Crash and Burn

Part…um…I forgot

Author:  Nyneve (yes, it's me!)

Hey everybody!  I bet you thought I forgot ALL about this fic!  And about fan fiction in general.  Nope!  I'm still thinkin' of it!  A lot!  Really!  Really really!  A lot!  Really really a lot a lot!  So if you're still thinkin' that I'm not thinkin', you're WRONG!  Cuz I'm thinkin' about it a lot.  And now that I've got you all annoyed, I'll just get on with the fic.  Don't own the anime, or the song I'm using in it ("Possession" by Sarah McLachlan).  Later!

-Nyneve

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I ran.

Course that's probably what you expected.

I just turned away from that base and ran, leaving Jamerson, Rhodes, Catalonia, everyone.

"Coward…"

It was the voice in my head, except it sounded a lot like Wufei.  I wondered if he'd been killed in the attack.  Did I care?  Sort of.  Just like I sort of cared that Duo, Trowa, and Quatre had been there too.  And like I sort of cared that it was my fault that Heero was dead.

There's no way it can be good when a spy can't remember which side they're supposed to be on.  Technically I'm on the Professor's side.  I should be, anyways.  Even though I hate it, I wouldn't have been accepted into OZ-II if I hadn't received the training from Heero.

But in my heart, I was loyal to my fallen comrades, Gruenwald, Garcia, Jamerson, and Smith.  Maybe I didn't owe my skills to them, but I know that I never would've survived the past three months if I didn't have them.  Spying or no spying, the Gundam pilots could never fill their shoes.

I stopped running, my energy gone.  Looking around, I realized I was in a small, commercial area.  There were a couple of art-type shops, a post office, and a couple of cafes.  Aimlessly, I wandered into the nearest one, ominously named, "The Breaks".

Once inside, I paid a few bucks for a cup of coffee and sat down in a booth.  In the corner, a girl about my age was playing piano and singing.  I recognized the old tune as one I listened to in high school.

Listen as the wind blows

From across the great divide

Voices trapped in yearning

Memories trapped in time

The night is my companion

And solitude my guide

Would spend forever here

And not be satisfied

And I would be the one

To hold you down

Kiss you so hard

I'll take your breath away

And after I'd wipe away the tears

Just close your eyes dear…

Through this world I've stumbled

So many times betrayed

Trying to find an honest word to find

The truth enslaved

Oh you speak to me in riddles

And you speak to me in rhyme

My body aches to breathe your breath

Your words keep me alive

And I would be the one

To hold you down

Kiss you so hard

I'll take your breath away

And after that wipe away the tears

Just close your eyes dear…

Into this night I wander

It's morning that I dread

Another day of know of

The path I fear to dread

Oh into the sea of waking dream

I follow without pride

Nothing stands between us hear

And I won't be denied

And I would be the one

To hold you down

Kiss you so hard

I'll take your breath away

And after that wipe away the tears

Just close your eyes dear…

How ironic that one song written so long ago could tell the story of my life.  Was I going to be alone until the day I died?  Would I spend the rest of my life being hurt and betrayed by people that meant nothing to me?

I didn't know.

Finishing my coffee, I headed out.

"Guess I better head home," I muttered, then realized what I just said.

Home?  Ha.  I hadn't had a home since…well, never.  I wasn't welcome at my mom's house.  School was school, not home.  I guess my apartment I lived in last summer had been home, but not now.  The flat I spent one day in?  Hardly.  The barracks?  They were, until they were reduced to a pile of rubble.

"Where do I go from here?" I asked myself.  I couldn't go to Earth, I had no money for a shuttle ticket.  No money for a hotel either.  Guess it was back to wandering.

I didn't run.  Rather, I just walked; I was in a dream world.  All the buildings were the same, and I didn't see anyone.  It started to rain, and I got cold, but I didn't care.  What did it matter anymore? 

Finally, I arrived at a bridge over a little aqueduct.  I never was very good at swimming.  If I just jumped, it'd be all over.  I could haunt this bridge, and listen to the stories of the people who were about to do the same thing that I did.

I climbed up onto the railing.  A cold wind blew in my face.  I took a deep breath.

I couldn't do it.

Breaking into tears, I allowed myself to fall backwards onto the bridge.  Landing on my back, I sat up and hugged my knees.  I was such a coward; abandoning my friends, running away, and not being able to take my own life as punishment.

I lowered my head and let the tears fall for what seemed like hours.  Then I felt something jut into my neck.

A painfully familiar voice spoke.  "Give me one reason why I shouldn't kill you now."

"I don't have one," I sobbed, looking up into the disgusted face of Wufei.

He remained silent, and kept the blade of his katana pressed to my neck.

"Please…" I whispered.  "Grant this coward one last request, Wufei.  You lived, do this for me.  End it now.  I can't do it myself."

As if to spite me, he was still quiet.  Suddenly, he threw his katana aside, yanked me up, and slapped my face.

"Listen to me, Aino.  You may be a coward, you may be a liar.  But you are not to lose faith, damn you!" he yelled.

I stared at him, bewildered.  "What are you…?"

"You lived for a reason, Aino.  Why can't you just be happy with that and get out of this?" he continued.

"I…can't.  You said so yourself, Wufei."

What the hell was I saying?!?!?!?!?!

My lips kept moving, despite my wishes.  "This whole time…you should've known.  I may have betrayed you, but I always gave you a head start.  I'm not trying to avoid the blame, but what happened at the base…that was your fault, not mine."

Wufei looked shocked.  "What?"

"We'd given up on you!  There was no new evidence of your location!  Sure we had Heavyarms and Sandrock.  No one was trained to pilot them, except me.  And I didn't come near them, I swear it!  I've been on your side this whole time!" I cried.

He narrowed his eyes and studied me closely.  "You saved that one soldier."

"He was my friend.  And I didn't have that many.  All but he died when the base exploded," I explained.  "Including…Heero."

"Yeah, we know that already.  Was leaving him behind your plan for revenge on us?" he asked.

I don't know what happened then.  I just lost it. 

I pulled out a gun and aimed it Wufei's face.  "DAMN YOU!" I yelled.  "AREN'T YOU LISTENING TO ANYTHING I'VE SAID?!?!?!  I WANT TO COME BACK!  I WANT TO HELP YOU AND THE OTHERS AND THE PROFESSOR GET RID OF OZ-II!  IF YOU'RE NOT GOING TO LET ME, THEN I'LL KILL YOU, STEAL DEMILO, AND DEFEAT THEM MYSELF!"

He blinked.  I blinked. 

Did he just possess my body or something?  Because what I just said was classic Wufei.  Neither of us were quite sure what had just happened.

"…Fine," he said, then turned away.

I looked at him, and cocked my head.  "What?  Where are you going?"

"DeMilo's been stored away on L2.  I also managed to escape with Nataku.  That'll have to do for now," he explained.

"Wait!  What about Duo and the others?" I cried, running up beside him.

He raised an eyebrow and looked at me.  "Didn't I tell you?  All three of them were captured, as well as their Gundams.  And the Professor's been missing for weeks.  It's you and me against the rest of OZ-II."

I couldn't help it.  I groaned.

This was going to be a lot more difficult than I originally thought.

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All for now, all!  R+R+R!