Reluctant Fangirling and Other Seductions

It was probably the strangest proposition he'd ever received. "I'm really sorry about this, but I've decided to become your fangirl." "My fangirl?" "Yes, and I think it's only fair to warn you beforehand." fem!Naruto, no Uchiha Massacre, Shisui x Naruko



"I'm really sorry about this, but I've decided to become your fangirl." The young blonde girl really did look repetent.

"My fangirl?" Shisui was understandably confused.

"Yes, and I think it's only fair to warn you beforehand." Shisui stared at her. She was the Hokage's daughter, so he probably shouldn't call her crazy…

"Why do you want to be my fangirl?" Naruko sheepishly rubbed at the back of her neck.

"I don't really want to," she confessed, "I barely even know you. But all of the girls at the Academy are forming puppy crushes, and my friends will think it's weird if I don't act silly over some boy too."

"Puppy crushes?" He was starting to get a bad feeling about this.

"On Sasuke Uchiha," she clarified, "It's starting to get ugly too. Just yesterday, my friends Sakura and Ino got into a fight over him, and now they're not talking to each other anymore. If I don't admit to liking somebody, than they'll assume that I have a secret crush on Sasuke, and my friendships will be in jeopardy."

"Why don't you have a crush on Sasuke too?" Shisui was genuinely curious. His cousin had certainly griped about the females of his class enough.

Naruko shrugged. "I just don't. He looks a little girly, to be honest. And I don't think he's worth risking my friends."

Shisui laughed. "You have a good head on your shoulders. So, why'd you pick me as your target?"

"You're good-looking enough that they'll believe me," Naruko smiled, "You're not in my class, so I won't have to pretend very often. And you seem like a laidback type of guy, so hopefully you wouldn't mind playing along?"

Shisui arched an eyebrow. "And if I agree, not that I have, mind you, but if I do decide to follow along on your scheme, what would that entail on my part?"

"Oh, you don't have to do much at all," she replied earnestly, "I'll blush and stammer around you in public, and you just have to look mildly annoyed sometimes. Maybe make that 'hn' sound, you Uchihas seem to like so much. It won't be very often since we move in different age groups, and I'm not the giggly, squealing type of fangirl anyway."

He had one last concern though. "Your father…?"

"Where do you think I got the idea from?" Naruko rolled her eyes. "He's too relieved that I don't like Sasuke to be mad about it. So, what do you say? Will you be the unwilling recipient of my affections?"

"Hn," Shisui grinned.



"Naruko! The girls and I are going to see Sasuke train with a fuma shuriken. It's going to be so cool! Do you want to come?" Ino Yamanaka, childhood friend and sensible kunoichi-in-training when not in the presence of a certain mutual classmate, asked.

She was leading a group- or hunting pack, as Naruko privately termed it- of preteen girls, as she smiled cheerfully at the other blonde. Ino Yamanaka was a social butterfly of the highest order, and between her extroverted personality, hard work in the ninja arts, and pretty face, she was also one of the most popular kids. Despite said popularity- and clear desire to go watch Sasuke- Ino always made time for Naruko, and tried to drag her along on her many social pursuits.

It was something that Naruko would have appreciated more if boy-watching wasn't involved.

"Thanks Ino, but I've got something else to do," Naruko replied, offering a smile to Sakura. It was hard to maintain a balancing act between the two, but as long as she treated the rivals equally, both pretended that she wasn't friends with the other.

"What could be better than watching Sasuke train?" Ino demanded, looking genuinely put-out by her response.

If Naruko were honest, her response would be 'anything, up to and including, yet another lecture on the inherent evilness of boys from my father', but Naruko was not above perpetual lying.

"I want to find Shisui-kun," she said instead, offering her new favorite excuse. The blonde girl added a giggle at the end. "If I'm lucky, he might be practicing water-walking again!"

Ino nodded approvingly. "I can't wait until Sasuke has to practice advanced chakra control while shirtless," she sighed. "Well, don't let me keep you waiting! Good luck, Naruko!"

"Thanks," the Honourable Daughter chirped, before grabbing her backpack and hightailing it out of the Academy courtyard. She had never actually seen Shisui train before, but it's not like that little detail stopped her from crafting elaborate stories when she wanted some free time.

Boy-stalking, or pretend boy-stalking at any rate, offered a wealth of new opportunities for Naruko. It served as a polite excuse to avoid social engagements with her peers, forced her to seek out secluded grounds that were better put to her own training, and gave her a legitimate reason to call Sasuke the 'Lesser Uchiha'.

Normally, Naruko would exert the bare minimum of effort possible towards looking for Shisui, because Ino was definitely a rising information specialist, but she needn't bother now. The girls were busy with Duckbutt-bastard, and she had an excellent scroll on fuuinjutsu bindings that was just begging to be opened. So Naruto tree-jumped her way to a secluded forest clearing by a stream that the Naka River branched off to, and was soon happily engrossed in her esoteric symbols.

Ironically, it was this very peaceful sanctuary that Shisui Uchiha stumbled into less than an hour later.

Naruko's ears pricked back at the muffled thump of wood against wood, and she looked upwards, only to blink owlishly at the figure above her. Swinging his legs against the tree branch, grinning down at her, was a teenaged boy wearing a form-fitting Chuunin vest over a ridiculous high-collar shirt. One could tell that the Uchiha had no friends in their village, because no true friend would allow them to dress that absurdly.

"Hello Naruko-chan," Shisui greeted, "What are you doing here, on Uchiha grounds?"

"I was stalking you," Naruko informed him, "Admiring your unattainable beauty from afar, basking in your glory, and vainly hoping that you will one-day notice me, despite our age difference, social circles, and lack of personal interaction."

"I see," the Uchiha nodded solemnly, "Wouldn't it help your cause if you were searching for me more actively though? Maybe frequent my usual training grounds?"

Naruko scoffed. "Please, Uchiha. Leave the fangirling to the professionals. I clearly know what I'm doing. You're here right now, after all."

"An excellent point," he conceded, "You must be some type of Seer. So what are you reading?"

Naruko tipped the scroll forwards so he could catch the writing. "I plan to use it to capture you."

"Neat!" Shisui said brightly, jumping down on the grass and sitting next to her, "And what will you do when you have me at your mercy?"

"I don't know." She looked like she was fighting a smile. "I haven't gotten that far yet."

"Well, I'm very ticklish, so you can start off there," Shisui suggested, "Just make sure you don't look me in the eyes. My Sharingan is advanced enough to put you under a genjutsu through visual connection alone."

"You could probably use your chakra in a number of ways to escape from my bindings," Naruko pointed out.

"You're right," the dark-haired teen frowned, "And that would put a crimp in your plans to ravish me, won't it? Here, let me show you how to draw a basic chakra-suppression seal…"



It was Valentine's Day, and Naruko was busy in the kitchen. Her mother was next to her, and they were busy cutting, mixing, and molding a basket full of homemade chocolate. Each heart-shaped chocolate would be drizzled in vanilla, peppermint, or green tea sauce, and brushed with the lightest covering of cocoa powder. It was Kushina's personal recipe, and every year, without fail, mother and daughter would make a batch together.

And every year, also without fail, her tou-san, Kakashi-nii, and Jiraiya-kyoufu would storm into the house and eat every single treat. Naruko would be left behind a mere pittance of chocolate, and not repaid in the least, with the store-bought excuses her sheepish male family members would give her on White Day. But this year, Naruko had a Plan.

"Kaa-chan, can I take a few of these for… um, someone else?" she asked quickly, looking down at her feet. Naruko couldn't actually force herself to blush on command, but she could remember all those years of losing her fair share of the bounty, and the rising fury reddened her cheeks about the same.

"Someone… else…" Kushina repeated slowly, before a wide smile crossed her face. Abruptly, she burst into a squeal, and glomped her daughter into a hug. "Oh, Naruko, of course, you can! Who do you want to gift this to?"

"I don't really want to say," Naruko answered hurriedly. At her mother's drop in excitement, she added. "I- um, don't want tou-san to find out! Yeah, since, you know-"

Kushina held up a hand to stop her. "Say no more," the redhead nodded understandingly, "I completely understand, sweetheart. I'm so glad that you didn't take all of your tou-san's lectures seriously. I was beginning to worry you'd follow Kakashi's example, and never give me grandchildren."

"But," Kushina added, pouting down at her, "You'll tell your beloved, trustworthy, and totally awesome kaa-chan everything later on, won't you?"

"Yes, kaa-chan," Naruko nodded obediently, and held out her hand, "You don't have to wrap them or anything. A paper plate will be fine."

"Nonsense," Kushina said hotly, "Valentine's Day is special, and this will be your very first time giving chocolate to a boy. I have plenty of tinfoil available and this kickass orange wrapping paper with adorable little kunai designs. We can add an orange ribbon, and- well, maybe not a card, since you don't want to come off as too strong."

"Oh, I have the best idea!" her mother suddenly spun around to face her, a glint appearing in her eye, "The poor dear will be terribly embarrassed if you ambushed him with chocolates at the Academy. In my days, only Minato was happy to receive them that one time Mikoto signed my name off on her gift, and he was girly and totally unreliable! You should go and give him the chocolates now."

"Kaa-san, I don't really think that's the best idea," Naruko began, but her mother would not be denied. Ignoring each one of Naruko's increasingly desperate protests, Kushina deftly wrapped up the chocolate, tossed her unwilling daughter outside, and gave her firm instructions to place it directly into the hands of her crush.

Had Naruko a different mother, she would have hidden away somewhere for a few hours, eaten the chocolate, and came home with a tale to prove otherwise. However, Kushina had seals to monitor heart and adrenaline levels in her home, and was notoriously impossible to lie to directly, so…

"Here," the sullen voice was accompanied by a box of chocolate shoved in front of his nose. "Happy Valentine's Day."

Shisui placed his kunai away, and accepted the garishly decorated package. "Don't you think you're taking this fangirling a little too far?"

"No," Naruko answered, "Now give it back to me."

"Why?" Shisui asked curiously.

Naruko's eyebrow twitched in mutiny. "So I can eat my chocolates," she hissed.

The Uchiha's eyes suddenly glittered with wicked humor. "But they're not your chocolates," Shisui countered, "They're mine."

He neatly teared open the package to reveal a dozen delectable sweets. Now, Shisui was no Itachi, but even he couldn't resist such a confectionary delight.

Naruko gaped, in inarticulate fury, as Shisui picked up one of her candies, and plopped it in his mouth. As the Namikaze heiress barely held back her full-body tremors, the Uchiha prodigy chewed slowly, savored the chocolate, and swallowed.

"This is really good," Shisui said in surprise, "I had no idea you could cook Naruko-cha-"

"DIE!" And Naruko tackled him.


One month later, to the exuberant delight of the female Academy students, the confused surprise of the male Academy students, and the horrified astonishment of one Uchiha Sasuke, Shisui no Shunshin appeared in the classroom. He ignored Iruka's bemused stare, resolutely marched up to the top aisle, and placed a massive basket of clearly homemade chocolates on a confused blonde's desk.

"They're not as good as yours, but I did try my best," he said apologetically, "Happy White Day, Naruko-chan."



"So, I hear you're trying to become the fastest ninja in the world."

Shisui smirked at her. "Here to tell me that I'll never take your father's title?"

Naruko scoffed. "Hardly. I'm here to tell you that I'm going to take it first."

She didn't know when her private training grounds had become 'his', or when his sanctuaries became 'hers', or when the clearing by the burbling brook became 'theirs', but that may have been because Naruko never thought about it. Did it matter? Shisui was enjoyable company, and let her practice her seals in peace when she wanted to, and taught her nifty shinobi tricks when she didn't. They worked.

"Big words from such a tiny genin," the Uchiha taunted.

Naruto scowled. "I just haven't gotten my growth spurt yet! Not everyone consumed their identical twin in the womb."


"It's my theory for how you became so tall," Naruko elaborated.

Shisui nodded. "Understandable. I'm just too badass for one being to handle."

"You're twice as annoying as every other Uchiha I know," Naruko huffed, "And you're going to be left in the dust when I finish mastering the Hiraishin."

"Your father's teaching you the Hiraishin?!" Shisui gaped, "You're twelve."

Naruko offered him a foxy grin. "He wants me to prepared for the Chuunin Exams in Suna, this year. Though I'm not likely to learn it in time."

"That's blatant nepotism," Shisui sulked, "Using the Hiraishin in the Exams cannot be fair, Naruko."

"Cause the Uchiha Clan is known for the meticulous and heartfelt effort they pour into learning new jutsus," she shot back. "And that Mangekyo is the biggest cop-out in history, Shisui-kun."

"I deny any and all accusations against jutsu theft," Shisui responded reflexively, before pausing. "Huh. You may just have a point there."

"I know I do," Naruko replied, "So… are you going to come and see me during the exhibition match?"

"Who says you'll make it that far?" Shisui arched a brow.

She crossed her arms. "I, Naruko Uzumaki-Namikaze, the future Godaime of Konoha, say so! This is an unprecedented opportunity to view my debut into the international stage, and only a fool would miss it! Besides, if you're lucky, you might just pick up some fighting tips."

"We'll see," was the diplomatic answer.

In the next two months, Shisui filed for vacation time, and filled out a request for a travel visa. He sat in the second row, left-center seat during the rounds. Naruko progressed to the semi-final match, lost against a genin from Kumo, and didn't make Chuunin, but Shisui took her out to ice cream anyway.

Only one cone though, he insisted, because ice cream in Suna was expensive.



"Tou-san needs me to attend some fancy dinner party for nobles." Naruko's tone made it clear exactly what she thought about that idea.

"Doesn't he usually send you off on missions when those come around?" Shisui asked, feeling too lazy to lift his head and look at her, but not lazy enough to pretend sleeping. Not that it would work. Naruko was scarily accurate at reading his facial expressions.

"Yeah, but I'm sixteen now, which means more people are pressing for me to go," Naruko scowled. "Probably so they could push random sons and grandsons in my direction in the hope of fostering an alliance with tou-chan. I don't know why they bother."

"Your father would never stand for it," Shisui agreed, "Is he still telling people that you're undergoing training to become an eternal miko?"

"Everyone knows that tou-chan's living in his own delusions," Naruko made a face. "Kaa-san says that if I don't have a date than every boy will demand that I dance with them."

"Okay…" Shisui drawled, closing his eyes and enjoying the sunlight against his face, "Good luck?"

Naruko walked closer to his resting spot, and plopped down beside his prone form. A second later, Shisui felt torn bits of grass littering his face. His nose twitched. It was a little ticklish.

"Well?" Naruko's voice was impatient.

He raised a hand to brush the grass off. "What?" He sounded confused.

"This is when you gallantly offer to be my escort for the evening," she told him.

Shisui considered it for a second. "No, thanks."

Naruko poked him. "Shisui!"

"I hate stuffy parties like that," he complained, "Force Kakashi to be your date instead."

"Aniki took a mission right before tou-chan told me," she huffed, "The traitor."

"Then you have my sincerest sympathies, Naruko-chan," Shisui smirked, "But being a Hokage is more than being able to wear fancy robes and having the right to call yourself the strongest ninja in the village. Sometimes you have to do the hard things. Sometimes you have to dance with the daimyo's lecherous grandson with the pig snout, beady eyes, and food stains. For Konoha."

"A Kage is also supposed to have support from her loyal ninja," Naruko poked him again, "And as your future leader, I demand that you agree to be my date."

Shisui considered it again. "No."

Naruko sighed. "Name your price."

The grin that just spread across the handsome Uchiha's face was positively gleeful. "Two weeks of home-cooked dinner, with at least two meals being sukiyaki and the Uzumaki special tempura."

"One week of home-cooked meals, and each dinner will be accompanied by dango," Naruko countered.

"Ten days, free dessert, and you stop calling Itachi, my 'boy-toy'," Shisui offered.

"I'll agree to ten days and ending an awesome long-running prank," she allowed, "But I'll be buying the desserts, and it won't be anything fancy."

Shisui's smile was angelic. "Deal."

A few hours later, Shisui was knocking on the door of the Hokage Residence, having been waved in by his ANBU Guards. He wore a pressed black tunic over black trousers, inlaid with simple, polished wooden buttons, and with the Uchiha symbol emblazoned proudly on the back. The Uchiha had made a halfhearted attempt to tame his unruly black hair, and despite still being somewhat messy, it fell in attractive waves over his dark eyes. Between his high cheekbones, pale complexion, and pleasant smile, Shisui made a strikingly handsome image.

The smile fell off his face, when the door opened, and the unamused Yondaime looked back at him.

"Shisui," Minato Namikaze said flatly. He didn't bother to add his usual affectionate suffix. "What are you doing here?"

The young man smiled nervously. "I'm here to guard your daughter tonight, sir. As Kakashi-sempai wasn't available, I figured that it was the least I could do, as her friend."

"Oh, come in then!" And suddenly the Hokage was all smiles again, as he ushered his shinobi in. "Naruko is just about to come down. Why don't you wait in the living room for her?"

"Yes, sir," Shisui bobbed his head obediently. Inwardly, he mused that he should have demanded a higher payment.

Sitting against the sedate blue couches of the Namikaze home- Kushina-san really seemed to like colors that reminded her of the ocean- Shisui waited. He heard Naruko's approach before he saw her, and thus was looking towards the doorway when she approached.

'There's something very strange about her appearance,' Shisui thought, warily.

His eyes flickered over her, and catalogued the details. Neon orange kimono, bright blonde hair, vivid blue eyes, smooth tanned skin, cheeky fox-like grin, three whisker marks on each cheek… physically, she looked just as she had that morning. And he could still smell a faint whiff of oranges and ramen broth from her direction. Her chakra even felt the same, like a rolling, tumbling mess of energy whipping around her with the mere promise of serenity at the center of the storm.

But there was something undeniably, inexplicably, irrevocably wrong about her.

The Uchiha returned her greetings in a dazed mumble, as he tried to pinpoint the train of his thought. Naruko looked concerned, but he waved it away, offering her an arm and leading her to the party with a distracted air. When he was about to put away her coat, it came to him, with an abrupt rudeness akin to falling off the bed, in deep sleep.

Naruko was attractive!

It was like the first stumbling steps of water-walking, like barely ducking below Kakashi's Chidori in a spar, like throwing yourself off of a flying summon just before you braced your legs with chakra. It was something you knew, a facet of truth lying innocently in your mind, before it decided to pick itself up, and wholly similar to its subject, threw itself in your face. It was upfront and audacious, and utterly unashamed to have made Shisui's entire worldview shift as a mere side effect of its existence.

Some time in the last eight years, Naruko had turned from the strange, silly, brash little girl telling him, in all seriousness, that she would be his fangirl, to a confident and beautiful young woman that men would be attracted to. A young woman that Shisui was now attracted to.

"My anticipated lifespan had drastically shortened in less than five minutes," Shisui mumbled.

"Shisui? Did you say something?" Naruko asked, looking up at him curiously. She had dragged the two to a mildly covert corner, where she could glare any considering suitors to submission. The Uchiha found himself approving of this.

"I'm just regretting breaking my Hokage's faith in me, Naruko-chan," Shisui sighed. He turned around, and placed his hands on her shoulders.

"In the spirit of fairness, I believe that I should warn you now," the young man said, seriously.

"Warn me about what?" Naruko asked. A soft smile spread across her companion's face.

"I've decided to become your fanboy," the Uchiha answered.


A/N: I normally don't do this, but… this one-shot is written on behalf of Ghiro, and is a late apology. A really, really, really late apology, and I want to express my utmost consolations through it. Your charming message did make me resolve to update Shinigami's Child, but I clearly forgot somewhere along the way, and well, I hope you'll read this. *slams palm against forehead in frustration* I can't make a proper apology to save my life…