Things Poppo is no longer allowed to do (By Tomomo). Warnings: Crack fic.

1. After gruesome demise of Poppo 50, Poppo is no longer allowed to eat her spoils of war where QP can see her.

1.1. Doubly so if it's QP-Dangerous.

2. Trying to steal that zipper from Suguri is a horrible idea. Don't do it.

2.1. Trying to steal Hime's hair flower is even worse. Last thing I need is another final boss on a rampage here.

3. Poppo is no longer allowed to write fanfiction about anyone or anything, especially not about anyone else in this game. You have a sick, sick mind. I would also like to remind everyone

that I'm NOT pregnant with Yuki's child (kitten?), nor am I secretly escaped alien shapeshifter monster from hell.

4. Poppo is no longer allowed to go trick-or-treating with ANYONE. This Halloween was a disaster. Only reason why we aren't all in jail or dead is dimension hopping and dumb luck.

4.1. RNG save us from sugar rush.



4.3. Shut up. Now.

4.4. Ahahaa, but Kyoko put out that house so everything was good and fun in the end right!

4.5. Do you want to go back to the solitary confinement Kae?

4.6. Wait, Nanako, where in the world did you ge-EEEEAAAGGRH! NO STOP I DIDN'T MEAN IT STOoop

4.7. Note to self: You can, in fact, escape her Bits. Other things she has, not so much. Kyoko says I will heal in time, and I can offer a proper apology to Kae then. Great.

5. Poppo is no longer allowed to use Here and There on people looking for toilet.

5.1. Or Go Away.

6. You are not a bird, so you are not allowed to join the Seagull Mafia. Not even if they have cookies. Saki makes better cookies anyways.

6.1. You are not allowed to sell Saki to the Seagulls dammit!

7. You are NOT allowed to hit on Mixed Poppo. You are basically the same person for RNG's sake!

8. Marc asked me to tell you that next Poppo she finds hiding in her plane after takeoff will be dropped off without a question and then NUKED.

9. You are not allowed to drink tea with Fernet. She holds grudges, and is not above poisoning you to get her revenge.

10. You are not allowed to hold "manliness contest" among male characters. A) There is hardly any males here and b) Peat and Kai were both depressed for weeks since they were beaten by a black blob of goo and a gay stripper. Even Jonathan scored better than them.

11. You are no longer allowed to sneak behind Sora with airhorns. I know you only tried to cheer her up since she's always so gloomy and doomy, but PTSD -induced freakouts are no joke. I lose far too many Poppos that way.

11.1. Not to mention it takes ages to cheer her up afterwards geez – Sham ~~

12. You are not allowed to dunk Roboball. Poor Roboball did nothing wrong.

12.1 That didn't mean you can go ahead and dunk her, Shifu's Robot! Put that Poppo down now.

13. The Chicken did not cross the road to wreck some shit. That is just an urban legend.

14. You are not allowed to steal Krila's plushies. She's a creepy eyepatch-wearing goth girl. Those plushies will likely steal your soul in return, even though they ARE cute.

15. You are not allowed to challenge Syura into any kind of gaming at all. That gets out of hand way too quickly. Also, that's a Chicken, not a Piyo. Tell her to return it where she found it.

16. You are not allowed to laugh at Alte blowing herself up. Not even if she was just trying to cook. That is a tragic...oh who am I kidding here.

17. You are no longer allowed to play Castle Crashers. You get ideas.

17.1. Also, Binding of Hime is not a real game. Suguri was just trying to cover up her fe– o-oh, hey Suguri, how's it going...?

17.2. Ow

18. Give those presents back to Aru right now or you'll be sorry.

19. ...Did anyone see Sherry anywhere? It's been awfully quiet for a while.

19.1. No, not that kind of sherry! Put that back right now!