number.  Buffy shoves the card in her purse as Xander sits back up, spreading blueprints on top of his desk.

                           XANDER

I think it's going extremely well.  I put in the additions you requested and I think you'll be quite pleased.

              BUFFY

The additions, huh? Good to kn...

Buffy's eyes widen as she glances at the paper.  The camera pans over the blueprints, resting upon the title 'Bentley House'.

                           BUFFY

              What the Hell?

Buffy stand up quickly, knocking over her chair.  Xander is up in an instant, righting the chair again and helping Buffy sit down.

                           XANDER

              I can change them if you don't like them...

                           BUFFY

                  Who's Bentley?

                                XANDER

                  William Bentley, your fiancé.

     Buffy smiles quickly.

                                BUFFY

                  Of course.

                                XANDER

                  Do you not like the changes?

                                BUFFY

                  No, it's not that. I just...

     Buffy glances over the plans and her mouth gapes open.

                                BUFFY

And I can afford all of this? Even the... swimming pool, tennis courts, home theater, and...massage parlor?

                                XANDER

That's the great thing.  We're still well under your budget.  So we can add that... secret... room you wanted.  The... soundproof one?

              BUFFY

Why the heck would I want a secret, soundproof... Oh. Oh, God. Oh, oh, God.

Buffy lowers her head to her lap and brings her hands over her ears. After sitting like this for a minute, she stands up and extends her hand to Xander.

              BUFFY

I think that Sp-William and I need to... discuss... that one some more. Don't change anything yet. And... make sure you don't... you know... say anything about... that secret... laundry room. Wouldn't want that getting out, would we?

Buffy smiles weakly at Xander, who takes her hand and winks at her.

                           XANDER

Your secret's safe with me.  My wife and I have a secret... laundry room as well.  And you know what they say, 'discretion is the better part of valor', whatever that means.

              BUFFY

(Muttered)  Sounds like something Anya would do.

              XANDER

I forgot that you know my wife.

     Buffy's eyes widen as realization hits.

                                BUFFY

Your wife.  Anya.  Because Anya is your wife. With a secret la... Okay. I have to go now.  And if you talk to your wife soon?  Tell her to be expecting my call.

     Buffy stands quickly and heads to the door.

                                XANDER

                  Will do.

     Buffy exits and shuts the door behind her.

                                XANDER

                  Strange girl.

FADE TO:

16   EXT.  CITY STREETS – DAY

Buffy is walking idly down the street, gazing at her surroundings.  Her cell phone rings and she jumps into battle stance.  The phone keeps ringing and nothing attacks her so she slowly lowers her arms.

                                BUFFY

Your cell phone isn't a demon, Buffy. You need to answer it, not slay it.

Buffy pulls her cell phone out of her purse and gingerly holds it up to her ear. 

                                BUFFY

                  Hello?

CUT TO:

17   INT.  GILES' OFFICE – DAY

Giles is sitting at his desk, talking to Buffy on a headset.  Willow is showing him Buffy's schedule and he's circling things at random.  He shuts the appointment book and gestures for Willow to leave.  She exits the room and Giles smiles.

                           GILES

Buffy.  I'm glad that I caught you.  Andrew phoned my office and he's frantic, worried that you're wandering the streets alone with bad hair.  I'm sending the limo to pick you up a bit earlier than planned so that Andrew can fix whatever 'catastrophic damage Larry did to your hair this morning', and those are his words, not mine.

     There is a pause and the smile fades from Giles' face.

                                GILES

                  Buffy?

CUT TO:

18   EXT.  CITY STREETS – DAY

Buffy is walking slowly.  She glances behind her furtively and then stares straight ahead.

                           BUFFY

(Whispering)  Enough about my hair, Giles! I think... there's someone... or something following me.

CUT TO:

19   INT.  GILES' OFFICE – DAY

Giles sits up straight in his chair and quickly cleans his glasses.

                                GILES

You're on the streets?  Alone?  Buffy, how many times have I told you not to go out in public alone unless Faith is with you?

CUT TO:

20   EXT.  CITY STREETS – DAY

     Buffy stops walking.

                                BUFFY

                  Faith?

There is a pause as Giles answers her.  Buffy's free hand clenches into a fist.

                                BUFFY

Giles, I'm the Slayer. I slay. I can take care of it.  I don't need a bodyguard.  Especially not a red-leather-wearing, 'want-take-have'-spouting, 'five-by-five' bodyguard like Faith.

Buffy slowly spins around to face a clump of bushes that are slightly rustling.  She hangs up the phone and tosses it onto a patch of grass.

                           BUFFY

You want me? Come and get me. Let me show you what a real Slayer is made of.

Buffy waits for a second, anticipating an attack. When none comes, she lunges behind the bush and forces her stalker to the ground. She straddles their back.  We zoom out to see a camera lying broken in front of the 'attacker'.  Buffy spies the camera and jumps up.  She pulls the photographer onto his feet and sets the broken camera gently in his hands.

                           BUFFY

And that concludes my demonstration of how to disarm a mugger. Are there any questions?

The photographer looks around and bolts past Buffy and down the street.

                           BUFFY

              Like Faith could have done better...

              BLACKOUT

END OF ACT TWO


ACT THREE

21   SUNNYDALE CEMETARY - NIGHT

The entire gang is assembled for patrol.  Buffy and Spike enter the cemetery first, their arms linked.  Giles and Anya follow, both flipping through various black books and talking on cell phones.  Dawn has a notepad out and is taking copious notes.  Xander is talking to Willow, and we see Tara is at Willow's side, looking a little nervous.  Andrew and Jonathan bring up the rear.

                           BUFFY

Ahh, now this is normal. The whole gang together again, just waiting to kick a little demon ass.

     Spike nods and pulls Buffy behind a headstone.

                                SPIKE/WILLIAM

Look, pet, the others are here, so I was thinking we could...you know... finish where we left off this morning. You'll still have plenty of time for the interviews.

              BUFFY

Interviews?

     Dawn appears over the headstone and smiles.

                                DAWN

This is so exciting!  I get to patrol with you!  Thought of a good quote yet?

              BUFFY

Shouldn't you be at home doing your homework? It's awfully late for you to be out on a school night...

              DAWN

Not the kind of quote I was looking for.  And, in response, this is my homework. My assignment is to write about my hero, so I'm documenting a night in the life of Buffy Summers. Pretty cool, huh?

Buffy stands and pulls Dawn into a hug.  Dawn is uncomfortable and pulls away.

                           BUFFY

Oh, Dawnie...I'm your hero? That's the sweetest thing I've ever...

              DAWN

The internet is down at home so I can't research Susan B. Anthony, thus, here I am.  Hanging with the Slayer.  And if anyone from my English class even attempts to talk to you, pretend you're mute.  Seven girls tried to pick you to do their report on and I want the exclusive.

              BUFFY

You mean your entire class knows I'm the Slayer?

              DAWN

Well, yeah. Why wouldn't they? Everyone does, Buffy.

Buffy looks confused. Willow walks over to Buffy, pulling a reluctant Tara behind her.

                           WILLOW

Buffy?  I know you're busy but I wanted you to meet Tara before anyone actually started fighting.  She's going to play you in your new series and she wanted to 'immerse herself in her character'.

              TARA

Which I can do without bothering you, of course.

              WILLOW

But I assured her that you were very excited about the series and talking to Tara would be no problem. 

     Buffy's eyes widen.

                                BUFFY

                  Series?  As in... TV?

     Tara turns to Willow.

                                TARA

                  She doesn't know about the s-s-series?

Willow turns to glare and Buffy before smiling reassuringly at Tara.

                           WILLOW

Of course she does!  She's just being funny, aren't you Buffy?

     Tara turns to look at Buffy and Willow gives her a pointed look.

                                BUFFY

                  That's me, always trying to lighten the mood.

     Willow starts laughing and Tara joins her reluctantly.

                                TARA

I never knew you were such a comedian, Ms. Summers.

                                BUFFY

Tara... it's Buffy. Just Buffy. And... we don't already know each other?

     Tara's eyes widen.

                                TARA

We did meet that one time when you were signing autographs at the Bronze but I can't believe that you remember!  You're as kind as you are beautiful and strong, Miss- Buffy.  I don't know how I'll do you justice.

              WILLOW

You definitely have the beautiful thing down, Tara.

Tara blushes and Willow looks down at her feet.  Buffy smiles to herself and jogs to catch up with Anya, who is walking with Spike.

                           BUFFY

              Anya, we really need to talk.  Now.

Anya waves Buffy off.

                           ANYA

Do you really want to make a scene in front of the assembled 'Team Buffy'? 

     Anya turns to look behind her.

                                ANYA

                  Jonathan!

Jonathan catches up with Anya, Buffy, and Spike.  He is gasping for breath.

                           JONATHAN

              Ms. Summers?

                           ANYA

              Do you want anything, Buffy?  Anything at all?

                           BUFFY

              I could go for some shrimp.

                           JONATHAN

              What's 'shrimp'?

Buffy looks at Anya quizzically.  Anya smiles and mouths 'The dimension without shrimp, remember?'.

                           ANYA

Ms. Summers looks a little dehydrated.  Be a dear and get her some bottled water.

                                JONATHAN

                  Right away, Mrs. Harris.

Jonathan exits the screen, running, and Anya turns to smile at Buffy.

                           ANYA

All these people at your beck and call, isn't it just...

Buffy holds a hand up to silence Anya when she hears a rustle in the bushes.

                           BUFFY

              This had better not be another photographer.

A vampire jumps out at Buffy.

                           BUFFY

Finally.  I was beginning to think I wasn't going to see any action tonight.

                                SPIKE/WILLIAM

                  Well, if it's action you're looking for...

Spike raises his eyebrows at Buffy and grins suggestively.  Buffy pushes him out of the way.  She kicks the vampire in the chest and he goes down easily.  She frowns.

                           BUFFY

                           This is almost too easy...

Buffy pulls a stake out of her back pocket.

                           BUFFY

Well, you know what they say about easy vampires...

She is cut off when someone leaps out from behind her and quickly dispatches the vampire.

                           BUFFY

              Uh, do you mind?

The intruder turns to face Buffy and we see that it is Faith in a blonde wig.  The Slayers in training, Kennedy, Rona, Molly, Chloe, and Vi all run up behind her. All of them are wearing long blonde wigs.

                           MOLLY

              Good show, Faith.  I mean, Buffy.

Before she can respond, Andrew descends on Buffy.

                           ANDREW

You KNOW that you shouldn't be running like that! What do you think the stunt Slayers are for? The windblown look is only effective if done correctly, Miss Summers.

     Andrew pulls out a brush and a hairdryer from his holster.

                                ANDREW

                  Let's see if we can't fix that...

Andrew fixes Buffy's hair and pulls a tube of lipstick out of his holster.

                                ANDREW

Might want to touch up, and since Larry isn't here to do it. (A cough masks his next word.) Slacker...

Andrew applies the makeup and backs away just as a crowd of people with cameras and microphones enter the cemetery.

                           REPORTER 1

Miss Summers, how does it feel to have just slain another evil Hell spawned creature of the night?

Buffy is taken aback.  She blinks at the harsh lights coming from the video cameras.

                           BUFFY

              Well, you see, I didn't actual slay...

                           REPORTER 2

And is it true that your hair isn't naturally blonde? What are your thoughts on this scandal?

              BUFFY

I really don't think that...

              REPORTER 1

We see your fiancé is here...

     Reporter 1 motions to her cameraman to get a shot of Spike.

                                REPORTER 1

Does the couple that slays together stay together?

A photographer comes out of nowhere and begins snapping pictures, the bright flashes of light blinding Buffy.

                           PHOTOGRAPHER

Okay, now how about one of you next to the pile of dust? Good. (He snaps a picture.) And with William? Very nice! (He snaps another picture.) Now, if you could just unbutton your top button and...

     Giles steps between Buffy and the media.

                                GILES

Thank you all for your time, but that will be it for tonight. There will be a press conference tomorrow to answer any further questions. Good night.

The press begrudgingly leaves, getting a few last camera shots and pictures in as they go.

                                BUFFY

                  Uh, guys? Just what was that?

                                WILLOW

That was patrol, Buffy.  The exact same patrol scenario that we've gone through for six years...

Everyone heads toward the entrance to the cemetery, leaving Buffy standing alone, looking contemplative.

                           BUFFY

              Patrol scenario?

She runs to catch up with the gang.

FADE TO:

22   INT.  BUFFY'S HOUSE (WISHVERSE) – MASTER BEDROOM – DAY

Buffy is sleeping.  Light is streaming through the window, illuminating her face.  Spike leans forward, into frame, and places a tender kiss on her bare shoulder.  Buffy stirs and smiles.  She opens her eyes and rolls over to face him.

                           BUFFY

              Mmm... I could get used to this.

Spike pulls away and Buffy frowns.

                           BUFFY

              What? What did I say this time?

Spike smiles and kisses Buffy on the forehead, before disappearing out of frame.

                           SPIKE/WILLIAM (o.s.)

              Don't move.

Buffy smiles at him and rolls back over.  She closes her eyes and smiles again.  Her cell phone rings and she fumbles on the nightstand to answer it.

                           BUFFY

              See? I'm getting the hang of this already.

Buffy flips the phone open and holds it up to her ear.

                           BUFFY

              Yeah?

Buffy frowns and listens intently for a few minutes.

                           BUFFY

              I'll be right there. 

Buffy tosses the phone onto the floor, which we zoom in on as we hear the sounds of her quickly getting dressed.

                           BUFFY (o.s.)

              Stupid shoes.

We hear the door open and close and, soon, the door open again.  We zoom out to see Spike standing in the doorway, holding an immaculate breakfast tray, complete with a red rose in a vase.

                           SPIKE

                  Happy anniversary, B...

     Spike notices the empty room.

                                SPIKE

                  Buffy?

DISSOLVE TO:

23   INT.  GILES' OFFICE – DAY

Giles and Buffy are both staring intently at the unseen computer screen.  Giles is biting his lip.  Buffy rolls her eyes, steps back, and folds her arms over her chest.

                                BUFFY

                  This is your emergency?

                                GILES

It's not every day that one gets invited to an event of this caliber, Buffy.  I think that your public appearance is of the utmost importance.

              BUFFY

But 'emergency' usually construes something so big that...

Buffy begins to roll her eyes again, but stares at the screen once more.

                                BUFFY

Have you read this?  They really invited me to the Oscars? Me?  And they want me to present an award with... Freddie Prinze Jr.!  Giles, he's like... I can't!

                                GILES

You can and will, young lady.  As your manager, I insist.  And Willow is taking you to Rodeo Drive to shop for your gown and you have a spa appointment from 4 to 8 and then Andrew wants to consult with you about your hair at 8:30.

              BUFFY

I can totally get used to this.

FADE TO:

24   INT.  GILES' OFFICE – RECEPTION AREA – DAY

The office is empty and Willow is sitting at the desk.  She is on the phone and is nervously playing with the phone cord.

                           WILLOW

So, um, I'm going to take Buffy shopping and I know that you want to, um, be around me, I mean her, and so you can come with me, with us, if you want.  I mean, you're more than welcome.

     There is a pause and a relieved smile crosses over Willow's face.

                                WILLOW

That's great!  We'll leave whenever you can get here! 

Willow smiles a huge smile and hangs up the phone.  The main door opens and Tara enters.  She smiles shyly at Willow and blushes.

                           TARA

I was in the lobby when you called.  I was going to come up and see if you wanted to go to lunch with me.

                                WILLOW

I think Buffy is free for lunch, I can double check if you...

              TARA

With you.  I wanted to go to lunch with you.

              WILLOW

Oh...

     Realization sinks in and Willow blushes and smiles.

                                WILLOW

                  I'm free.  I'm definitely, definitely free.

                                TARA

                  Great.

                                WILLOW

Wait!  I'm not free!  At least, not for lunch.  I have to take Buffy shopping!

              TARA

I vaguely recall.  And I'm coming along, remember?

              WILLOW

Of course! 

              TARA

But maybe we could do something after.  Like dinner or...

Tara blushes and Buffy enters from Giles' office.  Willow and Tara look up at her guiltily.

                                BUFFY

                  Will! Did you hear about...

     Buffy trails off and takes in Willow and Tara.

                                BUFFY

Never mind. It's stupid, really. So... What have you two been talking about?

              TARA

Shopping!

              WILLOW

We're going shopping!  Me and Tara... and you!  For you!

              BUFFY

You know, if you two want to be alone, we can schedule this whole shopping thing some other time. I'm sure there's some press conference or 7-11 grand opening that really could use me right about now.

     Willow and Tara both blush and look at their feet.

                                WILLOW

                  We can shop.  We're shopping.

                                TARA

                  Yeah.  We can, um, be alone l-l-later.

Tara looks up at Willow and flashes her a half smile.  Willow returns the smile and Buffy smiles at them.

                           BUFFY

As long as there's a later, you're off the hook.  So, where to first?  Lead on, fellow shoppers.

Willow, Tara, and Buffy exit, laughing and discussing shopping plans.

FADE TO:

25   INT.  BUFFY'S HOUSE (WISHVERSE) – KITCHEN – DAY

Spike is standing by the counter, reading something intently.  We zoom in to see that he is studying a cookbook.  He smiles and shuts the book.  He heads out of frame and we see that the cookbook is titled 'Romantic Dinners for Dummies'.

FADE TO:

26   INT.  SPA – MASSAGE ROOM – DAY

Buffy is face down on a massage table, her lower half covered with a sheet.  A handsome masseuse is working on her shoulders.

                           BUFFY

I can't believe I'm saying this, but that was too much shopping.  At least I got the gown for the ceremony.  And those shoes.  Plus the matching purse.  Also, I really think those other 6 dresses are me.  Especially with the diamonds on.

FADE TO:

27   INT.  BUFFY'S HOUSE (WISHVERSE) – DINING ROOM – DUSK

Spike has the dining room table set for two and is lighting candles.  He finishes lighting them and looks at his watch, which reads 7:00.  He pulls out one of the chairs and sits, waiting.

DISSOLVE TO:

28   EXT.  CITY STREETS – NIGHT

     Willow and Tara are walking, their hands barely brushing together. 

                                TARA

                  Dinner was great.

                                WILLOW

                  Definitely great.

Tara stops in front of a building and turns.  Willow moves to stand in front of her.

                           TARA

              So this is where I live.

                           WILLOW

              It looks... nice.

Tara nods and bites her lip.  They slowly move into each other and share a tender kiss.

                           TARA

              Do you, um, want to come in?

                           WILLOW

              Okay.

Tara fumbles with her keys and opens the lock.  She holds the door open for Willow and then follows her in.

FADE TO:

29   INT.  BUFFY'S HOUSE (WISHVERSE) – DINING ROOM – NIGHT

Spike is still sitting in the chair.  The candles are halfway melted.  He sighs and pulls out his cell phone.  He dials a number and holds the phone to his ear.  We hear a faint ringing and Spike perks up.  He gets up and exits, looking hopeful.

DISSOLVE TO:

30   INT.  BUFFY'S HOUSE (WISHVERSE) – BUFFY'S BEDROOM – NIGHT

Spike enters the room at a run but stops suddenly when he sees Buffy's cell phone on the floor, still ringing.  His face falls and his shoulders slump, defeated.

FADE TO:

31   INT.  SPA – SALON – NIGHT

Buffy is sitting in a posh chair and someone unseen is doing her hair.  We zoom out to see that the hairstylist is Andrew.

                           ANDREW

              I think William is totally wrong for you.

Buffy examines her newly manicured nails.

                           BUFFY

              Really? Why would you say that?

                           ANDREW

              Please.  The boy belongs with me.

                           BUFFY

              Excuse me?

                           ANDREW

Yep.  And if he belongs with you why are you here with me on your anniversary instead of with him?  I'd never do that to him.

     Buffy pales slightly and then recovers.

                                BUFFY

Anniversary?  As if!  Like you would know when it was anyway?  Please.  Besides, you think he would have said something about it to me.  Planned something, gotten me a gift... Spike wouldn't forget about something like that.  Sorry, Andrew, looks like my hair is as close as you're ever going to get to him.  And I always knew you were gay!

              ANDREW

Honey, I've been out since preschool.

     Andrew curls a lock of Buffy's hair and steps back.

                                ANDREW

I've done all I can with you for today.  You'd better get home to William.

DISSOLVE TO:

32   INT.  BUFFY'S HOUSE (WISHVERSE) – DINING ROOM – NIGHT

Spike is sitting at the table again.  The candles are out and all the food has been cleared.  He's looking at a picture of him and Buffy on the cover of People.  The door opens and he looks up.  Anya enters.

                           ANYA

              Hey.

                           SPIKE

              You're not her.

Anya looks down at herself.

                           ANYA

              Nope.  Guess I'm not.

Anya sits down at the table next to Spike.

                           ANYA

              We are talking about Buffy, right?

                           SPIKE

              Who else would we be talking about?

Spike sighs.  He pulls a rose out of the vase and begins plucking the petals. 

                           SPIKE

              It's our anniversary today, you know.

                           ANYA

Is she upstairs or something?  I can go if you two want to...

     Spike slams his hands down on the table.

                                SPIKE

No, she's not bloody well upstairs!  You think The Slayer would have the time in her busy schedule to make it home for dinner once a year?  'Course she's not here.  Just like every other night...

                                ANYA

                  I'm sorry.  I wish there was something I could                    do for you.

                                SPIKE

Sure you do. So does everyone. But no one can. Do you know what I wish?

Anya sits up straighter in her chair.  She is excited but is trying to appear somber.

                           ANYA

              What do you wish?

                           SPIKE

I wish that things could be like they were before Buffy became famous.

     Anya morphs into Anyanka.

                                ANYA/ANYANKA

                  Here we go again.

     BLACKOUT

END OF ACT THREE


ACT FOUR

33   INT.  BUFFY'S HOUSE – LIVING ROOM – DAY

Buffy, Spike, Willow, Tara, Anya, Xander, Giles, Dawn, Andrew, and Jonathan are in the living room.  Buffy and Spike are on the couch, Dawn between them, trying not to look at each other.  Tara is seated in the chair and Willow is behind her.  She reaches to play with Tara's hair and pulls her hand back guiltily.  Everyone else is standing around looking at Andrew.

                           ANDREW

              What?

                           JONATHAN

              Dude.  You were so gay.

                           ANDREW

              So?  It was bizarro-land.

     Everyone turns to stare at Andrew.

                                ANDREW

Okay, okay, so maybe I'm a little gay... Kind of gay...  A complete and utter flaming homosexual?  Wow, that wasn't so hard.

                                JONATHAN

                  I knew it!

                                DAWN

                  How could you not?

     Xander shudders and everyone turns their attention from Andrew.

                                XANDER

The 'secret' room.  Those mental images are never going away.          

                                SPIKE

                  Jealous?

                                BUFFY

                  (Quietly) He had his own room.

     Everyone turns to look at Buffy.

                                ANYA

                  You told her about our secret room?

                                XANDER

We don't have a secret room!  We did have one in that world, but we're no longer there!  We're back in this one!

              BUFFY

We have shrimp again, right?

              TARA

That was the world without shrimp?

                                WILLOW

                  Um, guys?  How did we get to that world?

     Buffy blushes and shyly raises her hand.

                                BUFFY

                  That would be my fault.

                                ANYA

                  Technically, yes.

                                BUFFY

But not entirely! You- you were coaxing me!  It was a wish made under extreme duress.  Sitting there, with those wily demon powers... What was I supposed to do?

     Chaos ensues as everyone turns to yell at either Buffy or Anya. 

                                WILLOW

                  I wish we could go back.

Everyone instantly stops yelling and turns to Willow and then Anya.  Anya remains Anya and crosses her arms.

                           ANYA

I'm done.  No more vengeance.  It makes everyone hate me and my wishes never work out, anyway.

Before anyone can react, Anya rips her amulet off her neck, throws it on the ground, and stomps on it.  A swirl of light rises from the necklace and dissipates in the air.

                           ANDREW

              Whoa.  That was surprising.

                           SPIKE

              Surprising is right.

Spike looks at Anya for a moment, then turns to Buffy.

                           SPIKE           

Let me get this straight... you knew things were wrong?

              BUFFY

Well... yeah?

              SPIKE

And you didn't say anything?

              BUFFY

What could I have said? 'Hey, we're stuck in an alternate dimension that I wished us to and only Anya and I know?'  None of you would have believed me.

              SPIKE

Buffy, they worshipped the ground you walked on. They would have believed anything you told them.

              BUFFY

'They'?  As I recall, you were just as bad.  If not worse.

              ANYA

You were quite the love-sick little puppy.

Spike scowls and looks down.  He jumps a little and looks up at Buffy.

                           SPIKE

Wait a bloody minute... you knew that nothing was real and we still... you still slept with me.

     Xander shudders again.  Buffy glares at Spike.

                                BUFFY

                  It was... the wish.

                                ANDREW

You wished that you could sleep with Spike?  Why didn't I think of that?

              BUFFY

No, I didn't wish I could- eww... It was a spell.  I didn't ask to wake up next to Spike naked.  Or to be engaged to him.

     Buffy turns to Anya

              BUFFY

Can you explain to them, please?

                                ANYA

Buffy wished that her life was more glamorous.  She was only engaged to Spike because she loves him in this world.

              XANDER

Yeah!  She was only engaged to- what?

              BUFFY

                  Could you repeat that?

     Anya sighs and rolls her eyes.

                                ANYA

My powers never could create love.  That has to be a pre-existing condition.  Thus, in order for you to have loved Spike in that world, you have to love him here.

Xander and Anya look at each other, as do Willow and Tara.  Spike tries to catch Buffy's eye but she won't look anywhere near him.

                           BUFFY

              I... I have to go.

Buffy jumps up and runs toward the kitchen.  Spike jumps up and follows her.

CUT TO:

34   INT.  BUFFY'S HOUSE – KITCHEN – DAY

Buffy is sitting in the same chair Anya was in when the first wish was granted.  Her head is in her hands.

                           SPIKE

              Buffy...what she said.  Is it--

                           BUFFY

              No.

                           SPIKE

Where would she get the idea from then, luv?  There has to be some truth to it.

                           BUFFY

              I said there wasn't.

Buffy folds her arms over her chest and stares at the ground. A moment later, she looks up.

                           BUFFY

              You're still here?

                           SPIKE

Bloody right, I'm still here!  And I'll be here until I hear the truth.

                           BUFFY

Look, Spike. I'm sorry, but I just don't love y-

                           SPIKE

              (quietly) Don't say it.

                           BUFFY

              It's the truth, Spike.

                                SPIKE

So, what, you don't love me?  The whole time we were in Wacky World, you knew.  You knew it was wrong.  Why didn't you tell me then that you didn't love me?  Between the engagement and the hopping into bed with me and the whole nine yards.  What was that Buffy?  Stress relief?

                           BUFFY

I didn't think... I didn't know anyone would... remember.

                           SPIKE

And that makes it okay, does it?  You can have a nice shag and none of the bother of an actual relationship?  You're not like that, Buffy.  If we... it meant something to you, I know it.

                           BUFFY

Even if it did mean something...  It wasn't what you thought it was.  I'm sorry that I- I took advantage of you and it was wrong.

                           SPIKE

              And...

                           BUFFY

              And that's it.

                           SPIKE

That's it?  Look me in the eyes and tell me you don't love me.

Buffy looks him in the eye.

                           BUFFY

              I... I can't.

Spike smiles softly and brings one of his hands up to stroke her cheek.

                           SPIKE

              I know. I love you, Buffy.

Buffy pulls away from him. 

                           BUFFY

              And I can't love you. Ever.

                           SPIKE

              It's too late for that, pet.

                           BUFFY

              The last thing I want to do now is hurt you.

                           SPIKE

You don't want to hurt me? That's rich coming from you. All you do is hurt me, and here's me, coming back for more like the poof that I am. It ends now. No more, Buffy. Do you hear me? No more being yanked around and rejected. You can deny it for as long as you want, but I'm done. Until you can admit to yourself how really feel, there's no place for me. Not on patrol, not as your sidekick, not in your life. I'm going now. If you decide you need me, you can be the one to come crawling. You know where to find me.

He stalks off angrily. Buffy watches him leave and begins to cry.

DISSOLVE TO:

35   INT.  BUFFY'S HOUSE – LIVING ROOM – DAY

Anya and Xander are the only ones remaining in the living room.  They are standing about three feet apart, the smashed amulet between them.  Spike rushes through the room and out the front door, slamming it behind him.  Anya and Xander barely look up.

              DISSOLVE TO:

36   EXT.  BUFFY'S HOUSE – FRONT PORCH – DAY

Willow is sitting on the steps.  Spike rushes down the steps and runs off to the right.  Willow stares after him.  Tara approaches from the left and sits down next to Willow.

                           TARA

Penny for your thoughts.  Although I'm sure that they're worth at least a dollar.

     Willow turns to Tara and smiles.  There are tears in her eyes.

                                WILLOW

I was just thinking about us... about you.  And wishing that I could have done things differently.  Well, not wishing in the literal 'vengeance-demon-granting' sense, but, you know...

     Willow takes a deep breath and looks down slightly.

                                WILLOW

Tara, I really screwed things up and it hurts that... that there's nothing I can do to change what I did.  And there's not a day that goes by that I don't think about...

              TARA

Willow...

     Willow stops talking and looks up at Tara. 

                                TARA

Do you remember when Buffy came back and she was miserable because we pulled her out of...

     Willow gasps and brings a hand up to her mouth.

              WILLOW

Oh, God, Tara, no... Please...

Tara takes the hand in front of Willow's mouth and holds it tenderly.  With her other hand, Tara gently brushes a tear from Willow's cheek.

                           TARA

              It wasn't like that for me.

Willow exhales, relieved.

                           TARA

              I think that I was where Buffy was.

Willow looks confused.

                           WILLOW

              I thought you just said...

                           TARA

              But it wasn't heaven, Willow.  Not for me.

There is a pause as Tara takes a watery breath.

                           TARA

It wasn't heaven for me because you weren't there.  You're my paradise, Willow.  You always have been.  And nothing will ever change that.  Nothing

Willow raises her free hand to Tara's cheek and traces Tara's jaw line.  They kiss deeply and draw apart regretfully.

                           WILLOW

              When we were... when you... in the other...

                           TARA

              I know... I love you, too.

Willow looks down at their linked hands and smiles.

                           WILLOW

So what we did there... does that count?

              TARA

What do you mean?

     Tara blushes slightly.

                                TARA

                  Oh.

                                WILLOW

'Cause I'd hate for that to be our making up... when we didn't even know that we were... making up.

     Tara smiles her half smile and looks up at Willow.

                                TARA

                  You want to make up again?

                                WILLOW

                  And again and again.  And maybe again. 

Tara and Willow stand up and rush inside, the door closing behind them.  We pull back to look through the window, where we see Xander and Anya embracing tenderly.  Buffy brushes by them on her way upstairs, wiping tears from her cheeks. 

END OF EPISODE