With all the weird, strange, amazing, terrible, and utterly fantastical things that had occurred during her time at Beacon, it was little wonder that Ruby Rose had missed it. What with the constant barrage of sparring matches, homework assignments, Grimm extermination missions, pantry raids, panty raids, and all sorts of other weird shit straight out of an anime, it was completely understandable. Still, Ruby couldn't help but feel a little frustrated and even a bit left out over having missed what was essentially a source of miracles.
Especially since this source of miracles happened to be an extension of her own partner.
That's right, Weiss Schnee just so happened to be a maiden of miracles, a damsel of desires, a woman of wishes. It all started one night after a particularly exhausting venture into Grimm territory…
Team RWBY stumbled through the door of their dorm room, the four in various shades of non-lethal injury after having successfully exterminated a plethora of Grimm over the past forty-eight hours. They'd all been beaten up and were exhausted, but they'd won, and winning was all that mattered.
Yang had immediately collapsed on Blake's bed, too tired to climb up the stairway of pornographic books to reach her own. For her part, Blake was too tired to care, and curled up against the human heat source with a purr of relief. Ruby and Weiss had done likewise, only Ruby had managed the distance to her own perilously hanging bed before crashing.
As one, they all breathed out a simultaneous sigh of relief. They could finally take it easy… Well, they would have, but alas, tomorrow was a Monday…
"I wish school was cancelled for the next week," lamented Yang, before drifting off into slumber.
"Granted," mumbled Weiss, before following.
Ruby's ears perked up. What did that mean? She opened her mouth to question Weiss, but all that came out was a snore as the exhaustion caught up to her. Whatever, she'd deal with it in the morning.
When Ruby awoke, it was to the sound of her scroll receiving a message. She pulled it up. 'Classes canceled this week due to unforeseen incident. – Glynda Goodwitch'.
Weiss couldn't have… No way! But what if…
Ruby needed to test this. She needed to test this now. She dragged herself out of bed, insatiable curiosity replacing morning lethargy, and she fell deftly to the ground, landing softly before turning to give her partner a wake-up that was firm but graceful.
"Weiss Weiss Weiss Weiss Weiss!" she cried, shaking the heiress violently.
"AH!" screamed Weiss, alert and confused. "What is it?!"
"I wish my bed was made of strawberries!"
Suddenly, Ruby's bed spontaneously burst into strawberries, showering the two in a veritable downpour of fruit. A few seconds later, two heads popped out of the pile of red, both of them staring dumbly at what had just been wrought. Ruby stared at Weiss in awe, eyes wide and mouth open.
Weiss sighed. "Well, shit."
And so, Weiss sat down the good little girls of Team RBY and had storytime with them. After getting them all to stop pestering her about granting wishes, she delved straight into the remarkably stereotypical tragic backstory about her power and its usage as a child, thankfully skipping over details none of them would have paid attention to anyways. Then she tried bringing up the topic of the power itself, which resulted in yet another round of demanding wishes that halted only when Weiss encased Yang's mouth in ice.
Essentially, her power boiled down to the following: 1) Weiss could grant wishes. 2) Everybody only got one wish. 3) The power's activation required someone stating "I wish…" 4) Weiss could not control how wishes were carried out; she could only control if they were carried out.
And so, Ruby and Yang bummed out over wasting their wishes, the former lamenting not wishing for an infinite font of strawberries, the latter regretting not wishing for effortless good grades. Of course, it occurred to neither to wish for the destruction of Grimm, an end to world hunger, or anything similarly Remnant-shattering like that.
Her wish still intact, Blake approached Weiss with determination in her eyes. "I wish for humans and faunus to receive equal treatment," she wished.
Weiss nodded slowly. "Granted," she said hesitantly. She bit her lip. "Blake, I honestly don't think this wish is going to turn out how you want. It's not because I don't want it to," she added upon seeing Blake's brow furrow with the stirrings of anger. "It's because I've heard other people wish for the same thing, and I grant their wishes, but…" She shrugged and sighed. "Just please don't expect much to change."
Blake sniffed. "We'll see about that. In the meantime, I believe you have a floor covered in strawberries to clean up?"
"Me? Why should I clean these up when Ruby wished for them?!"
"You granted it," Blake deadpanned. "Besides, they're all over on this side of the room. Me and Yang,"
"Yang and I," interjected Weiss with annoyance.
"Are completely unaffected," finished Blake. To illustrate her point, she hopped back onto her bed and curled up underneath the blankets once more. After all, they had no reason to be up so early. Agreeing with her assessment, Yang yawned loudly, then slipped beneath the covers.
Ruby looked down at her feet guiltily as Weiss threw her an annoyed glare, the pair beginning to pick up all the little red fruits. Ruby mumbled apologies as Weiss muttered complaints. On the less helpful side of the room…
"…Yang, use your own bed."
"But Blake! It's warm here! And you didn't seem to mind last night," trailed Yang suggestively.
"Last night was different. Out!"
Blake made to shove her blonde partner out of her bed, but Yang was constantly shifting to avoid her elbows and knees, somehow managing to slip her arms around Blake in a warm embrace. Blake upped her struggling, but Yang just kept dodging, her hands and arms slipping around Blake to, dare Blake think it, accommodate her… After half a minute of pointless struggle, Blake sighed in defeat.
"Fine, just… hold me closer…" she said, drifting off in Yang's arms.
"Oblivious! He's so damn oblivious!" bellowed Pyrrha as she practically caved in the door to Dorm RWBY.
The raging Atlesian was treated to the sight of Yang and Blake cuddling in one bed, still asleep, and Ruby drawing up diagrams for the newest upgrade to Crescent Rose while Weiss immersed herself in the latest indie horror game off Beacon's DustNet, Nine Nights at Neptune's. None of them seemed overly concerned with the intrusion, and only Ruby spared a glance before she popped in a set of earplugs. Pyrrha's rants tended to drag.
And indeed, this rant was no different, as Pyrrha ranted for hours about the limitless bounds of ignorance to another's feelings and how Jaune may as well have been a block of wood for all she knew. ("A handsome block of wood but still a block of wood!") Yang had awoken briefly to make a crack about Jaune and wood, not that Pyrrha noticed, then promptly fell back asleep. Weiss had gotten her fix of horror for the week, then immediately decided she'd rather get a double dose of horror than actually listen to Pyrrha's ranting, so she started a playthrough of the spiritual sequel, Seven Sins of Sun. The only time this had actually gotten horrifying was when Weiss played through the chapter of lust and was forced to undergo what was essentially a bad fanfic of Sun and Neptune getting it on, complete with illustrations that were just anatomically improbable. Blake had actually gotten up to use the bathroom, then slipped out to grab her team a hot lunch, and avoid Pyrrha. Ruby just kept planning the beautification of her weapon. Finally though, it came to an end.
As Team RWBY sat around the table they'd set up to eat the lunch Blake had so graciously bought for them, Pyrrha deflated with a final round of hot air. "I wish Jaune had the sensitivity to pick up on my feelings!" she wished inadvertently.
"Granted," muttered Weiss through a mouthful of food.
Suddenly, an unfamiliarly familiar scream erupted from Dorm JNPR, and the five girls leapt up and raced over to see what had happened. They'd expected to find Nora squawking and rampaging after finding out they'd run out of pancake mix, or perhaps Ren doubled over in a bizarre sensation of agonizing ecstasy after a round of Seven Minutes in Valhalla.
No one expected to find a shell-shocked short-haired blonde girl wearing Jaune's clothes crying on the floor, hands clasped over her chest.
Silence reigned for several seconds, before Ruby mustered up the courage to say something.
"…Jaune?" she asked.
The girl on the floor looked up at her, eyes welling up with tears. "Ruby! Help!" she exclaimed, "I've been turned into a girl!"
Four pairs of eyes widened as Team RWBY took in the scene, the dots connecting instantaneously. Silence reigned again, before Yang suddenly bellowed out with laughter, falling to the floor in a fit of hysterics.
"We can call her Joan!" she shouted before her fall into unintelligible howls. This turned out to be the final trigger, as Ruby, Weiss, and Blake immediately followed suit, collapsing into various degrees of uncontrollable mirth.
As for Pyrrha, she swallowed tightly and exhaled. She held out a hand to the girl. "It's okay, Jaune. You're still you on the inside, and that's what we all know and love."
Joan looked up at her, and a flood of emotion filled her eyes. "Oh Pyrrha… You like me, don't you?"
"Of course I like you! What kind of question is that?"
Joan blushed. "I mean… you 'like' like me…"
Pyrrha blushed. "Oh. Yes. Yes I do. I have for a while now."
"I… I know this isn't the best time for this, but…" Joan bit her lip. "Would you like to go out sometime?" she asked, turning away shyly.
"Yes! Yes I'd love to!" exclaimed Pyrrha, jumping on the newly genderbent blonde in excitement.
"Kyaa!" cried Joan, before being silenced as Pyrrha's lips crashed down on hers.
All in all, it was a very sweet scene, especially once Team RWBY had settled and finally managed to drag themselves back to their room. But of course, all good things…
"Hey Pyrrha! I think I'm bigger than you!"