Passions of my Heart by Yukitsu

Disclaimers - Yu Yu Hakuho does not belong to me. They're owned by their owners (obviously). Anyway, I'm just borrowing, please don't sue.

The idea of Touya and Jin being together struck me as I was watching Lantis and Eagle stare at each other. (Kawaii!!!) and I remembered the YYH episode that happened the day before. Then the idea of Touya actually being a girl came to me as I was attacked by my opposite-gender senses while I was watching his fight with Kurama. I just kinda know when the person, animé or not, is a homo, or somebody pretending that he/she is one of the opposite sex. Anyways, it's all kinda weird... (",) Well... on with the fic!

Dedications to my dear Tomo-chan, Ayuro Shinja.

And my soul sis, Ayori-neesan, Banana, and Gorrs

* text * -- thoughts

_ text _ -- emphasis



He stared at blue eyes. Eyes that gazed down on him tenderly as the owner took care of his injuries.

"Touya...." Jin barely managed to whisper. His fight with Urameshi had drained him so much that he couldn't even stand on his own. Touya had to support him all the way to the room that they shared. *And Touya had been injured too...*

"Nani?" Touya asked, startled. He thought that Jin was already asleep because he wasn't moving at all.


"For what?"

"Taking care of... me.... Even though your also injured"

"But I'm fine. Kurama-san didn't really hurt me all that badly."

"Yeah right. If he didn't hurt you very badly, then why were you not able to get up?" Jin asked.

"Uhh... You... you shouldn't talk. You lost a lot of strength, you have to rest." Touya finally stammered.

"Hmmm..." Jin mumbled, already on his way to dreamland.

"Baka...." Touya whispered affectionately. After dressing up all of Jin's injury, Touya got up and stumbled towards his bed, barely managing to curl up under the blankets before falling asleep, completely forgetting to clean his wound.


Chapter 1

"Naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh...." Jin yawned lazily as he stretched on his bed. *A good night sleep sure does wonders on a tired person.* He looked over to his teammates bed, expecting to find it empty, since Touya usually gets up at the crack of dawn. But instead of an empty bed, he found Touya curled up, still as a rock. His sensitive ears could hardly hear him breathe.

"Touya!" Jin instantly got up and went to his friend's side.

"Touya!" He shook Touya hard, trying to feel youki as well.


Touya's beathing became more labored as Jin rolled him to his back. He was even paler than usual, almost as white as the walls. Jin put out his hand, intending to give some of his ki to Touya to help him, but nothing came. He was still short of energy.

"Shit! Touya, wake up!" He was shaking him harder this time, noticing that Touya was deathly cold. "Shit!"

Jin grabbed the sheets and yanked it off, hoping that it would wake him up. It always worked when Touya did it on him....

What he saw made him gasp.

Touya's belly, where Kurama had stabbed him was stained a dark red where the blood had spilled and dried. Almost the whole of his chest and his bed was painted with the same pigment. Dying...

As Jin stared at his friend, it became silent. Awfully silent... Jin finally noticed that Touya's breathing had stopped.

"Touya!" Without thinking, he opened Touya's mouth and covered it with his own, forcing as much oxygen as he could into his friend. He repeated it again before getting up to pump Touya's chest, making sure that he did everything correctly, totally ignoring the feeling under his hands.

Touya coughed, rolled to his side and started breathing deeply.

Jin gave a sigh of relief, before sinking to sit on the bed besides Touya's head.

"Baka! Don't ever do that again!" He managed to growl at Touya.

Touya looked up at him wearily and muttered his thanks.

Jin gathered Touya in his arms and rested his friend's head on his lap. Touya, caught unaware, gasped and stared at him, although his view of Jin was totaly lopsided.

"Baka.... You don't know how scared I was... baka...." Jin whispered, making Touya gaze at him in confusion. *He... cares?*

"Gomen.... I forgot to clean up, and the wound just sort of opened and I didn't know.... Gomen..." Touya said in a low whisper. *He really cares?*

Jin made an effort to look cheerful and carried Touya to his own bed. He really had been scared. He had seen most of his teammates die in front of him, but it didn't affect him. But when Touya almost died, he had been scared.

So scared, in fact, that he panicked.

And he never panics.


He didn't know why, though. Why he had been scared. Sure they were close, he was closer to him than to any other of his teammates. But not by much. Despite Jin's cheerful appearance, he was really usually left to himself by his other comrades when not in battle. Only Touya accompanied him. Jin knew that he shouldn't think that there was something deeper about it, Touya was friendly with everybody. Seemed to care for everybody, even that baka Bakuken!

But why? Why do I feel this way?

Is it possible that I...

"Jin?" Touya inquired silently, trying to ignore how warm the bed was against his own cold skin. Jin looked up at him, startled out of his thoughts.

"I'm going to clean you up. Look at yourself!" he went off to the bathroom to get a basin of warm water, clean rags and the first aid kit. And to reorganize his thoughts. *Jin, you're walking on dangerous grounds.... PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER!!!*

"Wait! I'll do it myself! You... you don't have to bother!" Touya protested, trying to get up as Jin approached him. He winced as pain shot up and down his body. *Shit!*

"It's alright, I don't mind. Remember, you helped me last night. Consider this as my payment." he said as he laid the things down on the table on the side of the bed.

"No! I can manage... Thanks... really, but I-"

"You lost more than half your blood and almost all of your youki. You can't _possibly_ manage"

"But... but... I... You.... You don't have to! I... I can do it myself." Touya vehemently protested, doubting inside if he really could.

"Why not? Do you have some _secret_ that you're keeping from me?" Jin asked, staring intently at Touya's eyes.

*I did feel _something_ under that* Jin thought as he remembered the time he pumped his chest

"Of course not!" Touya instictively denied. Jin narrowed his eyes. *I'm _sure_ I felt something. He's a...*

"There's nothing. Ok?" Jin stared at her.

"Ok....I... I'm... I'm... a... a..." Touya clutched at his chest, a blush creeped to his cheeks as he turned his head away from Jin's intense stare, desperately trying to make up an excuse. But drew up a blank.

"Well?" Touya decided that he couldn't lie anymore. *Oh God,please help me!*

"I'm a girl." he --- _she_--- whispered in shame.



Wow! I finished a chapter! I really finished a chapter!!! For the first time in my life, I actually typed down a YYH fanfic! (The others are handwritten) Thank you so much for reading this... thank you soooooooooo much! Soooo, do I continue? or do I not? It all depends on the reviews that I'll receive... heck, I'll be happy to get flames. It means that somebody's actually reading and thinking about this. (",) Anyway, thanks again! ja! -- ----Yuki Kitsune no Tsuki


Nani - What

Arigato - Thank you

Baka - Idiot

Gomen - Sorry / I'm sorry

Tsuzuku - To be continued

June 1, 2002

I never got around to making a plot with this, but Touya and Jin has been in love with each other for the longest time before this happened. Just in case some of you find it fast.