Marinette was supposed to feel lucky.
Knowing that your masked partner that wooed you was actually your real-life crush you've been pinning for more than a year, and the fact that he accepted you wholeheartedly was enough to bring you to the Gates of Heaven.
But why was it she was seeing the Entrance of Hell?
"C'mon Purr-incess, I nya-w what you're feline right meow." the blonde boy mused as they walked shoulder-to-shoulder. "You cat fur-ever deny me."
From that day onwards, she'd be tortured by his insufferable puns. Terrible puns. Not-so-funny puns.
"Purr-haps, you paw-fur bread ones?"
And as much as she would like to throw the handsome guy with a sexy voice in the deepest part of Seine, she couldn't out of fear of committing murder. She has morals to uphold not only as a superhero, but also as a law-abiding citizen of France.
"You butter knead to relax s'mores, since it's eclair that we're pan-dering how to roll this new revel-ations."
This dork was really, really testing the extent of her patience.
"Baguette. Buginette. Marinette. Wow, I never realized the rhymes!"
She walked faster, abandoning the whines of a certain person like a kitten that was kicked outside the rain.
"Mari! Don't dessert me!"
She didn't look back as she entered their classroom to fetch her things. They were the only students in the campus, so she was a bit lenient about his theatrics.
"Marinerinerinari~" Adrien cooed, blocking her way as he plucked his bag from the table. "Hear me-OUCH!"
"This!" the designer stabbed his chest with her index. "This is the reason why I don't want you to know about my identity!"
"Hey, they're not bad." he defended with a pout.
She whimpered. "Why do you want me to suffer this way?"
"You mean suf-fur." he suggested, which made his companion left him out with a grunt. He immediately followed.
"Don't talk to me." she snapped.
"Aww, Bugaboo. We just made up for a minute and then we're back fighting again. What kind of relationship are we having?"
"None. And I don't want to talk with strangers."
"But you're talking to me."
She stopped when they reached the bottom of the entrance's stairs. Her face puffed out with bottled anger yet Adrien couldn't help but drove her to the edge.
If her stuttering mess plucked his heartstrings, her flushed irritations strummed them completely.
This might be the reason why some kindergarten kids would often tease their crushes.
She miffed as she punched him squarely. He almost lost his balance upon impact, but laughed ridiculously on her stomps.
"I hate you!"
"But I love you!"
His declaration caught them off-guard, which made them both flushed in bright red.
The designer couldn't make a comeback. She was scared to read between the lines only to get a wrong assumption, so she decided not to speak at all.
The model was downhearted when she simply stared on the road and never uttered a single word as they reached the bakery.
It was the most awkward five-minute moment of their lives, but everything vanished when the door's chime sounded.
"Oh Mari, I'm glad you're alright." Sabine rushed as she wrapped her daughter with an embrace. "I've heard there were lots of casualties when the akuma flooded the entire Paris."
"I'm fine, Maman. I was on a safe place when it happened." she responded the gesture.
"Seems like a certain Prince Charming swept you off to a safer place." the mother teased, eyeing the flustered boy and winked.
"Oh, Adrien's here?" Tom's voice boomed behind the counter.
"Hello Mr. Du - ACK! - I mean, Tom! TOM!" the blonde coughed, then corrected himself when the burly man tackled him.
"Watch your manners, sunny boy, or our paths will never croissant again."
Adrien gasped. "Tha - that's breadful!"
"Papa!" the pigtailed girl exclaimed. "Don't!"
"Don't what?" her father tilted his head with his arm still wrapping around the model's neck. "We're just loafing around."
"Your daughter is scone-cold, Sir."
"See?! You're encouraging him!"
Two men feigned her some innocent looks, then shrugged.
"I doughnut want her to treat nougat way."
"At yeast I tried - "
"That's it!" the poor girl announced with surrendered hands as she marched upstairs. "I'm out!"
Sabine chuckled on the exchange. "I think both of you needs a better peace offering."
"Don't worry, hon." her husband nudged. "I know my boy here knows how to claw a lady's heart."
Adrien only gulped audibly.
He was chasing his Lady for almost a year (and counting) and still lost like a stray.
"Why don't you bring her some chocolate chipped cookies and few croissants? I warmed few of them in the oven." the Chinese woman suggested while offering him a tray. "My daughter might be a nit-picky princess, but she's easy to please."
"Uh, right." was his reply.
"Do you want anything, Dear? Like cheese sticks or something?"
"Erm...Camembert?" he asked. "Do you have one?"
The woman hummed. "I think we have a slice. Let me get it for you."
If Adrien stayed for a moment before opening Marinette's trap door, he might've witnessed Tom and Sabine's waged bets.
"I bear no ill will." he stated sheepishly as he poked his head out. "I even brought some gifts."
Marinette harrumphed when she swiveled her chair around. On her desk was a plate of cookies, and a small, red blob figure with a black spot on its head beside it.
That made him realized he was in the presence of Ladybug's real identity.
"So you're using human language now?" the girl huffed.
"I can speak Chinese, if you want."
Closing the trapdoor behind him, a black blob immediate flew out of his shirt and landed on his tray.
"Camembert!" Plagg squealed in delight.
Well, what's new on that.
"So you're actually the person behind Chat Noir."
"The cat is officially out from the bag." The model answered while placing the tray near the settee. "And apologies for my kwami's rude behavior."
"It's alright, Adrien. He's been like that since forever. Always a glutton for cheese." the red kwami answered between nibbles.
The black kwami huffed to disagree.
"You have the most adorable and understanding guardian, My Lady." his charger commented, then took a piece of bread to eat. "Plagg is nothing but full of shits."
"Mine has her own quirks as well." the designer slyly looked at the red blob. "Right, Tikki?"
Adrien choked his bread.
"Adrien?! Oh my - are you okay?!" she squeaked as she rushed beside him, then made some circular hand motions on his back. "Here. Drink some water."
He complied until he half-emptied the glass, sputtering. "Wa - wha - what did you say?"
"Uh...are you okay?"
"Before that?" he asked again, then clarified. "You said about Tikki."
"Yeah. My kwami."
The blonde looked at her with bewilderment, which concerned her greatly, especially when he pored his gaze over to her worried kwami.
"What's wrong with - "
"Ti - Tikki? Your kwami's name is Tikki?"
"I just said yes."
Still not convinced, he looked at the kwami in question
"Yeah. My name is Tikki, Adrien." was the reply.
The model was stupefied and shocked beyond belief. Crashing on the floor, he ogled at the appalled red god like she was the answer to the mysteries of the universe - though in reality, it was just a simple question of Marinette's love confession during her sleep state - and with that dumb realization, he laughed.
He laughed because he forgot that 'love' has several concepts, aside from Eros.
He laughed because his perturbed feelings were caused by some sort of misunderstandings.
And most of all, he laughed because he got jealous over a Miraculous kwami.
Then he stopped.
Then glared at the instigator.
It was his kwami's turn to laugh.
He growled. "You little piece of shit - "
"Gyahahahaha! Oh crap, my side hurts! Oh cheese-sus, your face was epic gold!" Plagg guffawed at the boy's murderous glares.
"You didn't tell me Tikki is a -"
"That's not part of our contract, boy." His kwami snickered while wiping his tears. "And I don't think Princess here would like to have you learned everything from a third party. That's cheating!"
Adrien had to muster all of his strength not to drown the stupid god in a toilet bowl.
"You - "
"Erm, hello?" Marinette interjected as Tikki flew and rested on her shoulder. "Don't you want us to join the conversation?"
The black kwami hovered. "Oh, Tikki. You gotta believe on this hilarious situation. Listen, my smitten kitten here got jea-"
"-lous over you because Princess said she loves you!"
Red-faced, the model was grasping his flying kwami in the air, battling both his mortification and anger but no avail.
He knew he had to mark his calendar and label it as his Day of Tribulation due to several Revelations that happened in less than a day, courtesy of the black cat who spilled everything out from the proverbial bag.
Tikki, who got several experiences on her belt in terms of romance, immediately caught the drift, which ended her up rolling on the ground laughing.
However, Marinette did the opposite.
Watching at the commotion, she asked. "What's wrong with loving your kwami?"
There was a moment of silence before the three stilled and gave her impassive looks.
"Though I humbly appreciate your affections Marinette, but no, there's no problem with it." Tikki nuzzled her cheek. "You're just pure and sweet like a cinnamon roll."
Plagg gaped incredulously. "I can't believe Ladybug is a thick-headed - HRMPH!"
"Oh, sorry about that, kids." the red kwami interrupted, arm-locking her counterpart. "Plagg can't control of his tongue. He likes to plague minds, you know. So I bet we need to have our reunion be celebrated on our own after years of separation. I'll bring him outside for privacy. Now. Bye!"
The teenagers were left speechless when Tikki forcibly shoved Plagg upstairs and vanished behind the balcony door.
"It seems like you've won the kwami lottery, Marinette." Adrien said dryly. "She knows how to handle Plagg."
"Your kwami is adorable on his own." she replied amidst the confusion.
The model scoffed. "As I've mentioned, Plagg is full of shits. Tikki's right - he can't control his tongue. He'll blabber anything under the sun. I don't know why I got stuck with him."
"You just love Plagg." she told him, then smirked when he scowled. "You might say some bad things about him, but there's this endearment on your tone. And I bet he's similar with you. Both of you are...uhm...I forgot what's the term..."
His brow perked up. "Opposite attracts?"
"No." she waved her arms. "It's...damn, the word is on the tip of my tongue."
"Want to have a cat got it out for you?"
She kicked him lightly on the shin, which had him snorted especially when she twirled her finger in the air.
He gave her a beady eye. "What?"
"Yeah, Tsundere! I remember!" the designer hollered. "It's something like you showed hatred on the outside but love on the inside - tsundere! Yeah!"
"How mean, My Lady. You used a geek term to describe our impossible relationship." the model pouted with crossed arms. "It's not that I love Plagg, but - "
"Just like what Tsunderes used to say!" she giggled.
"You wound me, Princess." he grimaced, until a sudden thought entered his mind.
His shit-eating grin suddenly grew as he sauntered towards her.
"If we'll going to evaluate all the rejections that Ladybug did with Chat Noir's advances." he teased. "Does that mean she's a tsundere?"
Marinette gaped at him. "What?!"
"Adrien, you...you..." she growled as he whistled happily.
Irritated at his quirks, the girl tackled him on the floor, punched him lightly on the chest as he sing-songed.
"I knew it! Ladybug is a tsun-tsun! Tsun-tsun! Lucky me I almost captured her heart!"
He failed to filter his words terribly, and never realized it even after he got lost from her ticklish attack.
You're already there, Marinette mused internally. Stupid cat.
While both bodies were rolling on the floor as they fended each other's assaults, a cluttering sound caught their attention.
They paused, then looked at the broken lucky charm that fell from Adrien's pocket.
Realizing their closeness, they shuffled away with profused blushes, then looked at the charm again.
They felt like the offended object was pleading for their unwarranted attention.
"We need to fix your lucky charm." she told him.
"Yeah." he grumbled. "Let's."
What a way to kill the mood, you damn lucky charm.