I flinched when I opened my eyes trying to slowly adjust to the daylight coming inside the room. I tried to sit up but my body felt more heavy than usual. My mind felt groggy like it hadn't rest at all. But unlike last night, I remembered the dream or rather a nightmare and unlike most nightmares that we forget as soon as we woke up this one can't be forgotten even if I tried. It felt like a river of memories rushed to my head pounding me with waves of distraught, grief and sadness.
I see, so that's why I have this growing unease every time I think about it… about her.
Emotions from my past have resurfaced and took hold of me once again. I should have noticed this sooner to prevent this happening. But it's too late I let my guard down and let my emotions get the better of me rather than listen to reason. When did we even drop the formalities and started addressing each other by our first name? I can't recall but the reason must be because of this peculiar situation we're in. We got in too deep with this made up family scenario that it felt like it was natural for us to address each other like that. I need to control myself to become the person I made myself to be.
I know now what I must do, I needed to correct myself and save myself of the mistake I'm on the verge of repeating.
However some part of me is hesitant. There's a small thought in my head warning me that I'm mistaken, that amidst the strong conviction I have was a tiny plea asking me to not lose what I could have right now.
I dressed for the day and after getting ready I walked into the dining room to be greeted again with a scene a similar from yesterday.
Two figures sat adjacent at the table in the middle room. There was a young child having breakfast and in front of her was a slender figure that looks like the adult version of the child which was in the process of drinking her tea.
Yukinoshita noticed me then gently puts down her teacup to greet me.
"Oh, Good morning." followed the little girl
"Good morning" I reply back with my usual tone
"I prepared a cup of coffee, drink it while it's still hot" Yukinoshita offered
"Sure… thanks" I replied nonchalantly
"Rumi chew your food properly" Yukinoshita directed to Rumi.
I empty my mug quickly while they converse.
"Thank you for the coffee, If you'll excuse me" I stood up to leave the dining area
"Wait Hikigaya-kun, we'll be going to town so please prepare."
I stopped walking away.
"I don't feel like joining you for today"
"Eh?" They both remarked as soon as I said that. I'm not surprised by their reaction. They didn't expect to decline now that we three have always been together these past days.
"Why?" Rumi asked.
"I just… don't feel like coming along today. Sorry"
"That's it? That's not a good excuse. That's barely an excuse… I don't understand" Rumi exclaimed in defiance.
There was a short pause. I didn't explain myself more.
"Rumi, that's enough." Yukinoshita interjected
"But.. but…" Rumi stammered
"You shouldn't force people to do what you want. It's his decision not to come and since he is adamant about it then there's nothing we can do about it." Yukinoshita stated firmly to Rumi
"ok" Rumi answered back defeatedly
I was surprised. I didn't expect Yukinoshita to accept my decision not to go along with them. I looked back unconsciously only to be met by her stare back to me. I looked away instinctively.
"If you'll excuse me then". I immediately exited the scene.
"ok" Rumi mumbled
Yukinoshita's eyes linger for awhile directed to my direction.
It was a bit past noon, the two girls left about 10 minutes ago. I sat in my room, left all alone to contemplate.
Humans are creatures of habit. We act like we want to experience something new every time but in reality we don't really strive to change if we are content with our current lives. Before we pursue change we try to acknowledge first if its benefits will surpass our current status without risking what they currently have if things don't work out.
If I had to think it out loud then No I am trying to pick a fight with her or destroy our current relationship. In fact I'm protecting what we have right now, from myself.
Look I already know how this story ends. here let me tell you what will happen.
Rumi will be reunited with her parents then live a normal life once again. Yukinoshita and I will go back to our regular day to day lives. go to school. meet in that service club after classes, we'll talk with our usual conversations, finish any requests that comes our way, go home after. rinse and repeat until graduation. then... that's it... that's all what this will be.
My teen romantic comedy is exactly as i imagined it would be.
We'll each go on our separate way. We'll try to keep in contact but eventually move on never to see nor hear from each other ever again. I'll graduate, get an average job. I'll reminisce from time to time the moments I spent in the service club. I won't get married... not because I don't want to but because it's the most likely outcome. I'll remember the times I acted as a father figure to a child that almost lost its life and smile knowing I did good. I'll get old then pass away with neither a smile knowing I did not live my life as fulfilling as it could be but also not with a frown because i lived life exactly as I intended it to be.
I'm fine with this. At least that's what I keep telling myself.
The trip didn't last long. It didn't end up as satisfying as she had hoped it would be. The trip itself was uneventful or more precisely, boring. She could say that it was boring because it was the same sights she had seen in her previous trip but she knew exactly why she felt it was lacking. Its because his father wasn't with them that day.
The pair ended up going back to the cabin after an hour or so. It was a lot earlier than she was expecting. The only thing the young girl can remember was how her mother was quiet all the time as if deep in thought.
Hours pass by, the day is almost done and It was almost nightfall. what happened after the trip with her mother was the usual, she had conversations with her parents, she questioned his father about this morning but he had the same unsatisfying answer. They had quiet dinner that evening.
It was subtle, you could probably brush it off as nothing but she was convinced that there's something wrong. They were talking to her normally but when it comes to each other, well they barely had to converse to each other but when they do talk, it felt lacking. Like they were only having the bare minimum, it didn't have the same flare compared what to their usual banters had. sure it might just be the young girls imagination. but still she could not stop feeling uneasy.
She wanted to break the tension somehow. She couldn't progress with his father so she went to her mother.
She found her mother hunched over a bit in her chair after doing the dishes. her bangs are covering her eyes and her left hand covered her forehead. The little girl approached her.
"Mama, can I talk to you for a moment?"
But the taller ebony haired girl didn't react as quickly as she used to.
"Rumi?, I'm sorry I wasn't paying attention. Could you repeat that?"
The older girl answered a bit groggy
Upon closer inspection the little girl noticed that her mother's face was flushed. She the recalled her mother's previous appearance and understood what was going on. She reached out and touched near her neck to confirm her suspicions.
"Wait, Rumi" Yukinoshita yelped in surprise.
"Papa. Mama's sick please come help." I yelled to catch father's attention
The moment he heard her, he came rushing to the site.
After a few explanations, by Yukinoshita about the exaggerated claim, Hikagaya escorted Yukinoshita to her bed to look after her. Rumi wanted to be useful but was dismissed early after Yukinoshita confirmed that she will be fine and urged the young girl to rest for tonight too.
After everything is done and Rumi had nothing to do anymore, she then retreated back to her room. the long day was about to be over.
He visited Rumi in her room to check up on her. he saw her sitting at the edge of her bed. She noticed his presence.
"Papa?", said Rumi
Just checking up on you. See how you're doing" he replied to make his intentions clear.
"Come in then" the young girl urged him.
He entered and sat right next to her.
"How is she? will mama be alright?" she asked immediately.
She's in bed now. Her temperature was only slightly above the normal, It could have been caused by the heat today or that she overexerted herself again. Still, it was good you noticed it early before it got worse"
Rumi let out a sigh in relief. True, overreacted earlier but it is better safe than sorry.
"Her fever is almost gone last I check, she should have a full recovery by tomorrow after she sleeps tonight" he continued
"That's good to hear then.", she proclaimed
If you'll excuse me then" he then stood up to leave.
"Wait" Rumi immediately blurted out.
Is there something you wish to talk to me about" he asked
Not really, well there is one actually" she replied back but was hesitant to talk about the topic.
Rumi wanted to ask about his parents. she wanted to ask why his father was suddenly aloof towards her mother. But the young girl wasn't sure on how to go about it again. She didn't want to waste this chance and end up not achieving anything. So she thought of a roundabout way to ask it.
He sat back down and then looked back at her.
"Do you ever have days when everything feels... wrong. and sometimes you don't know why, yet you just know you do."
He was a puzzled by what the young girl asked. He was sure she was going to ask about something else. He had no choice but to think then about what she was asking right now.
He nodded his head as a reply. "Yes, definitely have those days."
Really?" the young girl looked up, a bit surprised "you always looked like you're on top of things, that you can easily brush off any negative thoughts and move on."
He paused a little to compose his thoughts.
Well, listen there are two things you need to know. The first thing is that everyone has days when they feel not okay at all. people who have everything they could want or people who are content in life, even people who smile most of the time can still feel down. Some are just better at hiding it than others.
And the second thing you need to know is that it's alright to not feel okay at all. In fact all you need to do on those days when you don't feel alright is come and find me and tell me. Don't ever feel like you have to hide the fact that you're not feeling well.
Always come and tell me. Because I will always be there"
The little girl couldn't help but smile.
"Then will you also talk to mama, i think she had been hiding something... and I feel like you've been hiding something from her too."
"Papa, will you be there for mama too. I think she needs you even if she won't admit it."
After saying that I then looked at him straight in the eyes. I was afraid he wouldn't take me seriously that I didn't make the right choice to convey what I want.
I clenched the edge of his shirt and asked. "Papa, please look after mama, at least stay stay by her side tonight".
He looked at me in a surprised expression. Perhaps I overdid it.
He was slightly taken aback after everything I just said but immediately composed himself.
"Rumi, lets give her space for tonight to give her time to recover, she should asleep right now and I don't think I should stress her by waking her up to talk to her."
"But... I understand" the conversation left no room for argument so she couldn't help but look down
He then held my shoulder to catch my attention.
"Don't worry too much about it. I'll check up on her from time to time just to make sure she's alright.
I'll try to talk her tomorrow once she's fully recovered, okay" he remarked to lift up the young girls spirit.
the little girl nodded, a light smile is traced on her face.
"Now go to sleep or your mother will reprimand you for sleeping in again." he followed up.
"Okay", he tucked her in and said their good nights,
Rumi closed her eyes hoping tomorrow will be better for all of them.
After closing the door to Rumi's room I headed to Yukinoshita's to check up on her again.
I thought that I might not need to address this with her. That we can go by as we are right now from now on. But deep down I knew that I have to make things clear because nothing ever goes my way.
I brace myself for the confrontation.
I opened the door and found her resting in bed. I walked and sat on a chair near the bed just to confirm she was fine. My emotions were mixed, I felt a bit disappointed now that all the preparation was all for nothing but deep inside there's a part of me thats relieved, that I didn't have to confront the issue today. Now that the talk is postponed, maybe we never have to address it at all.
As I move to stand up I steal one last glance at Yukinoshita. She lay straight facing forward. Her white almost pale skin blends with the clean sheet around her. She had a look of calmness on her face. Usually she seems so strong and confident yet right now she looked so delicate. Her face emanated such serene expression…
I closed my eyes and reflected on my recent thoughts. I was lost in thought about her again and about certain topics not concerned about her health. Thankfully I'm more self aware now.
Calm down. Stop thinking about it. Don't think about unnecessary things. I recite in my head like a prayer to keep my mind in check
I turned back and walked towards the door unconsciously making light steps to not disturb her slumber.
There came a whisper from behind me so quiet that I barely heard it. I paused. I was surprised to hear her voice. I thought she was already at deep sleep given the slow pace of her breathing. I was careful not to make a sound so I couldn't have woken her up.
That confirms that I didn't imagine it. I turned around and walked back.
"How are you feeling?"
"I feel a lot better than before"
I held my hand up to her forehead to make sure. As my hand touch her forehead I confirmed that indeed her fever is gone by now. I felt relieved that she's finally recovered. Although there is a slight red on her chee… oh no
I retracted my hand as fast as I could apologize
"I'm sorry. I should have asked for permission first."
"No, It's fine. I understand that you only needed to check my temperature. I didn't mind it"
Careless… careless yet again. Why do I keep making mistakes like this when it comes to her? I understand my intention is only to know her temperature and yet I get very bothered by something so simple. I'm reminded again why I needed to distance myself from her as much as possible.
Yukinoshita spoke to break the tension
"Thank you for taking care of me"
"You're welcome" I replied after a short while not knowing what to say more.
"If you need anything else. I'll be outside" I remarked to escape this awkward moment
I stood up and headed back. I walked with the same pace as I did earlier and headed towards the door.
"Wait", as I held the doorknob I heard her voice once again
"Can I have a moment of your time?"
I looked back to her and noticed the unease in her voice as she said that. I walked back to my chair again and sat. I studied her expression. Her eyes now cast downward showing uncertainty.
"Yes?" I asked
Her lips move slightly yet no reply came. She felt hesitant to say something.
"If you're still feeling unwell, please do not hesitate to say so. Trying to be embarrassed about it will only make it worse for all of us." I talked further to ease the tension.
"No it's not that. I'm fine now really. It's just that I was thinking… I wanted to ask... that is if…"
I've almost never seen her uncertain. She's bothered by something yet she couldn't downright say what she wants.
She then looked back at me and immediately understood that I noticed her troubled demeanor. To compose herself, she held a deep breath to calm down, looked at me eye to eye and asked,
"Hikigaya-kun. Why are you avoiding me?"
And with a simple question our role was reversed; now I'm the one troubled. I felt the gravity of the question and what it implies. I was under the impression that she did not mind my behavior much this past few but now I know it bothered her as much as it bothered me.
"I… What do you mean?" I hastily replied to cover my unease.
"You've declined my invitation this early morning. You go out of sight every time I enter the vicinity. You can talk pleasantries with Rumi but with me you only converse briefly with the sense that you do it only with strict urgency." Yukinoshita explained pouring out all the stress she had built up.
I looked away as she finished explaining.
"Those don't mean anything. You've been worrying yourself over nothing. None of those are…" I held my tongue and didn't finish saying none of what she said is true. I couldn't lie despite my intentions.
She simply stared at me with eyes unfazed by that poor reply. She knows that I fully understand what she meant. She remained composed; still waiting to hear a proper answer.
But not another word came out of my mouth. Even at this moment I'm still hesitant. I cannot answer her. How can I even properly communicate it to her? Do I even need to explain myself to her?
She closed her eyes upon seeing my reluctance.
"If you can't answer me properly perhaps it would be best if we talk about this another time" She replied with a hint of sadness in her voice.
Seeing her depressed figure gave me reason to answer. I've had this conflict inside of me for far too long. It felt unsettling to think that we might lose all the progress we've made.
I need to talk now or I might end up losing something far more precious even though I may not fully understand what that is.
"Lately because of the situation we got into, I have gotten closer with you." I finally replied back
"You know I'm happy with what I have right now. Yes, despite all the hardships I needed to endure I am happy with the relationships I've built. It should have been more than enough for someone like me"
So I was afraid... afraid that if things go the way they are right now then eventually I'll do something that's unlike me. That I'll risk losing what I have because I couldn't be content."
Because of that I tried distancing myself from you. But that ended up doing more harm than good.
I look down, preparing to say my final point
"If it is fine with you, can we remain as we are right now... as friends."
I lowered my gaze and felt my heart sink the moment those words escape from my mouth.
But it had to be done. Hopefully with this declaration I can avoid having those thoughts about her again. That I'll never have to look back and be tempted to act like the naive Hikigaya Hachiman I once was.
I stared back at her waiting for a reply. I couldn't read what expression she was conveying after everything i said. I grew weary by the minute due to the silence that permeated.
"Ne, Hikigaya-kun", she said breaking the silence
Yes?, i followed with a reply
"Can I ask you a question?"
"Did you ever have a dream?" she asked. "Something you wanted so badly and just when you think you're about to reach out and grab it, it disappears?"
"I had a lot when I was younger, trying to reach one every time only to be disappointed time and time again." I answered, my voice guarded.
"Eventually I got tired and stopped trying
Everyone has dreams that don't come true and I'm no different in that regard"
Her shoulders slumped. "Yeah," she said, "I guess you're right."
"I'm not sure what you're trying to tell me," I said.
"You see I never had to dream on my own. There was already one made for me.
All I had to do was do everything I was told to and I'll eventually have it. Then everything that came after became trivial. After all, the road ahead was already paved. I only needed to walk forward. Everyday became the same with nothing new to look forward to"
She paused and took a breath before continuing
"That is until a certain boy stood in front of that road. Since then my life almost turned upside down. And just when I thought that it couldn't get any crazier. He brought a child right at my doorstep." she paused and smiled slightly.
"I've experienced things I never expected to happen. I mean for someone like me to stand in as a guardian... no as a mother."
I've had countless headaches and pain all thanks to that boy but even after everything I had to endure I couldn't bring myself to hate him. In fact I can't help but smile despite it all.
I could have ignored him, I could have closed the door and none of this would have ever happened to me but I didn't and because of that I felt something I've never felt before. Something I believe to be... genuine
At first I thought it was simply gratitude I've felt towards him but over time I became aware of what it truly is. After all he was always on my mind. Im happy every time we banter, im sad whenever I see him get hurt, I get lonely whenever he is not around."
Stop it, stop it, in my mind I was begging her to stop talking. This is breaking my resolve. My mind is in more disarray as it's ever been. All the talk I did earlier was almost nothing compared to what I'm feeling right now. It's taking every will in my mind to hold off the urge to confess to her, to embrace her and never let go.
"I'm sorry, Hikigaya-kun
I said it before and now I'll say it again. I don't think we can just be friends so..."
She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, her hands clasped together and started trembling just visibly from where I stand.
She then opened her eyes and what greeted me was the most sincere look I've ever seen of her.
"Please go out with me. I want to stand beside you. I want to hold hands with you. I want to be there for you... always, from now on"
She confessed in reminiscence of the boy who once asked for something genuine. In that moment the invisible wall he have put up between them has all but shattered.
He moved towards her and embraced her, wrapping his arms around her waist. She was slightly taken aback to what happened but quickly returned the hug by wrapping her arms to his back. She closed her eyes and leaned further into him, dropping her head into his shoulder and feeling the last of her worries wither away. Thus they realized what they needed all along.
In essence, language accounts for a mere 30% of human communication. The other 70% is made up of information collected from eye movements and other body language. Right now they don't even need any words to communicate with each other.
When at last she lifted her head their eyes was once again inches apart from each other. Her blush became more pronounced. They then felt each other slightly trembling becoming self aware of their proximity. But remained locked in the embrace as they recall staring at the same eyes back then at the infirmary. Though this time I'm afraid it won't end the same way as before.
Their instinct then took control and let the moment progress to what it would naturally lead to. They both slowly lean forward until their lips finally touch.
We parted our lips quickly as it came in contact as if a jolt of electricity coursed through them. Thus breaking the embrace and leaving both the embarrassed teenagers to contemplate on what just occurred.
Our faces are now clearly flushed. We kept looking at any direction except from the eyes of each other trying not to let the other acknowledge the embarrassment they're feeling right now.
Yukino raised her hand and placed her finger to her lips trying to trace the sensation she had experience.
"so... this is... a kiss..." the long haired girl remarked, the pauses made it sound more like a question rather than a statement.
A kiss... an actual ki...no... Would that be even considered a kiss? our lips barely touched and lasted no more than a second before our heads moved away. It was more like a peck of a bird than a kiss.
"that... counts as a kiss?" i remark in a questioning tone voicing my inner thoughts.
"A-Are you disappointed with your first kiss, Hikigaya-kun?", she asked with a worried tone
"No, no I didn't mean it like that, I'm not disappointed in fact I think I even used up all the luck in my lifetime to have this happen to me. It's just that I thought kisses are suppose to last longer... based from what I know" I hastily replied to correct what I meant.
"I see, for a moment there I was worried that you disliked it because of me. That it was my fault for not making you feel satis...
I mean, you do also have yourself to blame for lacking the skills for kissing properly, she quickly changed her tone to mask her insecurities.
"what? I'm not the one who jolted back after our lips slightly touch." I retorted
"And you're surprised? It was a natural reaction to having their first time taken by someone like you"
"Don't say it in a way that can be misunderstood. It was just our first kiss (not a great one) but at least not the one where I could get arrested if someone else hears you"
"So your mind would instantly interpret it like that then hikipervert-kun. I feel like I made a big mistake confessing to you earlier"
"A mistake..." he said in somber tone then looked down. "maybe you're right... maybe it is"
"Eh?" she was taken aback suddenly with regret" wait I... I'm sorry... I didn't really mean what I just said." the sharp tone instantly vanished and was replaced by the sincere one she had during the confession.
"I really do want us to be... together" she whispered
"So It's true, I wasn't dreaming earlier... underneath all the ice the cute and honest Yukino does exist."
The girl looked into his face only to find an amused smile painted on a sly face. In that instance she knew that she fell for his trap. Regret quickly filled her mind
But the battle is not yet over. Before she could react in an annoyed expression she quickly covered her face with her hands and began the counterattack.
"How cruel." she said continuing with the sincere tone of voice "Here I am pouring my heart out to the boy I love and in return my emotions gets to be toyed with for amusement.", she continued with her voice slightly trembling
The smirk was now gone from his expression.
She then moved her hands down to reveal moist blue eyes and a pained expression.
"Do I mean so little to you... hachi..."
He took a direct hit, his heart shattered then melted at the sight. In that moment that felt like an eternity, he feels like he's the lowest of the low, a scum of the earth and someone who didn't deserve to be loved.
He bowed his head along with his upper body at an almost ninety degree angle asking for forgiveness.
"Im sorry" he voiced loudly.
"I didn't mean to hurt you... I never did or ever will. You mean so much to me, you're not just anybody to me. You are, and what we have right now is everything to me."
He didn't dare lift his head. his mind is in a disarray lamenting the fact that he tried to be facetious.
"I do like you.. I love you too" he murmured letting his heart speak.
She then spoke.
"Hmmm... the monster of logic letting his emotions run amok. Truly a rare sight to behold" she said in her usual tone of voice.
He then looked up and found no trace of her previous sad state and was replaced with her usual demeanor. Though still had a slight blush caused by what he professed.
"Well now that we said everything that needs to be said. I guess we're even." she followed up not wanting the situation to remain awkward.
It is obvious to both of us why we keep teasing one another. We are putting up an air of confidence in order to maintain a level headed appearance to try to hide our embarrassment. We both clearly in fact have no experience in this matter and are trying to compensate.
Still that back and forth banter helped us regain our composure plus it helped us be more comfortable given the situation. Although she really shouldn't have taken it that far. I don't think I can take another hit like that again.
"all this, stemming from one botched kiss... sigh", he said unable to express a more formal response
"Ehem... Then we just have to do it properly this time", she declared to end the bickering
She moved her hand to take hold of my own hand. She slightly raised it to let our fingers intertwine
We lean towards each other to continue. Once our faces are only inches apart, a slight hesitation sets in causing us to pause our action for a short moment. We then closed our eyes and let our lips touch once again.
The voice of reason in my head was drowned by the quick tempo beating in my chest. Events were happening so fast that we could barely keep up.
Lost in this moment was the ice queen and monster of logic. What's left is just a boy and a girl braving the unknown.
She closed her eyes and lay down in bed while our hands kept on hold without breaking, making me position myself on top. I moved my right hand on top of the bed beside her face to support my weight on top of her.
She slowly opened her eyes and with it deep blue orbs focus onto me.
Her mouth slightly opens. i heard a faint word escape, barely audible if not for me being so close her.
"Hachi..." she whispered in an endearing tone.
her free hand moved towards my face while our gaze continue to lock on one another. her finger made contact and slowly caressed my cheek
"Hachi..." she whispered once again in the same soft voice.
I couldn't resist. I lean forward until our lips connect.
Her hand moved from my cheek to the back of my head to further deepen the kiss while our other hand held more tightly as we continued the act.
I've lost count on how many times we repeated it. Every kiss lasted longer than each before that we gasp for air now after every contact before doing it once again with increasing passion.
The intimacy is intoxicating. I could smell the floral scent of her shampoo, the warmth permeating from her, the soft sensation of her skin.
I rise a bit higher from the last kiss gasping for air. The last vestige of my thought I've been ignoring manage to slip through the emotions that dominated me that night.
"I... I should go back now, before I ended up staying here for the night" I spoke, conveying a message she can understand.
"It's alright, I... I won't mind if you stay by my side tonight" she replied almost immediately.
"Are you sure, we might experience... another first if things go on as it is now"
"Then... let's see how far can it go." she said teasingly
She moved her hand to my chest and started unbuttoning, I reciprocated and moved my hand to her waist to lift her shirt...
"Mama, Papa, have you two made up" a sudden voice came from the door.
"Aahh!" we both yelped in unison
Surprised by the sudden voice we break contact. I immediately moved to her side almost jumping away. We looked at the place where the voice came from and found Rumi holding the doorknob with the door slightly opened.
"Are you two alright?" The young girl came closer to inspect. "Are you still sick mama? your face is red all over"
"Eh! No I'm fine this is nothing" Yukino looked away embarrassed.
"Hmmm, are you truly ok, you too papa, you both looked... messy. Did you both have a fight?"
"No, we didn't fight. We just had a discussion, right Yukino?" I said to convince the young girl.
"Yes, that's right"
We faced each other and saw the other still a bit flushed. We looked away the moment our eyes met. Now that clarity has returned to us. We couldn't to look at each other knowing what happened or what might have happened. Thoughts about the event kept circling in my mind. If Rumi didn't come we could have gone all the way and I'm more scared to think if I'm disappointed or not that it didn't happen
"Why are you here Rumi-chan, I thought you were about to sleep when I left you earlier" I asked to divert the topic.
"I was, but I was still worried about mama you so I thought to check up on her one last time tonight" she answered
"I was surprised to see that you're still here too Papa, Although why are you in bed with Mama?" she quickly reversed our position and I'm in the spotlight once again.
I looked at Yukino for help but I can see that she is too embarrassed to provide support for this one.
"Well, I thought that instead of checking her from time to time I might as well stay here for the night… With your mother's permission of course." I explained with a reason that's at least not as embarrassing to proclaim compared to the actual reason.
"That's a good idea, can I stay here for tonight too?", Rumi requested
"Sure" We replied. We moved to have more space between us so Rumi can fit in. Then we settled down.
From the window I can see the night is deep now. A could see a few stars from afar over here, the same stars Yukino and I both shared a moment with to gaze a night ago. Silence returned lulling us to let rest come to us at last.
"Have you both truly made up", the young girl asked once again.
"Yes, Rumi we've truly made up this time" Yukino answered then looked at me. Both of us understood that we've gained a lot more that what we thought we could ever have tonight. "We made our relationship clear. You don't need to worry about us again" she continued almost in whisper.
"That's great to hear" The young girl smiled then finally closed her eyes, happy to know that everything's all right now
I closed my eyes and my mind is now at ease.