If I Die Young

Disclaimer: I own absolutely nothing from the Harry Potter universe. This fanfiction is written purely for entertainment purposes and nothing more, though all ideas and writing are done by me and belong to me.

A/N: I wanted to do something different and shake things up a bit. I had planned this out several years back to be a long story like my previous stories Alexandrite, Destiny, and Serendipity. But as I'm still working on Serendipity and Alexandrite and super busy, I don't intend this story to be very long. We'll see - I'm a very busy gal. I'm also writing this a little different than my other work - I constantly like to change things up and try new things.

Please review and let me know how you like this!





I'm not a girl,
Not yet a woman.
All I need is time,
A moment that is mine,
While I'm in between.

-Britney Spears

(school's out for summer)

Her parents demand to spend the summer abroad.

"One last family outing before you leave for university," Lily's mother explains, glancing at Petunia over her mid-morning strawberry mimosa with watery eyes. "It will be one of those 31 night cruises, practically all summer! We will be traveling the mediterranean. Oh, Tuney, you always wanted to see Italy, didn't you?"

Lily dares a look toward her older sister who is frowning down at her impressive fruit parfait, scraping her spoon loudly against the glass bowl. Petunia is graduating early and taking off for university at the end of the summer, getting as far away from their simple neighborhood as possible.

"When do we leave?" Lily wonders, reaching for her glass.

"Tomorrow morning."

Lily's glass of sparkling lemonade freezes halfway to her lips.

"I just got home," she breathes out.

"I thought you two would be excited," their mother says, her mossy eyes - the only physicality Lily had received from her mother —narrowing in on her daughters. "When's the last time we took a cruise?"

Lily forces a smile onto her face. "Of course we are excited— " Petunia snorts unpleasantly next to Lily and the redhead gives her sister a sidelong glare "—well, I'm excited. It's just a surprise."

"Yes, well, I happen to - what I mean to say is, your father and I—"

Petunia releases a frustrated sigh, plops her elbow rather loudly onto the freshly polished table, ignores the disapproving whispers that erupt around the country club, glares at the empty seat next to her mother.

"Where is Dad?" she accuses. "What's the point of family brunch every week if he doesn't bother to show half the time?"

"Your father had to meet with a client," she replies tartly, knocking back the remainder of her mimosa.

"It's Saturday," Petunia grates.

Lily feels her knee jerking up and down impatiently under the table.

"Yes, well, your father was called in—apparently, it was an emergency."

Lily frowns, opens her mouth.

Thinks better of it, closes it.

Decides to hell with it, opens it again.

"I think a patient threatening to kill themselves is a rather big emergency for a therapist."

"Wonderful," Petunia drawls, raking a slender hand through her thick flaxen hair. "He does realize that his clients have to stay home while we're on this vacation, right?"

Lily nibbles on her index fingernail, painted a rather loud shade of daisy yellow. Emmeline insisted she brighten her color palette because her utterly normal shades of pearly pinks and muted mauves were depressing and took away from her aura and Emmeline refused to be depressed.

"We will need new swimsuits," her mother continues, ignoring the pair of them.

Lily bites a little too hard, chips her cheery polish, draws blood.

(somewhere beyond the sea)

Her mother buys them too many bikinis with her shiny AmEx and two pairs of matching, ridiculously expensive coral earrings. Petunia waits until her mother's back is turned before promptly tossing her pair in the nearest waste basket.

Her parents can't even last one day at sea before they begin to scream at each other. Lily resumes her nail biting.

Petunia flinches while applying her mascara, throws it down on the vanity, rips her sunbathing essentials from her suitcase and into her purse. She grabs Lily roughly by the elbow and makes an effort to slam their stateroom door loudly behind them.

"Don't be stupid," she snaps at Lily as they find a pair of tanning benches and flop down on them. Petunia's nail file is loud and scratchy as she drags it along Lily's ragged fingernails, her movements rough and painful. "This vacation is a death sentence, not a salvation. Those two, trapped on boat in the middle of the ocean with nowhere to be rid of each other? They'll be divorced before we reach Greece."

Lily rips her fingers from Petunia's vice-like grip, gathers her long claret hair into a high ponytail, and brings her knees to her chest.

She doesn't want to be on this stupid trip with her materialistic mother and her always exhausted father and her angsty sister. She would give anything to be back in England.

She misses Hogwarts, misses partnering with Sev in Potions, misses Emmeline's daily horoscope readings from Witch Weekly, misses Mary's fretting over which shade of lipstick might impress Sirius Black.

Hell, she even misses Sirius Black.

But she doesn't miss James Potter or his ridiculously chaotic hair or his inappropriate jokes at the breakfast table or his annoying habit of thinking he's a regular Adonis —

And suddenly, she's happy to be as far away from Hogwarts as possible.

(it's a cruel, cruel sumer)

The summer passes painfully, like pulling teeth.

Lily's father buys her a camera in Cannes after another row with her mother. In Barcelona, Lily ditches her family during a tour of a Spanish basilica, wanders the busy streets until she finds a small shop. She purchases a photo album to house her camera's memorabilia. She falls in step with her family as they are leaving the basilica and Petunia glowers at her as she expertly slides her new purchase into her backpack.

"How'd you enjoy that, sweet pea?" wonders her father, sliding his sunglasses off his flop of strawberry hair and onto the bridge of his nose.

He hadn't even noticed she'd been gone.

"Mm, it was beautiful," Lily replies easily.

Petunia's lips peel back over her gritted teeth. "Yes, what was your favorite part?"

Lily shrugs. "The rich history and all that."

But their parents are too busy arguing over which cafe to eat at.

In Sicily, her father diagnoses Petunia's worsening sour apple attitude as a transitional crisis leading up to her leaving for university. He gives her a glittery mermaid green journal to process her feelings.

"Bloody therapist, my arse," she seethes later in their stateroom, dumping the diary onto her bed. "He can't even see what's going on in his own family."

When Lily wonders how she's doing, suggests that maybe she should give the journal a shot, maybe it could help, Petunia chucks the decorative journal at her head. Instead, Petunia processes her feelings with Antonio, Milos, and Luca.

Lily writes compulsively, every detail. She even reads ahead for her upcoming school year.

(tell me, baby girl)

They make it to Greece without their parent's getting a divorce. When they dock in Mykonos, Lily angrily raps on the bathroom door for the fifth time in an hour.

"Petunia, what the hell is taking you so damn long? We are supposed to meet Mum and Dad for breakfast."

Petunia whips open the door and shoves an object in Lily's face. A bright pink double lined sign flashes in her face.

"Petunia," Lily breathes out.

"Lily," she spits out.

Lily blinks, attempts to speak, furrows her brow.

"It's positive," Petunia whispers. "It's—I'm pregnant."

She laughs hollowly. "You think if we tell them they are going to be grandparents, it will make them stay together?"

For the first time in three years, Petunia allows Lily to hug her.

(bump in the road)

They don't stay together.

On the last day of the trip, their fighting stops and Lily peers at Petunia over the cover of her textbook. The sisters share a knowing glance when there's a knock on the door and their parents step into their room.

"—too different—"

"—working all the time—"

"—spending problem—"

"—depression is worsening—"

"—don't love each other anymore—"

In tears, Lily's mother turns and exits the room.

"I hate you," Petunia hisses at her father. "I know you've been cheating on her with your client. I've known for the last six months."


"What?" Lily gasps, staring between them. She looks to her father and he looks so disappointed and dead she just can't bear to anymore. "You were cheating?"

"You are a therapist, can't you cure her depression?" Petunia continues crossly.

"Your mother is seriously ill—"

"Why is it so easy for you to give up on her?" demands Petunia. "Instead of spending so much time at work with your lunatic whore you should be fixing her and you should be working things out!"

"I've done everything I can," her father erupted. "I stopped the affair three months ago, Tuney! I came clean. We've been to marriage counseling all year. We aren't happy with each other anymore and it's time to go our separate ways."

"You are going to kill her," Petunia sobs, beating at his chest. "She's not strong enough. Where will she go?"

"She's agreed to get help," her father explains. "She's checking into a hospital when we return home. That was her choice. The separation will be good for us; she can focus on herself and getting better."

Lily's fingernails are bleeding again.

On their flight home, Petunia begins to complain about cramping. She tells Lily she's been bleeding off and on for five days. Lily stubbornly puts her foot down, sets up an appointment for her sister with their family doctor. It's the closest they've been since she left for Hogwarts her first year.

"I lost the baby," Petunia declares after her appointment. "I lost my mother and I lost my baby. It's my fault—I didn't know if I even wanted it, what with me being so young and not knowing the father and starting university—"

"Tuney, I'm so sorry," Lily sympathizes, reaching for her sister's hand.

"Dont," she says harshly, coldly. "What good are you? You're leaving me, too."

Lily glances at the calendar on her wall. She returns to school soon.

She doesn't know what to say and can already feel her sister slipping away from her.

She wonders if Petunia will ever want to be her friend again.

(here comes the sun)

"—and then he told me I looked pretty, can you believe it?" Mary squeals, jumping up and down in the crowd. "Emmeline, are you paying attention? Do you see him?"

"Nope," the tall Hufflepuff responds, scanning the Gryffindor section of the Quidditch pitch for Sirius Black. "First game of the season. I'm so excited!"

A gust of warm wind swats Emmeline's waist long strawberry blonde hair into Lily's mouth. She coughs, jerking out of the way. Emmeline readjust the flower wreath atop her head, silently apologizing to Lily with her wide gray-blue eyes.

"Can we just find a seat already?" Lily complains. "The Ravenclaw team is already flying out which means the game should be starting any second now."

Mary pointedly ignores Lily as she usually does. Mary MacDonald, who uses her father's reputation and her mother's generous cosmetic line to get attention and make friends, doesn't particularly like the out-spoken, simple-fashioned gusto that Lily harbors. She merely tolerates her presence because of their mutual friend, Emmeline.

"Emmy, what does my love horoscope predict for this month?" Mary wonders, plopping down on a nearby bench.

She pulls out her compact mirror and applies another layer of fuchsia lipgloss to her bowtie lips.

"I have a feeling he's going to kiss me soon and I need to prepare myself."

"Oh, please," Lily mutters, chuckling.

Emmeline glances at Lily with a smirk. "Play nicely, Lily. Unkind thoughts can muddy your chakras."

Just then, something hits Lily's back. She turns around, sweeping her long red hair out of the way and notices that someone's struck her with this month's edition of Witch Weekly.

Sirius Black snickers loudly a few seats up from her. Beside him Remus Lupin sits with a lazy smile on his face. He shrugs apologetically at Lily. Peter Pettigrew laughs nervously next to Remus. She's been lucky to avoid them since she's been back, until now.

"Found your boyfriend," Lily informs Mary, annoyed. "And once again, he's being a total pain in the arse."

"Oh, Lily," Emmeline admonishes, shaking her head as Mary gasps in disgrace.

"What the hell, Black?" Lily snips, brandishing the magazine like a weapon.

Sirius cackles and then winks at her and she prepares herself for another well-thought-out jibe. "I just thought you might want to send a photo of yourself to the staff of the magazine, Evans. Summer was good to you, very good. I wouldn't mind hanging your face on my wall at night."

Lily balks, then grimaces, blanching.

"Uh, gross," she scoffs, chucking the magazine at his face. He ducks precisely at the right time and the magazine snaps into Kiera Hawkin's nose. "Oh, Merlin! Sorry, Kiera!"

"Nice arm!" Peter compliments on her aim.

Lily smiles at him, still slightly annoyed but flattered all the same. Meanwhile, Mary is pouting, glaring at Lily with ferocity. She's about to say something snide, Lily imagines, when the student body roars with excitement. She suspects that the Gryffindor team has made their way onto the pitch.

"Where's your egotistical leader?" Lily shouts up at Sirius, not because she's curious or wants to see him or anything but because she doesn't want another magazine incident taking her by surprise.

Sirius juts his head in the direction of the pitch. "Number 17."

She squints and finds a blazing crimson jersey on the field with a beaming white 17 pasted on the back. Directly above it there's a name.


"He's a Chaser?" she groans, not at all excited about Quidditch being absolutely ruined for her now that that idiot prat was on the team. "Would it be awful of me to root for Ravenclaw?"

Emmeline shakes her flower child head. "You need to be open to change, Lily. Open your mind and your heart."

"Potter's filled out nicely, hasn't he?" coos Mary. "Seriously, have you seen his biceps? I'm sure he's got killer abs, too. All that Quidditch practice he did over the summer has paid off."

Lily loses interest in the game fast. Until, of course, said Chaser gets a rather nasty shove from the Ravenclaw beater and comes barreling into the stands, hands outstretched to brace his fall.

He lands, rather ironically, in her lap, his face pressed against her bosom.

"Uck! Potter, what in Merlin's—"

He shakes his head of untidy black hair and flushes as she kicks him off of her. He lands on the ground with a well deserved grunt and Lily issues a small "hmph!", crossing her arms across her chest.

"Evans, wow. You look good with a tan," he compliments, staring at her as if she's grown three heads all of a sudden.

Lily's left completely speechless, even when Mary begins to gripe about how Lily gets all the attention and really, she's not that good looking, because James Potter had just given her a compliment for the first time ever.

(yours are just kicking in)

She'll never forget the first time she is called a 'mudblood'.

Of course, Lily Evans isn't naive. She's heard the slur before in the halls, read about the term in the library, discussed in an after class debate with friends whether it qualifies someone receiving detention for saying it.

No one thinks it's that big of a deal.

Except that Lily thinks it's a rather big fucking deal, thank you very much, especially when she is the one being called a mudblood.

"It's disrespectful and rude and I won't stand for it!" she snarls in her meeting with Professor McGonagall.

"Miss Evans," Professor McGonagall presses for the third time. "Sit down."

"I will not!" she says, glaring at the boy in the seat next to hers. He's nursing a well deserved bloody nose. She can't believe Severus hangs out with that horrible bastard. "You can't expect me to share the same breathing space with that lousy waste of space!"

"Evans, sit!"

Lily sinks into her seat in front of McGonagall's desk and folds her arms tightly over her chest. She notices Evan Rosier zone in on her breasts and nearly lashes out at him again.

"You both have detention tomorrow evening," the professor announces and Lily blanches.

"You can't send me to detention!" she argues. "I have never been in detention, Professor. I don't deserve —"

"Assaulting another student, whether he called you what he did or not, is never an appropriate course of action and you will face the consequences of your poor choices, both of you," Professor McGonagall corrects tersely. "Now, get out of my office, Rosier. You can expect me to be meeting with Professor Slughorn about your behavior and I will deducting twenty points from Slytherin. I want to have a word with Miss Evans in private."

Evan Rosier leaves, grumbling. McGonagall turns to Lily, her severe expression softening.

"What on earth possessed you to attack him like that?"

Lily bites her lips, picks at her nails, scuffs her shoe on the stone floor.

"I just snapped," she confesses and for the first time that year, she feels the dam break and it all comes rushing out in a flood of desperate sobs and snotty sniffs. "My parents are getting a divorce. My mum's been committed to a mental hospital and my father's been cheating on her with one of his patients. My sister and I bonded over the summer and she just shut me out after everything and I'm just so angry with all of them that I just don't even know what to do with myself. If I don't stay busy, I just crack."

McGonagall listens patiently as Lily breaks down and shakes her head, taking off her spectacles.

"I'm very sorry to hear about all of that," the professor says genuinely. "It can be very difficult when parents separate. I think it might be healthy for you if you take up a hobby, get your mind off of it, channel those emotions into something productive."

"What would you suggest?" Lily wonders.

"It's too late to try out for Quidditch," muses McGonagall and Lily scrunches up her nose.

"I'm not very athletic," she admits. "Watching is fine, but playing? No way."

"Perhaps you'd like to join the school choir?" suggests McGonagall. "I'm sure Professor Flitwick would love a new addition."

"Eh," Lily says.

"Hm, well, the only other thing I could suggest is talking to one of teachers about becoming a student aide."

This causes Lily to pause, speculate, wonder.

She visits cleans herself up before heading to the dungeons. Runs into Potter and Black on the way down.

"Heard you pummeled Evan Rosier!" Sirius barks in laughter, slapping her appreciatively on the back like they were close mates. "Well done, Evans. Never knew you had it in you!"

James stares at her, smirking. "Is it true, what he called you?"

Lily puffs out her chest, setting her jaw stubbornly on her urge to cry. "Yes, but I don't think he'll be speaking to me for a while."

"Bloody brilliant," laughs Sirius. "Beat up by a hormonal girl."

"What the hell makes you assume I was hormonal?" Lily lashes.

"I just assume, well, because, you know —"

"No, Black, enlighten me."

Sirius backpedals, looking to James. "Prongs, help me out here."

"Well, girls are hormonal, yeah?" James picks up where Sirius leaves off. "I mean, we never know when your time of the month is."

Lily bristles and something about the malicious glint in her eye causes Sirius to take a step back, hiding behind James. "How extremely misogynistic of you, Potter. A woman's time of the month is natural and it in no way had anything to do with my reaction to some wanker calling me a racial slur. You are both so pathetic."

"Hey, that's not — did you just say wanker?"

"Shut up, before you both end up like Rosier!"

The two idiots dart off, whispering and laughing about how she must be on her period, simply has to be.

"Are you okay?"

Lily spins around to find Severus Snape lurking in the shadows, arms full of potion supplies. It takes only a second before Lily rushes into his arms and the supplies clatter loudly to the floor. She pretends she doesn't hear his heartbeat practically triple in rhythm against her.

"I don't know how you can stand Evan Rosier," she says after he's done consoling her in the way only he seems to be able to.

"He's not all bad," defends Severus, reaching out to brush the hair from her face. "He's the nicer one of my roommates. At least he's not Potter."

Lily rolls her eyes and straightens up, carefully disentangling herself from his long, lanky arms.

"Potter's an arrogant prick with a huge ego but at least he has never called me a mudblood," Lily says and Severus frowns deeply. "Anyway, is Slughorn around?"

"He's in his office, why?" wonders Severus.

"I wanted to see if he has an opening for a student aide," Lily explains, heading over to the office. "Seeing as how it's my favorite class and you are an aide, too. McGonagall claims I need a hobby to keep my mind off my parents splitting up."

Severus kneels to gather the supplies he's dropped and gives her a rare smile, one that makes Lily's stomach squirm. He's grown a bit taller over the summer and he's gotten a much needed haircut while she's been away and Lily doesn't know if she is starting to think he is somewhat attractive or if she is just feeling vulnerable.

Maybe she is hormonal.

(silent night, broken night)

Christmas is a quiet affair. Petunia doesn't return home from university, instead deciding to join her new boyfriend and his family in Ireland. Lily visits her mother briefly on Christmas Eve and she seems to be doing better — she's made a few friends, attends group therapy every Friday, and is on a strict regimen of happy pills.

"I don't like taking them," she tells Lily during their visit. "They help, but they make me numb and itchy. It's hard to feel anything while I'm on them. I feel like I'm in a dream sometimes..."

Lily gives her mother an art kit for her present because Emmeline told her art helps one connect with their inner self and heal their damaged energies.

When she returns to her suburban home, she attempts small talk with her father in an empty dining room over a Christmas ham. They exchange presents, watch a Christmas special on television while sipping eggnog, and retire to bed early.

She writes to Emmeline, whose family prefers not to celebrate Christmas because they don't believe in organized holidays or religions, instead enjoying a deeply peaceful spirituality deep-rooted in yoga retreats, peace rallies, and community service.

She writes to Petunia, pleads with her to come home, or at least write back.

She even writes to Mary, who is spending her winter vacation in Belgium, but she keeps her letter short and simple and does not expect anything back.

Both Emmeline and Mary write to Lily, inform her of the raging New Years Eve party James Potter's family is throwing that they've been invited to.

Lily won't admit it stings that she wasn't invited, but then again, why would Potter invite a 'raging hormonal psychopath', as he'd taken to calling her.

Petunia never responds.

"She's still angry," rationalizes Lily's father when he drops her off at the train station at the end of her break. "We just need to give her time."

(i want to hold your hand)

Lily's first actual crush — and by actual she means not a celebrity — is Benjy Fenwick.

He's sixteen years old, a full year older than her, and on the Gryffindor Quidditch team. He plays Seeker, has muscles to die for, and perfect golden hair.

Not to mention he's on the honor roll, a prefect, and incredibly gifted at Potions.

Basically, he is perfect in Lily's eyes.

So, naturally, when Lily's birthday arrives on January 30th, she wants nothing more than her first kiss with Benjy Fenwick to be her birthday present.

She has no idea that Mary MacDonald—recently humiliated after being rejected for a kiss over New Years from James Potter— takes a liking to stealing Lily's mermaid green journal from her bedside table drawer every morning when Lily heads to breakfast and reading her secret thoughts, most of which have recently involved her ridiculously giddy feelings over Benjy Fenwick.

She also has no idea when Mary MacDonald takes her diary to breakfast the morning of January 30th and shows the diary entry to Benjy Fenwick — and her birthday wish to be kissed by said heartthrob becomes public knowledge.

She has no idea until James Potter sits next to her and says, "So, you fancy Fenwick, huh?"

Lily nearly chokes on her pumpkin juice.

"No," she stammers.

"Really," James continues, snickering. "Because your diary entries seem to prove otherwise."

"What are you talking about?" Lily scoffs. "Leave me alone, Potter."

"Never pinned you as a diary keeper, Evans," James continues and to her horror, he brandishes Lily's green journal.

"Potter, what the hell?" she demands. "Give that back to me."

By now the news of Lily's crush is everywhere and Benjy Fenwick is laughing and James Potter is reading entries of her diary to the table in a high pitched voice and Lily can't take it, Lily has to leave, Lily has to break something —

Furious, she does the only appropriate thing she can think of and dumps the entire breakfast pitcher of milk over James Potter's untidy hair. He yelps and she takes the opportunity to snatch her diary from his hands.

She promptly whacks him over the head with it several times, harder each time, until James Potter is howling, outraged and panicked, spewing insults at her.

"Hideous— rotten—horrible—little—prick!" she screeches with each blow.

"Bloody—stop—Evans—ow—shove off—mental—psychopathic—clearly on your rag!"

And for a brief second, she truly believes she will strangle him to death, but then she realizes she's crying and everyone is staring at her, laughing at James, laughing at her.

"I hate you," she sobs.

And twenty minutes later, Benjy Fenwick finds her outside with Severus Snape underneath the giant oak tree they meet to study under, screaming and ranting about ' that toe rag Potter'. Despite Severus's noble attempts to be rid of Benjy, including a rather snakelike hiss of "Piss off", Benjy successfully steals Lily away.

"Oh, God, Benjy, I'm so embarrassed," Lily sniffs. "That stupid Potter always trying to ruin everything."

"It wasn't Potter that took your diary," he tells her. "True, he's a prat but he can't get into your dormitory. You should know it was Mary MacDonald."

Lily's mouth falls open.

"She's angry with you because she thinks James Potter fancies you or something," Benjy explains.

"First of all, he doesn't and anyone who thinks there's any chance someone as utterly stupid as him could even comprehend having actual feelings other than adoration of himself is crazy, and secondly, why would she be angry with me for something she thinks Potter feels?"

Benjy laughs nervously. "Well, because he rejected Mary at his party over winter break."

"That still doesn't explain how I'm connected."

"Apparently, Potter told her he had feelings for someone else and when she demanded to know who, Potter told her that he fancied you," Benjy said.

Lily's mouth literally popped open. "I'm sorry, what? Potter doesn't have feelings for me. He antagonizes me."

"Haven't you ever heard that boys often pick on girls they like?" Benjy attempted.

"Maybe grade schoolers," Lily scoffed.

"Anyway," Benjy continued. "I read the diary entry before I realized what it really was and I'm sorry for that. It's never okay to take advantage of someone's privacy like that. She'll have detention for sure."

Lily has no idea what to say to him. Instead, she just smiles.

"Thanks, Benjy."

"No problem, Lily," he says and her heart jumps as she realizes he knows her name.

And despite Severus's steaming glare and the tears still resting on Lily's cheeks, Benjy Fenwick leans down and presses his lips against hers, feather soft and very brief.

"Happy birthday," he whispers afterward and after a quick nod in Severus's direction, heads back up to the castle, leaving Lily swooning and Severus seething.

(bitch, i run this show)

Lily does not hesitate severing ties with Mary MacDonald.

She doesn't hesitate confronting her and explaining why she is severing ties with her, either.

She's quick about it and polite and bold as only Lily can be and she leaves Mary in tears, not because she's said anything horrible but because she's the first person to tell Mary's entitled self that she isn't perfect, never will be, and she'll never be happy if she keeps tearing everyone around her down.

Mary's never been talked to that way. Mary always gets her way.

And Lily is done giving Mary her way.

In fact, Lily decides she's just about done with giving anyone their way. She's tired of hearing Mary gossip about Severus and displeased with the cruel nature of Evan Rosier and his group of jerks and aggravated with James Potter bewitching the corridors to appear upside down all the damn time and sick of Sirius Black's growing sexual harassment of the female student body.

And so begins the anti-bullying, rule-abiding, moral high ground streak that Lily Evans will be known for throughout the upcoming years.

She and the Marauders do not get along for the rest of the year because of this.

She remains friends with Emmeline even though Emmeline remains friends with Mary. Lily meets up with Emmeline every Wednesday to receive her horoscope updates in their spot in the Astronomy Tower after dinner and meditate. She connects with Severus under their oak tree to study and enjoys the time they both spend as aides for Professor Slughorn.

And somehow, each Quidditch match, she always ends up sitting in the same vicinity as the Marauders. James Potter has taken an annoying habit of pointedly flying past her section each game and winking at her. He claims it is for 'good luck'. After several games, Remus and Lily eventually strike up conversation when they realize they've both brought the same book to read during the match and realize they have a lot in common.

She writes home to her father often to make sure he's doing okay being alone. She's pleased to hear that Petunia has returned home, deciding to continue her university education while living at home to be with her family and save money. She visits their mother often and is slowly warming back up to their father.

Though, Lily's father is a bit concerned over Petunia—maybe it's the stress or school or she's been fighting with her boyfriend?—she seems to have lost a great deal of weight and never seems to have an appetite. Lily assures him it's normal for her stage in life—Petunia is always fine, even when she isn't.

Lily's growing more confident, she's excelling, and she's loving life.

Until she arrives home for summer vacation and realizes her life will never be the same.

End of I: 1974-1975

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