A/N: Hey, guys! Here we are again!

With the end of TAoI, it's time for something new. Last fall, I wrote a donation piece for the Fandom for LLS. It's a great cause, and I encourage you to look into it on its next go around.

Here's the piece I donated: an outtake to Key West. Now, it's not completely necessary for you to have read Key West in order to get this, but it does help. ;)


So here we go, another peek into the lives of DeepDiverward and his Beautiful Bella.

Betad by the lovely Michelle Renker Rhodes.

Props to what belongs to S. Meyer. The rest is mine.

Key West - The Honeymoon

Part 1: My New Wife is One Damn Dirty Girl


"Bella, sweetie, remind me again how long you and Edward will be away on this…quirky honeymoon catamaran tour of yours?"

"I told you, Mom, we're not exactly sure. We've got a few stops planned, but then we're just going to play it by ear – or by wave as the case may be."

Bella chuckles and squeezes my thigh under the table, a clear indication that she'd like me to follow suit with the humor.

I roll my eyes and train them to the creamy slice of Key Lime Pie before me.

She gives me another, much more urgent squeeze. I swallow the moist, tangy bite already in my mouth, look up at my brand new mother-in-law, and force a chuckle.

You're a god-damn hoot, Renee.

Renee smirks. "While that does sound like…ahem, fun, it also sounds more than a bit reckless. You'll be sailing around in the middle of nowhere. How will your father and I know that you're alive?"

"Your daughter will be just fine, Renee. I would never let anything happen to her." My attempt to respond as respectfully as possible while twisting my lips into something resembling a smile is probably nullified by the fact that the words come out through gritted teeth.

She ignores me anyway - as usual.

"At least the honeymoon that you and Mike planned had a clearly defined place and time so that I would know how to get in touch with you and when you'd be home."

My brand new mother-in-law flashes her eyes my way and graces me with a smile as phony as the one I just gave her, poorly camouflaging the fact that she just very thoughtlessly – and more than a bit bitch-like, I might add - mentioned The Prick Who Shall Not Be Named on my wedding day.

My wedding day.

Before I manage to completely lose my shit and push back from this chair so that I can reach over, pick up my mother-in-law of only a couple of hours, and topple her over the side of the Eclipse, my beautiful new wife cups my groin under the table and digs the tips of her little fingers into my scrotum. Then she starts massaging my cock and my balls.

The grin I'm now sporting is much more sincere.

"Dear, wonderful, Renee, I'll make sure that Bella calls you from every single port we hit, and as soon as we have a clearer picture…" – I trail off because Bella is rolling my balls through my black linen pants, and I can barely even remember my name much less what the hell I was trying to say. Then she wraps her fingers around the outline of my growing hard-on and begins tracing every bulging vein she can find. Her fingers move back and forth along my length, and when she finds the tip, she-

"A clearer picture…?" Renee prompts impatiently. Only then do I realize that I stopped talking about five hours ago.

"Oh, uh…" – I breath out through narrowed lips while Bella fondles me, smiling innocently and holding my gaze while she waits along with everyone else seated around us to see if I'll be able to finish my sentence.

I clear my throat. "As soon as we have a clearer picture of when we'll be back here in Key West, I'll make sure that you're the first to know, Renee." I finish in an admittedly shaky voice.

"Well…" Renee purses her lips, clearly unsatisfied – as usual - with my response.

I couldn't give less of a fuck right now. My new wife is slowly and quietly pulling down the zipper of my pants, and in the next second, my cock is literally in her capable hands – which is only fair since it's been figuratively in her hands for the past three and half years.

"I suppose I can't expect much more," Renee continues.

"Mom, I promise we'll stay in touch as much as possible, but don't forget, it is our honeymoon," Bella says.

Thank God for Bella picking up the reins of that inane conversation because my brain is about to explode - along with my cock.

"Oh. Well, of course it's your honeymoon, honey." Red blotches of embarrassment appear over Renee's face, making her look like a sunburned tourist. Then again, it could be the spots dancing before my eyes that make her look that way. "I wouldn't expect you to call me every day."

Meanwhile, I'm squirming in my seat, half trying to break free from Bella's insistent grasp and half thrusting my cock harder against her hand. Beads of sweat break out along my hairline when she begins teasing the moisture forming at the swollen tip of my length. I press my lips together tightly, fisting my hands over the table to keep from groaning out loud.

"Edward, are you okay?" Charlie, Bella's dad asks.

"Fine." My voice sounds embarrassingly high and strangled. I feel my facial muscles contracting into what I'm sure must be an alarming expression when seen someplace other than a bedroom. Making a weak show of tapping my chest with my closed fist, I say, "Just…indigestion…oh God."

"He's a bit allergic to key limes," Bella lies straight-faced. She fists her hand all the way to the base of my dick and then slowly slides it back down.

Jesus, I'm about to come all over myself right here on a boat load of people helping us celebrate the happiest day of my life – of our lives: our wedding day.

I only vaguely manage to follow the conversation going on around me.

"If he's allergic to key limes, why is he having key lime pie?" Renee asks. "If you ask me, that's not very smart."

Bella strokes me back and forth, back and forth.

"Because he wants to, Mom. You know, it is okay to break free once in a while and do things just because you want to."

"Edward, honey, since when are you allergic to key limes?" My mother asks.

My balls bounce between Bella's perfect fingers. My eyes roll to the back of my head.

"Look at that, he can't even speak. You don't think he'll pass out or anything, do you?" That's my dad – at least I think it is.

"No, Dad," Bella reassures him calmly. "He just needs to release…a couple of burps, and he'll be fine."

"Oh, okay." My mom breathes much more easily. "I'm sure you know what he needs, Bella." See, unlike Bella's mom, Esme Masen couldn't love and trust her new daughter-in-law any more. "Edward, honey, go ahead and do as Bella says," Esme encourages. "Let out a big burp. Don't worry, we won't mind. We've all burped in public at some point."

"Jesus," I moan.

"Yes, honey," Bella grins. "Just go ahead and let out a big burp in front of everyone. We're all waiting."

My new wife is one damn dirty girl – and I love it.

A finger starts trailing south past my balls, and as much as I want – no, need - to come, there's no way in hell I'm going to let her go there while we're here in front of our closest family members. Through my dazed mind and blurry eyesight, I can already see the knowing smirk on my cousin Tanya's face, as well as on the smug mug of my new brother-in-law, Emmett.

I drop a hand under the table and immediately curve it around Bella's hand, stilling her mind-blowing yet misplaced efforts.

"Edward sweetie," she chuckles, "are you sure you don't want to…burp?"

"Oh, I'm dying to burp," I smirk, "but I'm not about to do so right here in front of everyone. Don't worry, though. I can guarantee you that I'll be burping pretty hard later on - over and over again. All over you and your sweet little key limes."

Bella bursts out laughing. When she withdraws her hand, I stick my swollen appendage back into my pants as carefully as possible.

Renee makes a sound of disgust under her breath, shaking her head. "Ugh, Mike would've never thought of burping at the table!"

"Stop it, Renee," Charlie whisper-hisses. "He didn't actually burp, and besides, Edward is ten times the man Mike was. Look at how happy he makes our little girl! Anyway…" he leans into his wife's ear and drops his voice to a whisper - which isn't as low as it could be, "I don't think they're really talking about burping…or key limes for that matter."

While my mother-in-law puzzles over that one, I take a deep breath and try to calm my still racing heart. When Renee finally gets it, her eyes widen in horror.

I grin at her.

"Oh God," she chokes.

Bella kisses me soundly, and we both laugh.

"Ready for our honeymoon, Mr. Masen?" she asks in between kisses.

"With you as my wife, I'm as ready as I'll ever be, Mrs. Masen."

A/N: Thoughts?

As I said, this will post daily through Valentine's Day.

Twitter: PattyRosa817

Link to 'Stories by PattyRose' is on my profile page.

See you tomorrow!