Regarding Canon:

This is AU

I just want this to be clear coming out of the gate. This Will NOT follow Sword Art Online canon. While some aspects will remain constant with it a large portion of it will be changed for the sake of my idea for this story. While I won't reveal all the differences as of yet but, I will tell you that Kirito did NOT get into a relationship with Asuna during the events of Sword art online, although she does have the same feelings for him as in Canon. Kirito also had a closer relationship with Argo and other individuals who may or may not have been in SAO in Canon (as in they came in later, not that they're OCs). The events of the Fairy Dance Arc did happen (with some changes) but Kirito, rather than going in solely for Asuna, went into ALO because several of his friends were trapped within. On a side note Kirito still met Yui and went through a similar series of events although by himself so while Yui will still refer to Kirito as her father, she will not refer to anyone as her mother.

Speaking of Yui, I intend to make it so that AI's of Yui's level are still a pipe dream for everyone else as the only reason she became as advanced as she is was through the piling up of errors and the like resulting in a change.


Two figures could be seen together in a room, one was sitting up in bed staring at the other with a deadpan face whilst said other leaned casually up against a wall.

"So let me see if I got this straight" the figure on the bed began "you're a devil, specifically a high class one from the house of Marchosias".

"Yep, I'm the heiress in fact" the other responded.

"And back at the hospital, after I let him live, that asshole Sugou pulled a gun on me and shot me in the back, killing me."

"Four shots point blank, tore through your lungs and several of your arteries, you died basically instantly."

"This was when you arrived, decapitated Sugou, and then proceeded to dispose of his body."

"Yep, I also made the local police think he'd died in an accident and already been buried."

"Right," a sigh "then you proceeded to resurrect me by turning me into a devil, using one of these so called evil pieces, which, while reviving me, simultaneously made me your servant."

"A queen piece specifically and yes, in the eyes of most devils you now belong to me."

"Yeah… as a guy I have mixed feelings on being a queen…and being a servant for that matter."

"Get over it Kii-bou, the queen's the strongest piece you know"

"Still… anyway, so I'm the only person in your peerage currently and the reason you didn't recruit Asuna or the others is because you, along with the Gremory Heiress because polygamy is apparently legal for devils, are currently engaged to an arrogant prick that makes Kibaou look well mannered."

"He's not just arrogant you know, he also a bastard, an worthless sack of shit, a womanizer, and a manwhore, on top of being an ignorant pile of -"

"Okay I get it… and because the underworld isn't exactly as progressive about human, or rather devil, rights as human countries are he could basically do anything he wants with your servants short of badly injuring or killing them and it would be considered completely fine, and since the others are all girls you don't want to risk our friends being turned in that douche-bag's toys."

"I don't want to marry the jackass but I'm not going to drag my friends into something like that, on top of the fact that we only have 6 months before I have my match against Riser deciding if the marriage will be called off or not."

"And to beat Riser you think it's better to have a few really strong people rather than a bunch of somewhat strong people due to the nature of his immortality, which is bullshit by the way, and it's relation to his mental state."

"With him being constantly smashed by superior numbers he'll likely manage to cling on with the idea that if he can just take his opponents out one at a time he'll eventually manage to eliminate all his opponents, if 2 people casually beat the shit out of him over, and over again he'll probably take more mental damage."

"Yeah, and you want me be a center piece in that"

"If someone who's only been a devil for 6 months continually trashes him it'll hit him harder than it would from a more experienced devil, and considering the fact that you're a complete monster that shouldn't be too hard for you."

"I'm not a monster"

"You managed to have the highest reaction time in SAO despite it being populated with a fair few creatures beyond humanity who naturally have reactions times surpassing common sense, even before becoming a devil enhanced it you basically had bullet time Kii-bou."

"That's…"

"Your reaction time was .04 seconds, that's nearly 3 times faster than what was supposed to be the human biological limit Kii-bou, and now that you've become a devil it probably got even faster."

"I… whatever, anyway so we have until about a month after the next school years starts up to reach a level where we can beat the crap out of Riser and his entire peerage."

"You're taking this quite well, most people freak out after they're first reincarnated."

"I felt different the moment I woke up, then with the wing thing and the fact that I know I died means what you're telling me is the truth. After SAO and some of the other shit I had to deal with even this isn't enough to throw me off balance anymore."

"What monstrous adaptive ability"

"Damn it Argo, Will you quit it with that!"

"Now, Now, Kii-bou that's no way to speak to your master, although I don't mind it in private you should still call me Marchosias-sama in public you know" Said devil turned information dealer said cheerily

The Kii-bou in question just gave her a deadpan look before conceding "This is going to get old really fast, but if it's only in public I guess I can deal with it Marchosias-sama." He paused for a moment and then continued "I don't suppose I can convince you not to call me Kii-bou in public can I?" the former beater asked hopefully

"Meh, it'll come and go" Argo replied noncommittally.

"Marchosias-sama it would look bad for your reputation if you referred to a mere servant in such a familiar manner" Kirito spoke in a perfectly subservient manner.

Argo twitched "you only have to do that in public Kii-bou"

"But Marchosias-sama, a mere servant such as myself wouldn't dare act so familiar to your eminent self" Kirito spoke again his tone easily meeting the standards of a high-class butler.

"Okay fine, I'll just call you Kirito when we're with supernatural beings we don't know well okay, just cut it out with the overly respectful stuff in private Kii-bou, I get enough of that as it is" Argo admitted her loss.

Kirito smiled "sure thing Argo, although my real name is Kazuto you know" He noted.

Argo snorted and replied "heh, no it's not"

Kirito blinked "what does that mean?"

"Well I felt it would be too much of a pain so with a touch of memory magic and the power of technology I changed your name to Kirito Kirigaya, with Kazuto being your nickname" Argo explained "all your relatives and everyone who knows you now believe Kirito has been your name since birth" she said casually.

Kirito blinked "okay the fuck Argo, seriously?" Kirito Kirigaya, formerly Kazuto Kirigaya, deadpanned.

"Yep, although memories of events can be a pain to change something like a name is pretty easy to change actually."

After a moment Kirito got up and moved towards his computer booting it up without another word.

"What are you doing" Argo asked curiously

"Hacking the national registry" Kirito replied easily as his computer booted up "easiest way to figure out if you're telling the truth or not"

Argo blinked, "okay even for me it sounds weird for someone to say that's the easiest method. That has national grade security, you know."

As Argo watched Kirito spoke easily into his headset "hey sweetheart could you be a dear and hack the national registry for daddy?"

"Sure thing papa" a voice replied over the speakers as a young fairy with black hair and eyes appeared on one of the 3 monitors hooked up to Kirito's computer "just give me a second."

Argo blinked "ah so that's the AI you met on the lower floors, the system history said she got deleted though."

"I used Yui's remaining admin access to convert her files into an item temporarily before rebuilding her later once we got out of SAO." Kirito explained "Yui came up with the idea that an AI might be able to hack into the remaining 300 nerve gears even if a human couldn't so she's being developing programming to hack basically anything," he continued easily "short of security at the level of a nuclear missile silo she can tear through fire walls like they aren't even there, that's actually how I managed to forcibly log out the remaining 300 players, yourself included, trapped in Alfhiem although I had to get Yui to an access point first."

Argo sweat dropped "Seriously, you're saying that your AI daughter can basically hack anything less secure than a nuclear missile silo?"

"No" Kirito refuted distractedly

"Oh well I was going to say-" Argo began sounding slightly relieved

"She could hack those too, it would just take her a few hours and there'd be a 50-50 chance of her getting caught and traced back here" Kirito finished causally as he examined his person information on the national registry that Yui had brought up for him "well shit, you actually changed my name! That's pretty ridiculous, devils really don't need to follow common sense do they."

Argo just stared at him for a moment "I don't want to hear that from you" she deadpanned "any way yeah, your name's Kirito now so just deal with it."

Kirito paused for a moment frowning "I guess it's since I lived by it for like 2 and a half years but I don't really care as a much as I thought I would."

"well moving on, I mesmerized your family to think you're going on a long term live-in cram school for the rest of this school year and most of summer break to help you catch up on what you missed while you were trapped in SAO, so we're going to be going to my private villa for a training montage" Argo stated easily.

"Speaking of which how strong are you anyway?" Kirito asked "I mean I know you've done nothing in terms of training for like 3 years during the SAO and Alfhiem online incidents and all but how strong are you."

Argo suddenly looked a strange cross between angry and embarrassed before speaking "I'm probably only at the level of an above average mid-class devil at the moment" she said sounding spiteful "my family doesn't have any special innate powers, but we do have our own unique fighting style and a bunch of special techniques, if I was allowed to learn them I could probably trash Riser by myself."

"What do you mean if you were allowed?" Kirito asked

"This whole engagement thing is something my parents put forth, when I resisted it on top of giving me the time limit for a match against Riser to make the final decision they also told me they wouldn't teach me any of our family's techniques until I agreed or otherwise had my match against Riser" She explained frowning "if it was the me now i could have probably dealt with it somehow without it degrading to this point but they set the whole thing in motion when i was like 8.

"Okay so we just got to keep it simple then, judging by what you've told me of him, Riser probably hasn't trained a day in his life so with 6 months of intense training we might be able to catch up." Kirito decided.

"You do know I'm the master here right? I'm supposed to make the decisions" she complained even as Kirito ignored her.

"You said that large part of a devil's physical ability is mental and since my mentality can already access beyond human strength due to my time in SAO" he spoke reaching over and lifting up his entire bed with one hand to prove his point "I should probably focus on my basic stats rather than magic, from what you told me Riser's queen possesses primarily area-of-effect magic attacks so the best way to not get hit is to stay in super close combat with the rest of Riser's peerage until I down them and then rush her with some fancy flying" Kirito mused to himself.

"Yeah that would probably work, Yubelluna is a bit of a bitch but from what I've gathered she cares enough about the other members of Riser's peerage that she would avoid blowing them up just to get at you" Argo agreed unconsciously before blinking. "Hey did you not hear me? I'm the master here I should be the one coming up with the strategies" she complained as Kirito once again ignored her "Kii-bou! Kii-booouu!" she whined

"As for you" Kirito glanced at Argo "if you intend to keep using claws you should probably focus on your speed and evasion rather than weapon techniques and when the time comes continually attack Riser's eyes with relatively straightforward and visible attacks" He advised. "even if they heal, that split second of blindness mixed with the trauma that would be developed with having one's eyes cut out constantly should be enough to deal some serious psychological damage, especially if we can get him to associate that with your claws."

"Ooh, that's good" Argo agreed completely forgetting her earlier complaints "I especially like the part when I claw his eyes out" she complemented.

"So were going to the villa tomorrow so you should get back to the place you're renting and get some sleep, we've got intensive training to do starting tomorrow, am I clear?" Kirito commanded easily.

"crystal" Argo agreed seemingly oblivious to the shift in the conversation "I'll head back now" she said heading towards the door out of Kirito's room before freezing "hhhheeeeeeyyy" she complained "I'm the master! Why are you acting like I'm your servant!" she whined.

"I don't know, why are you acting like I'm the master?" Kirito shot back easily "Seriously you make it way too easy for me to do that."

"It's not my fault Mr. Guild Master" she complained "you and your annoyingly overwhelming commanding aura has brainwashed me, and the rest of the guild for that matter, into basically following your orders by reflex" Argo accused.

"Your exaggerating, it's not like I was doing anything besides giving out orders during raids back then you know" Kirito replied rejecting her claim without a second thought.

"haa, whatever" Argo gave up "I'm going to enjoy beating the crap out of you for the next 6 months in training," she stated causally "I mean even with you being you there's no way you can close the gap between 2 whole classifications and whatever progress I make in 6 months after all."


4 months later

"You have got to be fucking kidding me!" Argo complained dashing to the side with speed easily on par with that of a high class devil only to have her arm gripped and yanked forward, sending her flying into the outside wall of her villa's training field.

Her opponent, who moved with speed just above Argo's own, simply grinned at her "I had a bit of a break through with the belief aspect of my physical abilities last night," He said cheerily "I hate to say it Marchosias-sama, but it looks like I've surpassed you" he finished cheekily.

"Monster" Argo complained

Kirito twitched "I said stop it with that!" he complained

"Stop with what? Monster-kun" Argo teased recovering like she hadn't just been thrown at a wall at breakneck (for a human anyway) speeds "I mean seriously, reaching the level of a high class devil barely 4 months after being reincarnated despite possessing no sacred gear, really is something only a monster could accomplish ya know, even with a queen piece"

Since entering the underworld 4 months ago and entering Argo's private villa (nearly devoid of servants as a result of yet another of her parents attempts to get her to accept her marriage with Riser) Kirito had grown at a downright terrify rate. Without the restrictions of having to level up to get stronger and motivated by his desire to help his friend and master escape from a fate she so desperately wanted to avoid Kirito had trained nonstop for the last 4 months. Were it not for his new devil physiology he would have probably died from sleep deprivation somewhere during week 2 and as it was he only got 1 or 2 hours of sleep a day, relying on his impressive reserves of demonic energy to keep his body and mind in peak condition.

In response to Argo's teasing Kirito suddenly smiled demonically "Of course since a good portion of Riser's peerage use weapons we should make sure you have the proper movements to dodge and defend against say, long swords for example." He smile stretched a bit more "since you so kindly acquired a proper set of blades for me recently it would be a good idea for me to get used to wielding my new blades at the same time as you getting some experience dealing with weapon users."

Argo paled "N-now there's no need to be hasty my stats are all at least in the bottom of the high-class level, even Riser's Queen won't be able to match me in regards to that." She stuttered 'shit, shit don't go into drill sergeant mode, whatever happens please god *ouch* don't let him go into drill sergeant mode.' She prayed internally ignoring the small spike of pain she received for it.

"That's no reason to be careless" the aura around Kirito thickened, the fact that it was genuine demonic energy rather than an illusion created via killing intent doing nothing to allay Argo's fears, "after all, Marchosias-sama said herself that she wants to avoid that marriage to the extent that she would 'go through any training, no matter how torturous and cruel' in order to get strong enough to cancel the marriage" he said taking a step towards her drawing the until then sheathed swords ominously.

Without a second of hesitation Argo bolted "Kii-booouuu! What the hell, stop iitt! I'm supposed to be the master Kii-bou! Kii-boooouuu!" Her yells retreated into the distance as Kirito chased her relentlessly through the woods just outside Argo's villa.


Later on inside Argo's villa

After around 4 hours of being chased around by Kirito and his 2 long swords Argo felt vaguely bad for any sword wielding opponent she, and Kirito for that matter, faced in the future. The simple fact was that any swordsman (or woman) she faced in the future that was below high-class in power might as well not be there anymore. Having dealt with and, she acknowledged with a degree of despair, the fact that that she will likely to have to continue to deal with, Kirito 'training' with her meant that all other sword wielding foes would probably eventually just be cannon fodder by comparison.

On the other hand Kirito's dual wielding skills had grown even more overwhelmingly deadly with his insane reflexes being enhanced even further on top of the fact that he had figured out how to coat his swords in demonic energy to emulate the positive aspects of sword-skills without the cool-down times. As a result of the increased power provided by his recreated sword skill system Kirito had gained the ability to cut through all but the most sturdily crafted magic swords with ease. His strength and speed had already far eclipsed the amount he had possessed in SAO and his durability was even more nonsensical, disregarding holy weapons no one with power below a solid mid-class devil could so much as scratch him.

He currently wielded pair of custom made high quality magic swords with a minor demonic attribute imbued into both to give them a bit of extra kick. When Argo was writing the request for a custom order for various weapons and armor she'd had Kirito list what he wanted for his weapons. Since the general rule for weapons was the more enchantments place on a weapon had the less potent each individual enchantment would be Argo had advised him to only select a handful in addition to the demonic attribute. Kirito had, rather predictably, completely ignored most of the fancier enchantments instead selecting high tiered enchantments for durability, sharpness, and heat resistance along with 2 slightly more magic sword like attributes in the form of an enchantment that allowed Kirito to easily channel demonic energy into the blades in addition to one that allowed him to ignore physics by letting him temporarily change the mass of the blades.

Even an average enchanter would be able to imbue a high quality weapon with such simple enchantments with good results and Argo wasn't taking chances with an average enchanter, no she went with a top of the line scarily skilled one with a massive price tag. Of course that sum would only be viewed as being at the level of expensive for an heiress to one of the 72 pillars, well if said heiress wasn't almost completely cut off from her families' funds that is. She had initially been expecting to have to struggle to get enough money to pay for Kirito's swords and her claws and not have enough money left for anything else after than but, in a stroke of genius, Kirito came up with an idea that he still felt vaguely guilty about and money quickly proved to not be a problem. The idea that Kirito had proposed was one the 2 of them had decided to carry out solemnly (or not so solemnly in Argo's case).

So it was that nearly 4 months ago, around a week and a half after Kirito had been resurrected as a devil, they had, with heavy hearts and an apology to day traders and investors everywhere (well, Kirito had, anyway), unleashed Yui on the stock market. Barely 2 weeks later and the $3,000,000 startup fund Argo had provided had bloated into around 97.3 million dollars and continued to grow at a mind numbing pace. As the world's most advanced AI Yui had the capacity to monitor businesses and shifts in the market with a speed and accuracy that completely eclipsed everything else in the modern world allowing her to predict and react to said shifts perfectly. Suffice to say they no longer had any troubles with funding and Argo had decided to spend enough money to buy a few islands to get both of them top of the line weapons and gear that was better than anything short of legendary grade equipment .

Since both of them favored lighter armor Argo eventually ended up putting down nearly 200 million dollars in order to get 2 custom sets of heavily enchanted dragon-hide armor. Even at its bulkiest point the armor wasn't more than 2 centimeters thick and included an enchantment that allowed the armor to transform into regular, albeit nearly indestructible, clothes when necessary. Argo had also included a trench coat and a hooded cloak for Kirito and herself respectively in the set something Kirito had appreciated immensely, especially considering that both could also take the shape of a hoodie on command.

After this she also bought hundreds of books on magic, combat techniques, auxiliary techniques, and a dozen other topics. If something could be useful even in the slightest she bought it and as a result she quickly filled her villa's previously empty library. She'd also ended up hiring a couple of natural born low class devils to partially fill the positions in her villa emptied by her parents going from a grand total of 2 servants all the way up to 13. Granted the villa was still technically understaffed having possessed nearly 100 servants prior to her parents trying to pressure her but it was start.

On a side note even with careless spending to the extent that it would make even members of the 72 pillars flinch Yui had still managed to bring the amount of money they had at their disposal to around 12 billion dollars at which point Kirito had told her to just sustain the account at around that level. Argo was well aware that part of the reason behind this was that Kirito was slightly afraid at how Asuna and the others would react if they were to be resurrected only to find out that Kirito, Yui, and through them Argo, had basically become the Illuminati and as such had decided to stop the growth of his assets before they reached the realm of insanity.

Argo had been slightly disappointed; even if it wouldn't mean much in the supernatural world she still felt it would be amazing to economically control the world. Disregarding the fact that Argo had been intending to try and bankrupt the church systems of all denominations of Christianity because she thought it would be funny, Kirito had found plenty of other reasons to stop his master from attaining economic domination of the non-supernatural world, much to her consternation.

To Argo, Kirito's power was nothing short of monstrous for someone who had been a devil for less than half a year, aside from his physical abilities he possessed reserves of demonic energy than dwarfed her own, admittedly slightly below average for a high class devil, reserves. Argo had no doubt that Kirito was already at the level at which he could single handedly curb stomp Riser's entire peerage, Riser included, in less than an hour. Argo found herself in the interesting situation of not being worried about her would be forced marriage because she was well aware that her badass of a crush (who was far too dense to notice) would be capable of casually curb stomping her would-be husband.

"Ria-chi is going to be soo~ jealous" Argo giggled to herself as she relaxed in her room, finding the distant sounds of Kirito training like the training nut he was strangely calming as she was gently ushered towards sleep.


1 month later

"Seriously?"

"Yep"

"I died, became a devil, gained enough power to easily destroy a mid-sized city, not to mention more money than I could ever spend and yet I still have to go to school? Seriously the hell is that?"

"Well it's not like I don't get where you're coming from Kii-bou but it's not like we've got anything else to do."

"Well can't really argue with you there, I guess, it is getting pretty boring training for a fight against a foe that I can apparently already smash into the ground." Kirito admitted shrugging slightly.

"Well that and I've taken the liberty of having Asuna, Sinon, Silica, Lizbeth, and Yuuki invited to the same school we will be attending. That said, since they're a bit behind in terms of their educations the remedial courses they're taking won't end until shortly after our match with Riser. They should transfer in about a week after the match at which point I'll recruit them. Of course even if they showed up earlier I probably wouldn't recruit them earlier, mostly because it'll be worse for Riser to lose against two people rather than 7" Kirito's master admitted displaying a semi-sadistic grin as she did so "that's the kind of humiliating loss that'll follow him for decades."

"Wow Argo, I can't believe you're a devil, with such prevailing benevolence one would think you were an angel." Kirito quickly shot out a tsukkomi

"I know right? I'm so forgiving too" Argo agreed easily her expression displaying almost sickening innocence as she did so.

Kirito just deadpanned and shook his head "whatever, anyway what's the name of the school we'll be attending?"

"Kuoh academy" his master responded easily "it's the same school that both Rias Gremory and Sona Sitri are attending. Since the whole town is considered Ria-chi's territory it should be fairly safe, and with the school being backed directly by the Gremory clan it's incredibly high quality for how expensive it is."

"Safety and high level schooling? Shit that sounds terrible" Kirito complained lazily "can't we go somewhere at least slightly exciting with only an above average school system so I can get straight A's without putting any effort in?"

"Shut up you damned fight junky of a child genius" Argo unleashed her own Tsukkomi with lightning speed "anyway, we'll be entering as 2nd year students while Ria-chi will be in her 3rd and final year."

"Okay, how big is the school anyway?" Kirito asked lazily.

"it's fairly big although since it was an all-girls school until just a few years ago there's-" Argo suddenly stopped talking a shocked expression on her face "shit that's right, since there's so many girls there Kii-bou will probably end up getting dragged down the harem route too early!" she shouted as if some horrible future had already been set in stone.

Kirito twitched "Just what the hell kind of person do you think I am?"

"A genius bishounen with an EX-ranked Harem Aura skill that automatically seduces around 80% of the main and side female characters along with roughly 95% of the random background girls that populate the area to make the setting more lifelike" Argo stated in a matter of fact voice "of course if you don't actually interact with said girls the rate drops to around 40%"

Kirito just froze staring at his master before he let his head drop, causing his hair to cover his eyes with a dark shadow.

Argo blinked looking around "was the room always this dark?" she asked nervously "and for that matter why are there random wisps of demonic energy floating everywhere" she continued frightfully looking towards Kirito.

"Why Marchosias-sama" Kirito began his voice somehow simultaneously respectful and soul chillingly terrifying "I didn't realize you had so much energy that such stupid fantasies were running through your head" he continued his entire body now sheathed in a dark aura of demonic energy as he took a single step towards his master.

Argo started laughing nervously "hahahha, now come on Kii-bou I was just joking you know, you don't have to take everything so seriously" she replied taking a step back.

"Now Marchosias-sama," Kirito continued taking a step forward and summoning one of his blades from it's dimensional storage, a trick he'd picked up 2 weeks ago, "as your humble servant it's my duty to ensure that you aren't so high strung that you do something foolish in public, so please allow me to help you work off that excess energy."

Argo took a step back "n-now Kii-bou that won't be necessary" Kirito took another step forward "a-as you master I command you to stop that" she said taking a step backwards.

"Stop what Marchosias-sama? Looking out for your well-being is something I'll do even if you order me not to" Kirito said while displaying a smile so demonic that it would have made the Original Lucifer proud (1) as he started to rapidly walk forward.

"Kii-bou stop it, stop it I say" Argo shouted turning and running "Kii-booouu, Kii-booooouuu stop it, I'm the master damn it so listen to meeeee!" She yelled as she started running full speed away from her pursuing queen.

It should be noted that none of the 13 staff members present in Argo's villa even reacted to the sight of the mousy high class devil being chased by her apparently blood thirsty servant simply because it had become an everyday sight at this point. Most of them had eventually come to the conclusion that despite him technically being a servant Kirito was actually the one in control of that relationship. Incidentally they were completely correct as, unbeknownst to the 2 in question, Argo and Kirito's 'master-servant' relationship had quickly grown to show great similarities to that of the current Lucifer and his queen, albeit with the genders of the king and queen swapped.


"So remind me again why we're transferring in a week after school started rather than enrolling normally?" Kirito asked bracing himself for a response that would doubtlessly result in the birth of a headache as he walked alongside Argo towards his new school.

"Well firstly school orientation days are stupidly boring and secondly being transferred in is more dramatic and attention grabbing." Argo explained easily "it's a more main-character-like entry to a new school."

Kirito twitched once and then sighed "whatever" he responded instantly giving up "so based on my schedule you've put us in all the exact same classes." He deadpanned

Argo nodded "Well of course," she agreed as if it was the most obvious thing in the world "if I routinely let you out of my sight for long periods of time in a school with this many girls you'd probably inadvertently seduce at least half of the girls you come in contact with" she continued "with my efforts I hope to drop the number of victims to only a tenth of the girls at Kuoh" She explained in a tone akin to a scientist reporting their progress on curing an infectious disease.

A strained expression on his face Kirito turned to his friend and spoke "Seriously? And what the hell do you mean by victims?" he complained

Argo simply grinned and then proceeded to change the subject "Looks like were here" she said cheerily as they turned the corner "Oh and remember while were here my name is Argo Råttadjävulen while we're here rather than Argo Marchosias" She finished in a careless voice despite the numerous other students walking directly next to them.

Kirito just started at her looking stunned before responding in an annoyed tone "Really? That's just the words for rat and devil in Swedish put together, is that really the best fake name you could come up with?" he demanded also ignoring the crowds of students around them.

Argo shrugged "well Ria-tan's my childhood friend, although I haven't seen her in forever, and since she said she was from Scandinavia I decided to just go with it. I mean really, even if someone notices it's not like they're going to realize that I'm actually a devil" She said easily

"True" Kirito admitted

"Also" Argo began looking around at the surrounding students who hadn't so much as given them a strange look "this barrier spell you made that makes it so everything we say and most of what we do can't be perceived by people with magic reserves below a certain level is really convenient."

"I know right?" Kirito grinned as they entered the front gate of the school "as it turns out magic is a lot like programming, so it's not really that hard for me despite the fact that I only started working on it last month. While the belief-based system used by devils is great for raw power, the system used primarily by human mages is a lot better in terms of technique and subtly" He said grinning "This glyph-based system is way better than the language-based one in Alfhiem online."

Argo shook her head before musing wistfully "I remember the days when I was the experienced devil with strength leagues beyond yours and you were a freshly reincarnated and nearly defenseless devil." She sighed "then about 2 weeks passed and I realized you were already at the top level of the low class devil spectrum and that I to step it up or else you'd surpass me, which you then proceeded to do anyway."

Kirito snorted "Once we kick Risers ass you'll get access to your families' special techniques" he said "you know, the super awesome ones you described that only your family can use due to the super-secret ritual required to prepare your body for it, y'know those techniques? If even half of what you've told about those techniques is true you'll probably catch up sooner or later."

"Meh maybe" she paused for a moment "also, and I probably also I should have mentioned it earlier, but don't tell anyone I told you as much as I did about them, my parents might try and have you killed or something" She said offhandedly.

Kirito's somewhat amused looked disappeared as he look at his friend and master "If it's a secret to the degree of killing someone if they learned about it then why the hell did you even tell me?" he complained lightly.

"Well it's not like you're going to use that information against me or anything so I don't think it really matters if you know or not," Argo admitted shrugging "as such I don't particularly have any filter on the things I talk about when it's just the two of us."

Kirito gave her a deadpanned look "I noticed" he said as they approached the office to pick up their official class schedules, as in ones that weren't acquired unofficially before via their status as devils in a devil run school.

Argo frowned slightly "why do I get the feeling we're not talking about the same thing anymore?" she accused.

"I don't know what you're talking about" Kirito refuted "after all I'm in complete agreement about your utter lack of a mental filter".

"Oh shut up Kii-bou" she shot back before approaching the staff member in the office as Kirito swiftly dropped his barrier spell.

"Hello~" Argo greeted the staff member energetically "I'm Argo Råttadjävulen and this is my close friend Kirito Kirigaya we're here to pick up our class schedules." Her tone had changed swiftly from her normal calculating yet mischievous and teasing one to a bubbly, warm and seemingly universally friendly one as if someone had flipped a switch.

That being said Kirito…

"Hello, sorry about her she's just a bit excited about going to a new school" Kirito apologized, smiling gently to the receptionist who seemed a bit overwhelmed by Argo's overly cheerful tone.

…Had changed just as sharply, his laid-back and somewhat snarky attitude having apparently vanished along with his barrier.

The staff member quickly recovered "it's nice to see someone so excited about school, here's your schedules" she said smiling.

Kirito dipped his head politely "Thanks"

"Thanks!" Argo chirped energetically before grabbing Kirito's arm, pressing it against her chest and dragging him out of the office "come on Kii-bou let's get going already!"

The receptionist just smiled lightly as she watched the black haired boy get dragged away by his overly energetic friend "What good kids," she said shaking her head as they left.


Kirito swiftly recast the barrier spell and instantly commented "I thought you agreed you wouldn't call me Kii-bou in public, Marchosias-sama?"

"now, now Kii-bou I only agreed to do so in the presence of supernatural beings that we don't know personally, meaning that when we're at school or with people I do know it's completely fair game~" she teased.

Kirito just sighed tiredly "Is it really that hard to call me my actual name Argo?"

"Not really, but I think it's more personal to use a nickname" she admitted.

"Whatever" he conceded as they approached their classroom and Kirito once again dropped his barrier lazily.


"We have 2 new students today" the teacher began only to be interrupted by a bunch of chatter.

A trio of males in the class began fearlessly displaying their peerless perversity once again.

"I hope they're cute girls" a bald ex-jock cried out shamelessly crediting his title as the perverted badly.

"With big breasts too!" a more… direct… preference was shouted out by one Issei Hyoudou aka the Oppai baka

"We'll soon know for sure," the 3rd and final member of the infamous perverted trio stated, pushing up his glasses with one finger and causing them to glint dramatically "No stats can hide from my sight, 3 sizes here we come" finished the one known as the 3-sizes scouter

"Disgusting" a cold comment came from the girl's side.

"I can't believe they even allow them in this school" yet another girl called out ruthlessly.

"Those perverted idiots really are completely worthless aren't they?" a third girl asked rhetorically.

Once the chattering had calmed down the teacher cleared his throat and then spoke "one of the students is a girl and the other is a boy so please greet both of them kindly." He then turned to the door "You can come in now you two."

At his words a cute, somewhat mousy looking girl dragged in an amused looking boy with black hair.

"Hey everybody!" said girl cheered excitably finally letting go of Kirito's arm "My name is Argo Råttadjävulen, my last name's a terrible mouthful so don't worry if you can't remember it!" she chirped "I was born in Scandinavia and only moved here around five years ago but I'm confident in my Japanese!

Kirito shook his slightly, a small smile on his face before he spoke "My name's Kirito Kirigaya, nice to meet you, I was born here in Japan and hope to get along with everyone".

Unfortunately for the black haired devil the gentle smile on his face combined with his high grade bishonen appearance almost instantly made almost all the girls blush and, conversely, all the boys rage internally.

"Does anyone have any questions?" the teacher spoke tiredly well aware of the oncoming response.

"Argo was dragging you along pretty familiarly" a girl named Kiryuu called out "are you dating or something?" she said in a somewhat lewd tone.

Argo blushed before answering for him "n-no, but we've been close friends for a few years now, although I…" she trailed off blushing harder.

Kirito, oblivious to the fact that the blush wasn't entirely faked, looked at her with a raised eyebrow "you what?" he said curiously.

"N-nothing" she denied causing Kirito to sweat drop.

'She's getting way too into this character' he deadpanned internally; completely (and incorrectly) convinced the whole thing was an act.

"Oh ho ho!" the other girl, Kiryuu, called out knowingly "well then let's see your prospects for the future then~" as she finished her sentence her glasses glinted strangely and her grin grew.

"Why do I suddenly feel like I'm being sexually harassed" Kirito said frowning slightly

"Who knows" Kiryuu responded "anyway I'd say you're about 7 ½ maybe 8 inches or so, quite impressive, especially considering your somewhat girly face."

Kirito blinked looking confused for a second as most of the girls in the classroom started blushing and the boys began despairing "Wait what?" Kirito asked, completely out of the loop


After the class had recovered and promptly ignored Kirito's questioning glances (the boys because they refused to help a goddamn pretty boy and the girls because they thought his slightly confused look was adorable) the questioning continued much in the same way as it had started.

"Argo where are you staying right now?" someone asked

"Ah since we both don't have homes around here Kirito and I are renting an apartment around here" Argo answered with obviously false innocence (to Kirito anyway), her unfortunately accurate answer only served to fan the flame that was the male student's new found hatred for the selectively clueless black haired devil.


"Why the hell did you come here you goddamn pretty boy!" a random boy yelled at Kirito who looked perplexed but was saved the trouble of answering when a girl stood up and promptly slammed the questioners head into his own desk shutting him up. Kirito waited a moment before raising an eyebrow at the teacher's complete lack of a response to the blatant assault before shrugging and setting it aside.


"We have another student from Scandinavia here you know" a girl informed Argo cheerfully and was about to continue before Argo bubbled cheerfully

"That's Ria-tan right? She's actually my childhood friend, although I haven't seen her in forever, it's actually the reason we decided to go to this school"

"We?" Kiryuu asked knowingly

"a-ah W-well Kii-bou said he didn't really care which school he went to all that much so we both decided to go here" she admitted shyly

"Kii-bou is it?" Kiryuu asked, grinning a disgusting grin

"Ah Kirito I mean" she said blushing slightly as Kirito internally despaired.

'You lose if you let it get to you, you lose if you let it get to you' said despairing devil chanted in his mind.


"Do you have any hobbies?" a random girl asked

"Ah yeah, well I've done a few things, while I enjoy gaming I also do martial arts and kendo actually" he admitted.

"Really?" one of the girls said excitedly "We have a kendo club in school, do you want to join?"

Kirito raised his eyebrow in thought "I would, although I have some other stuff going on right now including a part time job of sorts, so I probably won't be able to unfortunately."

The girl looked somewhat disappointed by his answer "well if that's the case it can't be helped"

"Well it's not like its everyday but it's often enough that I'm probably not going to be joining any sports clubs this year, although I might end up joining a club without a compulsory daily attendance" Kirito explained apologetically.

"Well if that's the case why don't you come in once and a while when you can, I could probably show you some things" she said confidently

Kirito smiled "sure, I'll try and pop in when I have the time."

Once the Question and answer session was over they sat down at their desks and class began in earnest.


"Okay now that class is out for today we can go speak to Ria-tan and Sona-tan to finalize some stuff" Argo commented "Since Ria-tan's club is just a front for her peerage were going to be joining it since it will grant us some additional freedom and whatnot from classes."

"Because hypnotizing people every ten seconds is apparently frowned upon" Kirito deadpanned at Argo "cough, cough, hint, hint."

"Look it was really important we got window seats, it's-" Argo began.

"I really don't want to hear anymore of your anime logic bullshit Argo, I really, really, don't" Kirito emphasized "so do us both a favor and don't hypnotize half our class for some inane reason next time, okay?"

Just as Argo was about to reply a new voice broke into their conversation "ah, so that's what that spike of power was earlier."

Argo looked surprised and turned around to face the person who had just interjected before her face brightened "Sona-tan!" she cheered running up and half tackling the girl "It's been so long!"

Sure enough the student council president, with 2 other people standing next to her stood in the hallway. The two others, who Kirito assumed were members of the student council president's peerage, looked surprised at the random girl who had just tackled their master.

Sona blushed and quickly became flustered "Argo I insist you get off, doing such a thing while other students are watching-" she began only to be interjected by Argo

"Don't worry about it, Kii-bou made up a spell that makes it so whatever we do won't be perceivable to the non-supernaturally aware, well within a certain limit anyway!" she chirped before back up slightly before she grinned mischievously "now let's see how you grew up in other ways" Argo hands began moving in a rather in appropriate direction before a spine chilling voice caused her to freeze shock still, saving Sona from being casually molested by the mousy girl.

"Marchosias-sama" Kirito spoke in a polite yet spine chilling manner "What exactly are you doing?"

At his words Argo, Sona, and the other 2 accompanying the latter froze before Argo was seemingly teleported several feet away from Sona "N-nothing at all Kii-bou, why?" Argo asked laughing nervously.

Kirito raised his eyebrow slightly and his terrifying presence vanished "I'm glad to hear that master" he said smiling peacefully "I mean it would be completely inappropriate for someone of your standing to casually molest one of your peers in public"

"y-yeah," Argo laughed again "t-totally inappropriate" she agreed before growing somewhat serious and looking back at Sona.

"Anyways" she said "as you already know I am attending this school, with my Queen, Mr. Tall, dark, and terrifying over there" Argo explained causing Kirito to gain a slightly twitched in his eye, although whether it was due to being referred to as a queen or Argo's other description of him only he knew "and I've arranged for a few other people I'm going to be recruiting sooner or later to attend this school although they won't be transferring in for a bit and…" she paused smiling genuinely " it's nice to see you again Sona-tan" She finished.


Having felt a spike of demonic energy a while ago Sona had gone with her Queen and newest Pawn to investigate. She already had inkling or rather a very good idea of who was responsible but she held onto the vague hope that her second childhood friend had somehow matured over the years as she walked through the halls. She turned the corner and found her hopes dashed as she caught the tail end of a comment from the tall dark haired boy who was Argo's Queen.

"So do us both a favor and don't hypnotize half our class for some inane reason next time, okay?" the dark haired boy requested.

With my suspicion confirmed I inadvertently called out "Ah, so that's what that spike of power was earlier."

At my words Argo turned around "Sona-tan!" she cried out happily "it's been so long!" then without care for location my childhood friend, rather predictably in retrospect, half-tackled me in the middle of the hallway without any hesitation.

"Argo I insist you get off, doing such a thing while other students are watching-" I began before being cut off

"Don't worry about it, Kii-bou made up a spell that makes it so whatever we do won't be perceivable to the non-supernaturally aware, well within a certain limit anyway!" Argo chirped as I realized with a start that not a single student was paying us any attention whatsoever. As I was about to resign myself to being sexually harassed by the less sane of my 2 childhood friends a chilling wave of not-quite killing intent crashed down.

It only took me a moment to identify the source as Argo jumped back nervously. After she sputtered out a denial and her Queen stopped letting out his well-controlled pressure, which I noticed with some surprise hadn't affect the normal students around us at all, she was instantly back to normal. She then continued on to finish her greeting in a less sexually invasive manner. Setting the strange relationship between Argo and her Queen aside I spoke, allowing a small smile to cross my face as i did so "It's nice to see you again as well Argo" I said genuinely to my childhood friend "that said your Queen is quite correct that hypnotizing your classmates unnecessarily isn't something I can approve of as Student Council president." I spoke deciding to trust the barrier magic set up by Argo's black haired Queen

Argo looked affronted "But Sona-tan!" she cried "everyone knows that main characters always have window seats!" Argo complained as her Queen shook his head tiredly. Well aware that the number of people who could get Argo to listen to reason was few and far between I decided to make a tactical retreat for the moment and change the subject

"While that is not a valid reason we have other things to attend to at the moment" I began "the rest of my peerage as well as Rias's are going to meet up at the old school building so we can make some introductions and set down some ground rules." I said emphasizing the last part as a stared at Argo pointedly.

Argo just smirked deviously.


(1) Get it? Lucifer proud? Pride? ba dum tsshh! Okay I'll stop now.