A suggestion of mine which you will not take
is to pack your belongings and steal away
for the play is in progress and what's to come
may not be your thought of marvellous fun
Tainted Love - Kwan
The thing is that Steve has no idea how he found himself straddling Tony Stark's lap, or kissing his lips with his fingers in Tony's hair. No, Steve doesn't know how that happened, it doesn't mean he's not enjoying though. It may be the loud music and the alcohol running through his veins but he really likes the way Tony tastes and how he lets out those tiny moans every time Steve grounds his hips against his.
Steve always knew something wasn't the same for him as the rest of the boys his age. He studied his friends, the way they behaved, the way they chased after girls, and nothing felt like his style. This right now just only proved his theory that Steve wasn't attracted to girls. "God, you taste divine!" Tony moans and trailing kisses down the columns of Steve's throat forcing a whimper out of him, his large hands squeezing Steve's ass.
Steve isn't a virgin by any means, he lost it to Sharon one very hard night during Homecoming. Thinking back to it now he can see why it wasn't that great for either of them. Tony though makes him feel things he hasn't before. If this is how kissing feel with him Steve can't wait to find out about the rest. Because something tells him this won't be the first or last time they do this.
"You do too." Steve groans back and dives in for another kiss.
"I think I'm gay." He says one night while they have a Pirates of the Caribbean marathon and Natasha barely bats an eyelid. Instead she shoves another handful of popcorn in her mouth. The thing is that he expects Natasha to be calm because out of all his friends she's the most open minded but not this calm. Steve pushes it to the back of his mind and goes back to the movie.
"I think I'm gay." He repeats again when she's slipping the third movie into the Blu-Ray and this time her face displays some kind of emotion but he's not sure what to label it.
"You think or you know?" She drawls flopping down beside him.
"I know." He admits quietly. "I made out with Tony Stark." He adds as an afterthought. "Like a lot!" That does get her full attention and Natasha twists on her seat to face him.
"You dog!" She laughs slapping his bicep. "Tell me everything about it!" She orders, eyes wide with excitement, but then again Natasha has been saying he needs to get laid for ages. Of course she'll be excited now that he found someone for that.
"Well…" He says and delves into the story of how he and Tony Stark hooked up at Loki's party.
"Moral Compass!" Steve stops dead on his tracks as the familiar voice gets closer. His heart definitely doesn't skip a beat, or ten, nor is his breath hitching because suddenly what they did comes back full force.
"Tony." Steve says evenly, turning to face the man in question. There he is before him in all his handsome glory a StarkPad in hand, looking like he owns the place. "How can I help you?" He asks and Tony's lips tag on a half smile.
"Actually I'm the one doing all the helping." Tony shots back without missing a bit. "Ms Hill said you need help with your math and I offered to tutor you. Monday, Wednesday and Saturday at seven pm sharp. My place." He informs Steve and he's gone before poor Steve can even protest. Because he would protest if given the chance, he doesn't think him and Tony alone in the same room is a good idea. If Steve knows one thing though that's to pick his battles and this ones is lost before it even begins.
He's screwed, both literally and figuratively.
It escalates quickly but it's not like Steve expects anything else. They're sitting too close to each other and Tony's cologne fills his nostrils with every breath Steve takes and really, who cares about the square root of Pi anyway? It's not like him to be so careless but Tony is right here and Steve just can't fight it. He leans in and drop a gentle kiss on Tony's lips. It takes Tony only a few seconds to realise what's going on and it's a lost cause after that. The thing with Tony is that if you give him an inch he'll take a mile and that's how they find themselves on Tony's bed making out like there's no tomorrow.
It becomes a thing after that, Steve will find himself kissing Tony more often than not and he's quite alright with it. He's absolutely fine with it to be honest, even when kisses turn to more, much, much more. But this time it feels right, this time whatever they do feels good, extremely good, too good to be legal. They start off slow, gentle kisses, soft touches that set nerves alight, there's no rush.
They have sex six months into their relationship, Tony clarified he's not willing to share him with anyone else, and it's everything it wasn't with Sharon. Later, much, much later they'll lay tangle together and it will be the most perfect and right thing Steve will ever feel. He leaves Tony's place with a skip on his step and calls Natasha on his way home.
"What?" She bites into the receiver harshly and a little out of breath.
"Did I interrupt something?" He asks concerned and he can hear a voice saying something in the background.
"Nothing important." She answers gentler. "Did something happen?" Her voice takes a familiar tone, the one she uses when she thinks someone might have hurt a person she loves.
"No." He says. "Yes." He adds on a second thought. "Tony and I had sex." He whispers lowly afraid someone might hear him even though it's like half past ten on a winter night and the streets are empty. There's silence on the other end of the receiver for a few long moments and Steve's afraid of what Natasha might say.
"I'll be at your place fifteen minutes tops." Are her only words before she cuts the line short making Steve shake his head in amusement.
Natasha is buzzing on her seat, like literally buzzing from excitement and Steve is beyond amused, thank you very much. He's been updating her on how his night was, leaving nothing out by her request and she's been pulling his leg all through the whole thing. "Was it better than Homecoming?" She asks twirling an auburn curl between her fingers.
"Homecoming." He snorts. "Doesn't even measure up to how good making love with Tony was."
"Aw!" Natasha coos and moves closer to him, wrapping her arms around his shoulders. She's so tiny compared to him. "My baby boy is all grown up and has a boyfriend too!" She whips a fake tear away and Steve pushes her away gently. "I'm really happy for you though." She says falling back against his sheets, stretching over the huge bed.
"I'm lucky to have you as a friend." He smiles down at her, grateful for having someone like her that loves him and accepts him for who he is.
"You have it all wrong." She smiles back. "I'm the lucky one."
In retrospect they shouldn't have come to the bleachers so early. They both know better, but the sun just started setting in and practice has been done for at least two hours. Tony claims there's no one left on the school grounds and Steve is horny enough to not question so of course someone will walk in on them. That's how they find themselves standing awkwardly across Lance Hunter.
"Look," Hunter says calmly. "Whatever this is, it's none of my business." Steve doesn't realise that he's stopped breathing until he exhales loudly.
"Hunter-" Tony tries to speak but Hunter cuts him off.
"Seriously, Stark." He says again. "Don't stress it, just next time be more careful. You don't want Hand onto this." Hunter motions between Steve and Tony lightly.
"I own you one." Tony offers and Hunter smirks.
"I'll hold you to that." Hunter says as he turns on his heels, walking back the way he came.
They learned their lesson after the incident with Hunter and they did become more careful. Add to that the rumour Natasha started about dating Tony and no one questions why they spend so much time together anymore. Steve's her best friend and Tony is her 'boyfriend' so they are bonding. It's that simple, or at least that's what Steve wants to believe.
It works for a while, they'll either meet at Tony's place (his parents are away more often than not) or at Natasha's (her uncle Ivan works until late and Natasha has no problem with letting them crush there). All good things come to an end though and their happiness is cut short. They start getting reckless about the whole thing and after an evening fooling around they fall asleep on Tony's bed forgetting about their secret.
Steve swears that's he'll never forget Howard's poisonous glare or the way he asks Steve to get out and tells Tony to get his 'sorry ass' to Howard's office and leaves them to get dressed. Tony doesn't speak and it's a first for him because normally he won't shut up. It puts Steve on edge, seeing Tony like that, knowing what is about to come makes his heart ache. It's not until Tony is pulling him in for one more kiss that Steve feels like breathing again.
"You should go home." He says resting his forehead against Steve's. "I'll take care of this and come to find you later."
"Don't." Tony cuts him off. "I don't care what he's going to say, it won't change anything between us. But my father and I have a lot to talk about and to be frank this was a long way coming. What happened today was just the last drop." Tony rubs his nose against Steve's and something tags on Steve's heartstrings.
"I love you." He murmurs and the most brilliant smile he has ever seen splits Tony's face in two.
"I love you more." Tony says in return and that's all Steve needs to hear.
The walk home feels longer than it actually is, Steve's mind is still with Tony but there's nothing he can do about it. He knows he'd make things worse if he stayed back. They talked about Howard many times, about his expectations from Tony, how he pushed and pushed so his son will follow in his footsteps and that's clearly not something Tony wants yet Howard doesn't seem to care. Steve doesn't need more to know how Howard will react to their relationship.
"Stevie!" Winifred's voice brings him out of his thoughts as he closes the door behind him. "I thought you were staying at Natasha's until late." She smiles as she steps into the hallway to greet, wiping her wet hands on her apron. "Diner is not ready yet."
Steve looks at her for a few seconds, contemplating what happened minutes ago at Tony's. Both she and Bucky are the closest Steve has to a family since his parents died and they took him in. He owns them that much to be honest with them, and he has to come clean; and then if they don't want him anymore…. Well, he doesn't want to think about it, or about what's happening at Tony's house right now and suddenly what they've been doing for months feels equal parts of right and wrong. Steve just can't understand why being with Tony is so bad in everyone's eyes, love is love and everyone should be allowed to experience it.
"We need to talk." He says finally and Winifred's face falls a little but the look on his face is enough for her to know it's something important.
"Let me get, Bucky." And she's gone, hurrying up the stairs.
"Are you going to tell us what's wrong or what?" Steve can tell Bucky is on edge by the harsh tone of his voice.
"James." Winifred chastises him cupping Steve's hand gently. They've been sitting together in the dining room for the past forty five minutes waiting for Steve to talk but the words just won't come out. Which is why Bucky is at his wits end.
"There's something I've been keeping a secret." Steve finally admits. "Something very important to me and you might not look at me the same way after I tell you."
"Did you kill someone?" Bucky teases, a half smile tagging at his lips.
"Feels like it." Steve shrugs feeling a little bit at ease. "I've been seeing someone for the past few months." Winifred just smiles cryptically, shaking her head as if she's in to a secret Steve doesn't quite know.
"And?" Bucky presses more urgently now.
"It's Tony Stark." Finally it's out in the open and Steve feels like a weight has been lifted from his shoulders. He can't take it back nor does he want to, it feels nice to be honest for once.
"And?" Both his surrogate mother and the man he sees as a brother say at the same time like Steve hasn't just dropped a bomb on them. To be honest judging by Howard's reaction he expected anything but calm by them.
"I'm gay." Steve repeats and they don't even bat an eyelash.
"We knew that." Bucky says in a matter of fact tone and Steve's jaw hits the floor.
"How?!" He squeals and Winifred lets out a small laugh.
"Oh darling!" She smiles cupping his cheek gently. "You weren't as sneaky or quiet as you like to believe." Steve's face flushes a bright pink at her words.
So much for being discreet.
Dinner is spend in a pleasurable buzz but Steve's mind is always with Tony. Both Winifred and Bucky sat him down and explained to him that who he is in love with is none of their concern as long as Steve is happy. Love is love and that's all that counts. He's still their 'Stevie' and they are still his family and nothing will change that. Winifred had a deep friendship with his parents before the accident that cost them their lives and she had promised to his mother's grave that she'd take care of Steve one way or another.
"Steve." A small knock on his door brings him out of his thoughts. "You have company." Bucky winks and steps aside to reveal Tony awkwardly shuffling his feet behind him and Steve lets out a relieved breath.
"Hi." Tony murmurs and it's so different from what he's used. Tony is always so sarcastic and cocky but now he looks… He looks at peace? Steve can't quite tell.
"Hi." Steve whispers in return and he has no idea why he's glued to his desk chair.
"Can you give us a moment?" Tony asks and Bucky nods smirking.
"I'll close the door too." Bucky teases as he turns on his heels. "But no funny business!" He calls over his shoulder.
"Scout's honour!" Tony yells back laughing as he takes a seat on Steve's bed and Steve joins him a moment later. He's not sure what to expect, he has convinced himself that Tony will break it off for one reason or another. "So…" Tony drawls.
"So?" Steve says too.
"Went better than I thought." Tony finally speaks and his words are paired up with a sincere smile that makes all of Steve's worries wash away. "I expected to be disowned or something but as it turns out my father just got his ass handed to him."
"What happened?" Steve's curious too, there aren't many people that will oppose Howard Stark and to know someone did it to support them? He has to know.
"My mom called Aunt Peggy." Tony laughs shaking his head lightly. Steve has heard about Peggy Carter before, war heroine, the woman legend that was one of the best active operatives during WW II and she didn't stop there, no, she continued her work to this day trying to do as much good as she could. Peggy worked with Tony's grandfather several years and later with his father too and she has become an important member of the Stark Family. She was and still is amazing, a true role model to Steve even though he hasn't met her yet. "It's the first time in my eighteen years that I've seen my father with his tail between his legs. Aunt Peggy didn't let him get out even a letter and declared more or less that if I am in love with you I am free to be so and she can't understand how a man like father can have such backward ideas. If she's okay with the way things are so will be he and the subject is not up for discussion. Then moved to the drawing room to have tea with mom."
"Seriously?" Steve asks laughing too.
"I swear." Tony murmurs and cups Steve's cheeks gently resting his forehead against Steve. "I see your family took it way better than mine." He teases dropping innocent kisses on Steve's lips, his thumps caressing Steve's cheeks lazily.
"They did." Steve sighs and finally deepens the kiss, his fingers in Tony's hair pulling him closer. "Now what?" Steve whispers as they pull back in need of air.
"We are still us." Tony says as they fall back against the best tangled together, Steve's head laying on Tony's chest. "We have a few weeks of school left and then we have college and then I hope someday you'll be crazy enough to marry me." Steve can't help but smile at Tony's plans.
"Well, you'll have to work for it." Steve mocks leaning on his elbow gazing down at Tony. "I mean I'm not gonna make it easy for you, you''l have to have a ring and a good plan and-" Tony chokes anything else Steve has to stay with another kiss that leaves them breathless.
"When the time comes," He kisses a trail down Steve's neck. "I promise it's going to be spectacular."
"When the time comes then." Steve agrees and pulls him in for another kiss.
When the time comes sounds pretty good to him for now.